Backround- First of all this is written as a fanficiton for the Anti-Hinata fanclub of the NarutoFan forums. This is meant to be taken as a joke so if you're a Hinata fan without a sense of humor don't read, any flames will be ignored. This will be about 4 chapters long, but a prequel is in the works, and even hinted at in here.

Hinata was nervous, and when Hinata was nervous she ate. Laid out before the defective Hyuuga heir was enough food to fill even the biggest of the Akimichi's. Everything from chocolate to sushi, on a table stretching farther then you could see. There were some advantages to living in a rich family, with their own personal chefs, and she took advantage of them on a regular basis.

Now as to why Hinata was so nervous on this particular day, is indeed a good question. It had started out like any other day, until about 7 pm or what Hinata had come to refer as "Naruto hour". Now one may wonder what "Naruto hour" consisted of. You would probably guess that it involved Hinata hanging out with Naruto, but you see Hinata is much to stupid and shy to actually do something as simple as talk to the blond boy of her affections. Instead she reverts to a much more drastic measures to spend time with her "one true love". You see Hinata is a stalker, and one of the very best to. Now I know the idea of a female stalker might seem odd to you, but for Hinata it was the most natural thing ever. Hinata had long ago given up any hopes of using her Byakugan for fighting purposes, after a crushing defeat from her younger sister in front of the entire town. (A story for another time perhaps) Instead she had reverted to using her clan's most prized weapon only as a tool to becomes the world's most effective stalker.

Now this particular day's stalking had gone smoothly at first. Naruto had been eating at the ramen stand like always, and like always Hinata sat in the bushes across from the stand. There she would stare at the boy for hours fantasizing, a life where she wasn't such a complete loser, and actually was eating there with the boy. Unfortunately for our little failure, today Naruto was not eating alone like usual. Instead sitting in the seat where Hinata so often placed herself was a certain pink haired shinobi by the name of Sakura. Now as you can imagine Hinata did not like this one bit, that was her seat dammit, and she wasn't going to let some pink haired bitch take it from her…..well she wouldn't at least if she wasn't such a spineless freak. Instead with a few quick hand seals, and the words "stalk no jutsu", she disappeared in a puff of smoke, and reappeared moments later in the center of the Hyuuga complex.

Now Hinata was dumb, but not quite dumb enough to not know that Naruto had a very big crush on Sakura. Her small brain slowly managed to come to the conclusion that they were on a date, and almost as soon as she realized it, the tears began to form.As the tears began to swell in the defective heir's huge alien like, pupil less eyes, the sight of her could only be described as a science experiment gone wrong. She quickly ran into the kitchen to find some relieve in the form of food. Food being the only thing that didn't make her feel inferior. This is where she currently found herself, gorging on as much as she could fit into her mouth but little did she notice the fat rolls forming all around her as she continues to eat and eat and eat…..

Next time on- The Fat Roll's that almost consumed Konoha or the Hinata Hyuuga story-

Hinata has gotten huge, but after she finds out Naruto is now dating Sakura she only eats more. With her fat threatening to consume all, can the Akimichi clan help save her and all of Konoha?