Welcome, one and all! This is a one-shot based off the fight between Link and Ganon on the old Legend of Zelda, as you may have guessed from the summary.

Floating Skull: Such a pitiful game is too simple for Floating Skull!!

Ivan: I've played better, but it was all right.

Beast Boy: Does anybody know where Level 5 is?

Ghetto Felix: Ya shizzle the pizzle where the nizzle koshizzles!

B.B.: Thanks, Ghetto Felix!

Yeah, so anyway, I hope you all enjoy this.

Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!!

-

The eyeball with wings known as Patra flew to the left, and the mini-Patras rotating around it moved to account for it. Link moved in to stab the rotating circle, but its orbit changed and became erratic. Link paused and watched, looking for a pattern. "This would be so much easier if I could move in more than four directions!" he thought to himself. After a moment, he swooped in and dealt blow after blow the mini-Patras, dodging with ease. Within seconds, all that remained was the large central Patra. Defeating it didn't present the slightest challenge.

The door to the next chamber opened. According to Link's map, this was the only place he hadn't been to. Ganon and Zelda must be inside. Knowing the final battle was imminent, Link sat down to catch his breath. He had traveled long and hard to get here, searching Hyrule for the eight hidden Labyrinths, and fighting countless battles to claim the Triforce of Wisdom as his own. Would it be enough to counter Ganon and the Triforce of Power? Link would soon find out.

After several minutes, Link climbed to his feet. Gripping his Magical Sword in his left hand and a Magical Shield in his right, Link marched into the next chamber.

It was dark, darker than dark. Link knew his Red Candle wouldn't light this room, so instead, he lifted the Triforce of Wisdom above his head. A brilliant light blazed across the room, revealing the Link's horrifying opponent. Ganon towered over Link, his pig-like face etched with evil. His skin was light blue, but far from being relaxing, it shone with a sinister intent. Around his neck was a necklace adorned with a human skull, possibly his last victim's.

Ganon had shielded his face from the radiant Triforce, but he quickly assumed a battle position. Roaring, he threw an energy ball at Link. Link, knowing his shield would be worthless, ducked to the right and turned to charge at his nemesis. But to his horror, Ganon had vanished! Another energy ball slammed into Link from the side, then from his back. Link struggled to climb to his feet, but felt Ganon's large fist strike him back down. It was a game of cat and mouse, with Link being the latter.

"Show yourself, you coward!" roared Link. "Fight like a man!"

"And make the end of the game easy?" sneered the invisible Ganon. "Did you think you could just learn my movements like Gleeok or Manhandla?"

"No!" replied Link. "I thought you'd be weak like Aquamentus!"

"You'll pay for that!" exclaimed Ganon. Grabbing Link around the throat, he lifted Link into the air and hurled him at the wall.

Link fell to the floor with a thud! Knowing his hearts were low, he drank his Red Potion. In an instant, his health had filled itself. The potion, instead of depleting itself, turned blue.

"Drink all the potion you want," scoffed Ganon. "You're only delaying the inevitable."

"I'll beat you yet, Ganon!" shouted Link. Charging blindly forward, he felt nothing resist his motion, thus he halted before hitting the wall.

"Do you know why you can't beat me?" inquired Ganon. "Your programming is only in 8-Bits. Mine is so much more powerful. I boast a mighty 9-Bits! And someday, I will have acquired 16-bits!"

"No!" cried Link. "You're lying, there's no such thing as 16-Bits!"

"Ah, how naïve you are." Ganon chuckled heartily, his voice echoing again and again around his chamber. "But it's true. You will soon be obsolete!"

"This isn't possible," moaned Link to himself. "I'm out-programmed by something I can't even see." Link blinked in sudden realization. "That's it!" He stood tall and raised his voice. "You talk big, Ganon! But you fail to realize that while you're invisible, you're programming is irrelevant."

"What foolishness is this?" demanded the foul king.

"Simply this: while you are invisible, you have 0-Bits!" accused Link.

"WHAT!?" screamed Ganon. "No, it can't be!"

"But it is!" continued Link, impressed with his own brilliance. "I might die, but everyone will still talk about how well-rendered I am onscreen. As far as everyone else will know, you will exist in name only!"

Ganon growled, letting every sound drip with loathing. Then after a moment's pause, "Very well, if that's the way you want it! Witness the finest form you shall ever see!" Where there had been naught but air now showed the evil king in all his glory. "See how well-rendered my princely body is? It is the instrument of your destruction!"

"I don't think so!" cried Link, cocking a Silver Arrow onto his bow. "Personally, I think you barely have 7-Bits." Before Ganon could reply, he fired the deadly projectile directly at Ganon's heart.

"Oh shit," muttered Ganon right before the Silver Arrow pierced his black heart. His howl of pain filled the room. Before death claimed him, however, he had a message for Link. "You may have beaten me. But you are now cursed. Your wounds will not heal, and the undead shall walk the land, inspiring fear throughout the villages and…"

"You idiot!" shouted Link. "That's the premise for Castlevania II, and that's still in development!"

Ganon smirked. "So you're not as gullible as you look. But a curse you still shall have." With that last statement, Ganon's body quickly turned to ash. Lying atop his remains was the Triforce of Power. Link claimed it and entered the next room.

Inside was the fair Princess Zelda surrounded by flames. Her eyes filled with joy as she spotted her rescuer. Link swiped away the fire and approached the princess. Kneeling, he said, "I'm glad to see you unharmed, your majesty."

Zelda reached down and took his hand. She pulled him up so that they stood eye-to-eye. Smiling she said, "Thank you, Link. You are the hero of Hyrule! Another quest begins from here."

Link's eyes went wide, but before he could make any inquiries, everything went black. Several seconds passed, then the world reappeared. He was in the same spot he had started his previous journey. The first thing he noticed was that his tunic had returned to green, instead of the red it had been while he possessed the Red Ring. Scrambling, he soon discovered that his sword and equipment had vanished. All he had left was his small shield.

"DAMN YOU GANOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!" he roared into the sky. From someplace unknown, a sinister laugh filled the sky.

-

Well, there you have it.

Flt. Sk.: Floating Skull is disgusted; once again the puny mortal author has made a new low for himself.

Ivan: I don't see why Link was complaining. His story ends conclusively. My game was somewhat anti-climatic.

B.B.: Dude, it must totally suck to be a video game character.

Ght. Flx.: Fo'shizzle yo!

In any case, don't forget to review, so I know how you felt. And don't forget to check out my other story, The Legend of Zelda: Cameos of Time.

Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!!