Disclaimer: Hell, if Naruto were mine, you wouldn't find it on its usual air time! Because it would've a lot, a lot, a lot of adult scene! Believe it! Thanks to Kishimoto-sensei to own it, because if something goes wrong, all the threats and anger would be delivered right to his studio. MUWAHAHAHA!
English is not my mother language. Any critics and comment is welcomed. As usual, the fic took place after Naruto finally dragged back Sasuke at the age of 16. They're 19 now. And yes, they're married.
And NOOOO, I'm not Orochimaru! I do like cute boys and cute girls, but I don't go that wayyy……besides, I'm a girl, a girl…!
Bro : which make thing even worse…
BF : (smack his head) shut up!
Bro : … (narrowed his eyes) mumble wumble
BF : By the way, it's NaruSasu (I don't type it wrong, it's SasUke), a bit hint of Mpreg, since the babies has born. How many babies? Count it yourself khukhukhu…
Bro : Sasu is not gay (still narrowed his eyes)
BF : (smack his head) Shut up or I'll take back the Itachi plushie. Now on with the fic.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Which One was Born First?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Uchiha Mansion.
Uzumaki Naruto was still standing in the living room.
He frowned.
The living room was big enough, and it also colored in white, which made the room look even wider. There was a fireplace with red bricks motives on it. There was a big white couch in the middle of the room, right in front of the fireplace. On the right wall, there was a big bookcase full with books and scrolls. There were some antic vases on the lamp table. On the other wall, there were also some paintings from famous artist in the past. And you could see stair which connected to second floor when you walked out of the room.
Naruto still frowned.
Come on, what's wrong with the room? The curtain has cream color, which fit the room color. It was relaxing and comforting!
No, that's not the problem.
The couch was big enough, there was also a wide screen plasma TV in front of it, so you can enjoy your day off!
No, that's also not the problem.
The carpet was soft and has a nice motive on it. It could keep you warm even it was winter now!
But that's still not the reason why Naruto frowned.
If you followed Naruto's gaze, you'll see that Naruto frowned at the couch. What's wrong with the couch? Naruto than pulled out a black colored marker, waterproof one. And began to walk near the couch, facing the couch, bowed his head a bit toward the couch…
Wait…I know what are you thinking about. You'll suspect that Naruto is going to use his so-called king-of-pranksters skill on the innocent couch, wouldn't you? Nyahahaha…… No, you're wrong…evil grin
…facing the couch, bowed his head a bit toward the couch, no, toward the bundles that sat peacefully on the couch.
There were nine bundles of white towels on the couch.
Naruto widened his eye a bit, try to differ one bundle from another. Again, he failed, and frowned again. They all looked the same…
He let out a heavy sigh, and opened the marker's cap, then ready to…
"Naruto, put that down!"
Luckily, (well, which means unluckily for Naruto) the house owner has just walked down the stair. The Uchiha stopped at the doorstep and pointed dangerously to Naruto's right hand, which still held an uncapped black waterproof marker.
Naruto immediately froze and blinked. Looks like that certain finger could burst out fire jutsu without any hand sign!
"Put. That. Down." Uchiha Sasuke repeated. A vein almost popped on his head.
Sasuke wore his usual high collar blue T-shirt, with the Uchiha emblem under the collar. His damp hair indicates that he has just had a shower. The black trousers hung lazily on his waist. One hand on his hip, when the other still pointed to Naruto, in a very deadly threat…
"B-B-But, Sasuke! It's hard to memorize them all, unless it has something on it! Like number or …"
"Naruto." Sasuke growled with a low tone. Naruto flinched and quickly recap the marker, but still held it in his hand. It was a bad idea though.
Sasuke scoffed, and then walked slowly towards Naruto. The Sharingan ™ almost activated. Naruto could feel it and jumped back a bit. Oh, God!
"Hands. That. Marker. To. Me. Naruto."
"……………………… (Gasp! He looks scary!)"
So, defeated, Naruto gave him the marker, and quickly pulled his hand back. Who know Sasuke might've chop down the blond's hand, if he wasn't careful. Sasuke put the marker into his pocket securely and patted it. Make sure Naruto wouldn't be able to get his hand on it.
"Naruto, babies head are not whiteboard." (blink.blink. It's you blinkin'. Not Naruto, neither Sasuke). "If you want to write, then try to write down your cell phone number on Sakura's. If it's washable, maybe I would let you write…"
Let me remind you, the marker is the water-proof one.
Which means it isn't washable.
That's if Sakura let him write on her forehead. You know her…er, fist.
"B-but, Sasuke, it's hard to remember their names! So, before I forgot which one is who, it's better to number them first!"
Sasuke turned his head to Naruto. Hands on his hip. Eyes narrowed.
"Naruto, they're already two months old, and you still can't remember their names yet?" Sasuke shook his head. Can't believe he has fall for this dobe.
Then he leaned down and picked up one of nine white bundles. He held it close to his body, and began to rock it gently. The baby opened his bright blue eyes and let out a small chuckle, raised one small hand and almost touched his daddy's nose. Sasuke smiled and kissed the baby's cheek, and then picked up a bottle of milk. Sasuke pushed the tip to the baby's mouth. The baby sucked it hungrily and swallowed the whole white milky content. (Hmm…I think it sounds a bit wrong…o.o can't figure out why though…maybe it's just me…sweatdrop)
"Sigh……they're nine of them." Naruto scratched his scarred cheek. "Each of them has unique name. Why don't you give them easier one, like Taro, Jiro, Saburo…"
Sasuke frowned at those too-simple and seemingly retarded names. (A/N: No offense to the people who has those names, but he's Uchiha, you know him…)
"Dobe, if you want to blame someone, blame yourself for impregnate me with nine kits…" Sasuke rubbed his head, Kyuubi is the one to be blamed too, since Kyuubi called them 'grand-kits' (A/N: grand-kits! Mwahahaha, that's made Tsunade looks very oooooold !) "…I mean nine babies. Since I take care of them even before they were born, I have a right to name them."
"But you only give birth to the last four…" Naruto murmured.
"Yes, so Itachi named the first five, since he carried the first five." (1)
"Uuuuuhhh…it's not fair, I wanted to name them, too…!" Naruto wailed childishly.
"No way. You've agreed that they're Uchihas since they carried mine and Itachi's blood. So we named them."
"Saaaaaaaasukeeeeee……! But I have a part in it, too!"
"Dobe, of course they are yours, too." Sasuke answered softly to his spouse. "But I just can't let you name them. Last month, I just can't sleep when you said you want to name them with one of your favorite food." Sasuke shook his head.
Just imagine it.
Ramen Uchiha, Curry Uchiha, Sushi Uchiha, Spaghetti Uchiha.
All the silly names you could get from a Naruto.
"Sigh, yeah, I'm just a bit exited that time. I don't mean to harm the baby's future…"
Sasuke send him a you-really-are-a-moron-go-jump-yourself-off-the-cliff-or-I'll-cut-off-your-balls-choped-it-in-cubes-and-serve-it-as-dinner glare.
"Aw, Sasuke! Don't start teach them with The Uchiha™ Glare! They're waaaaaay too young for that!" Naruto put a defense hands in front of his chest, as if giving distance from each other. He was definitely hasn't prepared to face 9 pairs of Uchiha's Death Glare, no, wait, there's Sasuke, make it ten, especially if he went home late from Hokage Tower for dinner. Being the Rokudaime still can not save his ass from the internal problem, such as family dinner time.
"Hn." Sasuke just closed his eyes and bowed his head slightly. He still knew what the best for his children, better than Naruto of course. Sasuke nuzzled the baby's cheek and whispering something.
"Phew……" Naruto wiped the cold sweat that has just formed on his forehead. How Naruto hoped that Itachi and Kisame were still here. They always managed to calm Sasuke down (mostly from strangle Naruto to death), especially Kisame, who always talked wisely and reasonable. Well, for example, when Sasuke is about to punch Naruto into bloody pulp for being stupid for the nth time, Kisame would always took the trouble to remind him that Naruto is Sasuke's spouse, which is also father of their children. "You must think of the children, Sasuke-san. They'll be sad when they know their father was killed by their mother over a dinner." Kisame said. And that stopped Sasuke successfully, Naruto will sigh of relief, and Itachi will just chuckled secretly watching the whole scene. That happened often.
But now, Itachi and Kisame must back on their duty spying on Akatsuki. Sigh.
"Sigh, Naruto, you're really helpless." Sasuke put down the baby to the couch gently. The baby has just slept back.
"Huh?" Naruto snapped back from his thought.
"Listen, I'll only tell you once this time. So remember it carefully."
Naruto nervously walked closer to the couch and gulped. Sasuke began to tell the names from the first born.
"This one is Ryuuichi." A black haired baby boy, with black opal eyes and pale white skin.
"…er, Ryuuichi…"
"Kazuya." A bright blue eyed baby boy, with black hair and a bit tan skin.
"…ah, he's asleep…"
"Mikoto." A black haired baby girl, with dark eyes and cute pink lips, which reminds Itachi a lot to his dearest deceased mother.
"…she's beautiful…"
"Homura." A blond haired baby boy, and has a pair of dark midnight eyes and also a pair of strong arms and legs. Sasuke believed that this one has started practicing since it was in Itachi's belly, the right side to be precise. Well, that's Naruto for you.
"Mmm, he looked just like me…" Naruto grinned.
"Aiko." Kisame loved this baby girl, since it gave him the least trouble when moving the first five babies from Sasuke to Itachi. It has black hair, black orb eyes, and tan skin.
"…mm, Itachi's last one.."
"Akira." The one which resembled Sasuke the most, black haired and black eyed boy. Didn't cry often and only blinked his eyes when hungry.
"This one looks just like you." Naruto frowned at the baby then shift his gaze to Sasuke. Sasuke just simply ignored him.
"Hikaru." The one which resembled Naruto the most, blond haired and sky blue eyed boy. So annoying and cried very loud. Something you really need for life.
"Heheheheh…" Naruto grinned nervously. Sasuke glared hard at him.
"Sakura." Named after Haruno Sakura, their teammate, because she helped them a lot during the pregnancy period, especially the shopping part. The baby has a pair of bright blue eye, blond hair, and a big, wide forehead, which made Sasuke spent a hell of time just to push her out.
"Yeah, I really remember this one." Naruto flinched a bit when he remembered how Sasuke almost broke the blonde's arm and cursing a lot that time.
"Yuuki." The baby girl with the skin as white as the winter snow, dark blue eye and even darker blue hair. She also has smaller body among her siblings.
"She looks like snow princess…"
"Remember all the names yet? It's not that unique, so it's not hard to memorize them all." Now Sasuke wondered which one inherited Naruto's idiocy. Hopefully no. He just didn't want to spend some more money on aspirin. Better milk or diaper than that.
"……um…" Looks like Naruto still have some problems.
"Well, just memorized it well…" Sasuke picked up another bundle and started to nursing Mikoto. "Maybe I'll make a quiz from it, and if you forgot just one name, you'll not getting any from me from that day on…"
Naruto looked really shocked. Oh My God, The Horror!
Sasuke saw Naruto looked like an ice stone statue, with a mixed color of blue, green, and white. Maybe he has gone too far.
"I'm not serious, Dobe…"
At this word, Naruto melt down and breathe for the first time since he was frozen over. You could see a rainbow with seven colors above his head, some kind of crashing ocean waves, and some angels dancing around. No, it is not genjutsu. He just spent too much time with a pair of green spandex.
"Sometimes…"Naruto finally spoke,"…sometimes you're so mean, Sasuke-teme…" Naruto plopped down on the carpet, crossed his leg and put both arm beside him supporting his weight.
"I'm not mean. It's just you being too idiot."
"Hmph, then you're more idiot than me. It's you who keep askin' me to be the father…" Naruto folded his arm and pouted. The pink lip stuck out as far as he could.
Shit. Sasuke thought. Why he always do this when I have something in my arm? Last time when his hands were free from any objects, he, well, let just say he kiss the pout away from the other boy then and there. But now, he could only lick his dried lips, and tried hard to think something else to get rid the images that might come up any second. Luckily, he has thought up something brilliant enough—if you asked him, and it was related to the difficulty which Naruto currently has about memorizing babies names.
"Fine, Dobe. I think I've found out how to make you be able to recognize each baby."
"Oh?" Naruto glanced up with round curios blue eyes.
Sasuke put down Mikoto, who has finished drinking her milk (now that sounds better :) ) and walked to another room. No longer than a minute, he came back holding a pile of red and blue fabrics and a box which contain sewing kits. And being a very skillful (cough) wife (cough) -- as Naruto always said, he began to make something. He finished in 20 minutes, and walked towards the white couch, where the nine bundles sat there peacefully. He put that something on each baby's wrist. The babies chuckled and giggled, obviously very happy to receive hand-made present from their daddy. Hikaru, the one who resembled Naruto a lot, waved his hands energetically, and sometimes try to pry the thing off from his wrist.
Naruto scooted closer to the couch, and his face brighten, amazed with Sasuke's handiwork. Now each baby has a wristband. It was red for girls and blue for boys. Each wristband has the name of the owner.
If Kisame were here, he would have sighed and said how lucky Naruto was for having a person so caring like Sasuke. And Itachi would've hug Sasuke, spun him around, and said how proud he is as a big brother.
"Woow…this is awesome! You're really amazing, Sasuke!" Naruto's eyes still looking full attention at each wristband and read the names, still amazed.
At this, Sasuke blushed a bit. "Shut up, Dobe. It's not that big deal. Everyone could do that." He picked up all spare fabrics along with the sewing kit and put them in another room. When he came back, he has brought a tray of bottled milks, and put it on a small table besides the couch. Sasuke was about to give Homura the milk when a small rustle of jacket was heard.
"Ano, Sasuke…" Naruto scratched his back hair, grinned sheepishly, but looked a bit confused.
"Mmm……?" Sasuke looked up.
"…so, which one was born first?"
Oh.
My.
God.
-owari-
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: I wrote this fic when my professor was explaining about shits called demand and supply curves, along with the marginal…marginal…ah, to hell with them! I just get frustrated, took out a piece of paper, and voila, a fic done! (After 5-6 times checking back the translated words).
This is actually a side fic, but my hands are being too itchy, so I decided to post it first before the unfinished main fic "Barbie Doll no Jutsu", which stuck on its 29th page. Probably I'll never post that fic since it's unfinished and so didn't make sense sigh but there's but :P. As always, critics and compliments are welcomed. Howler and love letter will be ignored. Nah, ignore the last sentence. XD
Love it? Hate it? Please review! Maybe I'll post the Barbie Doll no Jutsu, well, who knows MUWAHAHAHAAHA! XDDD
(1) Due a special jutsu, Sasuke was pregnant with nine babies. Since it could be very dangerous for both Sasuke and the babies, Kisame decided to move the first five babies from Sasuke to Itachi (since Itachi also carried the blood of last Uchihas). And that make Naruto has 2 sexy yet drop dead gorgeous wifes (squeal like a crazy fangirl)! Yeah, this is also the main plot for Barbie Doll no Jutsu.
BTW, I've lost some sense of humor in writing fanfic since I started my English course…(chanting the s-word inside her head) I really need crazy fics to enlighten my mood (bows) Thanks for reading. BF.