Junkrat lay back on the bed, acutely aware of the weight of Symmetra straddling his waist, but also feeling an uncharacteristic spark of trepidation. They'd talked about this... planned it even, but now he found himself here he felt a little less certain than he had been before. She bent forward, planting an encouraging kiss to his lips and he remembered why he'd agreed to this in the first place.
Junkrat smiled and stretched upward to snatch another, bumping noses in his clumsiness. She laughed. It was always the sweetest sound to him, warm and strangely throaty. Made him think of hot coals smouldering in the darkness.
She pushed him back down gently. "Are you going to behave?"
"Course I am, ain't gotta ask twice. I'm all yours," he promised, grinning in what he hoped was a suggestive way.
He extended his arms above his head, back against the headboard, and kept them still as her hands moved, weaving blue light into being. The bonds closed around his wrists almost immediately and locked him in place. Trapped.
That was when the nausea hit. He knew it was senseless, that it was only him and Symmetra here, that nothing else should matter, but every instinct in him screamed at him to get out, warning of pain he knew would not be forthcoming, of danger that didn't exist...
Perhaps she noticed the way he tensed, or how his eyes widened not with excitement but with a fear he'd thought himself long passed. Whatever it was she waved her hands and the bonds dissolved.
Junkrat pulled his arms back to his chest, breathing shakily.
"Sorry, I don't think I can-"
"It's alright."
"I know you was hopin'-"
"Jamie, it's alright," she said again, softer, and she reached out to run comforting fingers through his hair. He leaned into the touch, letting the tension slowly drain from his body. The room felt quiet, and there was only the two of them here, just him and Symmetra gently stroking his hair and no threat in sight. Safe. For a minute he just lay there, listening to his heart settling back into it's normal rhythm.
"Sorry," he repeated, nuzzling against her hand, "would'a said somethin' earlier if I knew. Didn't mean to disappoint."
She shifted, settling on top of him so that her arms were folded across his chest and her dark eyes were watching him. "This was an idea, nothing more. I would draw no satisfaction from something you did not likewise enjoy, it's you that matters to me, not this. And you are not a disappointment."
He'd never understand how she could look at him and see anything more than a bloody mess... still, he couldn't deny how giddy her words always made him feel. Hesitantly he allowed his arms to snake around her, drawing her closer. "Ya say the sweetest things sometimes," he murmured, planting kisses up her neck. She seemed to enjoy the attention. He took a tentative nibble and he felt her laugh as much as heard it.
"I say them because they are true."
"Hmmm." He pulled back slightly, drinking in the sight of her - her smooth skin and long, silky hair, her delicately arched eyebrows, the particular curve of her smile. Perfect, in every way.
He was struck by the urge to say something, but he found himself fumbling for what that might be.
"I ever tell ya I love ya? Cos I do, ya know, you're bloody amazing, an' I don't just mean in bed, heh..." His brows knit together in a frown, frustrated that he couldn't quite seem to find the right words to express what he wanted. They felt pale in comparison, empty, with none of the sentiment he wanted covey. He wanted to tell her beautiful things, to weave words on his tongue with same deftness he used to assemble his bombs, but they got tangled up and he'd never been one for fancy talk anyway. All he could do was tell it plainly, and hope that she could read the sincerity in eyes. "I really love ya... just want you to know that."
Symmetra's smile widened. "I suppose you can be sweet sometimes too."
"If ya still wanna try-"
Her hand reached out to cup his face, making sure his gaze was fixed on hers. "I told you it's alright."
"Well, could still tie you up," he suggested with a sly grin. "Reckon I could do that if ya like, ain't opposed to the idea."
She let out an amused little hum. "It would be an interesting experiment," she permitted, "but not tonight."
Her thumb traced the contours of his cheek, leisurely, as if mapping it out, and he nipped at her fingers playfully.
"What are we doin' tonight then?"
"Tonight... tonight let's not worry about that," she said, tapping him on the nose as if to chide him. "Tonight it's just you and me and whatever you want to make happen."
"Whatever I want, eh?" Junkrat asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Mmmm," she agreed, leaning in for a kiss. He indulged her, and she let her fingers stray back to his hair, running across his scalp in the way she knew he loved. He let out a soft appreciative sound, and she pulled away, a twinkle in her eyes. "I'm sure you can think of something."