Just started reading The Book Thief, and I'm in love with his writing style. Tried my best to mimic it in this fic.
P.S. Unfortunately, I haven't read the manga, I've only heard little snippets of what happens, so please excuse me if I'm completely off canon with this.
I'll say this once and only once: he didn't deserve to die the way he did.
Never let it be said that I don't pity humanity. Never let it be known that I detest bloodshed. I have carried more souls in my arms than I care to count; I know of the destruction I leave in my wake.
None know the cold intimacy of Death better than I. I have reaped countless lives and carried more souls in my arms than one can ever count. I've seen the last whispers of life fade from my burden's eyes, and I've seen the hearts of their loved ones break in two (the fragile innocence in children's eyes fade to emptiness, the weeping of women, and men made of stone—breaking).
I see it every day. Inside and outside the Walls. Men, titans…in the end, both belong to Death.
I wait at your threshold, I'm the thing lurking by your shoulder, I am the shadow standing over you in your final moments. I am but one in the hosts of shinigami.
Most faces I see only once and never again. With humanity on the brink of extinction, my brethren and I cross the skies day by day, night by night, harboring the fallen souls of men and women. Once is enough for me. One glimpse can last me an eternity.
And yet, I saw the titan-shifter five times.
Once, he was the murderer. Once, I took something precious from him. Once, he cheated me. Once, death followed him. And once, he came to me.
*A BRIEF DESCRIPTION OF THE FIRST INCIDENT*
It was night.
There was no moon.
Only an Asian child, human traffickers, a boy with fire in his eyes—
and the beginning of an unshakable bond.
When it comes down to it, their relationship was formed over the case of murder. Three murders, if you want to be specific.
Some might say that it was a terrible way to meet. That it left each of them scarred from the very beginning. And if you're curious: yes, it did leave them haunted. But no: it was not a terrible way to meet. In fact, it was possibly the best start to a friendship I'd ever seen.
Because even if you can get along with someone, it's easy to forget about them completely. But when you team up to kill three men? It's almost impossible to just walk away. Even more so when you've saved each other's lives.
Granted, they cut it a little close. What was a (mostly) clean rescue almost resulted in an extra death, but a bruised throat and a cut lip was all they walked away with. He was breathing, if a little uneven. And the girl was safe and sound.
*AN EXTRA DETAIL*
I hadn't known it at the time, but later, the girl would steal many souls away from me and the boy would mock me for years to come. Always surrounded by death, but dancing just out of my grip. I can't say I mind.
By the time the Military Police arrived, the girl's tears were dried and the boy's breathing was back to normal. And, surprisingly enough, they found that their services were completely and utterly unneeded.
*WHAT THEY FOUND IN THE SHACK*
Two nine year olds with red-stained hands
A knife
Three bodies
One very large pool of blood
I did my job quickly. I went in, flung two souls over each of my shoulders and held the third beneath my arm. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just another day. Just a few more deaths in hundreds. I was tired, my back ached, and all I wanted was to move on.
Here's where I suppose I made my mistake: I looked back. Just in time to see the boy remove his scarf from his own neck and wrap it around the girl's.
Goosebumps rose up on the boy's skin, but he didn't shiver. I think it's safe to say that that's exactly when their bond was secured for sure. When Fate agreed that, even when all was said and done and the Titans controlled the earth, it would still be Eren Jaeger and Mikasa Ackerman against the world.
The second time I saw him, he was ten. Just young enough to be hopefully naïve but old enough to be remarkably stubborn.
He was still trying to help his mother, even as she pleaded with him to run.
*THE LAST CONVERSATION BETWEEN A MOTHER AND HER SON*
"The Titans have gotten inside, haven't they? Eren! Take Mikasa and get out of here!"
"I want to! So hurry up and get out of here!"
"The debris has crushed my legs…. Even if I could get out, I wouldn't be able to run. You know what that means."
"I'll carry you then!"
"Why don't you ever listen to your mother? You can at least do this one last thing!"
In the end it takes a cowardly soldier from the Garrison division to tear Eren and Mikasa away. Flinging one over his shoulder and grabbing the other by the hand, the soldier ran.
He had chance to save her then. To do what he was trained to do, but instead he ran. He took one look at the Titan and froze before taking the easy way out and saving the children. Only the children.
I don't recall him ever looking back.
The soldier couldn't have known it at the time. But his fate was sealed then. Years later, he would face the Smiling Titan again, and this time, there would be no easy way out.
I must admit, I broke a rule that day. I took his mother's soul too early, before she could feel the pain of being torn in half. It was the least I could do for her. And the boy for that matter. After all, he was still watching when the Titan took his first bite.
*A NOTEWORTHY OBSERVATION*
That was the first time I ever took a soul from him.
It wasn't the last.
The third time we crossed paths, he was a different boy. Still fiery, still stubborn, still determined, and at the same time, nothing like he used to be.
*EREN JAEGER, AGE 15*
Short
Impulsive
One too many blows to the head
With a voice just starting to deepen
And a small, undetected crush—
You can't forget the crush
The situation, on the other hand, was hauntingly familiar. I was there, and so were my brothers. We were waiting for the bloodshed to begin.
And begin it did.
The humans died quicker than I think the other shinigami anticipated. They got disorganized, bringing along as many of the dead as we could on each trip, trying to finish as soon as possible, often hindering each other. Except for me.
I followed Eren Jaeger. His time was coming, I could tell. So I stayed nearby, ready to catch his soul the minute he died.
*SOME CLARIFICATION*
Despite what you might think, I did not have a death wish for the boy.
I merely wanted to give him to his mother.
He chose a noble way to go. Saving a friend from a Titan's mouth and giving his own life in the process—there were worse ways to go. Most of his squad died without a purpose, alone, or begging for mercy from a monster.
If he had died that is.
It's not an easy feat to cheat me. I've been around far too long and seen far too much to be easily fooled. And yet, I was beaten that day, tricked—and made a laughingstock for many years to come.
That was when I realized exactly what Eren Jaeger was, and so did he.
A titan-shifter.
(If you're curious, Mikasa took it better than I thought she would.)
*WHAT OUR FOURTH MEETING ENTAILED*
Humans clad in green
A formation destined for failure
A plan doomed from the beginning
A female Titan
By the time all was and done, the grass was painted red and littered with broken bodies. Countless sacrifices had been made, betrayal was in the air, and it all funneled down to Eren Jaegar. The monster—and the last hope for humanity.
He was fifteen at the time.
It's a strange thing to give your life for a boy. An even stranger thing to die for a boy that wasn't completely human, but that was the choice that was made. A success? In a way, yes. The titan-shifter was in one piece. A good portion of the Recon Corps, however, were dead or missing.
Flat on his back, he stared at the sky, numb. Images replayed in his head over and over. Eld bit in half, Petra crushed, Oluo killed, the female titan escaping, Eld bit in half, Petra… For the first time in a long while, he felt hopeless.
He was tired, he was useless, and the Recon Corps had died for no reason whatsoever. Nothing was gained, yet everything was gone. Lying helplessly in that wagon, the titan-shifter's eyes misted over. Beside him, Mikasa buried her face into her scarf and didn't say a word.
A girl with auburn hair lying limp in my arms and a gray haired man on my back, I left. They're was too much red and too much grief. I couldn't stand it any longer. They won't tell you this. Not in any books or folktales, but that day, even my brethren pitied the humans.
*A CONSOLATING FACT*
Eren Jaeger was avenged.
*A LESS CONSOLATING FACT*
It didn't even matter.
Some called it an execution. Most, an accident. The ones that were there called it what it was. Murder. Plain, old fashioned murder.
There are several details I need to point out for you to grasp just how low his death was. One, he and Hanji were doing an experiment. Two, the expedition to recapture Wall Maria was taking place the next day. Three, he died for absolutely no reason other than humanity's fear of change.
Earlier, I said I pitied humanity. That is true. But sometimes, sometimes I despise it. Too wary of what's new, and yet unable to help themselves—that's the problem with people. They're too afraid to come out of their precious safety net of what's familiar and ask, what if.
I will tell you something important, mortal, and something I believe.
*A BRIEF DEFENSE*
Before you think that shinigami can't believe, think again, and know this: we have faith and hope, evidently more than humans do.
The titan-shifter was one of their best chances of survival, and the Military Police killed him like he was any other Titan. The few soldiers watching the experiment stopped them before they could escape, but the deed was already done. An injured Hanji, a ruined experiment, and a dead Titan.
Armin was the first one to his side. "Eren!" he tried, banging on the Titan's neck as if to wake him, as if it could help. "Eren—"
*THE COMMOTION THAT ENSUED*
"Is he—"
"Those bastards!"
"We have to get him out of there."
"Someone get a medic!"
"If he's hurt, I swear to God, I'll kill them myself!"
"Eren?"
In the end, Levi was the one to cut him out. It was messy and slow, and by the time they were finished, the boy's breathing was almost nonexistent and his shirt was coated in blood, two deep gashes running across his back. Connie still hadn't arrived with the medic.
Mikasa held him close, and he stared up at her, wanting her to be the last thing to see. If her tears dripping onto his face bothered him, he didn't show it.
*EREN JAEGER'S FINAL MOMENTS*
There were tears
A scarf pressed to his wound
Shaky hands
A rushed goodbye
A kiss
And nothing more
I carried him away then. Away from the destruction and the hopelessness and the cowards. He was the only soul I delivered that day. That's where this story ends I'm afraid. With Death, as all stories should—and one final statement.
*ONE PAINFUL TRUTH*
"Only the victors survive. The world is merciless like that."
Haven't written in forever, so sorry if it's not really up to par. Feedback is still appreciated though.