"Your mad that I'm Batman?"
('Well, what was I expecting, confetti?')
"No, Bruce, it's not that, not at all. I'm just sick of having all of my boyfriends turning out to be tight-wearing super-heroes it's getting just ridiculous!"
-
One day (filled with suits, one business, one pleasure and both black) which was just another day in the live of Bruce Wayne, or should I say Batman? Well, it was until she walked into my life.
(wearing Stilettos like she was made for them, back then I didn't know how right I was)
"Mr. Wayne, I'm Lois Lane reporter at the Daily Planet and I was wondering if I could get a moment of your time?"
She was all handshakes and politeness but I could see the passion of a reporter (and a damn good one at that) crawling out, it was a caged tiger and in a matter of seconds it would be released on me and how naive I was to think it would be a baby one.
"For a beautiful woman like yourself I have all the time in the world, shoot away. I'm ready for anything."
And that was clear because with in a matter of minutes with her I was ready to finally move on (the 'Rachels' in my head began to slowly turn to 'Lois') from all that happened before and move on with the strange new creature before me.
-
It was stated from the very start that one, she was not one of the many hussies that were by my side in the past (not just a piece of arm candy for me to show off, just one to eat all by myself) and two, I could try and tell her what to and about ninety-nine percent of the time she wouldn't follow a single word.
(that's my girl, the early days were always the best before her past came back to bite us in the ass, mine too)
It began as something that wasn't meant to last very long (her hate of super-heroes would have helped that) reporters and super-heroes are known not to work out as couples and besides that my enemies (Joker being the main one, the only one that I give a damn about) are watching my every move and she's the prefect bait now, because if it was me for her I would take a deal in a heartbeat.
And that my friends is the problem that I spent too much time not thinking of before it happened (just like in the past, in a blasé of flames and white make-up) just two days ago.
(after the 'I love yous' were finally said with devious smiles after a day of saving the world with both actions and words)
-
"I love you."
Falling, and falling hard, is always the easy part (the part that is the least painless, all of them but Smallville) it's the part where all the fun begins and the 'I love yous', moving in, and marriages are all in the future, only to be squashed by the many break ups which I am the queen of.
And also but of course I'm also the queen of heart-breaks.
(just ask the heartbreaker himself, Clark Kent)
But in this case Bruce Wayne (the bat-boy himself) is the first to complete the falling stage and even make it all the way to the moving in part of it all (and that is a big first for me).
The whole 'moving in' part (to the mansion that is bigger then all my past homes put together) will take place after my kidnapping is over and done with.
Oh, didn't I mention that at this very moment I'm being held by Joker and his many stooges?
(no, sorry, knowing me and my habit of getting napped by the bad guys you would have guessed where I was, becoming Joker's new plaything, oh joy)
"Are we having any fun yet, Miss Lane?"
And but of course the only day that my feet are missing the only deadly weapon I have, is the day I'm grabbed by make-up clad goons and dropped into a lair that looks like Frankensteins lab and Toys-R-Us mixed together.
"Loads and loads, being tied to a freaking chair is just so much fun."
This time my super-hero (whose name has changed from Superman to Batman, as you can see not that much of a change) doesn't run faster then a speeding bullet, so my chance of being a dead person with a forever smiling face has gone way up but knowing Bruce he might be just around the corner ready to save the day in his very own way.
(sadly killing the crazy son of a bitch was not one of them, maybe they aren't so different after all)
"Well, well looks like our bat-friend picked another spunky little dish, and I must say he does have good taste. Too bad I stole it away from him before he could finish it, now it's all mine."
Instead of him laughing (one day it might be the death of him, I bet laughing yourself into a coma is not very funny) which over the past five hours has been all he's done, it was my turn and I doubt the jokester himself doesn't like another people laughing in his face.
(most villains that I've had the misfortune of running into don't like that one single bit, just ask Zod)
"I myself have a right to laugh (big and long, right from my diaphragm) since my plan is going off without bat-wings to muddle it, but what my dear do you find so funny?"
(all of this was not funny in the slightest but the black form standing behind him with his many goons in piles on the floor was oh-so funny)
"Well, Joker, old buddy, I find you headless (and lipless, so no more smiling for you) very, and I mean very funny."
"Damn, and right when I was doing so well."
-
Yet another life-risking experience ended with my head still nice and safe on my shoulders, but this time I got to see and reward (with lots and lots of the kissing which he had been missing) him for all his heroics and the fact that this time there had been no causalities.
(unlike the many rescues with Superman, those always had to end with one person taking a dirt nap)
"I take that and that as many thank yous, Lois, without you and your habit of being bait for the criminally insane (even the Riddler just couldn't resist, and just look at Lex Luther) the Joker and all the rest of them wouldn't be locked up in nice padded cells. You deserve thanks also."
That my friends is the last thing in the world you'd want to be thanked for but I'll take it (and all the praise it gets me) and after all of those sickos are locked up nice and tight because of the invisible perfume, which I don't even know about myself, that brings them to be like moths to a flame.
(even Zod and Lex Luther both couldn't resist it, which is bad for me because just thinking of him makes me either want to smack someone, most likely Smallville back then, or hurl)
"It's an unwanted power, but I'll take the thanks anyway."
(and those thanks come in the form of kissing, which he is so very good at, and saving my butt from another crazy tomorrow)