Exploding, Food and Germany!

Episode 1: The Exploding Candy Bar!

1 month ago...

Ludwig went home after training with Feliciano and Kiku. "I'm so hungry. I want some wurst and beer." Then the German saw a plate of wurst and beer. He sat down and ate the wurst and drank the beer. After cleaning, he called his big brother, Gilbert Beilsmhidt.

"The awesome me is here and speaking. Well, West?"

"Yes. I just want to say... well... thank you for the wurst and beer you left me."

Gilbert just went, "Wait, what did you just say?"

"I said, thank you for the wurst you gave me."

"West, I didn't leave you anything. But for now, I need YOUR help."

Then Ludwig asked, "Why?" His brother responded, "Well, a girl named Elizabeta is chasing me right now with a frying pan. I just locked the back door with as many locks as I can. I need to find a way to calm her down before she destroys all of the 9 locks, breaks down the door, and kills me. The only way I can think of that might calm down that wild Hungarian is to make her favorite dessert. But do we even have all the ingredients to actually MAKE the dobos torte?" he asked him.

Ludwig was about to answer to his brother, but all of a sudden, his stomach growled. Then he felt a pain in his stomach. "Wait... Gilbert, I have to go!" and so, Ludwig went to the bathroom and, well, let's just say he got really sick. And as for Gilbert...

February 14!

"I am definitely going to confront Alfred about this," Ludwig said, while fuming over the fact that Alfred gave him spoiled sausages and beer that expired in 1700. He found out with eavesdropping on a conversation Alfred had with Matthew.

Immediately, Gilbert knew why his brother was fuming. "Read this book!" he said, and gave his brother a book titled "Pranks by the Awesome Me!" which was a book that had Gilbert reading the book as a cover. Ludwig asked, "Why do you have a published book?" "Just read page 217, paragraph 4. It has pranks related to food." Gilbert replied. So Ludwig read page 217 out loud:

If you want to prank someone using food and/or drinks, it will depend on what food and/or drink the person likes.

*Note that you make sure you have an awesome common sense. Don't do this to people unless you're sure you don't kill the person, get arrested, and/or get beaten up by somebody who really cares for the victim. Especially if you're doing this to an Austrian! You can even get killed yourself, usually by a Hungarian going ballistic and uses a cast-iron frying pan in an attempt to kill you or by causing an explosion, poisoning, etc. I should not give those types of people ideas to do so, so I should stop so I won't become less awesome because I caused you, your victim, and/or other bystander(s)' deaths and/or injuries. But still, don't blame me. I'm way too awesome!*

Here are examples: Beer, soda, candy, burgers, sausages, pasta, sushi, ice cream, scones, (if you're a horrible cook who is from England then you just cook it and serve it!) etc.


Ludwig knew that Alfred liked chocolate, so here's what he came up with: a candy bar filled with unstable explosives. If somebody broke off a piece or bit the candy, it would explode. Gilbert commented that it's a good way to keep Halloween candy safe and maybe even tell Elizabeta about it. But he also was a bit worried that the Hungarian would do just that to him.

He made the candy bar and started to Alfred's house. However, Feliciano saw him with the chocolate and rushed over to him. "Ooh, Ludwig, Ludwig, is that for me? Thank you! It's so nice of you to bring me a Valentine's Day gift!" Feliciano exclaimed.

Then he took the bar and kissed Ludwig on the cheek. He carefully unwrapped the chocolate bar. Ludwig screamed, "WAIT, FELICIANO, THAT-CANDY-BAR-ISN'T-FOR-YOU-IN-FACT-IT'S-AN-EXPL-" but it was too late. Feliciano bit the chocolate.

One big fat explosion spreading out that could send anyone to the hospital in a five-mile-radius later...

At the hospital...

"I told you not to eat it!" Ludwig scolded to Feliciano, who like him, was in a hospital bed. "Oww... Ludwig, please help me..." Feliciano groaned."Oi, West. Make that dobos torte for Liz and tell her I told you to make that."

Gilbert said, also in a hospital bed "I already knew," a voice said. "Liz?" The three said. "Did you really have to push me into a sewer? Why?" she asked."We were being chased by criminals, and you had to hide somewhere! I hid in a garbage can! ... Fine! I'll make you a dobos torte and give you jewelry, a frying pan and even a ring to beg for your stupid forgiveness! Now are you happy?" Gilbert frowned. "Uh, you don't have to do that. Just tell me you're sorry and that's it," Elizabeta said.

"But I guess you can also give me something even sweeter than those gifts... Wait, did I just say that out loud?" Ludwig smiled at that comment the Hungarian made and Feliciano was smiling and was about to talk, but Ludwig interrupted by saying that if he's quiet he can eat pasta whenever he wants for a year.

Gilbert answered anyway. "You don't need to apologize. I knew you wouldn't resist the awesome me! But, if you really want to, I'll talk to Francis and then give you my gift... or should I say gifts?" Feliciano sung, "You can give it now!"

"Feliciano, my brother's in a bed, so how can he give somebody a gift?" Ludwig said. "Don't worry; as soon as I feel awesome again, I'll be able to. You should have never gone out with that stupid aristocrat! He even ditched you on your birthday just to play his piano concert! You need something awesome, and I can help you with that!" and Gilbert gave a thumbs up to a smiling Elizabeta.

"Fine... but if it's a prank, then I am going to get a frying pan and try it out on you!" she said. But then Alfred came to see them. "Hey, Gil! Oh, there's Liz! I thought she hated Gil! Guess I was wrong! Hey there, Feli! And... Ludwig... look, dude, I'm sorry for giving you those spoiled snacks. How was I supposed to know if they were expired or not?"

"Here's some advice. READ THE EXPIRATION DATE!" Ludwig snapped.

And so, after a month or so, Gilbert recovered, and for once, kept his promise and gave Elizabeta the gifts.

Ludwig recovered, and promised not to make explosive chocolate ever again, while Alfred promised that he will check that whatever foods he gives to someone is not expired, spoiled, poisoned, or damaged in any way.

Ludwig kept this promise, along with the promise for Feliciano: he gave a supply of pasta for Feliciano to eat that would last a year. Alfred often made Matthew read the expiration date, but sometimes read the expiration date himself.


Sorry for the AusxHun fans, no offense, but that pairing just doesn't stir up with me! I once tried being a fan of former, but I ended up going back with the latter, PruxHun. Sorry! : P

Deep question: How many PruxHun fans are there in the world (or at least in either America or Japan)? You should just estimate.

BTW, I got this idea in a book I read. The book talked about really bad candy ideas in the food chapter. In World War II, Germany designed an explosive covered with a layer of chocolate. If somebody broke off a piece (or bit it), then KABOOM! An explosion.

Finally, I'm making another chapter with the character...

*SHOT!* Sorry, you'll have to guess! But here's a hint: I wish this character was on Hetalia (but it isn't...)