Chapter 1: Over Dramatic and Killing Bitches

Shane's POV:

"Please, John, don't go."

"I'm sorry, Donna, but I have to. You know that."

With blurry eyes, I reached over and grabbed another tissue.

"Why can't they just be together?" I sobbed pathetically.

These damn dramas always make me cry. I know I should stop watching them, but I love them too much to stop.

I continued watching the movie. John turned around to look at Donna once more.

Donna smiles sadly at him. "Goodbye love. I'll never forget you"

Whenever I watch a drama about a man leaving his girlfriend, I kind of... overreact a little.

"NO! JOHN! DON'T LEAVE HER! YOU BASTARD!" I yelled at the television actor. "SHE LOVES YOU AND YOU LOVE HER SO BE TOGETHER!"

Okay, okay. I overreact a lot, I admit. And I didn't just throw my potato chip bag at the TV.

Just as I turned off the movie, there was a knock at my door, startling me. "God damn it Joey! Fucking early..."

I jumped up and quickly tossed the movie somewhere on the shelf, throwing away the used tissues and potato chip bag before going to the entrance.

I smoothed the front of my shirt down and opened the door. "Hey." I said, smiling at my best friend.

"Hey." Joey smiled back, showing his perfectly white teeth. Damn, why are his teeth so fucking beautiful?

"Come in! Come in!" I said, practically pulling him inside before shutting the door tightly. "Okay! Shoot girl, don't rush me." Joey said in a chick-like voice.

"Sorry gurl, but my titties be goin crazy when yo're here." I joked back in my Shanaynay voice.

Joey laughed, going into the living room and plopping down on my sofa. Joey realized he sat on something and retrieved it from under him.

He looked at the cover and laughed. "So THIS is what you were up to while waiting for me to get here!"

"Fuck!" I swore under my breath, blushing. I thought I put those away. I snatched the other movie from Joey, putting it away.

"Shane, it's okay." Joey said, laughing lightly. "You're not the only one who watches romance movies."

"I know that, but how many guys watch them willingly?" I countered.

"I don't know." He said, shrugging. "But I'm sure there are some..."

"Joey, that's a bunch of bull shit and you know it." I said, sighing. "I just have to deal with the fact that I'm a 'crazy romance chick'."

"Shane, stop moping and let's get to videoing." Joey laughed at my dramatic tone.

I groan. "Fiinnee. But, only if you wear this." I grin evilly as I hold up a baggy 'I Love Shane Dawson' t-shirt.

Joey looks at the shirt and laughs. "W-where did you get that!?" He asked, still laughing.

I laugh too, tossing him the shirt. "Gurl, you will not believe the trouble I went through to get that." I say, talking like Shanaynay again.

"I mean, those damn fangirls wouldn't give it up! So, shot the damn bitches, tossed the nasty ass bodies in the trash and in that moment I just thought of you. You should be grateful! Those bitches' ruined my new clothes! But, man was I pissed when they got blood on my weave! Nobody touches my damn weave."

"Shane!" Joey says, trying not to laugh, failing.

"What? Those bitches be cray-cray, thinkin' they can be all up in my face and go touchin' my weave." I say, still in my Shanaynay voice.

"Wow Shane... Let's just get the video done." He laughed, pulling the shirt on.

"Okay." I agreed, getting the camera.

TBC...