Dedicated to Tutaria, (tuh-tah-ria) who ships Johnlock like mad. Just a short little thing, because I noticed that while Sherlock says that girlfriends aren't really his area, he doesn't exactly say that boyfriends aren't either. He just says that he's not interested in relationshipping. It feels like a betrayal to my Sherlock OTP to say that, but whatevs.
So yeah, this is for you Tutaria because I know it will make you happy.
Enjoy!
This one was the one.
This man, this stupidly simple and broken doctor was the one.
He had to be.
Sherlock felt it. He felt it in John Watson's over-compensated grip in their handshake. Military background, unfriendly to hostile environment for sexual divergence from reproductive norms, large machismo factors pressuring towards strong manliness over gentler sensitivity. Bluffing.
Sherlock saw it. He saw it in the appraising and appreciative glance John Watson spared him when he first entered the lab. Automatic sweep of room looking for potential mates, discerning eye towards height and masculinity, quick switch of focus after appraisal is made and approved of. Hiding.
Sherlock heard it. He heard it in the self-conscious panic in John Watson's voice when Mrs. Hudson suggested they might need only one bedroom. Nervous of suggested relationship, irrationally defensive against assumptions made by an older, overly accepting woman. Denial.
Sherlock tasted it. He tasted it in the perfect tea that John Watson made later that night. Personal life is formed from precision in execution, cannot slip even a moment out of fear of rejection or mockery, cannot turn it off even for a second while making tea. No, not denial—knows full well, yet unwilling to admit it aloud just yet.
If Sherlock hadn't already been fully convinced that John Watson was the man of his dreams, the stilted conversation at Angelo's would have given him everything he needed. But John would need time, he concluded from the evidence, and so while Sherlock came out to him easily and openly—not really my area—he also put John off the trail. He let his new flatmate relax, knowing there would be time enough to have John fall in love but at the moment there was the case and this pressed far more heavily on Sherlock than the fact that Mike Stamford had stumbled on probably the only man in existence who could love Sherlock Holmes the way he wanted to be loved.
He reckoned it would be about four months before he convinced John that they really did only need one bedroom.
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