"What. The. Fucking. Hell. Did you do to me?" Alfred, er.. Alicia screamed into the heavens, spouting every curse known to man. Because, some mother freaking bitch, turned him into a girl, boobs and all that, and deserted him..uh, her somewhere on a remote, profound island nation.
Alicia decided to test out this new body of hers, and sure it had its ups and downs. She couldn't run as fast or punch as hard, but she definitely had the "oh my sexy babe" appeal covered, with boobs one size larger than Ukraine's and wavy golden blonde hair scattered across her shoulders. Aly, which was what she'd decided to be called from now on, looked around herself to see kelly green mountains and a sea of sapphire.
Suddenly, as quick as a flash of lightning, a girl—Seychelles tapped her on the shoulder.
"Excuse me, are you new here? Or have I met you somewhere before?"
"I'm um... Alicia, can I entrust you with a secret?"
"Sure!" Seychelles merrily chirped, enlightening Alicia.
"I um.. well..." Alicia glanced around to see no one in sight and then continued.
"I was-am-are America."
"Who's America? Or are you one of the Americas?"
"I'm America! The United States of America!"
"So you are the representative everyone's been looking for! The nation in between Canada and Mexico!"
"You don't remember me? We met at more that a dozen world meetings!"
"World meetings? Wow, you're already so advanced!"
"Never mind that. Could I use your cell phone for a sec?"
"What's a cell phone? What's a "phone"?"
Oh crap. Oh freaking mother of hell something is completely screwed up-crap.
"Could I use your laptop? Or any portable, wifi connected, electronic device?"
Seychelles looked more puzzled by the moment and then came up with the exclamation,
"What most different clothing, tell me what is it like in America?"