A/N: Last poem of my Brulian stuff. As odd as it sounds, the product of this poem is exactly how I have it structured in my head and for the most part I didn't add punctuation unless it was really needed. I'm still debating if I should just put in commas, and periods here and there. I'm leaving things alone for now.
"Delayed Goodbye" (THT)
There you were turning around
Greeting me with that grin of yours that I craved
Did you know your grin got me weaker than I'd like?
Brown eyes illuminating with delight made irresistible with the right amount of sincerity
You thought I was going to LA
How do I tell you that no, I wasn't coming with you
There was so much I didn't say
I was at a stand still
Feeling powerless and emotional
Where an internal battle raged on
Despite the fact that I had already made my decision
Seeing you again wilted my resolve
My hazel eyes were speedily clouded with fresh tears
At the prospect that this was it
This was goodbye
Please, please don't just leave I silently begged in my head
Not again
Don't make me say it
Even though I knew you needed me to say those words
You knew I couldn't
I'm still not ready to say them
Instead, I attempted to say
Just stay, stay for me and Sam
But the words wouldn't appear
I was thinking I like you, a lot
I know that's not enough
But can't that be okay for now?
I wish there was more time
I've been hurt horribly
I don't know if I can do that again:
Fall deeply with no restraint
Whenever I've done that with someone
I always got broken
And I'd have repair the splintered pieces
I didn't just date for fun
You knew that and gave me the Letterman jacket I made you
Told me,"It means we're going steady,"
And I was content with that commitment
So why'd you have to say I love you
And mess everything up
Arriving home, I quietly admitted,
"I think I fell for you, Julian without trusting you completely,"
No noise was heard as I wordlessly wept
A/N: Poem was inspired by a couple of fanfics I read (including "Stay" by brulianforever), One Republic's "Apologize," and my thoughts on Brooke's goodbye to Julian at the airport and afterward.
