How Chief Sly Fox became President of the United States
by Nikki Little
Once upon a time a brilliant U.S. economist came to the conclusion that the U.S. could become the richest nation on earth by outsourcing all the work to nations with very-low-cost labor. He was looking at the potential effect on corporate profits and the valuation of stocks. Everything worked out, and so it was done. All the high-tech knowledge work was outsourced to India and all the manufacturing work was outsourced to China. The stock market soared. No one noticed that Americans were reduced to flipping burgers and working in non-union warehouses to support their families. There were still enough affluent Americans to keep the malls packed for at least the next twenty years. Since the stock market was soaring, everybody was happy. Except the burger flippers and warehouse flunkies, of course.
Then something unexpected happened. China and India got into a nuclear war and turned each other into a giant sheet of glass. The U.S. stock market crashed and the almighty dollar became worth so little that people wiped their tushes with $100 bills since it was cheaper than buying toilet paper from the hoarders. Since the U.S., and every other developed nation, no longer had any manufacturing capacity or knowledge of how to make anything in low-tech workshops, it became necessary to purchase the most basic of survival goods from the most traditional of Indian tribes. The only thing the U.S. still had of value was land. So the government began selling off the U.S. to the Hopi Indians in return for moccasins and traditional Indian clothes. In fact, the U.S. government eventually sold the entire country to the Hopi Indian tribe in return for moccasins, clothes, and those grinding stones that the Hopis use to make flour for flatbread.
The Hopis ended up owning the entire country. And that is how Chief Sly Fox became President of the United States.
A fable in the style of Aesop.