Heart of the Ocean

Brown hair blew in the wind, bangs gently touching the girl's forehead as they passed by. She breathed in deep, taking in the scent of the misting ocean, its whitecaps in the distance driven only by the wind at sea. The cliff under her feet felt strong and supportive, and the wild, endlessly flowing sea reflected her heart in its darkened depths.

Her deep eyes flashed open, and her gloved hand went instinctively to the necklace around her neck. Curving her fingers around its cold, smooth surface, she breathed out a sigh of relief. She still had something of her mother's with her.

She gazed out again at the night-scape, the full moon pulling and pushing the water into an endless rhythm so like her own heartbeat. She glanced up at the moon's white, glowing surface and thought of Yue. Was she up there now, looking back down at her? Was she pleased, or was she disappointed?

Her heart felt heavy again, and she returned her eyes to the water below for comfort. How could the ocean move in such a beautiful and controlled way? Even though it grew wild in tempests, it still had a natural, controlled ferocity about it that wondered her. She wondered if she was like that, but she couldn't help but feel her heart grow bitter when she thought about how out-of-control she'd been many times before.

She took a deep breath, drawing in the wet scent of the ocean and feeling it hit the roof of her mouth pleasantly. Her heart, however, refused to heal on the spot. Her scar was far too deep for that to happen; it had opened up again and she had to work to stitch it back together again. She felt tears try to form in her eyes, and a lump settled hard in her throat, but she fought them all the way. She couldn't just randomly break down now. She'd come out here to remember the past, but she'd also come here to think, to try to get over the sadness settling into her heart with the same subtle darkness as the ashen snowflakes that had fallen that day so long ago...

She broke out into tears again, and she sat down on the ground, still holding her necklace for all she was worth, somehow hoping its solid reality would break through to her and miraculously heal her on the spot. Unfortunately, it didn't. She had to do this herself.

But not alone.

"Katara?"

Her head whipped up, face wet with tears in the moonlight, to see none other than Zuko. She instantly shrank, trying to hide her tears from him.

He knelt down next to her, orange eyes soft with concern. "Don't hide from me, Katara. What's wrong?"

She looked down at her hands, which she now realized were trembling.

"I'm sorry, Zuko," she replied with a quavering voice, "I just...really need to be alone right now."

Zuko didn't leave, and she looked up in surprise; he'd always respected her need for privacy at times just like she had for him.

Reading her eyes, he said quietly, "Katara, I'd leave if I thought that's what you needed, but I really don't think that's true."

She jerked her eyes up to his, hesitation and fear evident in her own. Finally, she let out a broken sigh and shifted to a more comfortable sitting position. She purposefully didn't make eye contact, but gazed out of the corner of her eye over the sea again.

"How did you find me?"

"You were gone for a long time, and Aang said you'd gone for a walk. Suki mentioned seeing you look a little more sad than usual, so I decided to track you and see if anything was wrong." His reply was direct but not unkind-his usual way of speaking.

She couldn't help but laugh, just a little, her tears starting to dry up on her face. Sniffing, she quickly revealed why she'd been out, looking at the sea and the moon. "I...was just thinking of my mother." She noticed Zuko flinch, just barely, but he kept his eyes trained on her. "It was her birthday today." Her voice broke, and she struggled briefly with herself before burying her head in her hands. "I miss her so much," the strangled addition broke out.

Zuko's eyes said more than his words could've, at that point in time. Quietly, he wrapped Katara in a hug, worried that she would reject it but relaxing when she leaned into him, crying on his shoulder. He knew there was an equal chance of her either accepting his help or shoving him away, knowing she needed to work it out on her own. Saying it out loud must have made it worse for her; she knew it had for him, when he'd first told the group about his own mother. Images flitted before his eyes of her face, but he closed his eyes and forced them out. Katara was the one who needed help right now, not him. He held her until her sobs began to subside.

"Katara? Katara," he said more firmly, gently grabbing her face and turning it towards him, waiting for her to raise her oceanous eyes to look in his. "Katara, your mother never really left you; she joined herself to you in the only way she could, to save your life. I know that she gave herself to save you, and I know she would've done it again in a heartbeat. She would've been proud of you. You are Katara, but you also embody who she was; I've heard Sokka talk about it. He insists that when he thinks of your mother, he thinks of you. I think she'd want you to be who you are, and that she'd be flattered about you being like her too. I think she wants you to live your life, even with the pain of losing her, because that's the life she bought for you."

He watched as her beautiful, sparkling eyes looked back at his, the sorrow still evident in them but hope laced in amongst the sparks. "You...you really think so?" she wondered brokenly.

He nodded, a slight smile on his face. "Yes."

She looked down and a thin smile broke through the fog. "Thank you...I just...it's so hard without her. It's like everyday I wake up and my heart hurts, because a big part of it is broken off..." she trailed off, looking back at him, realization suddenly flooding her eyes. "But you know that too, don't you?"

Sadly, Zuko nodded in response. She reached out and enveloped him in her own hug, and, pleasantly surprised, he drank in the smell of her sweet hair. They parted, and she looked him straight on. "Zuko, I'm so sorry," she started.

"It's okay."

"No, we both know it's not, Zuko. It'll never be okay."

"But we'll get through it anyway," he replied, his eyes warm.

She ducked her head only a moment before locking her eyes with his again. She smiled gently. "Alright," she said, "I'm willing to give it a shot if you are."

He smiled. "That's more like the Katara I know," he replied. "If I recall correctly, you're the one who froze me in a giant thing of ice. Several times."

She laughed then, a real, genuine laugh. "I remember! And you were furious too!"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh please," he said, "I could totally take you in a fight now."

"Oh yeah?" she challenged, all sad thoughts forgotten with her raised eyebrow, "Why don't you prove it?"

"You're on!"

The rest of Team Avatar found them half an hour later, in the thick of "battle".

They promptly watched Zuko get frozen...yet again.

Fine!

:) 3 :) A Katara/Zutara Fanfic :) 3 :)