A/N: So this is my first fanfiction. Rated T for slight swearing and themes.
Italic= Jade's thoughts, Flashbacks, and Songs. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious or any of these songs used
Reason to Stay
Chapter 1: The Aftershock
Jade's POV
"Well it's official."
I stared down in the dark at my pearphone screen, lit up with my profile on The Slap.
Jade West is single.
I could feel a single tear roll down my cheek. It was rare for someone to see me cry. I only trusted a handful of people to see past my wall.
No, that's a lie. I only let 2 people through. Cat has been my best friend since kindergarten despite our polar opposite personalities. She can be very out of it, but she always knows how to comfort me. As for the other person, it was a mistake to trust him. I let my wall down and showed him my true self, leaving myself vulnerable. I was finally starting to trust other people a little bit, but all of that fell apart when I heard his true feelings.
"I'm not happy with our relationship!
I began to sob at the memory. He knew what I was going through, how my family fell apart, how my father verbally abused me every day. He knew about my insecurities especially after Miss Tori Perfect Vega came to Hollywood Arts. I fell back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. Almost everything in my room reminded me of Beck. Letting my tears fall freely down my face, I slowly drifted off to sleep.
****************
I grabbed my notebook from my locker when I heard giggling. It was that kind of sickening giggle that new lovely dovey couples make. I closed my locker, turned towards the source and saw Beck and Tori holding hands giving Eskimo kisses.
WHAT?!
Beck then pulled away and started to speak,
"Excuse me, everyone, I would like your attention. You all know Tori Vega, the most beautiful and most talented girl here at Hollywood Arts. I would like to ask her a question."
No… not even 12 hours after our breakup and he's going to ask Vega out?
"Tori, I have felt something for you ever since I saw you. I wanted to be with you, but I couldn't cut my ties with that bitch."
WHAT?!
"Now that I'm free…" Beck reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box as he got down on one knee.
No No No No No. This isn't happening.
"Victoria Vega, will you marry me?" He opened the box to reveal the most beautiful diamond engagement ring I have ever seen.
"YES!" Tori jumped into his arms as he pulled her into a kiss.
When they broke apart, he slipped the ring onto her finger and looked into her eyes, "I love you Tori." He leaned back in for another kiss…
************************
"NOOOOO!" I shot up, panting. I was still in my room, it was only a nightmare. But it was so clear and real. I glanced at my clock 2:11 AM. I reached for my phone to clear my head.
10 Missed Calls
3 Voicemails
15 Text Messages
The texts were mostly from the gang asking how I was (Oh I'm just dandy). The calls were mostly from Cat, but a few from the others. I might as well listen to these stupid voicemails.
The first was from Cat:
"Jadey, I know you're there please answer. I'm really worried about you, please just talk to me!"
Oh Cat. Short, sweet and to the point.
The next was from… Vega?:
"Jade, I know we don't talk much, but I'm worried, we all are. You have to talk to someone."
Yea like I want to talk to you.
The last was from Beck. I sighed and listened:
"Jade, um. Listen I want to start off with I'm sorry. I shouldn't have made those feelings public. I really do love you Jade, but I wasn't kidding when I said I'm tired of fighting. I think it would be best if we broke up for a while to give us some space from each other. I wish you the best of luck. You really are one of a kind, Jade. I'll see you tomorrow."
The tears resurfaced as I turned off my phone. After 3 years, he breaks up with me using a door and a phone. If he was tired of fighting then why did he argue back? He had always been so calm, he never lashed out. It's not fault I'm PMSing! Still I always gave him the chance to end things.
"So you want to break up with me?"
I gave him the option to leave, to say that he didn't love me, to be without me. Had he wanted to break up, I would have walked away. I may not show it often, but I actually respect other's opinions, especially Beck's. But whenever I asked, he would say no and stay to fight with me and then publicly ripping my heart out.
He said he loved me; he said he would never leave. But he's a guy so of course it was all a lie.
I can't believe I actually trusted him!
I must have been thinking for a while because my alarm went off:
"He said I want you forever, forever and always
Through the good and the bad and the ugly
We'll grow old together. Forever and always"
CRASH!
I threw my scissors through my alarm. I had forgotten Beck changed my alarm to the song he would always sing to me. I used to love that song; it always made me smile. Mostly because it's so cheesy and sappy, but also because it showed he loved me.
Stop it! He doesn't love you! He made that clear last night.
I reluctantly got ready for school grabbing my black jeans and long sleeved purple shirt. After I applied my makeup and fixed my hair, I started to head out to my car only to be blocked by my stepmom.
"And where are you going?" My stepmom stood in front of me in her business dress, her blonde hair in a messy bun, tapping her black stilettos at me. She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at me; a glare that would make mine looks like that of a helpless puppy. However I've seen it so many times it doesn't frighten me anymore.
"You know, I'm driving across the country to New York so I can join a gang. Where do you think I'm going?" I sneered.
"Fix that attitude. It's a wonder how that boy can put up with you."
I swallowed hard, "Yea well, he couldn't. We broke up."
"It's about time!" she scoffed, "he deserves someone who will actually love him. Not use him as a sex toy or punching bag."
"Excuse me? We never had sex and I've never hit him!" (Well, at least not abuse I should say.)
She grinned. "Oh honey, if you're going to give him hell, at least put out."
"THAT'S IT!"
I lunged forward, grabbed her hair with my left hand, and pulled my scissors from my boot with my right. I was ready to give HER hell when I heard my father.
"JADELYN AUGUST WEST! Let Kayla go! She has done nothing to deserve your incessant rudeness and violence!"
Kayla smirked as my father pried me off of my beloved and innocent stepmother. He glared at me with his ice cold eyes, "What were you thinking? You could have killed her!"
I rolled my eyes. "No duh. Tell her to stay out of my life and I'll leave her life alone."
Kayla spoke up, "Darling it's ok, she's just moody because that Oliver boy dumped her."
"Well it's about time; he deserves better."
I've had enough; I couldn't take it anymore. I shoved them aside to my car and drove off. I turned on the radio to clear my head.
"And he said I…" No
"Hey I just met you…" God no
"And I was like baby…" NOO!
"Every rose has its thorn" I turned up the volume.
As I pulled up to a stop sign, I realized my vision was blurry. I quickly wiped away the tears. I'll fix my makeup when I get to school. I pulled up to Hollywood Arts into my parking spot. I decided to stay in the car for a bit with the radio on. I looked up and saw Beck. He was wearing his typical gray plaid shirt, jeans and combat boots. The sun reflected across his gelled hair making him look like the first time I met him. He was surrounded by cheerleaders, shamelessly flirting. Though he smiled, it seemed off. His eyes weren't smiling at all, it fact they were red. His smile seemed forced and it seemed he didn't sleep one bit.
"I knew I could have saved a love that night if I'd known what to say
Instead of making love, we both made our separate ways.
But now he found somebody new and that I never meant that much to you
To hear that tears me up inside and to see you cuts me like a knife."
I quickly turned off my car. Why was my heart racing? I only felt this once before.
"What do you care? I'm not your girlfriend anymore!"
"I want Beck back!"
It's undeniable.
I'm still in love with Beck Oliver
A/N: I know the beginning is boring. The songs used were: "Forever and Always" by Parachute, "Call Me Maybe" by Carly Rae Jepson, "Baby" by Justin Beiber, and "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" cover by Miley Cyrus. Again I do not own any of those songs or artists. I got the inspiration from BrokenHurtInside's Bade video using "Forever and Always" watch?v=zFn0O0V-SWU Check it out. Any reviews would be much appreciated!