Baby Steps
A story about the joy and perils of peacetime, and a glimpse into post war life on the Normandy.
Two years after the destruction of the Reaper threat, and life was still on the mend. Earth was still being rebuilt, and repairs on the mass relays were still far in the future.
Galactic civilization was splintered, separated by the long distances the relays had let them avoid. Repairs were underway at Thessia, Tuchanka, Terra Nova, Rannoch, and the Sol System. QEC communications were still up for official channels, but the relay comms shutdown left most people cut off from friends and family.
The majority of the victory fleet still lived in space, working on repairs to the Citadel, and forming a culture unique to the galaxy. Merchant and cargo ships that had survived the war had left Earth, repurposing themselves into refugee camps and floating markets. Civilian ships mingled with the military, bored soldiers mingled in makeshift bars with displaced survivors.
The overwhelming joy of survival and cooperation was starting to wear off, reports of smuggling, gang activity and assaults were starting to filter through Liara's contacts across the fleet. Shepard was still heralded as the savior of the galaxy, but many surviving member's of the galaxy's criminal underbelly were starting to remember how much trouble she had given them over the years.
The crew of the Normandy lived on the fringe edge of the fleet, Joker and Cortez kept the ship moving constantly, never staying in one location for too long. Joker said it was for security, but Kaidan knew the pilot missed the adventure of open space. And so did Shepard.
She had been relieved from active duty since the end of the war, working strictly in a diplomatic role as her wounds slowly healed. Whatever Cerberus had done to her when they rebuilt her had changed the way she reacted to chemicals. Medigel, alcohol, anesthetics, and the Alliance mandated birth control. Six months after the war ended, Shepard had regained most of her strength, she and Kaidan had married, and nine months later, their son had joined the crew. Kaidan had thought Shepard would want to name him after one of the lost, something like Ash, or Anders, but the dead haunted her even more than they did him. She had named their son Felix. A name that meant happy and lucky; a wish that his life wouldn't be plagued with the sorrow that had shaped their own.
Leaning against the back of the Cortez's seat, Kaidan felt his breath catch in his chest as the Normandy swung into view out of the shuttle window. He was returning to his home ship after a long month away, back to his crew, his wife, and his son.
"Glad to be coming home, Major?" Cortez asked, glancing up at him.
"So glad." He answered, bracing himself as the shuttle landed. "That conference was only supposed to last two weeks. That's what happens when people without biotics try to standardize biotic training." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Everything is just so tense right now."
"Tell me about it." Cortez sighed as they waited for the hanger to pressurize. "I have to go pick up Shepard next. She and Tali have been meeting with the quarians for the last few days."
Kaidan paused as he reached for his bag.
"Who's been with Felix then?"
"Private Campbell watches him most of the time. She's set up a bit of a nursery in the observation deck for him and Ken and Gabby's daughter. When she needs a break, Garrus watches him."
"Garrus?"
"Yeah." Cortez laughed. "Those two are getting to be fast friends. Anyway, I'll be back with Shepard in a few minutes. Should I tell her you're on the observation deck?"
Kaidan nodded, and slung his bag over his shoulder.
"Thanks."
He jumped down off the shuttle, and headed for the lift. When he stepped into the lift, a warm, yet stilted voice greeted him.
"Welcome aboard, Major Kaidan."
"Hey!" He almost dropped his bag in surprise. "EDI?"
"Yes. Lieutenant Joker would urgently like to speak to you."
"I'm on my way."
He adjusted his bag, and hit the button for the CIC. Felix would have to wait for a moment.
When he stepped off the elevator, Traynor was waiting for him.
"Major! Welcome home. Do you want me to take your bag upstairs?"
"That would be great, thanks." He gratefully handed over his luggage, and jogged up to the cockpit. Joker spun his chair around to greet him, a huge grin on his face.
"Can you believe it?" He asked excitedly. "Tali and the Quarians finally dug out the last of EDI's sound files! They've had her running in the ship for a while, but she just started talking again last week."
Kaidan leaned against the wall behind him, and folded his arms across his chest.
"Is she... herself?"
"Not yet." A small cloud crossed over Joker's face. "She's still acting like a VI, but Tali thinks they are close to replicating some of her basic AI programming. It's still nice just to hear her voice again."
"I know how that feels." Kaidan felt a twinge in his chest. His time on the Agincourt had been the longest he had spent away from Shepard since his time in the hospital two years ago. "I'm glad she's back."
"It'll be a long time before she's really back." Joker corrected him. "But this is a small comfort."
Kaidan twisted the gold band on his finger. He had barely had time to speak to Shepard over the last month, his wedding ring the only link to his family. He knew all about small comforts.
"I know you want to go see the small fry. But I wanted to tell you about EDI myself."
Kaidan patted his friend gently on the shoulder, and made his way back to the elevator. He stretched his arms out as it carried him to the crew deck, and sighed as the doors opened.
Every time he passed the memorial wall, his stomach turned slightly. He had come so close to adding Shepard's name to it. He had held that hateful piece of metal in his hand, turned it over and over, before dropping it to the floor, refusing to add her to the list of the dead until he held her dead body in his arms. If she was never found, he wouldn't have accepted the galaxy ripping her away. He would have searched until desperation drove him to madness.
But fate had been benevolent to him again, and he had found her in the wreckage of the Citadel, barely alive, and delirious with pain. She had tried to take the Reapers down with her, never intending to live. She had sent him away to safety, knowing she was going to die. But the galaxy still needed her, death had rejected her for a second time. When he had used the last of his strength to clear the rubble that crushed her, and cradled her to his chest, her gasping breath had driven his resolve to stay by her side forever.
The memories flooded him as he stared at the wall, not just of Shepard, but of Ashley, Thane, Anderson. Comrades lost in the struggle for survival. Friends who gave everything so that he could be alive now, with Shepard, and their son.
He turned away from the wall, trying to replace the grief it cause him with the the peace of his life now. His greatest joy lay behind the door in front of him, and he strode towards it. When he stepped through the door, Private Campbell spun to look at him, a copper headed infant in her arms.
"Major!"
"At ease, Private." Campbell nodded, adjusted her grip on the baby, and looked at the floor by the large window.
"Felix! Look who's here!"
Kaidan stepped around the couch, and grinned. The small figure sat at the window, fingers and nose pressed against the glass. Kaidan felt himself melt as he approached, every worry he had ever had falling away from him. He knelt down, and placed his hand on the child's back. Dark eyes turned to look up at him, and a galaxy of freckles mirrored the stars outside the window.
"Da." The boy said, grinning up at him. Kaidan swooped him up into his arms, trying unsuccessfully to keep the tiny grasping fingers out of his hair. "Hey now!" He laughed, trying to control the squirming baby. Behind him, the door hissed open again.
"Looks like you need a hand containing this situation, Major." He turned, and reached out with his free hand to pull Shepard into a warm hug. She nestled herself against his chest, her cheek resting against his collarbone.
"Situation is manageable, Commander." He murmured into her hair. "Everything is perfect."
He let his mind clear, all thoughts of politics, the war, lost friends fading away as he held Shepard, his Shepard, tightly with one arm, and his infant son in the other. The dreams he had had about Shepard ever since he had met her and fallen hard... none of them compared to the reality of that moment. He kissed her warmly, trying to ignore Felix squirming in his grip.
"Maamamama!" He wailed, his small arms flailing. Shepard laughed, and broke out of the kiss to plant a small one on her son's forehead.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw an embarrassed Campbell trying to make herself invisible. He stepped back, and passed Felix into his mother's arms. She kissed her son on the head, held him tightly as his small fingers played with the cords on her dress uniform, and she laughed.
"Curious little monster." As she adjusted him in her arms, Kaidan noticed what Felix was wearing.
"Campbell, where did you find a N7 baby jumper?"
"I made it out of one of Vega's t-shirts. Those things are gigantic." She smiled, and watched as Shepard set the baby down. Felix grasped the edge of a nearby shelf, and struggled to pull himself up. When he succeeded, he turned to grin up at his parents with triumph.
"When did he start doing that?" Kaidan asked, kneeling down again.
"A few weeks ago." Shepard answered. "He's getting stronger."
"Still no sign of biotics?"
She shook her head.
"Liara said they would have started manifesting by now. I think we are in the clear."
Kaidan felt a slight twinge of disappointment, part of him wanted to teach Felix how to use biotics, to have the legacy of his own powers shared with his son. But that slight twinge was outweighed by relief, there would be no defects, no cancer, no migraines for his son. He reached out, and grabbed a small stuffed hanar off the couch with his powers, slowly floating it over Felix's head, and down into the child's arms. The child sat heavily, giggling happily as he hugged his toy.
"Commander, if you want to go unpack, I can keep Felix here. Ken is coming to pick up Maisie, he and Gabby are taking her with them on their leave. I'm going to go sleep after they do, but Garrus said he'd take over for me."
"Thank you, Private." Shepard said gratefully, taking Kaidan's hand, and leading him to the lift. They stood quietly, nodding greetings to the crew as they passed.
"It's funny..." Shepard muttered under her breath. "We're married. We have a son. Everyone knows, and no one cares. But there are times I still feel like we're sneaking around."
"Like on the SR-1?" They both paused as they remembered the two months of stolen moments in elevators, "strategy meetings" in the comm room, and lingering glances exchanged during missions. The last happy time they had had together for two years.
"Just like the SR-1." Shepard agreed. "It's stupid, I know."
"No, I get what you mean. We still have to act like professionals, and even though we haven't had to act like soldiers in two years, we might have to."
She nodded as they stepped onto the lift.
"I'm glad you're home, though. The Normandy has never been the same without you on it." She grinned up at him.
The moment the elevator doors closed behind them, Kaidan grabbed Shepard around the waist and pulled her in tightly for a deep kiss. As her hands made their way from his neck to his hair, he fumbled with buttons of her jacket. When they finally came free, he slipped his hand under the heavy material, feeling the comforting warmth of her skin. He barely noticed the doors opening on the top floor, only Shepard's directional tugs led him into the small hallway. She kept her eyes on him as she backed into their cabin.
What had once been her lonely office had turned into a small family home, a corner dedicated to Felix's crib and toys, small gifts from the crew that had welcomed the Normandy's first baby.
Standing at the bottom of their stairs, they paused their embrace to catch their breath. Helping her slip out of her jacket, Kaidan lightly traced a scar on her arm with the tip of his finger.
"I hated being away so long." He said, with a sigh. "I hate being away from you and Felix." Shepard nodded, her hair falling in front of her face. He reached up, and tucked it back behind her ear. She had grown it out since the end of the war, it was now long enough to braid just past her shoulders, but even the tightest braid couldn't contain the strands that wanted to break free.
Wordlessly, she slid her fingers around his waist, gently tugging at the edge of his shirt. He lifted it up and over his head, before helping Shepard with her own. The rest of her scars shone in the light, pale against her skin. His fingers ran down the familiar paths around her waist, and as they circled around her, he lifted her off the ground, letting her pull her legs up to rest against his hips.
He sat back onto the bed, and rolled over, gently tucking Shepard's body underneath his. She ran her hands through his hair again, gently twisting a curl in her fingers, and he stared down at her.
Even through all their history, through all the times he had thought her to be hurt, traitorous, or dead, and through all the times he had held her, kissed her, loved her... he still couldn't believe she was real. In the month they had been separated, he had woken in the night, drenched in sweat, believing he had imagined the whole thing, and she was dead on the Citadel, buried under the rubble of the Reaper's destruction. Only the band of gold he wore pulled him back to reality. Shepard loved him, waited for him. Lived.
She stared up at him curiously, obviously confused by the pause in the moment.
"Everything alright?"
He nodded, and bent his head down against her's.
"Everything's perfect."
An hour later, Shepard slid towards the edge of the bed, and groaned.
"We should probably go rescue Garrus."
"From what?" Kaidan said, fighting off a yawn. "Cortez said he likes watching Felix."
"Yeah, but Tali wanted to talk to him." She frowned.
"Things didn't go well with the flotilla?"
"No. The quarians want to leave." Shepard pulled herself into a clean uniform. Kaidan stood up and followed suit. "They are used to long voyages, and living on their ships. They want to leave. Head for Rannoch."
"But they make almost all of the Dextro food..." Kaidan's voice trailed off. "Oh."
"Yeah. The turian's are not happy at all."
She took Kaidan's hand, twining her fingers through his, and they headed down to the crew deck.
As they stepped off the lift, Garrus's voice carried around the corner.
"Tali, I understand your people want to get back, ow, to Rannoch, ow, but their technical skills, not to mention, ow, the food production is too precious to the fleet!"
Whatever Tali was going to say was cut off by their arrival; she, Garrus and Liara turned to look up at them. Felix sat on the table in front of Garrus, the little fingers that had previously tried to grab Kaidan's hair were making desperate attempts at the turian's mandibles.
Liara reached over, and slid the boy off the table and onto her lap, ignoring the small squeal of protest.
"There, Garrus." She said with a shake of her head. "Now you two can resume fighting without a distraction." She reached up with a free hand, and gave Kaidan's arm a welcoming squeeze as he and Shepard sat down next to her.
Tali nodded and them, and turned back to Garrus.
"My people are not the IT department of the fleet that can just be ordered around!" She folded her arms across her chest. "We've been helping restore the VI systems and EDI out of our own kindness, and desire to get things back to normal. But we don't want things to go back to normal for us. We want to go home."
Garrus glanced awkward across the table, then looked at his hands.
"This is your home."
"Garrus..." Tali reached over with a gloved hand, and placed it on his knee. "We never knew it would go this far..."
His own taloned fingered rested on her shoulder, and they stared at each other, letting the silence fill the room. Liara shifted Felix onto her hip, and gestured with her head. They stood, and quietly followed her into her office.
The asari sat down on the edge of her bed, Felix resting his head on her shoulder.
"They've been fighting about this ever since you got back. When she told him the quarians wanted to leave, everything went downhill." She said to Shepard. "I don't know how I can help."
Shepard stared up at the oppressing number of screens on Liara's wall.
"Don't you have enough to do?"
"Traynor has been helping me. She is quite talented as an analyst. And I want to make sure conflict on my own ship is resolved, as well as conflict in the fleet." She turned her gaze to Kaidan. "What happened at the conference? I thought it was supposed to be two weeks long."
Kaidan sighed, and pulled up a chair. Shepard sat down next to Liara, and tried to smooth down Felix's curls.
"There are some people in the Alliance who wanted to create one place for all biotics to train, have one standardized way of teaching." He ran his hands through his hair and continued. "Take kids away from family that had just survived the largest war our civilization has ever seen. Displace refugees that had just found places to settle down again. Not allow for special instructions, learning curves."
Shepard whistled under her breath.
"Like when they took you away to Jump Zero?"
"Exactly like that."
"But they listened to you, right? You're the highest ranking surviving biotic in the military!"
"Well... They did listen to me. The whole thing would have been over on time, but we had a guest speaker who was a bit more... controversial."
"Jack." Liara said, and covered her face with her hand. Felix took the opportunity to wriggle out of her lap onto the bed. Shepard plucked him up, and cradled him tightly.
"Yeah."
"How long did it take to subdue her?" Shepard asked.
"About a week. She wasn't violent-"
"That's new."
"But she was very, very angry."
"It's a sore subject for her." Shepard sighed, gently rocking back and forth. "I saw Pragia. What they did there. She's just afraid of that happening to other kids."
"I know. It just threw a wrench into things. But it did help. Eventually. They are going to train instructors, who will then set up all over. Jack is going to help me oversee their training." He leaned back in the chair, and watched Liara watch Felix. "What do you know about the quarian situation? Are they really going to leave?"
"I don't know much more than Shepard does." The asari grabbed a datapad off a nearby desk. "I do know the fleet is more divided than they appear."
"How so?" Shepard stopped rocking, and lowered her voice.
"Well, they all want to go back to Rannoch." Liara noticed Felix falling asleep, and spoke softly. "But many of them want to stay with the main fleet until the relays are repaired."
"How long are they saying now?" Kaidan asked.
"Official reports say at least eight more years." A tight smile spread across Liara's face as she scrolled through her datapad. "But I had reports that say it may be completed in five."
"What?" Shepard's mouth fell open. "How are they going to knock off three years?"
Liara bit her lip.
"Some technique the quarian's invented. I'm not sure what is it though."
"Why do they want to leave, if their presence will speed up the repair process?" Kaidan wondered out loud.
"I don't know that yet, either. But give me time, and I will."
"As long as it doesn't take too long. This could tear apart the fleet, and this ship." Shepard said, gently standing up, and passing Felix to Kaidan. "Can you take him upstairs and put him to bed? I'll be up as soon as I calm Garrus and Tali down."
Kaidan nodded, and carried his sleeping son out of the office, and up towards their cabin. He tried to lay him in his crib, but Felix had a tight grip on his shirt. With a sigh, Kaidan gently lowered himself onto the bed, resting Felix against his chest. The child sighed contentedly, and shifted in his sleep. Running his fingers through the dark curls, Kaidan felt his eyes struggle to stay open. He hadn't even realized he had fallen asleep until Shepard curled up next to him, Felix tucked between them.
"My boys." She whispered, stretching her head up for a quick kiss.
"How's Tali? Did you get things sorted with her and Garrus?"
"Not yet. She's as torn as the migrant fleet is."
Kaidan carefully rolled himself towards her, taking care to keep Felix steady.
"What do you mean?"
"She still won't admit it, but she wants to be with Garrus. She keeps telling him that it's a fling, but it's been going on for two years now. It's more that that. But she wants to get back to Rannoch. She wants what the she and quarians fought so hard for." Shepard sighed, and slowly scooped Felix up off the bed. "And Garrus wants this. What we have."
"A marriage? To Tali?"hree
"A family." She set Felix in his crib and returned to the bed. As soon as he realized he was alone, the child let out a small whimper. Kaidan sent a small surge of his biotics out, gently turning the mobile of ships over the crib. As they clicked gently, the noises of distress faded.
"He loves Felix like an uncle," Shepard continued. "But he wants kids of his own."
"And that can't happen with Tali."
"No." Shepard said sadly, curling her body against his. "It can't."
As she drifted to sleep, Kaidan stroked her arm with his finger, enjoying her warmth, her softness. For the first time in a month, he was with his family, and his sleep was untroubled.
The next morning, Shepard was missing from the bed, and Felix's crib was empty. Kaidan unconciously felt for his ring, breathing deeply as he ran his thumb over it. On the desk they shared, a datapad blinked at him.
"Kaidan,
Liara, Tali and I are going over to the Migrant Fleet to gather more information, then we are hitting the market. Garrus has Felix.
Home in a few hours.
Love you.
Yours always.
-Shepard"
When he got down to the crew deck, Garrus and Vega sat at the mess table, Felix in a makeshift highchair between them. The large lieutenant was feeding the boy, making fighter noises as he waved a spoon of food in the air. Apparently he was reinacting an intense battle, more food was ending up on Felix and Garrus than was getting eaten. Kaidan laughed, and pulled up a chair on the other side of the table.
"Hey, James. When did you get back from leave?"
"A few hours ago." A glob of food slipped off the spoon and landed on the table, much to Felix's delight. "Hit up the bar they built on the Atuin, then did a little shopping." He handed the spoon over to a scowling Garrus, who started properly feeding Felix. "Now that Earth is pretty well cleaned up, there is a huge market set up for pre-war stuff that's getting scavenged. I got Little Loco a present."
He dug through a small sack, and triumphantly pulled out a small toy Hanar. Kaidan shook his head.
"Vega, did you get my son a Blasto action figure?"
"Yup." He grinned. "When I was guarding Lola, I made her watch all the movies. I told her I was gonna get her one, but then... well... Reapers and shit. Finally making good on my promise."
He handed the figure to Felix, who giggled wildly.
Kaidan set his elbows on the table, and leaned forward, staring intently at Garrus.
"Is everything okay? You don't seem like yourself."
Garrus looked away sheepishly, then brought his gaze back to meet Kaidan's.
"Part of me misses the fight. The danger, the excitement. Even when I worked at C-Sec, and spent most of my time doing paperwork, there was still the the chance for a chase, or a shootout." He sighed and picked up a napkin. "I helped Shepard storm the collector's base through the Omega-4 relay. We took London on foot through the worst of the wra. And now what am I? A glorified babysitter. And there are only so many ways to calibrate a gun that isn't getting used." He gently started wiping food off Felix's face.
"There's more, isn't there?" Kaidan watched the turian's long talons delicately go about their task. "You wouldn't watch Felix if you didn't want to, and Shepard wouldn't let you if she didn't trust you."
"Yeah, she won't let me watch him again." Vega chimed in.
"That's because you let the robodog drag him around the hanger deck on a tool cart while you took a nap."
"Oh. Right."
"Look, Shepard told me about what's going on with you and Tali."
"Great." Garrus lifted Felix out of his chair, and set him on his lap. The boy curled against him, tucking his small fingers into a gap in Garrus's shirt. Garrus smiled, and gently smoothed his hair down. "Yeah, the interspecies romance thing is a lot more difficult that I had originally planned on."
"Well, that was bound to come up eventually. I would have thought you guys had talked about it earlier." James scratched his head.
"We did."
"Then what's the issue?"
Garrus didn't answer, instead choosing to take the Blasto figure from Felix and awkwardly walk it across the table. Kaidan felt his heart sink.
"It's the kids thing, isn't it." He asked quietly.
Garrus continued his silence, but his grip on Felix tightened.
"There have to be a ton of war orphans though." Vega wrinkled his forehead. "Little turians and quarians who need nice dextro parents and stuff."
"I mentioned that." Garrus said under his breath.
"It didn't go over well?"
"She didn't think I was being serious. She said we weren't going to go over to the migrant fleet and pick out an orphan like a pet."
"Ouch."
"I don't know." Garrus sighed, and handed Felix back the Blasto figure. "I always assumed after some time on the Citadel I'd go back to Palavan. Find a girl. Settle down."
"I think we all had that plan at one point." Kaidan leaned back in his chair, the distant memories of Rahna and BAaT flickering at the back of his mind.
"Yeah." Garrus stood up, and walked around the table, handing Felix back to his father. "I guess there's nothing I can do right now. If the migrant fleet leaves, she's going to to go with them. We just have to wait." He stretched his arms out. "I'm going back to bed, now that you're up to watch Felix." He nodded a farewell, and disappeared towards the elevator. He and Tali had taken over the room left empty when Diana Allers had finally departed.
Felix squirmed in Kaidan's grip, his short legs kicking.
"You need exercize, little man." Vega called across the table.
Kaidan gently lowered his son to the floor, holding his hands tightly. He stood behind him, leaning forward to support Felix as he made his way awkwardly across the floor.
"He's getting pretty good at that." Vega commented. "Pretty soon, we'll have to put a tracker on him."
"Yeah. I'm starting to wonder what's going to happen when he get's older." They turned, ready to head back to the table. "This is a warship, after all. It isn't a place to raise a family. What if we go back to active duty?"
Vega shrugged.
"Head back to Earth?"
"You and I both know Shepard won't settle down."
"Well, then I guess we start teaching Little Loco how to defend himself as soon as he's ready."
Kaidan looked down at his son and felt his heart ache. Felix grinned up at him, his grip tight on his fingers. The last thing he wanted to imagine was his child armed, fighting, dying.
He lifted Felix up into his arms, swinging him around as he did.
"We'll just deal with that when it comes up."
"Major Kaidan." EDI's voice called over the comms. "Commander Shepard, Admiral Tali and Doctor Liara have returned."
"Um, thanks, EDI."
"Man." Vega cracked his knuckles. "That's going to take some getting used to."
"No kidding."
The elevator doors opened, and the women rushed out, Tali in the middle.
"Get Garrus-" Shepard started, but Tali interrupted her.
"No! Not yet." They bolted into the med bay, and helped Tali onto a cot. There was an emergency clamp on her arm, a temporary seal in her suit against infections. Kaidan handed Felix to Vega, then grabbed Shepard's arm and pulled her to the side.
As he held her arms, he frantically looked her over, checking for any injury.
"What the hell happened?"
"Something stupid." She wiggled an arm free from his grip, and wiped her forehead.
"What do you mean?"
"Someone apparently has been holding a grudge for a long time, and thought I had gone soft." She sighed, and leaned against him. "Maybe I have. He managed to get a shot off before I hit him." She turned towards Tali.
"How is it, Doc?"
Doctor Chawkas scanned the clamp, checking the seal against the suit.
"It looks like you got it on in time. Tali, you should really only feel slightly under the weather for the next few days, nothing serious."
"Can I call Garrus up now?" Liara asked, arms folded across her chest. Tali nodded, and the asari stepped over to the comm system.
"I just... didn't want him to worry." Tali said, her head sagging.
"He's going to anyway." Kaidan told her. "That's what happens."
"I know." She said, quietly.
Garrus arrived moments later, and pulled Tali against his chest, hugging her tightly as he checked her arm.
The crew left the med bay, letting Tali and Garrus have the privacy they needed.
"So now what happens?" Vega said, sitting back down at the table. He still held Felix, the baby tiny in his arms. "Are we back on duty?"
"I'm not sure." Shepard admitted. "I think we might be."
"Shepard..." Kaidan protested. "What happened to diplomatic roles? Raising a family? Settling down?"
"Kaidan, I would love to do all those things." She leaned on the table, rubbing her temples gently. "But someone I pissed off years ago just sent someone to try and kill me in the middle of a refugee market. It was so long ago, and such a small slight that I don't even remember who this guy is. Do you know how many people I've pissed off that I do remember?"
"Yeah."
"If we settle down in one place, sooner or later, they're going to find us. I know you are more than capable of defending yourself, but what about our son?" She gestured across the table to the bright eyes that stared back. "The Normandy is the safest place for him. And we need to reteach the galaxy that we are not people to be fucked with."
"Hackett will want to know."
"He already does. He's figuring out exactly what we are going to be doing. He should be contacting us in the next few days."
A silence settled over the table as that sunk in. The time of peace was coming to a close, and things were going back to the way they had always been.
"Speaking of diplomatic roles," Liara added, sitting down on Shepard's other side. "We did find out why the quarians want to leave."
"What? Why?" Kaidan asked.
"They have made a breakthrough with the relays. But they want to go home and fix the one closest to Rannoch first."
"Without telling anyone else?"
Liara nodded.
"They figure by the time they get to Rannoch going FTL, the rest of the galaxy will be fairly close to finishing the main relays. They will just be behind by a year or two."
"Why-" Kaidan started, then shook his head. "There isn't a QEC communicator on Rannoch, is there."
"No. They have no way of contacting the other half of their species. They know nothing of what's happening on Rannoch. We don't know if whatever that pulse from the Citadel did anything to the Geth there."
"It got as far as Terra Nova." Kaidan added. "Not that there were any Geth there, but they are still rebuilding their VI's."
"The Asari are making progress with their relay, although a large group of them have moved on to another... stranger project. We overheard some of them talking about it at the market."
Shepard buried her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking gently.
"Oh no." Kaidan muttered. "Is this what I think it is?"
Shepard nodded, still laughing.
"What?" Vega asked with confusion.
"Apparently they finally convinced Javik to continue the line of the Protheans." Liara said with a sigh.
"What?" Vega asked again.
"Half Asari, Half Protheans."
"Oh. Oh!" His eyes widened. "That's weird."
"No it's not." Liara said indignantly. "That's how my species functions!"
"Is it working?" Kaidan interrupted. Shepard nodded again, picking her head up from the table.
"Yeah. A few of them had their kids with them."
"How do they look?"
Shepard thought for a moment.
"Grumpy."
Vega wrinkled his nose.
"So Buggy is living on an asari ship with his own harem?"
"Looks like it."
"Huh."
As the conversation wound down again, they all turned to watch Tali and Garrus come out of the med bay.
"I'm going to stay." She said quietly. "Even if the migrant fleet leaves. My place is here." She linked her fingers through Garrus's. "With my family."
Shepard's face broke into a wicked grin.
"Well, since you've decided to stay, here's the good news. We're going back into active duty."
"What?" Through her mask, Tali's eyes widened in shock. "Is it too late to change my mind."
"Yes." Garrus said, tugging her closer. "You're stuck."
She sighed.
"Great. It was getting boring around here anyway. And I did promise Joker I would keep working on EDI."
"Hey, Commander?" Joker's voice rang out. "Admiral Hackett just called. We are going to be docking with the Agincourt, and taking on a few more marines for security."
"Sounds like a plan." She replied, stepping over to the comm controls. "Then get us back out to the edge of the fleet again. I don't like being surrounded."
"Me neither."
Shepard walked around to the other edge of the table, and plucked Felix out of Vega's arms. She shifted him onto her hip, and stared at her crew, stepping back over to the wall.
"Joker?"
"Yeah?"
"Can you patch me through to the whole ship?"
"Done."
"Alright, everyone. We aren't going back to war, but we've got some people gunning for us. We're also probably going to piss off even more people in the process of dealing with the first group of people. The game hasn't changed, we do what we've always done. Survive. Win." She hugged her son tightly. "The fate of the galaxy isn't riding on us now, but we can't let the fleet tear itself apart in violence." She sighed. "We just have to get through the next ten years, till the relays get fixed, and people will spread back out. Things get close in tight quarters, but we just have to make it through. I don't know what's going to happen, but the crew of this ship is my family, and I am not going to let anything happen to anyone."
She cut the line, and walked over to Kaidan. They walked away from the rest of the crew, slipping into the observation deck.
"I'm sorry." She said quietly, sitting down on the couch. "I know you wanted to get out of the mess the military had left of our lives. But that just isn't the reality of our situation."
"I know." He ruffled Felix's hair. "We just have to figure out how to get him educated. Keep him from going stir crazy on this ship as he grows up. How to keep him safe."
She set Felix on the ground, and handed him his stuffed hanar.
"We just have to take every day as it comes." She sighed. "He's going to grow up on this ship, possibly with just Ken and Gabby's daughter as a friend. I don't know how many other kids will show up, now that we're getting back into things."
Kaidan settled into the couch, and Shepard leaned against him.
"Ken and Gabby's kid." He repeated. "God, can you imagine-"
"Oh god no." Shepard laughed. "Let's cross our fingers Felix meets a nice person who doesn't have a crazy engineer for a father."
"Well, you've just described over half of the fleet. That doesn't leave the poor kid much to go on."
As if he knew he was being talked about, Felix turned around and grinned at them, before gripping the edge of the couch and hauling himself up. Shepard went to reach for him, but Kaidan grabbed her hand.
"Wait. Let's see what he does."
Felix stared at them, then slowly turned himself towards the windows. He let go of the couch, clapped his hands, and took three uncertain steps before sitting down.
"Has he ever done that before?" Kaidan asked slowly, and Shepard shook her head.
"No. That's new."
They watched Felix crawl towards the window, dragging his hanar with him. Shepard laughed.
"What is it with you two and that window?"
"What?"
"After you got out of the hospital, every time I came down here, you were staring out there." She waved a hand out the window.
"I don't know what he sees out there. Maybe he likes watching the ships." As if to prove his point, the Normandy wove its way through the cluster of the fleet as it neared the Agincourt at the very center. "When I would look out there, it was empty. Peaceful."
"You thought it was peaceful? Even when we were running from the Reapers?"
"Well, no. They were always out there... lurking. But there is something calming about the emptiness of space."
Felix stared out the window, his tiny face pressed against the glass.
"I bet he's going to be a pilot." Shepard said. "Growing up out here... living on this ship..."
"It makes me a bit sad though. I wish we could have raised him on the ground. Even one of the colonies, if not Earth."
"I know." Sadness crept into Shepard's voice. "Believe me. I wanted everything to be normal. Have a little house. Actual privacy. Sunshine."
"He hasn't seen that yet, has he?"
"No. He hasn't. We've never actually taken him off the Normandy. This place is his entire world."
"No wonder he just wants to look at other ships."
They waited as the Agincourt loomed into view, the flagship of the Alliance Navy sharing its airspace with the Destiny Ascension, both slowly orbiting the rebuilding of the Citadel. Shepard shivered as they cruised past the star shaped station, and Kaidan wrapped his arms around her tightly.
After her long recovery, she had sworn never again to set foot there. Just the sight of it brought back trauma for her, she turned her face away, burying it in Kaidan's chest. Soldiers with PTSD were common after the war, very few people had made it through completely intact, mentally and physically.
As they docked, Shepard stood up and grabbed Felix.
"Alright, little man. You ready to go greet the Admiral?" Felix wrinkled his nose at her, reaching down towards his hanar. Kaidan handed to him, and followed his family to the elevator.
Admiral Hackett was waiting for them by the galaxy map, six marines behind him, a pile of duffel bags off to the side.
"Commander Shepard. Major Alenko." He nodded as they saluted. "Young man." He very solemnly shook Felix's tiny hand. "He get's bigger every time I see him."
Shepard handed him over to Kaidan.
"He is growing quickly." She looked past the Admiral. "Are these our new marines?"
"Yes. After the incident today, I want to make sure security on board the Normandy is a top priority. Your crew is highly trained, but a few extra bodies never hurt the odds."
"Understood."
Kaidan felt all eyes on himself and Felix, and knew what everyone was thinking. If anyone really wanted to get to Shepard, killing him, and taking Felix was the best way to do it.
"Now, Commander, I understand you want to get back into things, but the nature of the galaxy has changed in the last two years. Our security forces are mostly dealing with smuggling, petty crimes. That's not exactly your area of expertise."
"Admiral, I want to find out who sent that man after me today. Why he thinks he can openly try and have me killed. Put refugees and civilians in danger."
Hackett nodded.
"Whoever it is does pose a serious danger to the fleet. Just keep me informed of what you find." He nodded at Kaidan. "Major, anything to add?"
Kaidan swallowed hard.
"Just, Sir, a word in private?" Hackett nodded, and they headed back towards the airlock. The Admiral stopped in the small hallway, and turned to face him.
"Yes?"
"I'll be suiting up with Shepard, Sir. We're a team." He gave Felix a slight squeeze. "Just... if anything happens to us..."
"The boy will be safe." Hackett looked down at Felix, his eyes serious. "I'll take him aboard the Agincourt myself if I feel the Normandy is no longer secure."
"Thank you."
"Dismissed, Major."
Kaidan shifted Felix to his other arm and saluted. Shepard came up behind him, and watched the Admiral leave.
"What was that about?"
"Contingency plan."
They stood in the small hallway, leaning against each other as the Normandy shuddered.
"Joker?" Shepard called.
"Yeah?"
"Before we get back into the fray, let's take a short detour."
"Aye aye, Ma'am. Where do you want to go?"
Shepard kissed Felix on the head, then grinned up at Kaidan.
"Earth."