Hello! Here is the first chapter! Jacob does indeed have reasoning behind leaving her, even though in the books it would appear that he would never leave her. Please give this a chance and R&R because I really want to know what you think! Your reviews motivate me! :)

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns Twilight, not me :(

Chapter 1: Talking to Carlisle

Renesmee POV

When one says they are in love with another they long to be with that person, to have that person be a part of their lives; but when one knows without words that they love someone, then they also know no way to live without them. I knew know way to live without my Jacob, I never thought I would have to learn how. Some would describe the feeling of such deep loss as an unbearable sorrow that seemed to fill your entire being, yet I felt the exact opposite. Without Jacob I felt emptiness beyond the point I ever thought possible before. It was as if he had taken a part of me with him when he left. I was starting to believe he truly had. In truth however most could never tell you how it feels, because few have ever loved someone as deeply as I loved Jacob.

My mother tells me it will get better with time, but I find this impossible to believe. Everywhere I look something is there to remind me of him. Over the years the wolves and my family had come to a truce, and some became friends. Every time I saw a wolf I reached a state to far away to even cry. I was done with crying, it wasn't helping and it wouldn't bring Jacob back.

It was still hard for me to grasp the concept that he was really gone. It had been months since he had left, but I could still feel his soft lips against my forehead as he murmured goodbye. He gave no explanation as to why he was leaving, one day he just left. I had chased after him, naturally, but when I caught up he looked pained and I was more confused than ever as to why he would leave. The part that confused me most was that as he walked away from me into the seemingly endless forest he told me he would always love me and that he wished he wasn't leaving. I wanted to ask why he had to leave if he didn't want to, but he was gone before I got the chance.

My family tried to get me to talk, but I rarely did anymore. As I walked into the kitchen that morning Esme asked me if I was hungry for breakfast. For no apparent reason I decided not to answer her and just walked straight to my Dad's old bedroom, which had quickly became my own when I stayed at the main house.

"I'll take that as a no" I heard Esme say softly while sighing. I sat down on my bed and listened to the conversation below. The only ones who were home were Carlisle, Esme, and Emmett; the rest had either gone hunting or shopping.

"I know she is having a rough time with Jacob leaving, but she shouldn't treat you like that Esme." I heard Carlisle say. I did feel guilty about how I had treated other people lately and I wished I could find another way to deal with my problems besides taking it out on the people around me, but I couldn't.

"I know but I feel bad for her, this is a really hard time for her and I don't want to make it worse."

"Maybe her not talking isn't such a bad thing, don't you remember how she would go on about all the boring books she had read and almost never shut up?" I didn't have to be there to know both Esme and Carlisle were shooting glares at Emmett.

"I think the only thing making it worse is that we've let it go on for so long. We don't need another incident like the last one with Bella. I'm going to go have a talk with her." Great, Carlisle was going to come talk to me. What did he mean "another incident"? All I knew was Carlisle would only say he was going to have a talk with one of us when he thought it had gone way too far and he needed to intervene. A few seconds later I heard a knock on the door.

"Renesmee, may I come in?" I didn't want to say yes but I knew saying no wasn't going to stop him from coming in anyway.

"Yeah, it's open." I mumbled quietly. I knew Carlisle could easily understand me regardless so I didn't bother to speak up. He closed the door behind him and sat down next to me, his expression serious, yet a small smile was notable in attempts to lighten the mood slightly.

"Renesmee," he began as he pulled me into a loose hug at his side, "I know this has been really hard on you, but it's no excuse to be disrespectful."

"I know but-"

"Let me finish, you can talk in a moment." He waited to see if I planned on saying something regardless and continued when I didn't. "As I was saying, because you are upset does not give you the right to be disrespectful. I'm not asking for you to engage yourself in any long conversations, but when someone asks you something you need to at least find the decency to respond politely." Having witnessed first-hand how incredibly rude I could be when I wasn't in a good mood he over-emphasized the word politely. "I haven't said much to you, considering the circumstances, but this has gone too far. It has been months since he left and you need to start at least trying to feel better. In all honesty Renesmee, I don't think you want to feel better." I opened my mouth to object but Carlisle silenced me before I had spoken. "The pain is how you remember him. I let it go the first couple of months thinking you would gradually bounce back over time, but it was four months ago that he left, and your depression hasn't shown any signs of improvement since the first week. I understand how important Jacob was to you, and a part of you will always seem broken because of it, but you can still beat it. You need to start doing something besides moping in your room all day." He had stopped talking so I took that as a signal to talk.

"But you don't understand how important he was to me, nobody does!" I almost screamed. I realized after I had said it that I sounded exactly like the teenage girls on TV, but I honestly felt like no one understood me.

"Renesmee, I know what it is like to care about someone very deeply and to feel as if you couldn't live without them."

"Yes, but you've never had to learn how!" I knew that everyone in my family was madly in love or something, but they couldn't possibly understand how it felt to lose that person.

"Your right Renesmee, I don't. There is however someone a lot closer to you than you may think that knows exactly how you feel right now

"Who are you talking about?" I asked him confused. I couldn't possibly imagine who he was talking about. I wasn't really close to anyone outside of my family.

"Your mother." He answered simply.

"Mom? I thought she meet Dad and they lived happily ever after or whatever after they got rid of all the vampires that wanted her destroyed. What are you talking about?"

"There is a lot you don't about your parent's story. Probably because your mother doesn't particularly enjoy talking about it. I'm sure however she would tell you if you asked her. You see, there was a time where your father left your mother even though he was still deeply in love with her. He believed she would be better off if he left, but she didn't know that was the reasoning behind it. He had simply told her that he didn't want her anymore." Did that have something to do with the incident he had mentioned downstairs, I wondered.

"Well how did they end up back together?" I asked him, suddenly eager to know more.

"That is not my story to tell, it is your parents. I would suggest that you ask them." With that he kissed me on the forehead and left.

Ok, so what did you think? Was it good? great? bad? horrible? I really do care what you think so if you have a second please leave a review :) I will try to have the next chapter up soon. :)