On a cold river in the Freljord,
Sat King Tryndamere who felt quite bored,
And this feeling was strange,
So he wished for some change,
And a figure arose from the fjord.
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It said, "Brother, I know how you feel,
It's like casting a line with no reel,
You're a King, so am I,
I'm a trustworthy guy,
So how 'bout it? Shall we make a deal?"
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Trynd yelled, "I won't be fooled by your schemes,
You make gourmets and feasts out of dreams,
I am mad, yet I'm sane,
I have nothing to gain,
From a catfish whose coat shows its seams."
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Tahm Kench frowned and said, "Son, you've beat me!
You saw through my ruse so completely,
As a gesture of will,
That is sorry not ill,
I'll make a deal that's consequence free."
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The Frost King thought of little but war,
Or hunting and roast mutton galore,
So he chose his best wish,
And he spoke to the fish,
He said, "Tahm Kench. Ever had dinosaur?"
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It's as if he'd been hooked with a gaff,
Tahm Kench smiled and let out a laugh,
"Boy, your hunger's undying,
Hop inside, we'll get flying,
If time's a river, I'll be the raft."
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And the hungry Kings went to the past,
Tryranosaurs breaking their fast,
With a goal just to eat,
Scrumptious dinosaur meat,
Tryndamere and Tahm Kench had a blast.
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But their hunger couldn't be sated,
As Dinosaur life soon abated,
Extinction's the story,
In guts with no glory,
Let's just say, the Kings weren't elated.
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Stomach's full, the two went on their way,
To the present to digest their buffet,
So now through with his task,
Tahm Kench just had to ask,
"How 'bout dodos for lunch this Friday?"