Iron
Ted starts walking up to meet his "buyers" to get the night moving on and to make some quick cash before he goes out on the city.
"You have the stuff," stated one of the 3 buyers.
"Is that even a question," jokingly said Ted.
Ted walks back to his 87 Buick to get the fake drugs to give to the 3 men, and when he gets behind the car to open the trunk, he sneakily pulls out his phone and texts his good buddy Tony Stark a message stating "There are more people than I thought there would be, stay alert I might need a hand in getting out of this mess."
Within five minutes he can see Tony hovering over a close by building. Ted then starts walking back up to the dealers to trade the drugs for the large amount of cash.
The buyers were starting to get suspicious about ted, for he took a while to get the "Stuff" from the back of his car.
"Man, what took you so long to get your fuzzy ass back up here?" stated a buyer
"Buddy, look how tall I am, how the hell you think it would be easy for me to climb up in the trunk to get the drugs?"
"No need to be a smart ass bear. Can we get this deal done and get out of here I don't want to bring any attention on my people."
"The money?" commented Ted
The main buyer walks up and gives Ted the bag full of cash, in return he hands him the bag of "medical marijuana." They all walk back to their vehicles quickly due to a trespasser had seen them finishing the deal. After 5 minutes of driving Ted spots headlights racing upon him. Reacting to the threat Ted then puts the pedal to the metal and hauls ass trying to get onto the interstate to get away from what he is assuming the buyers.
"Tony! They are on to me get your metal figure down here and give me a hand!"
In response Tony flies next to the buyers vehicle and gives them a very welcoming surprise by lifting there car off the road and sets it down facing the opposite direction leaving them getting hit by 2 SUVs.
"How about that for some help you dumbass? What the hell went down, down there?"
"Well you see here I sold them chopped up skunk and some grass clippings from my front yard, damn that is funny I cannot believe they actually bought it!"
"You are the definition of a full blow retard there buddy…"
"I thought I was pretty clever!"
"How much did you make on this anyways? And what is my cut for bailing you out of a mess?"
"Well I only made 25,000 on this one; I will give you oh 12,000… How does that sound?"
"You're lucky I am a fan of you bear!"
A week goes by and Ted is living the high life showing of his hundo's. In the middle of the night, he hears rustling in his house and then feels a bag get thrown over his head and then being thrown in the back of a car. Remember Tony put a tracker in his stuffing he starts squeezing his belly trying to activate the sensor. He feels a vibration in his belly and realizes the tracker is activated. He can hear muffled voices and realizes the dealers all survived the crash!
Ted mumbles under his breath "you guys call yourselves buyers? What buyer doesn't check what he bought before driving away? Dumbass kids I tell ya."
"Hey bro we aint no kids, shut your damn mouth teddy bear."
"Oh okay tough guy."
The car speeds up and starts making sharp turns, and weaving in and out of traffic. Soon the car comes to a halt; ted is thrown on to a cold, hard concrete floor. There were so many loud noises he could not come to his senses where he was at. Then all of the sudden he is picked up again and slammed onto a cold metal table.
"Bet you aren't going to sell some stupid ass grass again is you bear?"
"Only to morons like you my friend." Stated ted
"Enough with the bullshit! I want my money back! When is that going to happen?"
Ted doesn't respond and then there is a loud slow ripping sound, at this moment ted is hoping Iron man is about here to get him out of this massive mess that he has gotten himself in to. Armless Teddy starts yelling he would do whatever it takes and to let him go. At this moment he hears a gun shot and a loud boom and iron man barges into the room.
"If I were you I would sew that arm back on their buddy or you are going to be sewing your own back on."
The buyer throws the stuffed arm at iron man and then starts firing his gun at him, quickly Tony grabs ted and hauls out of the room at full blast attempting to get him back to the safe house. 20 minutes later they come upon the safe house and ted gets his arm sewed back on by Tony's personal robotic doctor.
"What were you thinking Ted?"
"I don't know man they got through my security system somehow and I was asleep and then next thing I know I am being thrown in the back of a car."
"How much do you owe them to get it to where they will leave you alone?"
"Well double what they gave me…" stated Ted nervously
"And how do you expect to get that back ted?"
"Well I say we need some team work, I mean you did take half of what I made off the deal."
"No way in hell, I saved your furry ass twice now. I earned that money."
"Okay tony please just help me get out of this rough patch it is what best friends are for right?"
Tony in disbelief of him even getting asked to help walks out of the room and just goes up to bed to sleep and think more of the question. Ted sits on the operating table and thinks to himself of different ways he could make 50,000 dollars in two weeks. Ted thinks all night about what he could do, then the light bulb flicks on. He could destroy the buyer's ego by setting them up by a bigger seller. The following day comes around and Ted very politely mentions the idea he has to Tony to get his input.
"So Tony I think we should get back at them for ripping off my arm…"
"You're the dumbass that thought it would be a good idea to give them fake weed in the first place, in my opinion Teddy you kind of deserved it in a way."
"You are a true friend you know. If my self-esteem wasn't just destroyed I would have given you some money from this go around. You really are a true millionaire dick just so you know."
"Okay so here is the deal, I will help you get this "deal" done and over with, so you can get out of your debt, although I think it would be funny to see you lose another arm just saying."
"Oh real funny, laughing so hard."
So Ted calls up the main dealer and gets a date set up for the big sale to make the 50,000 he owes the Mexican buyers. After the date is set he calls the Mexican buyers and continues to tell them what is going on. As soon as he gets off the phone he comes to tell ted that they need to get to cutting grass and finding a skunk. On top of the drug deal to make it look logical they do spend some money on getting a pound of Marijuana to sell to the buyers along with the fake.
"Ted… so how long have you been making money like this?"
"Well you see, I usually just make out of state sales and you know it's pretty damn hard to find a Teddy bear just randomly walking around."
"Yeah true, well I hope this thing goes well because if not we going to be finding ourselves in screwed up situation."
"Just trust me on this one, I will not screw it up I promise Tony, you got to believe me man."
"Alright well I am wearing my suit just in case things get outa hand."
"Oh yeah like that won't be suspicious at all…"
"I am not going to be down in that situation, I am going to be the eyes in the sky my friend."
"That is perfect."
"I swear to god if they rip off another arm I am going to be one pissed off teddy bear."
"LOL ted don't make me laugh."
After two weeks of getting the drugs set up, the due date has come. Tonight will be the night we find out if ted is smart or not. Within time the Mexican buyer s pick ted up a long with the 50,000 dollars in weed.
Main buyer "this better not be a set up this time bear, you owe us too much money to be screwing around."
"I know man you can trust me on this one why would I screw this all up again?"
"Well knowing what you sold us last time I have no doubt in you lying to us."
As they pull up to the meet they send Ted out to meet the so called alpha buyer. As ted is walking up dragging the bags along with him the buyers suspiciously go through the bags to confirm the sale. After the bags are searched and confirmed the Mexicans get out of the vehicles to walk up and claim the money. The buyer hands over the money not to ted but just to the Mexicans. As they start to walk away the brother of the Alpha finds one of the bags has fake weed.
Alpha "This is a set up! Kill them now!"
Shots began to fire and just as he assumed iron man came in to the rescue of ted which the new buyers seemed to not fire upon. The Mexicans in awe come out and start firing at the man in the iron suit, in one big bang iron man fires a shot and blows up their bodies along with their vehicles.
"Iron man snickered and said well at least they are where they belong now buddy."
"Why didn't you just do that in the first place?"
"Well you see I didn't think I was going to need it the other night so weight reduction came in to mind."
"Oh well good thing you brought it tonight man, or we would have been shit out of luck."
"Well a smart man never comes un prepared."
They get back to starks house and Tony realizes that Ted had a black bag dangling from his foot.
"Ted what is it that you have there?"
"I am not sure I went for a bag laying there just to get a souvenir for some memory of this you know."
Ted and tony sit there staring at the bag anxiously to figure out what was actually in it. Tony being stubborn as usual did not let Ted open the bag.
"So here is what we are going to do ted, whatever is in the bag we split in half."
"Okay deal now let's open the damn bag."
They start unzipping the bag and leave the flap closed until it is all the way unzipped. They open the bag to find 25,000 dollars.
"You have got to be shitting me ted."
"Oh my god tony how the hell did I manage to get the right bag?"
"Ted I will go on any run you ask, lets start running and getting this money."
So ted and tony soon come to be the runners of the big city, they are now moving up to be the Alphas in the city. Within two months they became millionaires from the 25,000 that they stole in the fake deal.