Author Notes:

Hi there! :) Remember I promised you a surprise? Well, this is it! :D This chapter is dedicated to my friend and beta EminaKotek-nightmare for always encouraging me. :) Enjoy the reading, my dear!

Since the story will probably focus more on Hana & the YuYu Gang's relationship in general, as well as Hiei and Hana's in particular, I decided that this parallel collection of one-shots may help in understanding the background or Real Life. It won't have an actual plot and most of the chapters will be discontinued, but the story itself will tie them up.

This first shot has in its center my other OC, Rina. I feel that I'm neglecting her a little and she's the main reason everything started! It also concentrates more on her and Shizuru but I let you discover the substrate. ;) I hope you'll enjoy it! It has a little hint of her and Kurama too…well, little is an understatement. :))

I used different text formatting to help understand the frames, since this chapter is kind of an experiment of mine. I tried writing it like a frame story. It was originally written three years ago after a literature class in High School and styled only recently.

That being said… I hope Kurama and Rina fans will enjoy this the most. :-)

Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho (c) Yoshihiro Togashi

Shots of Real Life

Rina's Book: My Beginning

90% of the events set before the events in Real Life

Two years.

That much time passed since my life changed for good. I never before imagined myself like this, living like this, thinking like this, lying like this.

I look the people around me; I look them in the eyes as they pass by me without a second glance and ask myself:

How is it? How does it feel?

To not think if you're going to make it through the day one more time or if everyone will be alright or still… alive!

Two years ago I met Shizuru in one of what I think it was one of her worst days. She was musing over her dead love.

I knew this woman for a long time now and I was aware that, in that particular day, she'll be at her parents' grave, like every other year. She'll always be there every year since she was a child but… for some other reason, for a few years now, she'd go there in another day…

Her parents died in winter, but that 'other day' was a beautiful summer day and she was there, just like last year and the year before, and the year before that…

That day she was there too and she was lightening a cigar… she never did that in the winter visits. I didn't know at that moment what it meant. I just knew she wasn't there because of her parents… call it a feeling.

"…that lighter again." I noticed that Shizuru was using that black lighter she was always carrying with her ever since she disappeared one day for that trip…

She never told me why… until then.

"Hey," I approached her and called out to her casually. Her expression didn't change one bit. Wasn't she surprised to see me here? Or was she expecting me?...

"You'll anger your mom if you smoke in front of her grave," I pursued. Shizuru didn't say anything but took a deep smoke and released it after she closed her eyes to enjoy the moment.

"I don't care," she finally said with her bored tone, "I didn't come here to see them in the first place."… but there was something in there. Nervousness? Frustration?... eagerness?

"Then why did you come? It's not even their day." I kept asking questions, not knowing her turmoil… I had to! Shizuru would never open up to me without a little push. Oh, how I didn't know the immensity of that incentive…

She was silent, casually smoking and looking distantly at their gravestones.

"You're doing this every year ever since you came back from that trip years ago."

I was pushing it now. I knew… I was beginning to cross the line. One more and I will stop. One more and I will walk away. One more and I will leave her alone forever, never again bothering her with it… after this one more, I'll stay in the shadow, just like I always did. Only so she could see the sun.

Silence.

"You never told me what happened then. Three years have passed and I never asked you once…"

This was it… the last push.

I remember even now her dull eyes and pale skin.

Shizuru always wore an expressionless face but that day… she was like a ghost.

Like a shell without a soul.

"…because you'll just shut yourself up without a sound."

She didn't say anything. For a moment, I thought she'll be forever petrified, like time stopped flowing for her… it was painful to watch her like that, so I cowardly looked away. There was nothing I could do anyway. She didn't let me in, I wasn't strong enough to reach her. I could only wait… and wait I did.

"You wanna know," Shizuru finally spoke, "obviously." Her words felt like a sign of life, like there was still a chance, like time started to flow again. Shizuru never sounded so close and so distant than in that very moment.

My eyes drifted to hers expecting.

I never knew…

I never knew how much I didn't know and how much I'll wish I'd never known.

Until then…

I took my chance. "It's hard to see you like this…" I spoke my mind. She always appreciated when I was straight forwarded. She said it was my personal trait, kind of like my trademark. Haha! good old days… good old sunny days when her smile was almost genuine. When there were no secrets…

Shizuru raised her hand to take a closer look at that damned lighter. The black elegant, masculine lighter which hold craved the SN initials…

"Ya see this?" she said still not taking her eyes off of it. "He gave it to me."

"He?"

"Sakyo."

I blinked once. I couldn't believe my ears. Shizuru was coming to me. I was anxious and nervous and happy at the same time. She was coming back! My friend was coming back to me!

"I know I may not… actually I'm sure I am not in my right mind now for telling you this but… would you believe me if I tell you he was the mad rich human owner of a team of former humans that fought with my friends' team in a black martial arts tournament hosted by the richest men of the black market during the time I disappeared?" a short pause. "You think you're ready to take this in? There is a lot of 'black' in the sentences that will come…"

I thought Shizuru was my beginning.

How wrong I was… she wasn't my beginning, she was only the prologue. The beginning of my story

was someone else…

….

I still remember that day…

it didn't pass that much after all. But it wasn't the length of time passing… that didn't let me forget…

My beginning.

"Rina-chan!"

I heard Yukina calling out my name and I ran towards her. I opened the shoji door that led into the kitchen and I almost ran into her. That moment Keiko caught me by the arm and dragged me in.

"Are you nuts?!" she yelled at me, "You could've been killed!"

"But I have to find Shizuru!" I yelled back at her. "She's out there and I must find her!"

"And what's your plan, Rina-chan? Ran right through the temple that's literally a war-zone?" Keiko snapped angered but I knew she was only worried for my safety. I was being stupid, reckless, I knew it! But there was no helping it…

It's been a week since we were at the temple because major threats wore pointed towards Yusuke. For our safety me, Keiko and Shizuru had to come here so Yusuke could keep an eye on us. Also, Kuwabara was looking after Yusuke's mom together with a monk from his kingdom and Kurama offered his help too even if he was staying into town, most of the time. He also had a family to look after. I haven't seen him after the last meeting two days ago.

All of a sudden, five minutes ago, after a quiet week, Kuwabara, who came to change places in watching over us with Yusuke, yelled at us to hide because he felt many youkais coming the temple's way. He looked so alarmed that we didn't think too much into it, just acted. Keiko and Yukina ran out of the main room as instructed and I quickly followed them when… I remembered Shizuru was still outside with Genkai! I should've known that since she was with Genkai, she was more than safe. I should've known that Genkai would have definitely sensed the demons coming and would've gone to safety. However, at that moment I didn't realize it. I was too concerned with her that I ran out after Kuwabara when he went to face up the attackers.

I didn't manage to see much outside because I felt Yukina grabbing my arm.

"Don't! Let's go to safety! Leave Shizuru-san to Kazuma-san!" she said guessing my intentions.

"Besides, she survived Ankoku Bujutsukai, she won't die from something like this and you know it!" Keyko added from the doorway.

Of course, I knew these things, but she was still out there! She could've been taken by surprise and hurt and I just couldn't stand that! So I did the most irresponsible thing ever: I ran away from them again, not minding their yells.

I was out in the open in less than a second. There was no one in the front yard so I just followed my gut and turned left, going towards the back of the temple.

What I wasn't aware of was, when I passed the temple's wall and tried to cross the field, something terrible was about to happen that could've ended my life before I even realized it. Only after everything ended I realized that I was almost caught between Kuwabara's attack and that of another demon.

Everything happened too fast for me to register it exactly. In a split of second I saw the red light coming from the youkai's attack, then another bright one that was Kuwabara's spirit sword, a familiar voice calling out my name and then I felt myself being dragged forward, the air being caught out of my lungs. Then nauseous worked its way up my throat and pain in my middle section as I hit the ground biting my tong when my face too met the ground.

I heard the battle cries of the demon and the clash of the two's energies in the next second.

I also didn't realize this until I felt myself being dragged again and my painful cries turned into fearful yelps, my body unable to move on my commands.

But, it all ended as fast as it started and before I took note that I was raised up in a sitting position, I felt strong arms forcing me up and aware.

"Rina-chan, are you alright? Rina!"

I knew whose voice belonged to before I saw him. I snapped my eyes open before I realized that they were closed and the nauseous came rushing back. I wanted to answer him that I was fine, I wanted to ask him what just happened, I wanted to see his face clearly, not clouded by the fatigue, but my head hurt; my mouth was filled with blood, my vision was blurred and I felt like I would collapse again if it wasn't for his strong grip on me.

"Rina-chan, can you hear me?"

"Ku.." was all I could mutter before blood ran out of my mouth from the bitten tong and I covered it with my hand.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't save you another way. You were too far, I had to drag you out of the harm's way using my whip. I'm so sorry!"

I didn't understand what he was talking about, I didn't know what just happened, I didn't know why he was here. He should've been in town, but he was here, he was…

"Rina!"

I coughed up the blood in my mouth and gasped for air as some of it slipped the wrong way. As I felt the air filling my lungs again, I grasped his shirt and he held me closer. I think I almost fainted again…

I was still gasping when he spoke again. "Calm down, Rina, everything's going to be fine now, calm down…"

His voice was soft and the warmth of his embrace made my whole body heavy with the realization that finally slipped in: I was about to die…

"Rina-chan, I need to get you out of here," he spoke as he looked around tensed while his eyes scanned the yard that in the meantime became a battlefield. His grip on me loosened and I tried not to collapse into his arms again. I felt Kuwabara approaching and I distanced a little from Kurama even though his hands were still keeping me close, afraid I would faint again.

"Kurama, you managed to come in time!" I heard the tall boy speak and I turned to look at him. His eyes widened in shock and he came closer, speaking so quickly I barely understood what he was saying. "Rina-chan! Oh my God! Are you ok? I thought I killed you there!"

"Kuwabara, please take Rina-chan to the safe-room!" the fox told him. "I'll cover for you."

My tall friend nodded and he took my hand gently before wrapping an arm over my shoulders.

"Is Urameshi here too?"

"He's on his way," Kurama nodded. "I tried to contact Hiei too but I couldn't get to him. We'll have to manage without him."

"Damned runt, he couldn't have arrived in time anyway. Be careful, Kurama!" Kuwabara said in a rush and I barely had any time to say anything.

"W-Wait!" I yelled before I was dragged away. "Shizuru! Where's Shizuru?!"

"She's safe! She's with Genkai, don't worry! Now go to safety! " Kurama answered quickly before disappearing into the mass of demons. I couldn't see him fighting even if my eyes still searched behind me for his elegant movements.

Kuwabara didn't waste any more time and he pulled me after him. I didn't pay attention to where he was taking me and I didn't have time to count the turns he took before we reached the safe-room. We got inside and only then I saw that the girls were safe. Genkai and my best friend were there too and I was never more happy and relieved to see her than now.

"Rina-chan!"

I felt Yukina's cold fingers catching my face and myself being pulled down on a futon. I saw Shizuru kneeling down beside me and touching my shoulders. From there on, I barely registered what was happening around me.

"Kurama's here," Kuwabara spoke. "Yusuke's on his way here too."

Genkai nodded, "Go! I'll take care of things here."

The boy didn't waste any minute and ran out of the safe room. The next second, Genkai and Keiko locked the door and immediately the old master mumbled a spell fortifying the barrier. All this time, Yukina used her healing powers on my tong. From there on, I lost count of the minutes that passed before the door was unlocked again and we were allowed to get out. They told me it was barely an hour but to me… it seemed like time stopped. Shizuru spoke to me all this time, helping to clear the blood and dirt off my face. I realized my movements looked robotic compared to the normal way the others were reacting. I was trying hard to get back in my mind, it was enough trouble the situation itself, and they didn't need a crybaby on top of that.

"Everything's clear!" Yusuke's joyful voice broke the silence when the door opened. "The mistresses in distress can get out now and enjoy the evening air."

"It will be decades before you can call yourself a knight in shining armor," I heard Genkai reprimanding the ex-detective, with a slight smile on her face, "… good thing I'll be long dead by then! I hope you've cleared up my temple!"

"Of course, you selfish hag! Although Kurama is still taking care of stuff," the leader asked grumpily and then scanned every one of us. I raised my head and he gave me a small smile, waving friendly at me. "Hey, Kid! How are you?" he asked the same time he took Keiko's hand, although the girl shove it away to take his face in her hands and looked for injuries.

"I'm…" I started.

"Good, no bruises," she spoke professionally. "Are you hurt anywhere?"

"T-The Hell! Of course not! Who do you take me for?" Yusuke snapped, probably hurt in his pride. "As if a bunch of lowly youkais could do me a thing…"

"I was worried, you fool!" Keiko snapped back turning the conversation in a full words-war that was suddenly interrupted by Kuwabara's yells.

"Yukina-chaaaan! Are you alright?"

The little Koorime smiled and she walked forward to meet the boy. "Yes, Kazu-san, but how about you? Are you hurt?"

Seeing his love's concern in a second the corroted haired boy was all smiles, still blushing furiously. "Me? Yukina-chan, with the power of your love I can't be hurt by anyone!"

"Fools," came Shizuru's bored response at the same time with Genkai's sigh while Keiko barely hold her laugh, much to Yusuke's displeasure.

"…fine," I mumbled to myself my unfinished sentence.

I was standing there at everyone's back watching with emotionless eyes. I remember Kuwabara came over to me to ask if I was alright and I remember I said I was fine. I remember being pushed out of the room by Shizuru and I remember walking the same path with everyone. I still don't remember how at some point we ended up outside the temple's doors, on the porch or what everyone discussed while walking there, it was all a big fuss in my head until the cool, outside air hit my face.

I felt as if I just woke up from sleep-walking and looked around a bit confused when I heard Yusuke speaking.

"I'll go help Kurama with the interrogations," he said.

"I'll come too!" Kuwabara yelled.

"No, two are enough," Yusuke dismissed him. "You go see if anything needs a fixing around."

"Whaaat?! No way I'm gonna be lef-"

"-Kuwabara."

Yusuke stopped in his tracks and turned to look at his friend with a dead serious face I never saw. "Two are enough," he stated and walked away leaving the taller boy standing alone in the middle of the yard.

"I-I'll help you… with the repairs," the gentle Koorime spoke with a strange smile.

The boy looked after Yusuke for one more second before turning his attention to Yukina and it looked like his hyperactivity never faded when he spoke, "All right! Let's get this party started!" and then took off at the back of the temple, followed soon by the ice maiden.

"I'll make a tea," Genkai also added before disappearing too.

"And I guess it's on me to make dinner tonight," Keiko also stretched and left, "I bet they'll be hungry."

"Rina." I turned on my heals to see Shizuru still there, her eyes looking worriedly at me. "The shock… it didn't pass yet, did it?" she asked in a low voice.

"I guess… not," I answered after a short pause. "I was… I was about to die, I… I think I just believe it's incredible I'm still… alive!"

"It's normal," she agreed without hesitation, the same time pulling out a cigar. "Tell me if I have to slap you across your pretty face to make you come to your senses."

In another situation, I would have laughed it out and tell her she'd never change but now… "Maybe…" I mumbled with a forced sigh and sat down on the wooden floor, facing the wall as my back was rested on the railing.

"Do you know what Yusuke did to Keiko at the end of the Dark Tournament when she was practically near losing her mind?" I looked up at her only to see her take a sit beside me, facing the yard instead.

"You never told me…"

"He slapped her until she finally came back to her senses and hit him back so hard, we thought he was doomed," she said as a matter of fact.

I allowed the corner of my mouth to rise up in a poor attempt of a smile. What she told me… was so like Keiko. I saw how natural and cool everyone acted today, in a way it made me feel ashamed for how childish I was being now. I looked up at my best friend and watched how she was lightening her cigar with a red lighter.

"Do you want one?" My eyes went wide open when she handed me a cigar and I took it still surprised. "Do you need a fire?"

"No, I have my own," I answered as I took out her old lighter from one of my pockets.

"You still have that with you?" she asked a bit surprised.

"Yeah, always."

"Hmmm."

I saw how she suppressed a smile and then turned to look at the rising moon. The smoke filled my lungs as I breathed deeply the narcotic substance. I almost chocked with it, so 'hungry' for a smoke.

"How does it feel?"

"Calming…" I answered after I released the smoke. None of us looked at each other.

"Glad it still has an effect on you…"

It was calming, indeed. With every breath I took I began feeling numb and fine and relieved. It felt weird, it felt dizzy and maybe it was because I wasn't a smoker that it affected me this way, but I wasn't in shock-

I heard the voice of none other than Kuwabara when he enthusiastically told something to Yukina who responded with a gentle laugh. They were outside, somewhere at the back of the temple so I couldn't understand what the joke was about. His voice though, made me remember something else.

"Why did Yusuke refuse Kuwabara's help?"

I heard Shizuru sigh before answering, "To protect him."

I didn't understand what she meant. "Protect him from what?"

She didn't answer as quickly this time and from the look on her face she was troubled if she should tell me or not. She decided to do it with a question. "What do you think Kurama is doing right now?"

"Interrogating?"

"And how exactly do you think he's doing that?" she asked me again. I didn't understand why she asked me that. I mean, how else could you get information from someone who…

…And then it hit me. "It can't be…" In my mind I couldn't possibly think of such things so I asked instead, "What do you mean?" The sudden dark aura that covered her eyes was beginning to confirm my suspicion.

"Do you think that after attacking the temple grounds with the intend to kill, Yusuke and especially Kurama will ask them nicely what was on their heads? Seriously, woman, you're sharper than this," she added and then looked up the sky again, taking another smoke from the cigar that was already half finished unlike mine.

"They're gonna…" I couldn't say it, because even if it felt logical it didn't feel right for me.

"-torture them," Kurama finished for me. I swallowed hard after he said it and took another smoke too, suddenly feeling a need for it, before realizing what I've done.

I couldn't see him because of Shizuru's body but in truth, I didn't want to see him. Not because of what he said, surprisingly, but because I was doing something wrong, right after I did the stupid thing of running in the middle of the battle field.

"He may be a fool most of the time but… he has a much too gentle heart. He wouldn't have taken it well," Shizuru finished at the same time with her smoke. "I'll leave you too alone," she added and then walked inside the temple.

I heard Kurama approach me and I instinctively hided the cigar from his view. He sighed when he came to sit next to me in Shizuru's place and spoke with a smile, "You know that I'm fully aware of what you're doing, don't you?"

I gulped and cringed slightly at the same time but he calmed me down, "Don't let it go to waste," he pointed at the tip that was smoking itself. "Don't be afraid I'll judge you. I'm the last person worthy of doing something like that. Just be careful not to make it a habit. It's still bad for your health."

His words meant a lot for me, like they just lifted a heavy stone off my heart but I couldn't bring myself to put it on my lips again, not with him looking at me. I let it burn itself out. "I… it helped me… calm down," I defended myself in a low tone.

"I know," the fox said and looked at me intently. "You're injuries… are they healed?"

"Y-Yes, Yukina healed them," I answered and looked at him too. "How about you? You ok?" I asked back.

"I'm fine, thank you," he told me with a smile. "Did the shock pass?"

"Yeah… I guess it passed," I also told him and, feeling a little embarrassed at my earlier actions, I pulled my legs up hugging them.

"Are you afraid?" he asked me out of no-where. I looked at him a little surprised by the unexpected question. It was indeed true that it kinda turned on some alarms in my head, but I answered as naturally as I could.

"No, why should I?"

"Are you afraid of me?" this time he emphasized the question by looking directly in my eyes and very little closing the distance between us.

I paused. He continued.

"Are you disgusted by me?"

I knew exactly what was he referring to. The torture.

"No," I simply answered. "Should I?" Yes, answering with a question was the best idea when you wanted to escape explanations.

"You should ask that yourself," he responded. Of course, it was Kurama I was trying to bypass. I should've known better than to provoke him. And to demonstrate it to me he added, "I just slaughtered at least fifteen demons and specifically tortured two of them for information. Knowing this, you think you can answer yourself?"

I paused again. Being told frankly what you are afraid of hearing has an effect on you. The redhead just told me he killed some living beings as if he was talking about weather and was asking me if it's gonna rain tomorrow. I didn't know why, maybe because the shock that I thought it passed it didn't actually passed, that's why I was able to take it in so… casually.

"You are a demon yourself," I answered his question looking him in the eyes. "You applied your race's ways, ways that I am sure they were aware of… I don't think they were expecting any pity from you guys anyway. And you did it to protect us. Looking this way, I believe it is me who should feel ashamed by my actions that put you in a dire situation." I sighed and then allowed a smile on my face before continuing, "So how could I be disgusted? I owe you my life, I…" I looked down, placing my hands on top of my knees, the realization coming over me again. There was no need for doubts, no need for more thinking. This man, he just did everything necessary to protect me and my friends. So how could I ask myself if I was afraid of him? After all, "I owe you my life."

He didn't say anything for a moment but then I felt his hand on my head, patting it gently. I am sure that from a distance we looked like an adult who tried to calm down a stray cat.

"I'm glad you are safe," his gentle voice made me look up at him and I found him starring back at me with softness in his eyes, in those green eyes. I felt like I lost myself in the depth of their color.

I'm still lost in them. I never found my way back.

Now… I don't think I want to find it anymore.

"How does it feel?" Shizuru asked me after I took my very first smoke.

Who would've thought that I will be asking Shizuru for a cigarette? Me, the one that was against smoking her entire life, the one giving thousands of anti-smoking speeches to Shizuru and everyone else with every occasion… just who would've thought? I certainly would have not…

"Weird," I finally answered after taking another smoke. Then I snapped, "For God's sake, woman! You just told me…t-t-that! and you're asking me how… how does it feel the cigar?"

"Yeah," my friend answered casually.

That day I smoked my first cigar. It didn't feel like most would say, it wasn't terrific nor awesome.

It was a bit… calming. It helped…

A little.

I rolled my eyes at her answer. "You're crazy."

"Yeah…" she agreed and lightened another one. "At least you've taken it better than I would have expected it. So, what do you think of my crush?" she asked me then looking sideway at me with a sort of smirk on her lips.

I almost drowned myself, partially because I was inexperienced and partially because of the question. "What can I say? It's so like you," I laughed. "Who else would've fallen for a serial criminal, a mad rich man and an enemy of your friends at the same time?...Are you sure you are completely human? 'Cuz you sure look less human than that Hiei and that's a lot! Even I can tell and I don't know him at all. Gosh, I knew you have bad tastes in men but c'mon!"

"Haha!" It was the first time I heard Shizuru laugh wholeheartedly in years. She laughed so much I thought she'll die. But it made me happy, to see her as if something heavy was lifted off her chest. She looked more relieved.

"I guess…all this shit made me a little more demonical," she said when she calmed down a little. "But don't worry, Kid! I'm still the same, the same old Shizuru."

"You'd better!"

"Haha! Need another pipe?"

"Oh, shut it!"

I am watching Hana as she tries to get along with everybody. She's cute, like a little kid trying to fit in a world of grown-ups and meet our expectations.

I also understand Shizuru better, her feelings, her doubts about letting her into our lives. I know, now that I'm in her place. Hana's first experience with Makai and youkai's made me realize how guilty Shizuru must have felt that day… I was too busy being shocked to notice.

But Hana trusted me so I have to pay back that trust. Because that's what we are: a big group of fools – like Hiei would say – that trust each other with our life.

So we'll be fine, as long as we have each other. I'll be fine. Hana will be fine too.

Every beginning is hard. That's how things are.

…but we'll manage somehow, our way.

This was my beginning.

Let's see her beginning now…

Author Notes:

Well? What do you think? I hope it wasn't too confusing... :-S

The next one will be even harder to write… it will be Kurama's time to shine, kind of like a continuation of this one. :) I just hope I'll write him down fine, as I have problems working with him. He's such complexly complex that it's even frustrating most of the times…

When I'm going to post it? I don't know after what Real Life chapter but it will be around the time his and Rina's relationship become official (I still don't know when that is going to happen… I still have to decide from about three or four possible turns for the story, turns that will happen in Chapter 10 and will affect the whole storyline - an important reason I haven't updated recently). This being said, I present you…

Next Shot:Kurama's Book: Shift (still thinking about the title)

Hiei also took an interest that was beyond curiosity on the 'onna'. I saw how he stepped back for me. The last reply of him was:

"So what if they try to attack her? You already have it decided in your mind not to let anyone take her away from you. I can see it in your eyes, there is no need to use the Jagan for that. But be aware… if you don't make her yours soon, there will be a lot of men out there who won't hesitate and won't politely stand back waiting for you to take a decision…"

"Like you did?"

Hiei smirked, "Who said I did?" and disappeared in a blur.