((I own no one, except the Toaster))
((Early Morning, Squee wakes to a trashed home, no thanks to his father, and his fat mother sleeping on the sofa, snoring so intolerably loud that Squee has to cover his ears, and Shmee's, as he walks past.))
((He slowly creeps to the kitchen, and laying a top the counter sits a few pieces of bread.))
((He wants to make toast this morning.))
((He pulls a chair up the counter and sets Shmee right beside him.))
((Shmee smarts off))
Squee: No Shmee, this toast idea is good. You'll see.
((He pulls the toaster closer to the edge to place the toast into the slots, just as he dangles the bread abouve the toaster, who other should walk in about this time, then Nny, the friendly neighbor psychopath))
Squee: Johnny, SQUEE! ((Johnny places his cold hand over Squee's mouth))
Johnny: I used the tunnel I dug under the your house.
((release Squee))
Johnny: So what are you making this disgusting morning?
Squee: ((stuttering))...Toast
Johnny: TOAST? WHY TOAST? That foul disgusting pices of crispy grains that get all over the floor, and your shirt! Here, ((evil grin)) Let me show you how to make tooaasssttttt...((darts off quickly))
((Squee Stands still, while scared of what evil plan Johnny has this morning. Johnny returns with a bag, a bag that smells like road kill, well this is Johnny we are talking about, so why wouldn't it be road kill))
Johnny: Now, let me see the bread. ((takes bread away from Squee)) Hmmm, NO MOLD? NO DISCOLOURING? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD TODAY? Oh, well we shall improvise. ((digs into his bag of body parts, body parts so bloody and old that you no one could really tell if they were human or not, he pulls out a rabbit ear, and slabs it on the limp bread laying on the table))
Squee: SQUEE! Uh.
Johhny: ((reaches back into his bag and a jerks a few legs of arms)) Let's cram these into the toaster. ((begins to cram random items into the toaster)) IT WILL GIVE IT EXTRA FLAVOR! FIT IN THERE YOU STUPID PIECE OF OOZING FILTH!
Squee: Nny, no..Nny! NNY! SQUEE! AHHHHH!
((Johhny Finshes his quick moment of craming bloody body parts into the toaster and pushes down the lever. He waits paitently as Squee picks up Shmee and stand behind Nny.))
Johnny: Any second now...((begins to get impaitent)) WHY THE FUCK IS THIS TAKING SO LONG? ((and with a jealous rage begins to beat the toaster with the nearest knife within his reach. He slams the knife into the toaster repeatadly until it short circuts and burns out, Nny stands dumfounded and turns to Squee))
Johnny: Well, there you have it...((shows Squee the burnt mess of the toaster and body parts scorched to a chrispy brown))
((Without a moments hesitation Squee takes off running out of the kitchen back to his room))
((Johnny stands staring at the destroyed appliance))
Johnny: Hmm. ((ponders)) You know, I think we should have made chrilled cheese.
The End