"Prongs, I told you! It's taken from the stomach of a goat!" Remus said, shaking his head while looking at the parchment James had reluctantly shown him. He dropped his bag to the ground, and looked across the lake, hiding a grin.
"I didn't think you were serious!" James wailed, stuffing the potions paper – that had scored a "d" –into his bookbag. Just then, the eldest Black bounced up.
"Of course he's not Sirius!" He paused to allow himself a grin. "I am!"
James and Remus groaned and glanced at each other. Then, without warning, the both strode forward and seized Sirius. James grabbed Black by the shoulders, and Remus grabbed his feet. Peter just jumped around, giggling happily. He knew what was coming, but Sirius didn't.
"Guys-what- hey!" Sirius yelled, as Remus and James started to swing him back and forth.
"One!" Sirius swung forwards, then back again.
"Two!" Once again, Sirius swung forwards, then back again.
"Three! PITCH BLACK!" all of the Marauders (minus Sirius, who was screaming rather girlishly) shouted, and as they swung him forwards, James and Remus let go of Sirius, and we had lift off!
Sirius sailed through the air, screaming all the way. He was aware of students shouting and jumping out of the way as they saw the human missile coming at them, but all he was wondering was this: Why, in the name of Merlin's pants, did his friends throw him?
As the ground rushed up to meet him, it finally clicked. Pitch Black. Hah hah. Very funny. Really witty.
WHAM!
"Owww…" Sirius groaned, lifting his face out of the grass.
"Black?" a female voice said, and Sirius looked up to see Lily Evans gazing down at him with a small level of concern. "Are you alright?"
"I will be as soon as I change my name and kill those two," Sirius said as he got to his feet, and pointed to Remus and James, who were howling with laughter.
"What's your name got to do with anything?" Lily asked, clearly confused.
"Well, they think I over use the whole 'You're not Sirius, I am!' thing, so they came up with a new pun: pitch Black," Sirius said, scowling at his so-called friends who were coming over to make sure they hadn't broken any of his bones.
Lily stared at Sirius for a minuet, then burst out laughing. "Pitch Black!" she cackled. "Good one, James!" she called to James who froze where he stood. Lily walked past him, still laughing like mad.
"Glad you liked it!" Sirius called bitterly after her.
"She called me James!" James squealed.
Remus blinked.
"James, did you just… squeal?"
A/N: NAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I've been dying to write this for ages!
Instructions to find the picture that made me think this up:
Google "Tealin's Pottery Art"
Click on first result
Scroll down until you come to the character names.
Click on "Sirius Black"
Scroll down until you find "Pitch Black"
Click on it
View it and giggle
Isn't Tealin GOOD? She's got a billion other pics, check them out too!