/!\ Hello ! I wanted to warn you that I am French and my translation may be not very good. Sorry for the mistakes, and happy reading ! /!\
« Loki, no ! »
One last look. A solitary tear and ephemeral. Green eyes filled with sadness and disappointment. This was the last time he saw his brother. Loki let go the scepter and fell into the abyss of infinite space, disappearing into the darkness.
Thor didn't move. He stared without understanding where his brother had disappeared. He wouldn't leave. He wanted to stay there forever, and await the return of Loki. He couldn't be dead, he was not dead ! This had not occurred. Why Loki would commit suicide ? WHY ?
Odin, who was still holding his son by the leg, climb back cautiously.
And the whole truth, the magnitude of what had happened, it all fell at once on Thor.
A tear trickled down his cheek, then a second, third, and so on. He didn't believe it. Not right away. Not yet. He wanted to keep hope. The hope that he would wake the next morning, and that all this was just a terrible nightmare. Just a distant memory. He even wanted to be back on Midgard, if it could bring back his brother.
Whatever the betrayal, guilt and anger. He only wanted his little brother, his Loki. Whatever he be, whether related by blood or by something even bigger, louder.
Odin put an arm around the shoulders of his biological son and pressed against him. They go back, then Thor was locked oneself in his apartment. In his room. On his bed. The god of thunder remained motionless. His thoughts paraded all gaits. And always the same question: Why ?
And the only answer he found was « It's my fault. »
…
« If I had been less arrogant. If I could before realizing it, none of this would have happened. If I had noticed that for others, you did nothing but walk in the shade, and you did not share my sun, as I always thought. If I could have returned without that pride prevents me... If I could, I would you have reached out, my brother. I would have reached out, and you would have caught. I have condemned you to darkness, while you were a so beautiful light. Yes, you would have taken my hand, and we would have advanced together, always. Not like we did already, no. We would have really advanced side by side, nothing would have been more important than both of us. We would have affected the stars together, and our wings would not have burned in the sun. The darkness would not swallowed you, while everyone was draped me in light. You're my little brother, what you are, whoever you are. To me you'll always Loki Odinson, who cares that you were born Laufeyson.
Everything is my fault, my brother. I have not figured out pretty quickly. I have offered my hand for you too late. You had run out desire to catch it, the desire to be saved.
May you forgive me for this ignorance and terrible mistake, my brother. »
Thor turned on his stomach. He was exhausted, but he couldn't sleep. Her tears never stopped flowing, and the cushion was already soaked.
It was all screwed up. Everything was her fault. Already long ago, but the worst could have been avoided. Loki could have been back into light. The young god had simply turned a blind eye for too long, and he was afraid to open them again. He was only afraid that the sun shall burn her...
But now, it was too late.
He was dead.
Thor cursed him, and he cursed the fatal day when he went to Jotunheim. Where a small insult of Laufey make me did overreact. Where the words « Little Princess » did change radically his life. Everything was chained too fast. At first they had nearly died, then he had been banished. Loki had lied to him. He had tried to kill him. Thor had returned, and after having a discussion rather violent with his brother, he understood. He understood only when Loki let go the scepter.
His brother wanted to prove his worth. All he had wanted to do was show his father that he too could be strong. He too could be like Thor, and even better than Thor. He too was entitled to a place in the hearts of his father, not just as an object that could keep the peace. No. He was not this monster that parents talked to their kids at night, so they are well behaved. He was not a monster that would remove them in their sleep, he was not that! And even though deep down, Loki was born Giant Ice, he was Loki. He was always his brother and son of Odin. So what did he prove? It had nothing to prove. It had its place in Asgard, its place in the heart of their father.
Thor should had been angry. He should have a grudge against his younger brother. He could almost have wished his death. At least, move on, deny it, forget it. But it was impossible.
Loki was always one of the most important things for Thor, except his family, his pride and Mjomjo. Now he had lost Loki, and he found out he could get by without a hammer. He had lost the most important. The brother he had always loved, for whom he could sacrifice himself, despite all the betrayals. All plot.
For it was not blood that united the two son of Odin, but something even stronger. The heart. The mind. The soul.
That night, Thor did not sleep. He remembered all the good times with Loki. And, always, what had happened that night.
Yet the hope was always there, present, alive. And so he would keep this hope in him, Loki could only survive and return one day. Thor was certain.
« I already miss you so much, my dear little brother... »
One last look. A solitary tear and ephemeral. Green eyes filled with sadness and disappointment. This was the last time Thor saw his brother. Loki let go the scepter and fell into the abyss of infinite space, disappearing into the darkness.