Rating: PG
Author: Emma
Date: January 20, 1999
Feedback: RVoyager@juno.com
Summary: Missing thoughts from "Gigolo Jarod" It's Jarod's turn now!
Disclaimer: I don't own Jarod and Miss Parker. The crazy folks at NBC Entertainment do.
Jarod paced around his hotel room restlessly. He wondered absently if Miss Parker had gotten his present yet. Suddenly the door monitor he had installed at Miss Parker's house chimed. And although he knew it was weird to keep tabs on her like that, he couldn't help it.
*At least I don't have a surveillance camera in her shower or anything,* he reasoned to himself.
He also knew that it would be counter-productive. How could he help people if he sat home all day staring at a television screen?
He abruptly forced his thoughts off the lovely visual that created and dialed her number. He knew what her standard greeting would be.
"What?"
He smiled at her never-failing response, "They say 'tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." He turned the postcard from Joyce over sadly, knowing he would never be on a first, never mind a second honeymoon with the woman he loved. "Do you believe that's true?"
"If you're lonely call a 900 number."
*Only if you're the operator...*
"Did you read my book?"
"I skimmed through it. You paint a pretty sad picture."
*And don't you wonder if I draw from memory or imagination.* He smiled. *Wouldn't she like to know.*
"I just write the way I see it." He paused again, "How did we end up like this?"
"Like what?"
*Apart from each other,* he answered silently before voicing a different response, "Alone. Searching. It's ironic because we both want the same things: someone to care about...someone to care about us."
*At least, I think we both want each other. Sometimes I am so absolutely sure and then other times, you have me completely confused.*
"Do you think we'll ever find that kind of love in our lives?" he asked.
"What the hell do you want from me Jarod?"
*You! That's all I've ever wanted from you.*
He sighed deeply. She wasn't going to get it. She just wasn't ready.
"Just open the box."
He hung up the phone and slowly pushed the antenna back in. Whether she just refused to acknowledge his suggestions or if she really didn't understand was a mystery to him. He leaned back on the bed, still alone and still apart from all he really wanted in the world.
Finis