Disclaimer:

Disclaimer: Both Transformers and My Little Pony are the properties of Hasbro. This is a non-profit work intended for entertainment and speculative purpose only.

Darkryt Orbinautz presents...

Anthrophilla!

Across the solar systems, Autobot and Decepticon alike were boarding their dropships and escape pods and piloting a course for their home, Cybertron. They heard the summons from the Core, and were eager to head home, war or not. Some rejected the notion, either being so violent they didn't want to return to a home of peace or just so used to a life of war they didn't know how to function anymore outside of it.

One particular Autobot was traveling back and forth between Cybertron, Earth, and Equestria. It made sense. His profession demanded meeting the Autobots individually and assessing them. His frame was lanky, white and orange, and virtually defenseless. Yes, this Autobot was none other than the Autobot psychiatrist Rang!

...No, no, that's not his name, his name was...what was it? Ding? Clang? Rivet? Big huge browplates? Has a clipboard, this...this... well, his name must not be that important if even the narration can't think of it.

Setting the disregard for the fourth wall aside, Wrangle was currently escorting one Twilight Sparkle to his old office for therapy. Twilight had objected, of course, claiming she was perfectly sane and not in any traumatized.

Twilight, as she walked beside Clink, wondering just what the Autobot had said to Optimus that convinced him to allow it. Sure, he was a therapist, but was Optimus that vulnerable to psychology? She had to make note of that. The idea of Optimus being suspecitable to psychobabble was interesting to her, indeed.

But in reality...

Earlier...

"Look." Rung said, gesturing at the remnants of Damocles with, fittingly, the shrapnel of another of Twilight's doomsday devices. "She's clearly ready to exterminate the species at the smallest provocation, sir." Rung clasped his arms pleadingly. "Please, sir, just give me a chance."

Optimus looked back and forth between Rung and Damocles, hand cupped on his chin.

"Sir?" Rung questioned Optimus' silence.

"She likes books." Optimus answered mysteriously before turning around and walking away.

"Oh, yes! Thank you sir!"

"One more thing, Rung..."

"Yes?"

"May Celestia's own Matrix have mercy on you and your quest."

"Gee..." Rung noted. "How very...inspiring of you, my liege."

Twilight stopped to look at the grid of Changeling-filled screens above powering Cybertron now. A fitting faith for them, as far as she was concerned. Being undead, Twilight didn't need to breath. But that didn't keep her from noticing there was oxygen. Whether or not this was always a feature of Cybertron that disappeared with its shutdown, or a side-effect of using Changelings, she didn't know.

"Ah, here we are." Rung said to her once they arrived at a large tower with an elevator-like door. "Right this way, Miss Sparkle."

Twilight leered at the door, eyed Rung suspiciously, and stepped into the door. Once inside, she found that the building's interior smelled like quack doctors. Although, she wasn't sure how she knew what quack doctors smelled like.

"In there, please." Wrangle pointed at a particular room. Twilight entered it to find it was padded like for crazy ponies. She glared at Wrung, who had a glint in his optics.

"What are you having me do exactly?" Twilight asked as she walked into the room.

Rivet pulled out a human rag doll of a little blonde girl in overalls.

"This doll is specified to help cure you of your hatred of humans!" Wrangle exclaimed.

Twilight raised an eyebrow. "Really? Do you know what I've been through with them?"

"Yes." Rang answered. "And what you've been through with them is valid cause to develop an intense distrust towards them."

"I do have an intense distrust towards them!"

"You also have an excruciating contempt for them to the point you have no qualm about unleashing doomsday machines or-or-or ancient demons on them, which far exceeds the extent of how they've wronged you!"

Twilight's head tilted, not understanding what Rangle just said.

Roid shook his head. "Never mind. Just stay in here and hug this doll over and over for twenty minutes, and you should be cured!" He dropped the doll into Twilight's hooves.

Twilight hugged it.

"I love you!" A pre-recorded voice on the doll squeaked at her. Twilight glared at Ding, not amused by his choice of tools. Rang just smiled at her and gave the thumbs-up before sneaking out of the room and locking her in, leaving Twilight with a stuffed doll that she would have twenty minutes to hug and listen to her sweet, sweet words.

Twenty minutes later...

Roll or whatever his name was came back into the room. "Your twenty minutes are up, Twilight Sparkle! How are you feeling?"

Twilight sat on her haunches, bright-eyed and looking innocent. (Fake innocent, but Wrung didn't pick up on it.)

"Wonderful! That doll was excellent!"

"Glad to hear it!" Cling applauded and jumped up and down in applause. Then he noticed a discrepancy in the room. "...Where is the doll?"

"I liked her so much, I used a come-to-life spell on her!" Twilight told him. She started coughing. "Kaff...cough..."

"Are you all right, Twilight?"

"Yeah!" Twilight assured him. "Just got...(cough)...something in my throat. (Cough...kaff...kauf! HAAACK!)"

"Are you sure you don't need a lozenge?...Or perhaps the Heimlich maneuver?" Rung offered politely.

"(HAAACK!)"

Twilight coughed out the severed head of the doll onto the floor, where it's bright smiling face contrasted against the saliva and teeth marks in it.
Rung stared down at it, not sure what to think with a sad pout on his face. He looked at Twilight.

Twilight made a very forced, innocent smile. Her teeth having turned to fangs of Dark Energon didn't help the effect much.

Roid scratched the back of his head. "Well...this is going to be harder than I thought."

Author's Notes for "Anthrophilla"

Just a quick idea I had whilst reading Rung's TF Wiki page.

One review for "The Reign of Starscream" said that it was Twilight's fault all the humans around end up betraying her. Not my intended portrayal of things. It's really more Starscream's fault...and maybe Silas', to a lesser extent.

This has been sitting around in my document manager for awhile. I have some stories they are just one chapter in that I'd like to finish, but for some reason it's just not happening. What's one more on the workload, eh? I figured I might as well publish this one, as it's not doing anyone any good just sitting around in here...So, this will be marked as "Complete" until I am ready to continue it.

Plus, I want an opening to write Fanfiction using the stuff from James Roberts and John Barber's awesome stories.

And yes, when this is continued -which could take awhile, for various reasons which are part of my personal life-

...I will eventually get Lyra involved.

Somehow.

I'm also going to experiment here: This isn't something I usually do, but hopefully someone saying the right thing will trigger a creative resurgence in my mind:

I will be accepting suggestions!

Edit: April, 2013, 12th; Okay. I was really confused by someone suggesting that I write a story featuring Spike and Grimlock. Then I realized that I hadn't clarified.

I meant suggestions for this story, and what kind of hijinks Rung and Twilight could get into.