Complications
By Ael L. Bolt
Summary: The third in the "Visitor" miniseries. James Kirk and Julian Bashir once again join forces to convince Allison to continue writing Star Trek fics, but two other characters get in the way.
Author's Notes: The first name mentioned for each character will be the one used outside of dialogue, regardless of whether or not it is their "real" or "official" name. Try to make sure you know which James is which. ;)
~~~~~~
She chuckled as she pulled up a new Microsoft Word document, and typed in WORLD OF SILENCE by AEL L. BOLT at the top. Taking a swig of Sobe Dragon, she began to type away furiously.
~~~~~~
"Okay, seriously, WHAT exactly is your PROBLEM?!"
She glanced at the clock and smirked. 1:15 AM, on the dot. She swiveled her chair to face the rather irate captain. "Wow, JT, fancy meeting YOU here of all places."
"Oh, just shut the hell up and answer the question," he snapped, irritated.
"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," she denied cheerfully.
"Did your Star Trek muse run away or what?"
She giggled. "Well, yes, you did seem to go AWOL awhile back."
While he was busy blinking at her in confusion, someone else made his grand entrance. "Hell, girl, you obsess over me, turn me into a Trill in one fic, a six-year-old in your next, and a psychopathic murderer in yet another, and then you just let me SIT THERE? You have some screwy priorities." He glanced over at the goldshirted man. "Oh, hey again Jim."
"'lo Jules," Jim grumbled.
"Well well well," she smirked at the new arrival. "The Prodigal Muse makes his triumphant return. Can I get you anything? A raktajino, a game of darts, perhaps a steamy romance with Jadzia?"
"Now look h-" He halted in midword, blinking at her last offer. "Wh...h...n...oiugh?!"
She cackled manically at his stupefyed expression, and waved a hand in front of his face to make doubly sure the catatonic trance had set in perfectly well. Satisfied, she nodded and shoved him to sitting position against the far wall. "Well, now I've only got one angry pawn to worry about."
As if on cue, a young black-haired boy appeared out of nowhere, holding an old boot and muttering something about shoving Portkeys up a certain professor's nose. Impossibly green eyes glared at her from behind thick black glasses, and his hair was perfectly messy enough to partially cover a lightning-bolt scar over his right eye. "Alright, what gives?" he demanded of her.
"Jeez, HJ, sit down before you strain something," she said calmly. "Aren't you normally the quiet, soft-spoken one of the group?"
"Usually," HJ admitted grumpily, taking a seat next to the still-zoned-out Jules. "But come on, you made up an entire book filled with nothing but short tidbits of what you want to do to me. Even if none of it is published except the first chapter, I know the rest so far. Hell, do you have to introduce me to so many AU fics at once? I have a hard time remembering from minute to minute whether I'm a Phoenixan, or a dragon-boy, or even just a Ravenclaw. I mean, seriously! No, no, not my godfather, I...you know what I mean." He eyed the other two warily. "And then I show up here and you've already got two weirdos present."
"The more, the merrier!" she smirked, and Jim snorted in outrage. "Hey, at least I haven't had the Dursleys torture you or anything, like those other authors. Or had you turn to the Dark Side. ASIDE FROM the whole heir of Slytherin thing," she added quickly. "But you have to admit, everyone's thought of it anyway. I think I'm the first one who's done THAT, though."
"True, but...decapitating Hermione was not fun in the slightest."
"You didn't object at the time."
"I swear you must've drugged me or something. There is no way I would've agreed to that, were I in my right mind."
"Actually, since you're right-handed, you'd be in your left mind," she rattled off effortlessly.
HJ blinked, glared, and then sighed. "Mental note to self: never argue with a borderline Ravenclaw."
"And anyway, WOLFCLAW, I wouldn't think you'd turn down these nifty powers I give you in my latest," she teased. "You could REALLY use a healing factor. Madame Pomfrey won't always be there to hold your hand, ya know."
A knock came at the door. So unexpected this was, that Ael and her guests hardly knew how to react. After a shocked moment, she grabbed Jim and shoved him in the cloest, then threw a blanket and some plushies on top of HJ and Jules. "Make no noise and pretend that you don't exist," she hissed under her breath, and then opened the door.
The man on the other side was her exact height (five foot three - and if you DARE make any short jokes I'll hex you, and I mean it!!!!), except with an odd wolf-ear hairstyle and peculiarly overgrown sideburns. "Mind if I come in there, tyke?" he growled, leaning casually on the doorframe.
She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, hurry up." She closed the door behind him, then whipped the stuffed-animal-covered blanket off the odd duo, and dragged Jim out of the closet. "False alarm, guys. It's just James."
Jim gave her an odd look as he brushed cobwebs and dust bunnies off his uniform. "I thought *I* was James."
"No no, I mean James Howlett," she assured him.
HJ stared at the newcomer. "Err...you look so familiar. That's very, very frightening."
James blinked down at the scrawny teenager. "That's puttin' it mildly, bub. Hey Ael, you got any beer?"
She glared at him. "No hard stuff in MY house, Wolvie. And no, no cigars either. Here, have a Sobe, they've been sitting in my window all night. Should be plenty cold." She handed him a glass bottle, and he blinked at it in confusion. "So, James, what brings you here?"
He smirked. "What, I can't just show up and have a chat with my newest admirer?" He made a slashing motion with his left wrist, and with a glint of cold silver, the cap of the Sobe fell off, split neatly in half. He sniffed at it, made an odd face at the scent, but drank it anyway. "Actually, tyke, if you must know, I'm worried that you'll start invading my multiverse. See, I've heard about your reputation involvin' treatment of characters like myself, especially those with unusual abilities, if you get my drift." He eyed the other three suspiciously.
Ael laughed. "Don't worry, James. Everyone else in this room has odd abilities, whether they be canon or not. As a matter of fact, HJ over there has had some of yours." HJ looked embarassed by the sudden attention. "Er..."
Ael slapped her forehead. "Oh, I feel so stupid. I haven't made any introductions at all, have I?" She turned to the first two arrivals, then disregarded the second at the sight of his continuing trance. "James Kirk, you already know Julian Bashir," at which she lightly kicked the catatonic doctor, "but I don't believe you've met either of these. This is Harry James Potter-" ("Too many Jameses!" complained Kirk) "-and James Howlett, aka Logan, aka Wolverine." She paused. "Well, actually, Harry goes by many names...the Boy Who Lived, Yami no Ryuu, Lord Phoenixae, Heir of Gryffindor, Heir of Slytherin, Whitestripe, Bolt, Wolfclaw, and sometimes even Heracles Potter." She sniggered at Harry, who fumed at the last one.
"I told you, I'm just Harry!"
"Hey, would you prefer those zany authors who think your name is Heron? Or maybe Harold?" She made a face. "I've got an uncle named Harold. Unless you want to be a balding motorcycle fanatic who's impossible to put up with and has the most bizarrely-skewed logic, don't go along with that one."
She abruptly stood up. "I'm sneaking out to the kitchen for a late-night Pop Tart. Don't kill each other while I'm gone." And with that, she swept out of the room.
The four characters sat in the room, staring blankly at each other (well, except Jules; he was still in a trance). Finally, Jim broke the silence. "So...she mentioned powers that you two possess?"
James grunted in affirmative, and made a fist. Three nine-inch adamantium blades instantly snapped out between his knuckles. "Got these babies a ways back, along with a skeleton of this stuff. Indestructible. Not to mention a healing factor and enhanced senses."
Jim's eyes narrowed. "Exactly how enhanced?"
James took one sniff in Jim's direction. "Well, I can tell that your last girlfriend wasn't human...smells like maybe you were with her last two weeks ago, perhaps?"
Jim gaped at him. "Okay, that's fairly enhanced. Even Bashir here doesn't have quite THAT degree of sensitivity." Seeing that James had no other powers to speak of, he looked over at HJ. "What about you, kid?"
"Officially, in canon I'm just a wizard," HJ informed him. "Yes, as in magic. I'm still a student, though. In canon, that is. As far as Ael's concerned, I'm practically a demigod. She's given me shapeshifting ability beyond that of the Animagus, very odd linguistic skills, an odd curse that turns me into a malnourished half-dragon, incredible skill with a certain sword, and this guy's powers," he added, pointing to James. "Not all at once, mind you, but still." He shrugged. "What about you?"
"Eh, I've had a variety. Shapeshifting, wings, spirit transferral - I spent quite some time as a lizard, immortality, ability to speak beyond the grave, and even went so far as to make me a talking lion." He looked down at Jules. "This guy I'm not so sure about. He's genetically enhanced in canon, but Ael's done some freaky things with him. Not sure what they are, and we can't exactly ask him at present."
Ael came back in with a package of Pop Tarts. "Ah, you're mingling!" she said, pleased. "Good." She threw herself into her computer chair and spun it around a few times. "Now then," she said, rubbing her hands together with a smile on her face, "what exactly do you wish of me?"
"Bashir and I want you to finish writing," Jim declared.
"I want you to STOP writing about me," HJ added. "Or at least slow down on the AUs."
"And I just want written proof that you won't be after me next," James drawled.
"Hmm." Ael assumed a thinking pose, and tapped her chin in thought. She pulled out a scrap of parchment and a quill, and scribbled a quick note. "Here, you've got my written word," she said, folding it into a paper airplane and flying it over to James. He snatched it out of the air, and instantly disappeared. "Next customer!"
She circled HJ for a minute, and the boy wizard looked distinctly nervous by her actions. "Hmm...how about this? I'll send you to another fandom. Give you a nice break from all my insanity."
HJ's face expressed his relief. "That'd be great, thanks!"
"Don't mention it." She tossed him a Lego starship, and he disappeared as well.
Ael turned to Jim with a smirk on her face. "You might want to go back home; I'm not making any promises. Besides, poor HJ will probably crash your ship while you're gone. Ta!"
End!
By Ael L. Bolt
Summary: The third in the "Visitor" miniseries. James Kirk and Julian Bashir once again join forces to convince Allison to continue writing Star Trek fics, but two other characters get in the way.
Author's Notes: The first name mentioned for each character will be the one used outside of dialogue, regardless of whether or not it is their "real" or "official" name. Try to make sure you know which James is which. ;)
~~~~~~
She chuckled as she pulled up a new Microsoft Word document, and typed in WORLD OF SILENCE by AEL L. BOLT at the top. Taking a swig of Sobe Dragon, she began to type away furiously.
~~~~~~
"Okay, seriously, WHAT exactly is your PROBLEM?!"
She glanced at the clock and smirked. 1:15 AM, on the dot. She swiveled her chair to face the rather irate captain. "Wow, JT, fancy meeting YOU here of all places."
"Oh, just shut the hell up and answer the question," he snapped, irritated.
"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," she denied cheerfully.
"Did your Star Trek muse run away or what?"
She giggled. "Well, yes, you did seem to go AWOL awhile back."
While he was busy blinking at her in confusion, someone else made his grand entrance. "Hell, girl, you obsess over me, turn me into a Trill in one fic, a six-year-old in your next, and a psychopathic murderer in yet another, and then you just let me SIT THERE? You have some screwy priorities." He glanced over at the goldshirted man. "Oh, hey again Jim."
"'lo Jules," Jim grumbled.
"Well well well," she smirked at the new arrival. "The Prodigal Muse makes his triumphant return. Can I get you anything? A raktajino, a game of darts, perhaps a steamy romance with Jadzia?"
"Now look h-" He halted in midword, blinking at her last offer. "Wh...h...n...oiugh?!"
She cackled manically at his stupefyed expression, and waved a hand in front of his face to make doubly sure the catatonic trance had set in perfectly well. Satisfied, she nodded and shoved him to sitting position against the far wall. "Well, now I've only got one angry pawn to worry about."
As if on cue, a young black-haired boy appeared out of nowhere, holding an old boot and muttering something about shoving Portkeys up a certain professor's nose. Impossibly green eyes glared at her from behind thick black glasses, and his hair was perfectly messy enough to partially cover a lightning-bolt scar over his right eye. "Alright, what gives?" he demanded of her.
"Jeez, HJ, sit down before you strain something," she said calmly. "Aren't you normally the quiet, soft-spoken one of the group?"
"Usually," HJ admitted grumpily, taking a seat next to the still-zoned-out Jules. "But come on, you made up an entire book filled with nothing but short tidbits of what you want to do to me. Even if none of it is published except the first chapter, I know the rest so far. Hell, do you have to introduce me to so many AU fics at once? I have a hard time remembering from minute to minute whether I'm a Phoenixan, or a dragon-boy, or even just a Ravenclaw. I mean, seriously! No, no, not my godfather, I...you know what I mean." He eyed the other two warily. "And then I show up here and you've already got two weirdos present."
"The more, the merrier!" she smirked, and Jim snorted in outrage. "Hey, at least I haven't had the Dursleys torture you or anything, like those other authors. Or had you turn to the Dark Side. ASIDE FROM the whole heir of Slytherin thing," she added quickly. "But you have to admit, everyone's thought of it anyway. I think I'm the first one who's done THAT, though."
"True, but...decapitating Hermione was not fun in the slightest."
"You didn't object at the time."
"I swear you must've drugged me or something. There is no way I would've agreed to that, were I in my right mind."
"Actually, since you're right-handed, you'd be in your left mind," she rattled off effortlessly.
HJ blinked, glared, and then sighed. "Mental note to self: never argue with a borderline Ravenclaw."
"And anyway, WOLFCLAW, I wouldn't think you'd turn down these nifty powers I give you in my latest," she teased. "You could REALLY use a healing factor. Madame Pomfrey won't always be there to hold your hand, ya know."
A knock came at the door. So unexpected this was, that Ael and her guests hardly knew how to react. After a shocked moment, she grabbed Jim and shoved him in the cloest, then threw a blanket and some plushies on top of HJ and Jules. "Make no noise and pretend that you don't exist," she hissed under her breath, and then opened the door.
The man on the other side was her exact height (five foot three - and if you DARE make any short jokes I'll hex you, and I mean it!!!!), except with an odd wolf-ear hairstyle and peculiarly overgrown sideburns. "Mind if I come in there, tyke?" he growled, leaning casually on the doorframe.
She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, hurry up." She closed the door behind him, then whipped the stuffed-animal-covered blanket off the odd duo, and dragged Jim out of the closet. "False alarm, guys. It's just James."
Jim gave her an odd look as he brushed cobwebs and dust bunnies off his uniform. "I thought *I* was James."
"No no, I mean James Howlett," she assured him.
HJ stared at the newcomer. "Err...you look so familiar. That's very, very frightening."
James blinked down at the scrawny teenager. "That's puttin' it mildly, bub. Hey Ael, you got any beer?"
She glared at him. "No hard stuff in MY house, Wolvie. And no, no cigars either. Here, have a Sobe, they've been sitting in my window all night. Should be plenty cold." She handed him a glass bottle, and he blinked at it in confusion. "So, James, what brings you here?"
He smirked. "What, I can't just show up and have a chat with my newest admirer?" He made a slashing motion with his left wrist, and with a glint of cold silver, the cap of the Sobe fell off, split neatly in half. He sniffed at it, made an odd face at the scent, but drank it anyway. "Actually, tyke, if you must know, I'm worried that you'll start invading my multiverse. See, I've heard about your reputation involvin' treatment of characters like myself, especially those with unusual abilities, if you get my drift." He eyed the other three suspiciously.
Ael laughed. "Don't worry, James. Everyone else in this room has odd abilities, whether they be canon or not. As a matter of fact, HJ over there has had some of yours." HJ looked embarassed by the sudden attention. "Er..."
Ael slapped her forehead. "Oh, I feel so stupid. I haven't made any introductions at all, have I?" She turned to the first two arrivals, then disregarded the second at the sight of his continuing trance. "James Kirk, you already know Julian Bashir," at which she lightly kicked the catatonic doctor, "but I don't believe you've met either of these. This is Harry James Potter-" ("Too many Jameses!" complained Kirk) "-and James Howlett, aka Logan, aka Wolverine." She paused. "Well, actually, Harry goes by many names...the Boy Who Lived, Yami no Ryuu, Lord Phoenixae, Heir of Gryffindor, Heir of Slytherin, Whitestripe, Bolt, Wolfclaw, and sometimes even Heracles Potter." She sniggered at Harry, who fumed at the last one.
"I told you, I'm just Harry!"
"Hey, would you prefer those zany authors who think your name is Heron? Or maybe Harold?" She made a face. "I've got an uncle named Harold. Unless you want to be a balding motorcycle fanatic who's impossible to put up with and has the most bizarrely-skewed logic, don't go along with that one."
She abruptly stood up. "I'm sneaking out to the kitchen for a late-night Pop Tart. Don't kill each other while I'm gone." And with that, she swept out of the room.
The four characters sat in the room, staring blankly at each other (well, except Jules; he was still in a trance). Finally, Jim broke the silence. "So...she mentioned powers that you two possess?"
James grunted in affirmative, and made a fist. Three nine-inch adamantium blades instantly snapped out between his knuckles. "Got these babies a ways back, along with a skeleton of this stuff. Indestructible. Not to mention a healing factor and enhanced senses."
Jim's eyes narrowed. "Exactly how enhanced?"
James took one sniff in Jim's direction. "Well, I can tell that your last girlfriend wasn't human...smells like maybe you were with her last two weeks ago, perhaps?"
Jim gaped at him. "Okay, that's fairly enhanced. Even Bashir here doesn't have quite THAT degree of sensitivity." Seeing that James had no other powers to speak of, he looked over at HJ. "What about you, kid?"
"Officially, in canon I'm just a wizard," HJ informed him. "Yes, as in magic. I'm still a student, though. In canon, that is. As far as Ael's concerned, I'm practically a demigod. She's given me shapeshifting ability beyond that of the Animagus, very odd linguistic skills, an odd curse that turns me into a malnourished half-dragon, incredible skill with a certain sword, and this guy's powers," he added, pointing to James. "Not all at once, mind you, but still." He shrugged. "What about you?"
"Eh, I've had a variety. Shapeshifting, wings, spirit transferral - I spent quite some time as a lizard, immortality, ability to speak beyond the grave, and even went so far as to make me a talking lion." He looked down at Jules. "This guy I'm not so sure about. He's genetically enhanced in canon, but Ael's done some freaky things with him. Not sure what they are, and we can't exactly ask him at present."
Ael came back in with a package of Pop Tarts. "Ah, you're mingling!" she said, pleased. "Good." She threw herself into her computer chair and spun it around a few times. "Now then," she said, rubbing her hands together with a smile on her face, "what exactly do you wish of me?"
"Bashir and I want you to finish writing," Jim declared.
"I want you to STOP writing about me," HJ added. "Or at least slow down on the AUs."
"And I just want written proof that you won't be after me next," James drawled.
"Hmm." Ael assumed a thinking pose, and tapped her chin in thought. She pulled out a scrap of parchment and a quill, and scribbled a quick note. "Here, you've got my written word," she said, folding it into a paper airplane and flying it over to James. He snatched it out of the air, and instantly disappeared. "Next customer!"
She circled HJ for a minute, and the boy wizard looked distinctly nervous by her actions. "Hmm...how about this? I'll send you to another fandom. Give you a nice break from all my insanity."
HJ's face expressed his relief. "That'd be great, thanks!"
"Don't mention it." She tossed him a Lego starship, and he disappeared as well.
Ael turned to Jim with a smirk on her face. "You might want to go back home; I'm not making any promises. Besides, poor HJ will probably crash your ship while you're gone. Ta!"
End!