Blair has always been a good girl. She is not the type of girl to be disobedient, and she is certainly not the type of girl to leave in the middle of her mother's wedding, no matter how much she disapproves. But there is something in Dorota's voice that suggests urgency.
As she climbs the stairs to her room she can feel her mother's eyes on her back. But she does not turn around. Her mind is racing. She can't possibly think of what he could want with her now, after humiliating her just hours earlier. She had been honest with him, for the first time ever, and he had brushed her off. He had just left her there on the sidewalk, wondering what she had been thinking.
She does not know what she was thinking, telling Chuck Bass she loved him. She had hoped – it was silly, really, but she had hoped that he would somehow feel the same and everything would work itself out. She knows that she had been fooling herself.
And she also knows that she is the first person to say those words to him. Who else is there? His father spent like two minutes with him his whole life. He had no mother. She is his first. Blair likes being first. She thinks that should count for something.
She makes up her mind to be cool and collected when she tells him politely to leave, so he can't see how much he has hurt her.
When she enters her room she asks him what he thinks he is doing here, why he thinks he can just show up like this after the way he has treated her. She regrets it immediately after she sees his face.
He looks so sad. She has never seen anyone look so sad. She is momentarily surprised because she is unaware that Chuck Bass has the emotional capacity to be so sad. He doesn't say anything, just looks down at his feet with all that pain on his face, and she doesn't know what to do or say to help him but she knows that she has to do something because no one should ever be as alone as Chuck Bass is at this moment.
So she does the only thing she can think of; she sits next to him and wraps her arms around him awkwardly and says nothing.
At first he is stiff and still in her arms, but she feels him begin to relax and his head comes back to rest on her shoulder.
She feels helpless because it doesn't really seem like she is doing any good but then she feels his breath hitch in his throat and she can't see his face but she knows he is crying, and she is amazed because Chuck Bass is really crying actual tears and slightly flattered because he probably hasn't let anyone else see him like this.
His arm comes up to grasp hers, and her heart is just breaking for him and she knows she will do anything for this boy.
And she decides to just sit there holding him and let him make the next move, because she really doesn't know what to do anyway. He turns to face her and his eyes are red and he still looks sad, but at least she knows he can't possibly feel so lonely anymore.
She wants to cry but she can't because she has to be strong for him and because she is not a pretty crier, so she keeps her composure and clasps his hand in hers, leading him down among the many pillows on her bed where they lay silently facing each other.
He is staring at her and she knows he must feel ashamed to let her see him so vulnerable, because he is Chuck Bass, so she places a soft kiss on his lips and tells him that it's okay and strokes his hair back away from his eyes and lets him know, once again, that she is there for him.
He is exhausted, she can tell he probably hasn't slept well since it happened and she thinks that maybe if he sleeps he will feel better, so she tells him this and strokes his hair some more until his breathing gets slow and quiet and his eyes slide shut.
She looks at his sleeping face and thinks that he is beautiful and she really does love him, but then he rolls over and she can't see him anymore.
She knows, as she closes her eyes that he will not be there when she wakes up; just as he knows as he writes the note that she will come looking for him and he will allow himself to be found.