Disclaimer: I don't own Community, yo.
These are 27 brief ficlets written for the Milady_Milord firing squad over on LJ. Each is a response to a prompt, and is between 300 and 1500 words.
Enjoy :)
Introduction to Etiquette
Rated G: Jeff finds himself satisfied just to make out with Annie on their first date (iknowitsbutters)
The meal had gone on longer than expected. Jeff usually rushed his way through dinner so he could get to the good part with the women he chose to date. This one was different, though; he wasn't rushing toward an end game, he was rushing toward... he wasn't quite sure. A future, maybe? It was all kind of new to him. Now, at 35 years old, he was finally experiencing what it felt like to actually want to spend time with a woman.
It didn't come as much of a surprise to him that Annie was the woman who brought out that side of him. She'd been impossibly patient with him as he worked his way through his various issues, and now he was ready to be patient with her. Annie wasn't the kind of girl you took home to sleep with on the first date. She was the kind of girl you put in the effort for, and proved yourself to.
And that's why when the night was over, Jeff brought her home. He walked her to the door of the apartment she shared with Troy and Abed, and stood outside holding her hands in his as she smiled up at him with more genuine happiness than he could remember ever seeing from her.
"This was fun," she said softly.
"Worth the wait?" he asked, a little bashful at having made her wait so long for him to finally work things out. She nodded slowly.
"Yea, I think so." His brow furrowed.
"Just think?" She shrugged.
"Well, you haven't kissed me yet. That might give it a little boost." Jeff's lips quirked into a lopsided grin.
"Isn't there some kind of rule about kissing on the first date?" he teased. He didn't give her time to respond, choosing to swoop down and capture her lips in a slow, soft, easy kiss. He could feel Annie smiling against his lips as she sunk into him, which sent a little jolt of excitement through his chest. This was what he'd been missing for four years. This was worth the wait.
Jeff easily wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against his body as he rested his back against the wall beside their door. Annie leaned into him as the two continued to move their lips together finding an easy pace. Annie's lips parted beneath his, and he dipped his tongue between them, meeting hers in her mouth. They explored one another casually, lazily, and Annie held onto the lapels of his jacket as she rested against his strong chest.
It was another few minutes before a loud knock came at the door beside them. Annie pulled away slowly, eyeing the door.
"I told them not to do that," she said, though her eyes held a hint of amusement.
"They just want to make sure you're not taking advantage of me," he teased.
"Don't you want me to take advantage of you?" she said with a conspiratorial grin.
"Oh, most definitely," he replied. He leaned down and pecked her lips lightly. "But not tonight." Her brow furrowed.
"Why not?"
"Because I want to do this right," Jeff said, punctuating the thought with another kiss. He pulled away and let out a long breath. "Which, unfortunately, means dropping you off to your two dad's now that the night is over." She narrowed her eyes.
"How long are you planning on keeping up this propriety kick?" she questioned.
"About fifteen more minutes... so you'd better get inside before I change my mind," he joked. Annie smiled lightly and leaned up to kiss him once again.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" she asked. Jeff nodded.
"Tomorrow's good." She began toying with his tie.
"And maybe we can end tomorrow night at your place?" Jeff groaned and put his hand on her back pushing her toward the door.
"You're killing me, woman. Go inside!" Annie just giggled and turned the knob, pushing the door open just a little. She turned back to him with a small smile.
"Thanks for dinner, Jeff," she said softly. He smiled and leaned in, placing a final kiss on her lips.
"Thanks for giving me another shot."
End
Advanced Dream Analysis
Rated NC17: Annie's smutty fantasies/dreams that include Troy, Jeff and Abed - um, in different dreams (busycybering)
Annie shivered as the drones circled around her, falling into a stiff, unnatural pace. Their cybernetic implants covered 90% of their bodies, making them more robot than human. They seemed to look right through her, apparently unable to tell that something about her was different.
"They can't see us," Abed assured her. She turned to her friend with wide eyes.
"How can you be so sure?" she asked.
"Because they haven't adapted to our cloaking technology yet. We have to do this quickly."
Annie wasn't sure what this was. Everything about the scene was so very surreal, and unreal, and hard for her to focus on. She chose instead to focus on Abed. Somehow, she knew that he knew this Borg cube inside and out—he would get them out alive.
Suddenly, the cube began to shake uncontrollably, sending Annie flying into Abed's arms. He caught her, but the force sent the two of them tumbling into an unoccupied regeneration chamber. Annie found herself pinned between Abed and the hard metallic wall. She looked up at him, expecting to find him watching her with his traditional impassive expression, but was surprised to find he looked different.
He wanted her. She knewhe wanted her.
And what was more, she wanted him too.
It all happened so fast. One moment the cube was shaking and jolting them from wall to wall, and the next, his hands and lips were on her, his erection pressed against her core, her legs around his slim waist as she held onto protruding metallic handles to keep herself up.
The ship jostled once more, and suddenly her surroundings had changed. She was no longer in a Borg Cube. Now she was up against a tree, and the erection hard against her centre was not that of Abed, but Troy.
She breathed in the fresh air for a moment, trying to blink herself into consciousness, only to fall further into the moment. Troy's lips attached to her own and she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, holding him to her. This was what she had wanted too much in high school—and it wasn't particularly surprising to Annie that this version of Troy was not the one she shared an apartment with. She could tell by the Letter jacket he still wore, and how his hands groped her ass in the way an awkward teenage boy would.
She looked down and realized that she was different too. She was heavier, and she could feel her head buzzing with drugs that she hadn't touched in nearly four years.
But at that moment, she didn't care. The moment was so heightened, so lucid that all she could do was feeland sink into the impossible scenario of being groped and dry-humped by her high school crush.
"Shit, Baby," Troy said against her neck. "Let me in that tight... wet..." Annie stopped listening. Troy and dirty talk confused the hell of her, so she chose just to feel. Feel his hands on her and his cock against her. Feel his fingers pushing aside her underwear and sinking into her hot, wet core. Feel his thumb searching unsuccessfully for her clit, landing somewhere on the outer lips of her vagina.
She didn't care. Troy could miss her centre entirely and she'd still be happy to sink into this moment.
Then, finally, miraculously, a thumb connected with her clit, causing her to cry out. Her eyes flew open, and she realized the reason for the sudden coordination. She wasn't with Troy anymore—she was with Jeff, up against the door of his bedroom.
"Fuck, Annie, you're so wet," Jeff mumbled against her skin. Annie shuddered at the rasp in his voice, wanting, needingto go faster.
"Please, Jeff," she moaned, grinding against his hand. Jeff pulled his face from her neck and affixed her with a small smirk, all the while plunging his long, dexterous fingers into her wetness.
"Please what?" She moaned again.
"Please fuck me, Jeff. Please." Annie hardly knew what was happening as she was ripped from the door and deposited on the bed. She watched as Jeff tore his shirt over his head and pushed his pants to the floor, before closing the distance and in a swift pull, removed her skirt and underwear, leaving her in just a tank top and cardigan on his bed.
He wasted no time fulfilling her request. Annie cried out as he entered her quickly, setting up a brisk pace inside of her.
Annie cried out and grasped his shoulders as her ankles crossed behind his back, giving him as much room to manoeuvre within her as she possibly could.
It was a quick burn after the build-up. She knew she couldn't hold off for long, and she also knew Jeff was as close as he could possibly be without losing his mind.
Annie began to groan louder and more freque...
I'VE GOT A POCKET, GOT A POCKET FULL OF SUNSHINE
I'VE GOT A LOVE AND I KNOW THAT IT'S ALL MINE
OH, OOH WHOA OH!
Annie awoke with a start and looked around with confusion. She wasn't in Jeff's bed, or in the woods, or on a Borg Cube. She was in her own bedroom, with the digital clock beside her bed blaring Pocket Full of Sunshineas loud as it possibly could, signalling that it was time to get up.
Annie groaned and crossed her legs, moving her hips, seeking the release Natasha Bedingfield had so cruelly deprived her of.
Fuck Natasha Bedingfield.
End
Let's Go to Canada
Rated G:Jeff and Annie and Canada (oneofthemuses)
"Just spin around, and with your eyes closed, point to some place on the map and that's where we'll go," Jeff instructed. He and Annie were planning their first ever vacation as a couple, and had quickly realized that choosing a location for such an important trip was nearly impossible. Eventually, they just decided to leave it up to fate.
Jeff assisted Annie as she spun around three times, one hand over her eyes, the other outstretched with her pointer-finger ready. Finally, Jeff pointed her in the direction of the map, and her finger landed on a spot.
"We're going to..." Annie pulled her hand from her eyes and frowned. "The middle of the Indian Ocean."
"Okay, go again!" Jeff said, spinning her again.
"Jeff, I'm getting dizzy," she complained.
"Then don't land in the middle of an ocean this time!"
"But I can't see!"
"Use the force, Luke," Jeff teased. Once again, he pointed her in the direction of the map and watched her finger make looping shapes around the world before finally landing on an actual landmass. Annie unveiled her eyes again and squinted at the shape beneath her finger. "Umm... what is that?" Jeff asked. "Is that part of Maine?"
Annie rolled her eyes, "No, it's part of Canada," she said. She squinted a little closer to read the tiny text. "Nova Scotia."
"Eww," Jeff said quickly. Annie rolled her eyes.
"Guess we're going to Halifax," she said, chipper.
"You could always try it again," he suggested. Annie turned to him, crossing her arms over her chest.
"This was your idea, Jeff. That's what fate chose, so that's where we're going." Jeff sighed.
"Alright, fine... how about this. We got to... Halifax... for one day, and then take a flight from there to Paris for a week!" Annie contemplated this a moment before a wide smile came across her features.
"We could go to the Louvre!"
Jeff and Annie arrived in Halifax, Nova Scotia on a warm Friday night in July, and headed straight for the hotel. They decided that since they only had one day in the small Canadian city that they would talk to the hotel concierge in the morning and get her to give them a game plan.
When they woke up the next morning, that's exactly what they did.
"Only one day?" asked Jane, the concierge.
"Yep," Jeff confirmed. "We're heading out tomorrow morning, so we really want to make the most of our time here." The woman smiled.
"Well, you won't get to see it all, but let's see what we can come up with." She pulled a small Halifax! pamphlet and began looking through it.
"Okay, here's what I suggest: the tall ship Silva sails at 11 a.m.—you can buy tickets for that on the boardwalk. It's only 9 a.m. now, so you'll have about an hour and a half to kill before you need to be there. If you walk all the way to the end of the boardwalk, you'll reach the Farmer's Market, which is a place where local artisans sell their goods. If you're looking to pick up any trinkets or gifts, that's a great place to do it. After the Silva, you can have lunch on the balcony of Murphy's Cable Wharf, overlooking Halifax harbour.
After lunch, since you rented a car, I suggest you travel about half an hour outside of the city and spend the afternoon at Peggy's Cove—it's one of Nova Scotia's most popular destinations, and it's absolutely beautiful. You can have a great lobster dinner out there too, from a locally owned restaurant—guaranteed to be the best lobster you will ever have in your life, no exaggeration.
Later tonight, you should check out one of our local pubs. Halifax has more bars per capita than any other place in North America, so you have no shortage of options. I would suggest going to Pogue Fado, the Irish Public House. At 9 there's going to be a great local band playing, and you'll be able to really experience Halifax culture at its finest.
After that, the night is yours. You can go bar hopping, come back here and spend some time in the casino, or just wander around the city. It's beautiful and perfectly safe at night." Jane finished with a nod and smile, while Annie wrote furiously in her notepad to get all of that information. With a thank you, Annie and Jeff headed out to start their day in Halifax.
The Halifax boardwalk was just a few minutes from the door of their hotel, and although it was still early in the morning, the heat was already starting to rise. Jeff was quickly questioning his decision to pack only long-sleeved shirts for his trip to Canada. After buying tickets for the Silva, they heeded Jane's advice and wandered further down the boardwalk in search of the Farmer's Market.
"This is really beautiful," Annie said wistfully, her fingers tangled with Jeff's as they walked hand-in-hand. Jeff huffed.
"It's a boardwalk and a smelly harbour—don't get too excited." She rolled her eyes.
"Are you at least going to try to have fun?" Jeff let out a breath.
"I'll try," he said, though his voice held a bit of scepticism.
True to Jane's directions, they found the market without a hitch. Even at 9:15, it was already abuzz with hundreds of people surrounding dozens of artisans' booths. Annie excitedly wandered around, every-so-often picking up a hand-crafted piece of jewelry and admiring it. Jeff tried to stay cynical, but even he had to admit that some of the pieces were pretty impressive. Not that he was particularly impressed by the folksy nature of the whole scene, but Annie's excitement was infectious.
As Annie wandered ahead, Jeff stopped by one booth and picked up a small, hand-carved trinket of a humpback whale. He slipped the artisan $20 and pocketed it for later.
After about an hour at the market, Annie and Jeff headed for their trip on the Silva. Even Jeff had to admit that it was kind of awesome being on an actual tall ship. As they cut through the waves, he felt free in a way he rarely did while caught in congested traffic back home. This was a completely new experience for him.
"Okay, this is pretty cool," Jeff admitted after a while. Annie smiled up at him widely and pulled him to the bow where the two looked over the water, glistening brightly in the midday sun. To their right was the cityscape of Halifax, which was more beautiful than Jeff cared to admit.
Despite himself, he felt much of his cynicism about Nova Scotia fade away; especially when he spotted a small family of porpoises skimming through the water around the boat.
After the Silva, Jeff and Annie had a seafood-packed lunch at Murphy's, and it was easily the best fish and chips Jeff had ever tasted. The server informed them that the haddock had been fresh off the boat that morning.
Following lunch, they returned to the hotel, got in their rental car, and raced out to Peggy's Cove.
"So what exactly is this place supposed to be?" Jeff asked as he drove. Annie looked over the brochure she'd snagged from the hotel's front desk.
"The unique landscape of Peggy's Cove was carved by the migration of glaciers and the ocean tides. About 20,000 years ago, an ice ridge moved south..."
"Ugh, stop talking. I feel like I'm in an actual school that's not Greendale," Jeff complained. Annie just giggled and peered out the window as the clear, blue ocean sped by on her right. Soon, the terrain turned more rocky, until finally they were parked at Peggy's Cove.
"Okay, now this is beautiful," Annie said excitedly, heading out toward the rocks. Jeff couldn't suppress a small smile as he followed along. Once the two reached some higher rocks, they were able to see out to sea for miles, a view they had never experienced, being from Colorado. "Isn't this beautiful, Jeff?" Annie prodded with a small smile. Jeff just smiled and put his arm around her, taking in the scenery.
"Okay, so I might have been a little hard on this place," Jeff admitted later on, after enjoying his first taste of Atlantic lobster. Annie smiled in contentment, and then headed back into the city with Jeff.
They closed out the evening, as suggested, at Pogue Fado, the Irish Public House. The band turned out to be a local folk group that reminded them both very much of Great Big Sea. Groups of people were dancing and carrying on with the music, and even Jeff couldn't help but get swept up into the fun. At some point during the evening, he realized he was having a genuine Nova Scotian experience, and he couldn't hide that fact that it kind of rocked.
When they left the next morning, they both knew this would not be their last trip to Halifax.
End
Introduction to Fanatics
Rated PG-13: Jeff and Annie discover Jeff/Annie shipping sites online after Abed's newest documentary becomes a cult sensation (eleventhimpala)
It wasn't rare for Jeff to Google himself. He justified it as a means of ensuring his online presence was positive, and would not be detrimental to his career. In truth, he was always just a little bit afraid of what the women he dated might have to say about him.
On this particular day, Jeff was scrolling through his Google results at the study room table, while Annie diligently looked over her notes on her computer.
"Ho. Ly. Crap," Jeff said after clicking on one particular link. Annie looked up from her computer.
"What?" Jeff blinked and looked at his phone again, before jumping up from his seat and swiftly taking Shirley's, grabbing hold of Annie's computer. "What's going on?" she asked.
"You need to see this," Jeff said, rapidly typing "Jeff Winger" into the search bar. Annie rolled her eyes.
"I needto see your Google search results?"
"Yes!" Jeff insisted. He clicked on the third link down. Annie watched as a page popped up with an awkwardly photoshopped picture of her and Jeff's faces on the bodies of a... very intimate couple.
"Gah!" Annie cried out, taking in the full view of the sight. "Jeff and Annie, Star-Crossed Lovers. What the Hell is this?" Jeff scrolled down to the explanation.
"A fan-site for Jeff and Annie, characters in Abed Nadir's latest cult hit, The Study Room Diaries," he read aloud.
"Oh God," Annie cried out. Jeff scrolled down further.
"That's what she said," he joked. Annie elbowed him. "Ow, no, seriously—that's what she, Annie, said, according to this... Jeff and Annie fanfic." Annie leaned in to read the full line.
"Oh god, Annie moaned as Jeff's stuck his giant, throbbing co... Oh my God! Jeff! People are writing porn about us!" she exclaimed. Jeff chuckled at her discomfort, despite his own. Torturing Annie made all of this weirdness worth it.
"So, uhh, have you actually seenAbed's new documentary?" he asked. Annie shook her head, still gaping at the page before her.
"He wouldn't let me watch it," she said. She read down the line a little further. "Jeff and Annie had been fighting their feelings for too long. It was only a matter of time before the dam broke..." she scoffed. "The dam broke? Ugh. Don't we have any fans who aren't addicted to clichés?" Jeff laughed out loud.
"Seriously? That's your takeaway from all of this?" he asked. Annie rolled her eyes.
"Come on, Jeff. If they're going to write fanfiction about us, the least they could do is make it interesting."
"Why?" he asked. "So you can read it in bed later?" He laughed at Annie's horror at the suggestion.
"Jeff!"
"What? I know that's what I'll be doing tonight." She rolled her eyes.
"We need to talk to Abed."
"And say what? Take down your film, people like us too much?"
"Or something to that effect, yes," Annie said indignantly. Jeff closed the computer.
"Annie, chill out. Who cares if we have a few... fans?"
"Well, obviously you do or else you wouldn't have shown me the site," Annie rationalized. Jeff offered a one-shouldered shrug.
"I was just caught off-guard. It doesn't actually bother me. Does it bother you?" Annie bit her lip, looking down at her now closed laptop.
"I don't know... I guess not. If it doesn't bother you." Jeff offered a small smile.
"Good. Let's just let it blow over. The Jeff/Annie craze can't last that long, can it?" She looked up at him.
"I guess not." Jeff smirked.
"And hey, if occasionally you want me to stick my giant, throbbing co..."
"OKAY!" Annie exclaimed, grabbing her laptop and jumping out of her seat. "We need to have a chat with Abed."
End
Maybe
Rated PG: Abed and/or Troy locks Jeff into Annie's room using the lock installed in Origins of Vampire Mythology (allvowels)
"Either bone or shut up!" Troy yelled from the living room. Annie stared at the door, wide eyed.
Just moments earlier, she and Jeff had been playfully/flirtingly arguing in the living room when Troy and Abed had lured them into Annie's bedroom under the guise of having to show them something 'really weird.' As soon as they were fully inside, the door was slammed shut, and Annie heard the outside lock slide into place.
"Who the hell has a lock on the outside of their bedroom?" Jeff exclaimed, furiously ramming into the door. Annie sighed deeply and flopped back onto the bed.
"It was an extreme circumstance," she offered, vaguely. Jeff ripped his hand from the doorknob and turned to lean back against it.
"You need new roommates," Jeff said, still irritated, but coming down from the level of rage he'd previously occupied.
"I don't get it," Annie said quietly. Then she raised her voice so the guys outside could hear her. "WE WEREN'T EVEN DOING ANYTHING!"
"YOU'RE THE NEW BRITTA AND JEFF!" came Troy's response, which apparently was supposed to mean something.
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?" Annie cried. Jeff rolled his eyes and came to sit next to her.
"It means we're annoying the hell out of them and we either need to... well... bone or shut up." Annie pushed herself up so she was in a seated position.
"Well, that's not gonna happen," she said indignantly. Jeff raised an eyebrow.
"It's not?"
"No!" Annie cried. "Or at least not like this. I don't want this to happen because of Troy and Abed."
"But you do want it to happen," Jeff clarified. Annie let out a long breath and flopped back onto her back.
"I don't know," she said. She chanced a glance at Jeff. "Do you?" He offered a one-shouldered shrug.
"I don't know. Maybe." Annie waited for him to clarify. When he didn't, she jumped in.
"Maybe... what? Maybe you want to sleep with me?" Jeff laughed lightly, and grabbed Annie's hand.
"Oh, I definitely want to sleep with you." Annie's eyes widened at the admission, but he continued. "And maybe I want more than that, too. Maybe." Annie let out a long, shuddered breath. He was being honest. Maybe she owed Troy and Abed for this little ruse.
"Well, like I said," she said slowly. "It's not gonna happen like this." Jeff nodded understandingly.
"I know. I don't want it to happen this way either," he said quietly. Annie bit her bottom lip and caught his eye.
"How do you want it to happen?" His lips turned slightly upward.
"Well, for starters, it won't be in a bed with floral printed sheets, with dozens of stuffed animals watching us." Annie giggled.
"Fair enough. What else?" Jeff laid back next to her, still holding her hand in his.
"I don't know. I could cook you dinner, I guess."
"You cook?" she asked, genuinely surprised. Jeff chuckled.
"I'm a man of many talents," he explained. Annie smiled.
"Okay, what else?"
"You want more?" he mocked exasperation, which made Annie laugh.
"No, you can surprise me with the rest," she amended. Jeff grinned.
"Good, 'cause I wasn't gonna tell you anything else anyways."
"Of course not," she allowed.
"Of course, all of this is hypothetical," Jeff teased. "There's still one little hitch." Annie's brow furrowed.
"What's that?"
"Well," Jeff said slowly. "You haven't agreed to go on a date with me yet."
"You haven't asked," she shot back.
"Fair enough," Jeff said quietly. Annie watched him a moment, waiting.
"Well?" she asked after a moment of silence.
"Well what?" She rolled her eyes.
"Are you gonna ask?" He shrugged and pushed himself up, disengaging their hands and heading back to the door.
"Maybe."
End