Luggage
Summary: Shaun is cheap. Really, really cheap.
A/N: Ok uhm… LARF, I KINDA SAW THIS ON TV. Uh if anything seems weird, I've never flown, so I don't know what airports are like. Anywho, enjoy. AU, Oneshot.
Desmond stood, annoyed, waiting for Shaun to gather up all his luggage. Their trip away from the normal routine at the Animus Company was this long-awaited trip to Rome, in which Shaun blushed over all the historic things while Desmond merely took enjoyment from Shaun's flustered wonder of every freaking pebble on the road. But they were currently in the airport, waiting for Shaun's luggage.
Desmond, being a sparse traveler, had one, small bag filled with mostly socks and underwear. Shaun, being an intensely detailed man and a perfectionist, had five bags of luggage, most of them rather large. They were stuffed with every piece of clothing that Shaun owned, along with assorted bathroom items, shoes, bottles of dubious liquids, and seemingly random pieces of technology and a lot of batteries.
As one could imagine, this amount of luggage kept the security personnel busy for longer than Desmond could handle. He began to fidget, while Shaun stood patiently, waiting for his beloved material items. Ironically, it seemed their roles were reversed. Desmond was normally the calm one, laid back and completely uncaring, while Shaun was normally tense, cautious and meticulous.
"Shaun, this is ridiculous!" Desmond finally exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. Shaun merely glanced over his shoulder, about to say something witty, perhaps not as snarky as normal, but still sarcastic when the woman checking his baggage interrupted him.
"Sir, it appears your luggage is over the weight limit." Shaun stared at her as if it was impossible. Desmond muttered an, "Oh gee, what a surprise…" under his breath.
"Sir, I'm afraid you're going to have to take some luggage home or pay for the extra" The woman looked just as impatient as Desmond. He mused that it was probably the largest amount of luggage she would check in her life. Shaun coughed, obviously offended.
"How much will the extra cost?" He demanded, businesslike, with a sharp tone that matched his now-prickly posture. She sighed. "Well let's see, you're about 50 lbs. over the weight limit, so that will be about $100." The gasp of horror that issued from Shaun's mouth made it sound like he was being stripped of all his possessions and then beaten, just to make a point.
Desmond rolled his eyes. "Shaun I'll pay if you don't want to, you cheap bastard. Let's just not prolong this any further, for god's sake" Shaun still looked horrified. He quickly seized the closest bag, opening it and taking about five pairs of shoes out, three pairs of pants, some other miscellaneous items, a sweatshirt, a sweater, four button-down shirts and two t-shirts. Then he hurriedly shut the bag and asked her if that was 50 lbs. worth. She replied with, "No, you'll need more to go under the weight limit" He rifled through another bag and pulled out even more items, and then shoved those into Desmond's arms, who took them with an alarmed cry of, "Shaun, what the fu-" "Just shut up and carry them for a minute!" Classic Shaun.
When Desmond's arms were full and Shaun's arms were much more than full, the woman finally called the 50 lb. mark. He scowled at her and thanked her, but she stared at them wide-eyed and asked, "But what are you going to do with all those clothes?" Shaun smirked and gave her a vague, sarcastic answer as he stepped off to the side. Desmond followed him, quizzical. "Shaun, really, what are you - " The British man silence him with a look and began to put the clothes on. Pants, shirts, and sweaters went on their respective body parts and shoes got tied together and slung around Shaun's neck. Miscellaneous items went in his pockets and by the time he was finished, Shaun looked very, very pudgy and more than a little stiff. His arms and legs could move, but with obvious difficulty.
Desmond stared at the older man. Then he burst out laughing. Shaun glared at him and stooped to pick up one of his bags. The amount of fabric he had bunched around his limbs was too much, and he teetered, his balance quickly slipping. When he finally fell, Desmond caught Shaun's elbows in his warm hands and said, softly but still mockingly, "Ok fatty, let's get your luggage and get on that plane" Shaun's blush was barely contained, as was his rage.
"F-fatty? Desmond Miles! I should - " He tried to swat at Desmond's chest, but his elbows couldn't bend that far and he just ended up looking incredibly cute and endearing instead of threatening. They successfully got through the rest of the processing route and were finally sitting on the plane, Shaun looking uncomfortable in his numerous layers, while Desmond was lounging in his seat, slouching with one arm slung around Shaun's now-puffier shoulders.
Shaun sighed, and admitted his fault. "I'm just too damn cheap." Desmond chuckled, and Shaun felt the vibration run through Desmond's arm onto his back.
"I would have paid it, if you just weren't so stubborn. By the way, I think this chubbier look is kinda cute. Maybe when we get there you could invest in a large amount of pasta and sweets?" Shaun reached over and slapped him. Desmond laughed again, a short and warm sound. Then Shaun reached over again and forced Desmond to look at him, then struggled a little bit to sit straight with all the puffy layers and then kissed Desmond on his scarred and unbearably soft lips.
A little girl behind them said, "Ewwww! Kissy-face!" from behind them and Shaun broke off, blushing intensely. The girl's mother laughed, as did Desmond, and Shaun faced forward for an uncomfortable flight ahead. Although, it might not be so uncomfortable later, when they were booked in a hotel and Desmond had the opportunity to take all of those layers off of him, in the privacy of their hotel room, of course.
Hurr, hoped you enjoyed.