I do not own Nintendo or HAL Laboratories, or anyone associated with the Kirby Franchise...which I also do not own.
In the style of the Kirby anime, and also my longest one-shot ever. Hope you enjoy!
MR. STARMAN, BRING ME A SCHEME!
It started like those sort of things usually did: at the beginning of a peaceful night.
Most of the people of Dream Land want a peaceful, happy, and beautiful lifestyle. Whether they live in Cappy Town, the forest of Whispy Woods, Dyna Blade's mountain, or even Castle Dedede, they want their peaceful nights to stay peaceful.
The universe they live in, however, is far from peaceful. Despite the best efforts of the Galaxy Soldier Army, the Holy Nightmare Corporation is working itself back up to its former strength with every sale of their evil 'Demon Beasts.' And whether or not the citizens of Dream Land know the whole story, everyone knows of the childish designs of Holy Nightmare's best (or worst, if you look at his mountains of unpaid bills) customer, King Dedede.
It seems like every other day, the people of Dream Land are terrorized by the newest Demon Beast Dedede has ordered, be it for amusement or the destruction of the Star Warrior infant beloved by everyone except the king: Kirby. As a result, the days when Dedede doesn't do anything are especially treasured.
It's days like these, when there's a clear sky and no Demon Beasts to worry about, that Fumu likes to spend the evening stargazing. Of course, the only thing better than stargazing is stargazing with friends and family, and that she rarely has an opportunity for: Bun and Kirby get bored easily, Hani, Iroo and Hohhe rarely visit the castle, Lololo and Lalala can never agree on who should go first (both want the other to get first look) and her parents don't stay up late enough.
That night, she had managed to get Bun and Kirby to accompany her, but she also had an unexpected guest: Sir Meta Knight.
"So, why do you want to stargaze with my sister, Sir Meta Knight?" asked Bun, as Fumu finished setting up the telescope.
"The Waddle Dees are cleaning up His Majesty's private observatory, leaving this the only option for me tonight."
"Oh, so you do this all the time?"
"Only on certain nights, Fumu...and for very different reasons than yours. It's just one thing I want to look at...may I?"
Wordlessly, Fumu gave her approval. Meta Knight approached the telescope, and leaned so the eyepiece went through the hole in his faceplate. Carefully, he aligned the instrument and adjusted it...
"...Ah," he said at last, his eyes green with thought; "How that star must miss its planets."
Fumu asked him what he meant, and Meta Knight (carefully) leaned up to explain: "The uninhabited planets that used to orbit that star, they used to be the home base for the Galaxy Soldier Army...and where the Star Warriors first met them, and joined them. The planets were lost when the war was lost...but they could never extinguish the star. That star remains a symbol of hope for anyone who sympathizes with our cause."
Fumu and Bun looked at Meta Knight with admiration...but Kirby, who didn't understand a word that was just said, simply said "Poyo?"
Meta Knight chuckled, and said: "Oh Kirby, if only you were old enough to realize your true significance... as long as the stars burn in the sky, all living creatures have light, life, and hope. And we Star Warriors stand in defense of those things. Our symbol, our powers, our travel methods, all are connected to the stars we represent...I'm sorry, I don't normally express myself this way in public."
Kirby walked up and grabbed Meta Knight by the hand; somehow he sensed the old Star Warrior's embarrassment, and didn't want him to feel it. Meta Knight said nothing, but he hoped Kirby received his silent thanks.
Fumu smiled at the two of them, while Bun...well, he had one more question to ask: "Hey, is that a shooting star?"
Everyone's focus turned directly upwards, where a faint yellow point in the sky seemed to be moving. As they looked, six more yellow streaks appeared. Fumu and Bun got ready to make a wish...but they noticed something just before their eyes closed:
"...did they just change course?"
Fumu rushed to the Telescope for a closer look. The shooting stars touched down in Whispy Woods' forest, yet there was no explosion or fire...
...while Fumu said: "Since when do shooting stars have capes?"
Instantly, Meta Knight went into shock. He sat down as memories hit him like a blow from the King's hammer.
"Sir Meta Knight? What's wrong?"
"...Bun, all of Dream Land is in danger."
…...
…...
The next day, King Dedede was up to his usual self-glorification: having the Waddle Dees plant giant topiary bushes shaped like himself all over Cappy Town. This would be acceptable to the Cappies...if the bushes weren't planted right in front of doors and windows, or even in the middle of the street.
A crowd had gathered around King Dedede's limousine to complain, but since he was busy eating a very gooey doughnut, the King's right-hand gastropod Escargoon responded in his stead: "That girl Fumu keeps complaining we don't respect nature. What king with no respect for nature would plant things this beautiful?"
"Yeah, you planted them alright...you planted them right in front of my restaurant door!" exclaimed Chef Kawasaki. "Now my customers can't even get in!"
King Dedede swallowed his bite and said: "They ain't missin' that much, from my experience!"
Dedede and Escargoon laughed, as Kawasaki moped.
More people complained: "A Waddle Dee tore out my sink to plant one! There's water all over the floor!"
"My letters are all dirty because a bush was planted in the mail room!" said Mosu the Postman.
The mayor added: "I can't get out of my driveway because one was planted in front of my car!"
"This is a clear abuse of power!" exclaimed Police Chief Borun.
The clamor grew to cacophonic levels, until Dedede shouted "YOU CAPPIES BETTER SHUT UP!"
The noise stopped, and Escargoon took the opportunity to talk: "You peasants are never satisfied! We give you an artistic endeavor to brighten up your village, the sort that you are always asking for, and all of you call it an abuse of power!"
"You're interfering with our daily lives to remind us you're king! We can't get anything done with these in the way!"
Dedede growled...but then stopped, snickered, and said: "Ya know, I put a lot of time and money into puttin' this public project up...if you were to compensate me for my efforts, we can move the ones the Waddle Dees put in the wrong places. Five hundred D-Bills per bush!"
Right up until they heard the price, the Cappies saw a glimmer of hope. Then they started yelling again, saying they don't have that kind of money.
"That's my offer, take it or leave it!" yelled King Dedede. "And if ya try an' move one without my express permission, ya get ta spend th' rest a' the week in the dungeons!"
"You heard His Majesty, Five Hundred D-Bills or the dungeon! His word is law!"
With that, King Dedede and Escargoon laughed and started to drive off, leaving a town full of dejected Cappies behind...but before they left the edge of Cappy Town, they had to stop.
In front of them, standing in the road, were seven figures in bright blue cloaks which obscured all of their features.
"So, you're the king here?" asked a voice, presumably coming from the cloaked people.
"That's right! So y'all better move outta th' way or get arrested!" said Dedede with a scowl.
"We want to know the location of one of your subjects."
"The Star Warrior known as Kirby."
"And why? Ya friends a his?"
"Once we find him, he will be destroyed."
"Oh! Well in that case, he lives on a hill by a tree, just outside town! That way!" said Escargoon, pointing to Kirby's house.
The hoods turned to one of their number. That one, in turn, looked at one of the others, who nodded. And that one let down its hood.
To the shock of everyone watching, the stranger had no face, with a head consisting of two large orange triangles, angled like ears. Then it pushed aside the rest of its cloak so it hung back like a cape, revealing the rest of its body: a yellow blob with two stubby yellow points for legs, and two more for arms. It lifted up into the sky, looking like a 6-pointed star wearing a blue cape with a red jeweled clasp...and zipped away towards Kirby's house with a loud 'WHOOOSH!'
Nothing happened for five seconds, with everyone staring in shock at the newcomer's feat. Far away, they heard a loud 'crack' of something breaking. Then, it came back with Tokkori clasped in one of its arm-like extensions. "Let go of me, you creeps!" shouted the bird.
"I did not find the Star Warrior there, only this creature."
The other hooded figures turned back towards King Dedede. "If you lied to us..."
"H-h-he-Hey! If Kirby's a pain in your necks, if ya even have some worth mentionin', then we're on th' same side!"
The strangers all floated up into the air, and formed a circle around an increasingly uneasy Dedede and Escargoon. "Many have told us that exact same thing. Many times, it was a lie designed to protect the Star Warriors."
Panicking, Dedede stammered out: "But...but how does not knowing where Kirby is make me a liar?"
One of them landed on the hood of Dedede's limousine. "That's a good point. So we'll test you then. Either today or tomorrow, bring Kirby out into public. Either at your castle or in this village. We'll take him from there. If we don't see Kirby in broad daylight within two days, however..."
The figure turned towards a nearby Dedede-shaped topiary bush, and pointed at it. Instantly, all of the others flew up into the air (releasing Tokkori) and throughout Cappy Town, uprooting all of the bushes the Waddle Dees planted earlier. The whole process took less than a minute, and a lot of streets and houses were damaged in the process.
At the end of that minute, all of the bushes were piled in a heap in the center of town. The yellow cloaked thing on Dedede's hood floated to the side of it, turning his cloak back into a cape. Then, he rubbed his hands together (sending some sparks flying) and touched the pile...lighting the part he touched on fire!
He flew around the pile, lighting more bushes until it was a massive bonfire, then stopped in front of Dedede again. "Remember, we are testing you. Do not test us."
They left, leaving all the Cappies, Dedede, and Escargoon all as white as a sheet.
…...
…...
"Ah want all the Waddle Dees patrolling the countryside nonstop until they find dat Kirby!"
"Yes sire!" answered Waddle Doo with a salute. "We'll leave no stone unturned!"
"Good, because you'll have to eat every one you don't!" And with that, King Dedede left for his throne room confident in the Waddle Dees.
Just then he met Sword and Blade in the hallways, and Sword said: "Did you meet the Starmen?"
"The star-whatsits now?"
'The dangerous creatures that arrived here last night," said Blade. "Sir Meta Knight wanted us to tell you he hid Kirby from them."
"WHAT?"
"And no, he didn't tell us why, just said that he was going to try to address the problem the Starmen pose."
Meta Knight's two servants fled before Dedede could understand what just happened...and when he did, he ran back to Waddle Doo. "Tell the Waddle Dees to look for Meta Knight as well! They'll find Kirby with him!"
"Oh! Er, OK sire, we'll try..."
"Whaddya mean you'll try?"
"Sire, trying to find Sir Meta Knight when he doesn't want to be found...it's been impossible so far!"
Dedede growled again...and then jogged back to the throne room, saying "Seems I gotta hedge my bets!" as he entered.
Before he had even sat down on the throne, he had pressed a button on the armrest. This way, as he was climbing onto the throne, a massive television screen dropped from the curved ceiling, and turned on.
The screen flickered for a second, but then the familiar face of the Holy Nightmare Corporation's Customer Service Agent appeared, the company logo directly behind him. "Well, if it isn't our favorite Demon Beast enthusiast, King Dedede. Have any questions for me?"
"Ship me a Demon Beast that can sniff out a missing Meta Knight, pronto!"
"Sounds important, Big D, but unfortunately company policy prevents me from sending rush orders to habitual debt-dodgers. However, if you were to pay up your overdue charges of..." Customer Service paused to type something into his massive calculator, and continued after displaying the results (2,237,519,234,847 D-Bills): "...this much, I may be inclined to help you out..."
"Y'don't understand, ya lyin loan shark! There's some guys around who'll destroy Kirby for me, but if they don't do it in two days they'll destroy me! And Sir Meta Knight's got the nerve to go and hide Kirby from me and my Waddle Dees!"
"Oh, I'm so sorry. Guess you'll just have to have a little more faith in your servants; it'll do you good, you know."
"I'm filin' a complaint!" shouted a Dedede at his breaking point; "You're standing by while your Number One Customer gets pummeled by crazy Starmen!"
Suddenly, Customer Service's expression changed from his usual condescending smirk to a much more serious expression. "Wait, did you say...Starmen?"
When Dedede nodded, Customer Service gulped. "I'll have to talk to my boss about this one. Please hold."
The screen suddenly went blank, as Dedede struggled to control the combination of fear and rage building up inside him.
…...
…...
Just above them, Sword and Blade were talking to Fumu, Bun, Lololo, Lalala, and Kirby.
"We tried to tell him Meta Knight would take care of the problem, but we never got the chance. He may be even more scared, and desperate, than before. So we'll have to be a little more careful when hiding Kirby." said Sword.
"His Majesty never checks the attic, but the Waddle Dees and Starmen are a different matter." Blade said, looking at the two of them who could easily fly: Lololo and Lalala.
"You can count on us to keep him out of sight and out of reach!" said Lololo.
"We won't fail our friend Kirby!" said Lalala.
The two warriors thanked the ex-Demon Beasts, who got to work setting Kirby up a hiding place in the rafters. To keep him occupied, they even gave him several containers of food with inedible casings and puzzle-based opening mechanisms, which they hoped he would take time opening up before inhaling. Then Lololo and Lalala started setting up the mobile cover, a series of movable painted cloths which the fliers could use to hide Kirby from anyone who would enter the rafters.
With that set up, Bun finally got the chance to ask: "Okay, so now that Kirby's safe...what are the Starmen, exactly?"
"The Starmen," explained Sword, "are a group of powerful beings who, over the course of the war, slaughtered hundreds of Star Warriors. All by themselves, they appeared out of nowhere, killed, and were gone just as quickly."
"Are they...Demon Beasts?"
"No, Demon Beasts have been seen to attack them as well. But their abilities of speed, flight, strength, and control over heat means they are nearly invincible in a fight. And their primary targets are the Star Warriors, who they hate passionately for reasons unknown. Some have survived to tell the tale, but only because they...outlasted them. The tired Starmen would then retreat, leaving behind a ruined landscape and collateral damage from their battle."
Instantly, Fumu's mind conjured an image of a flattened Cappy Town, Dedede Castle torn apart, Whispy's Forest uprooted, and a whole bunch of innocent beings trapped under the rubble. She looked out the window, and prayed for the success of Meta Knight's plan, whatever it was.
…...
…...
As they were speaking, the uneventful life of ex-Galaxy Soldier Sgt. Dakonyo was about to be punctuated. It's amazing how easy it was to live a solitary life on a deserted island, far away from both friends and enemies, especially for a soldier trained in guerrilla tactics.
When he saw a boat on the horizon, he readied himself with sword in hand – sure, Kirby and his allies knew where he was, but so did King Dedede and Nightmare – he couldn't be too careful.
Sure enough, the boat that pulled up to the shore had King Dedede's symbol. He readied himself for attack...
...when a familiar voice shouted out: "Sergeant Dakonyo, I have need of your skills."
Dakonyo would recognize that voice anywhere, but he needed to be sure. He watched as someone in a green cloak walked into the trees...
...and when it threw off its cloak, revealed itself to be Sir Meta Knight! A mighty Star Warrior who he had nothing but respect for!
"Sir Meta Knight!" Dakonyo shouted, as he revealed himself and saluted. "It is an honor to see you once again!"
Meta Knight saluted him back. "I wish we had time for a full reunion," said Meta Knight, "but we don't. There are Starmen in Dream Land."
Suddenly, as if to prove Meta Knight's point, two Starmen appeared in the sky. Dakonyo moved into the shadows, and Meta Knight hastily threw his hood back on.
Once the Starmen were out of sight, Dakonyo said: "If they are here, then why are we-"
"None of us have the means to flee this planet. And a battle will put innocents in danger, so I want to avoid that."
"But...violence is the only language those maniacs understand!"
"That's where you come in, Sergeant Dakonyo. All we know about the Starmen is that they are powerful, and hate Star Warriors. I want you to use your skills at forest stealth to determine what we don't know about them; their origins and motivations especially."
Dakonyo paused to absorb Meta Knight's intentions...and said: "I know what you're planning. And if it even has the slightest chance of working, you can count on me! Just tell me where to look...and hold on to these for me."
Dakonyo handed over his sword and cap, identifying him as a Galaxy Soldier, to Meta Knight. Meta Knight nodded and said: "Last night I saw them land in Whispy Woods' Forest. Shall we?"
No sooner had Meta Knight said that than they were back in disguise, and heading back towards the mainland.
….
….
With a little help from Coo the owl and Rick the hamster, Dakonyo made his way through the forest undetected. He got to the crash site, where Meta Knight saw the Starmen land, hoping he would find something related to them.
Unfortunately, all he found were scorch marks and a splintered tree. "Apparently the Starmen travel light," he said to himself. "Well, time for some altitude-based surveillance."
Dakonyo spent the time until the evening resting in the trees, to catch a glimpse of the Starmen wherever they went for the night...assuming they didn't find Kirby, of course.
…...
…...
Nightfall came, and finally the Starmen returned to their crash site. The sound of their high-speed returns woke Dakonyo from a light slumber.
"Thank the stars," he said under his breath, "Another few minutes and I might have slept through that!" With that he looked at his quarry...noticing only six of the seven Starmen were present. After checking to ensure the seventh wasn't watching him, he positioned a hand-carved wooden listening tube, and picked out their conversation.
"No trace of the Star Warrior was found." said one of the faceless Starmen, to another.
The one that was addressed shook its 'head' and said "None from my searches as well. Commander Doz will not be pleased." Then that Starman pulled some branches off the trees, and started building a fire.
"Doz is never pleased. I think rage is all he feels these days. But do you remember when we first came into being?"
"What about it, Kel-Ul?" said the other Starman, rubbing its 'hands' together and starting the fire.
"Our existence was nothing but pain until Doz learned how to use these new bodies, and taught us what he learned. He felt compassion then...I fear that has since left him."
Just then, the seventh Starman arrived. "That, Kel-Ul, happened when I learned the cause of our existence. Revenge goes nowhere when held back by compassion, and the Star Warriors need to pay for what they did to us."
"I can see your point, Commander, but-"
The Starman 'Kel-Ul' was interrupted suddenly, by the one Dakonyo assumed to be 'Commander Doz' turning and saying "But? After so many centuries of fighting, do I hear doubt creeping in?"
"No! No! It's just..."
"It's just what?"
'Kel-Ul shivered with fear, but finally said: "I've been thinking...after the Star Warriors are gone, what then? We've devoted the entirety of our existence to revenge, but there's more to life than just that!"
"Life... beyond our vengeance? To be honest, I doubt I ever did think that far ahead. We were never meant to have this life in the first place! We were supposed to die with our planet – but we live, in these monstrous forms! And it's all thanks to the accursed Star Warriors!" shouted Doz, who punched a nearby tree...
...shaking Dakonyo down from his perch! Try as he might, he couldn't avoid exclaiming in pain when he hit the ground.
"Who's there?"
Dakonyo kept as silent and still as he could...but it was to no avail, as he was quickly found and thrown into the middle of the clearing.
"Who ...what do you want?" asked Doz (who Dakonyo learned to recognize by the special cuts on the cape's red jeweled clasp).
"Me? I'm..." Dakonyo stammered, trying to think up a lie on the spot, and lying was something he was not used to doing "I'm just a lonely hermit out for a... camping trip in these woods, I, uh, didn't know this spot was-"
"Enough lies, Galaxy Soldier!"
That outburst caught Dakonyo off-guard. "What? What makes you say that?"
"I saw you...You gathered the bodies of the slain Star Warriors after our planet was destroyed!"
"I've never been a...wait..." Dakonyo paused as Doz's words triggered some long-buried memories in him: "Yes, I...i was there...at the planet Solherbus! But...the natives were plant people, not..."
Dakonyo took another look at the bodies of his captors: through their transparent 'skin', he could see seams of energy coursing around in circular patterns, surrounding a central core. The core, the energy, the skin...
"You know what we are now. What your friends the Star Warriors have done to us. And why they must all be destroyed."
"…if what I think happened to you happened, I have no idea why you aren't grateful! And furthermore, I shall defend them to my last breath!
"That can be arranged. Kill him!" exclaimed Doz to the other Starmen.
"But what about regaining our energy?"
"Kel-Ul, If you have the energy to talk back to me, you have the energy to kill him, so do it!"
With that, Kel-Ul stepped forward, prepared to attack the defenseless Dakonyo. With barely-detectable hesitation, he picked Dakonyo up by the foot, and smashed him repeatedly into the trees and ground! After ten rounds of this, Kel-Ul grabbed a large rock to finish him off with…
…when all of a sudden, a splash of water extinguished their fire! The Starmen panicked, allowing a shadowy figure to snatch Dakonyo out of their reach! The Starmen seemed more focused on the fire than on their escapee, as was noticed by Rick the hamster.
Dakonyo tried to get a good look at his rescuer, and thank him or her…but tiredness and injuries overcame him suddenly, and he fell asleep.
…..
…..
…
Awakening gave answers to the question of rescuer: Meta Knight, who had taken him to some building to be healed by himself and the Cappy doctor Yabuui, with Sword and Blade standing guard.
"Don't try to move just yet," said Meta Knight as soon as he noticed his patient was awake.
"S…sir Meta Knight!" Dakonyo struggled to say through his bandages. "Thank you, but…how much did you hear before you rescued me?"
"Not much. I couldn't risk getting close enough for them to see me until you were in danger. But from what I did hear, I gather you've learned something about them?" Meta Knight asked, to which Dakonyo gave a grim nod…at least as much as he could.
Just then, Fumu and Bun rushed through the door to where Dakonyo was being healed, saying "We came as soon as we heard what happened!"
"Ah, you two!" Dakonyo exclaimed. "Care to hear an old soldier's war story?"
The two children nodded, even though they didn't know exactly what he was saying or why…until he started talking.
"Back when I was just a private in the Galaxy Soldier Army, thousands of years ago, one of my first jobs was gathering the corpses of the Star Warriors that had fallen defending the planet Solherbus. When Nighmare decided it and the plant-people natives weren't worth conquering, our forces tried to stop Nightmare's Demon Beasts from destroying it…and failed. I managed to send them all off to get properly laid to rest…but I couldn't find their Warp Stars!"
"Wait, you mean Kirby's not the only Star Warrior with a Warp Star?"
"Yes, Bun." said Meta Knight. "At least, that was true while there were more than two Star Warriors left in the universe. For those that had them, they drew energy from it and rode it into battle. I too had one a long time ago…but it was destroyed, and I would have fallen with it if I hadn't discovered the sacred sword Galaxia, which filled its role. However, a Warp Star that has its warrior-rider destroyed usually goes dead, instead of disappearing."
"That had me worried, but my superior officer just told me to forget about it. Anyway, Solherbus was the only place I was assigned that job…however, the Starmen claim I was there at the destruction of their homeworld! That's what made me realize: Seven Starmen, and seven Warp-Star riding Star Warriors that died defending the planet! The lost Warp Stars somehow re-bonded to some of the SolHerban natives! The Starmen are the fusion of SolHerban and Warp Star!"
Everyone present gasped
"So, their power comes from the fact that they're living Warp Stars?" Fumu asked, even though she already knew the answer was yes, and then added "But how is that possible?"
Meta Knight continued: "The only way it could be possible is if the Star Warriors who owned those Warp Stars somehow bound their own life force to the SolHerbans. It couldn't happen naturally, so it must mean it was done to save them. But that doesn't explain why they hate Star Warriors!"
As if brought in by some cosmic cue, the wall was ripped out, to reveal all seven Starmen standing just outside the building they were in: Castle Dedede.
"Allow us to explain that." said the Starman leader, Doz: "the Star Warriors could only 'save' the seven of us, so we lost all of our friends and family, our very way of life. The process was agonizing, and we still feel the pain to this day. And the result is that we are all transformed into these … things, unable to take root anywhere or spread seeds of any kind. We would rather have died with our planet, and the Star Warriors denied us the opportunity to do so. So as soon as we realized, thanks to the one you're healing, that there were other Star Warriors out there, we decided to punish them for the suffering they inflicted upon us."
Fumu, ignoring her fear, said "So all your violence was over revenge for having your lives saved? Who holds a grudge over that, and for this long?"
"It's more common than you think." said Dakonyo. "Myself, and Sir Meta Knight, have been around for longer, and our conviction to fight Nightmare is as strong as ever."
Meta Knight, Sword, and Blade all drew their swords and got between the Starmen and the non-combatants. "If the Star Warriors saved you the way they did," Meta Knight said, "it was likely to preserve the memory of your people. And in return you have tainted that memory with hundreds of years of bloodshed! It's not too late to change your minds-"
Before he could finish his plea for peace, Meta Knight was interrupted when a Starman said: "Look; that's the sacred sword Galaxia!"
Doz' featureless face focused on Meta Knight upon hearing those words; "So, you're the great Sir Meta Knight, pride of the Star Warriors…perfect! Now we can kill two Star Warriors while we're here!"
At this, Meta Knight was shocked. "Is killing Star Warriors all you think of? Are you truly so focused on this pointless and destructive crusade, that you are incapable of compassion for any creature other than yourselves?"
Instead of answering, the Starman commander ordered the other Starmen to attack. No one could tell whether or not Meta Knight's words had any effect on them, because they obeyed almost instantly. All seven launched themselves at the three sword-wielders, sending them crashing through the walls into the courtyard on the other side of the castle!
Sword, Blade, and Meta Knight ended up flying through five stone walls altogether, and they ended up sprawled on the grass, battered and bruised. "You're not long for this world, Star Warrior," taunted Doz.
"I can accept my own death…" said Meta Knight through a pain-wracked body, "but not the deaths of all the countless peaceful civilians that my death will cause!"
"Yet another lie. We're only here to kill you and Kirby, no one else."
"Tell that to them." said Sword as he pointed back behind them, where several injured Waddle Dees were visible through the holes in the walls. All the Starmen looked at the carnage…except Doz.
"This kind of collateral damage has appeared wherever you attacked!" exclaimed Blade. "Every time you murdered a Star Warrior, you left even more tragedies in your wake!"
"Besides, Kirby is the one destined to free the universe from the tyranny of Nightmare once and for all! If you destroy him, you'll doom all of existence!" pleaded Meta Knight. "What happened to your planet…will happen again and again unless Kirby grows up and stops him!"
The Starmen looked at each other, in a manner resembling confusion and questioning what they have been doing for the past few hundred years…but then Doz said: "Are you really taking this Star Warrior seriously? They will say anything to avoid their end!"
"But… he's right about those creatures – our actions hurt them. What else is he-"
"When I taught you how to use these bodies, you swore to follow my orders without question. So I order you to ignore what he's saying, and attack!"
And, with much more hesitation than they had ever shown before (about three seconds worth), the Starmen prepared to attack…but just as they lifted themselves off the ground, and rubbed their hands together to ignite them, a powerful force started pulling them backwards!
Sword and Blade stuck their weapons in the ground to avoid being affected…but Meta Knight didn't even need to, cluing him in to what was happening, "Kirby…" he said worryingly.
Kirby didn't share his worries. All his infant brain understood was that his friends were in danger and needed help. So while all that stuff was going on, he had climbed down from his hiding place in Dedede's attic and started trying to inhale the Starmen.
The Starmen, however, were able to fly away from him just about as fast as his inhale-ability tried to pull them towards him. So they were able to resist until Kirby stopped to catch his breath…and then they attacked.
They came at him from all sides, swiping at him with their superheated arms in a way that left a small burn mark with each pass. They attacked so fast that Kirby couldn't reposition himself to try inhaling them again, nor could he run away at all.
Fumu saw this once she and the others ran through the holes in the wall. Horrified, she did the only thing she could do, and shouted at the top of her lungs:
"KABU! SEND THE WARP STAR!"
Suddenly, Doz broke away from the fight against Kirby and flew in front of her, pointing his white-hot arms at her face.
"Retract that order! If you bring a Warp Star into this I will personally throw your screaming body into the sun!"
Fumu suddenly feared for her life…but out of her love for Kirby, she said nothing.
…
Meanwhile, Warp Star had already been activated, summoned not by her voice but by the distress from her heart. It would not be dissuaded now, even if Fumu wanted to.
Kabu knew this, so he opened his mouth with a cry of "Warp Star!" allowing the Warp Star to fly out to its summoner, and the Star Warrior it was bonded to.
….
The other Starmen, meanwhile, also heard their leader threaten a little girl, and paused in their assault on Kirby to stare at him in horror…and in confusion that they regarded their leader with horror!
Kel-Ul asked: "Commander Doz! She's not a Star Warrior! Why would you even think she has to die?"
"She won't die...if she retracts her order and stops the Warp Star from – oof!" said Doz as Kirby used the pause in his pummeling to execute a 'slide attack' on the Starman, knocking him away from Fumu (who rushed off to hide)
Doz recovered almost instantly and retaliated, his punch sending Kirby into the sky…where the Warp Star picked him up and took him away!
Kirby quickly gained his footing on the Warp Star, and flew away. "After him!" shouted Doz as he flew up, the rest of the Starmen following him. They charged through the air after Kirby…
…when a large piece of decorated cloth was suddenly thrown on them by Lololo and Lalala! They were disoriented, and wound up crashing into the castle a couple of times before throwing it off, by which time Kirby, Lololo, and Lalala had seemingly flown out of sight!
In reality, their only concealment was floating under a tower balcony, out of the Starmen's line of sight. "That was a close one, Kirby!" said Lalala, and Lololo followed it up with "Keep 'em busy while we help the others out of here!"
Kirby nodded, and flew above the castle, hoping the Starmen would see him and give chase…
…but that didn't happen! Instead, the gaze of Commander Doz followed Lololo and Lalala, who flew straight to Meta Knight, Dakonyo…and Fumu.
"She controls the Warp Star on Kirby's behalf…she must be destroyed!"
"Wha…bu…but Sir, Ki-"
Before the Starman could say 'Kirby's right there,' Doz flew downwards, on a collision course with the defenseless Fumu, and stopping only when Meta Knight's sword put itself between him and her.
"Move aside! I told her I'd kill her if she helped Kirby, and I intend to keep that promise!"
"It is a promise that has cost you all sympathy from me. At first I thought you killed those who weren't Star Warriors out of ignorance, but now I see your heart is full of nothing but wickedness."
"…You have your kind to thank for that, Star Warrior! After all you took from us, revenge is all we have left!" Doz exclaimed for all to hear, as the rest of the Starmen touched down near him, and Kirby lowered his altitude
Meta Knight continued, his eyes red with rage; "You are mad, and blind to the suffering of others, and your own subordinates are either too weak to disobey you, or just as evil. Either way, I see that your words are correct: Things would have been better for everyone if the Star Warriors had not saved your lives.
"Then you're gonna love what's comin' up next, Sir Meta Knight!" shouted a voice that had not been heard for the entire day up until now:
"Your Majesty!" exclaimed Meta Knight as he looked up, to see King Dedede and Escargoon on a balcony, both holding a pair of strange containers shaped like futuristic snowglobes.
"You so-called Starmen will be sorry you threatened the King now!" exclaimed Escargoon as he turned the key on his device. Dedede did the same with his, and both of them opened at the same time. Out flew two orbs – one orange, one white.
Before an awestruck audience, the two orbs floated up…and then down….and then both orbs suddenly expanded until they were each the size of a house! Then, the orange orb surrounded itself in an aura of flame, grew arms, and a face with a sinister smirk, while the white orb caved inwards, grew arms and feet, and a face with a grumpy grimace! When everything was done, the orange orb had become something like a sun, and the white orb a crescent moon!
"WE!" "AWAKE!"
"AND!" "WE!"
"ARE!" "READY!"
"TO!" "DESTROY!"
"Mr. Shine and Mr. Bright! The celestial Demon Beasts!" exclaimed Meta Knight, breaking the dread silence that had fallen. "What are they doing here?"
"Apparently we're not the only ones've got problems wit these yellow guys!..." said King Dedede…
.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,
Suddenly, Customer Service's expression changed from his usual condescending smirk to a much more serious expression. "Wait, did you say...Starmen?"
When Dedede nodded, Customer Service gulped. "I'll have to talk to my boss about this one. Please hold."
The screen suddenly went blank, as Dedede struggled to control the combination of fear and rage building up inside him.
Mere minutes later, however, Customer Service appeared again. "Good news, 3D! Not only do we have a monster we can sell you on such short notice, you've just qualified for a rare Two-for-the-price-of-One deal!"
"Pretty quick about-face from 'no monsters till I pay up!' What are these Starmen anyway?"
"They're a roving band of beings with strange powers that like nothing more than murdering Star Warriors. Now, that might sound like they'd be our kind of guy…but the problem is that, several times over the past millennium, they've broken into our factories and hijacked our delivery systems, and in the process smashing so much stuff that we got repair bills in the trillions! My boss has been itching for an opportunity to pay them back."
"So you'll send me something to take care of them…but they said they'd take care of Kirby!"
"The Demon Beasts we'll send you will make short work of the Starmen, then you can send them after Kirby whenever you want!"
"…Sounds great!" said Dedede, finally relieved and satisfied.
"Just tell us when the Starmen show themselves again, and we'll send you the Demon Beasts. See you then!" said Customer Service just before hanging up.
.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.
"Seems like the Holy Nightmare Corporation built these guys specifically to deal with Starmen! Now, Mr. Shine (pointing to the moon), Mr. Bright (pointing to the sun) …punish them for their crimes!"
"WE!" "HEAR!"
"AND!" "OBEY!"
"KING!" "DEDEDE!"
And with that, the two giant orbs turned towards each other…and shook their fists at each other.
"ROCK!" "PAPER!"
"SCISSORS!" "SHOOT!"
Mr. Shine got scissors, and Mr. Bright got rock, causing Mr. Shine's face to briefly change to something resembling…disappointment.
Then, Mr. Bright floated down until he almost touched the ground, while Mr. Shine rapidly went upwards, knocking Kirby off his Warp Star in the process….
Mr. Bright walked towards Doz, who flew up to meet him. Doz began to say: "Stand aside, Demon Beast. This is between me, and the Star Warriors and their allies. Leave now and I will spare your-"
Mr. Bright interrupted Doz with a punch that sent the Starman flying into a wall. He then floated towards the other Starmen, who started attacking rather than let themselves be caught off guard like their leader.
They zipped all around the orange Demon Beast, taking swipes with each pass, only for the punches to prove mere annoyances.
Then, Mr. Shine did something incredible: he retracted his arms and legs, and made his face disappear, turning into a perfect image of the moon! Immediately after this happened, a wave of darkness spread out from Mr. Shine, covering the entire sky…and turning day into night, complete with twinkling stars!
The sudden change from night to day gave the Starmen pause, allowing Mr. Bright to attack them all with a massive sweep of his massive arm.
The Starmen, knocked back but not knocked out, immediately went back towards Mr. Bright shouting "Do not move away from him! He's our only source of light!"
It was at that that Meta Knight decided to speak again: "Of course! The SolHerbans were plant-based lifeforms, and so got their energy through photosynthesis! That attribute must have carried over when they turned into Starmen! They must only have a limited amount of energy, and need light to replenish it! But when Mr. Shine turned day into night, there wasn't any light for them to absorb!"
"But then why didn't Mr…Bright just turn himself off?"
As if in answer to Bun's question, Mr. Bright also underwent a change: the fire that surrounded his body suddenly turned from orange to green!
"Chlorophyll reflects green light! The Starmen won't be able to absorb it!" exclaimed Meta Knight in response.
The Starmen too seemed to realize this, as they turned all their priorities to escape…but then a hail of rock-like projectiles bombarded them from the sky, stopping in their tracks! A quick glance upward would have revealed this to be the work of Mr. Shine…but everyone's focus was on the six Starmen who were being hurt without a way to recover! And just to make matters worse, Mr. Bright spat a massive green fireball at them, knocking them out of the air!
"Customer Service was right – the Starmen really were plant people originally! Without light to eat, they're helpless!" noted Escargoon.
"Now you see what happens to those who defy me! Crush them, Mr. Bright!" shouted King Dedede.
The Starmen sprawled onto the ground, ready for Mr. Bright to flatten them…but Meta Knight, Sword, Blade, and Dakonyo (despite Yabui's protests) drew their swords and placed themselves between the two opposing forces.
In response, Mr. Bright laughed…and launched himself up into the sky! He retracted his anthropomorphizing features, as Mr. Shine descended and re-gained his. Mr. Shine landed on the ground, while Mr. Shine sat in the sky and turned night into day…albeit with green light, which the Starmen still couldn't absorb.
The four swordsmen did their best to try and attack Mr. Shine, but the giant moon Demon Beast either rolled out of the way, through them, or knocked them aside… and up in the sky, Mr. Bright rained fire on the helpless Starmen!
All in all, their efforts to protect the Starmen seemed doomed to failure…until Mr. Shine was suddenly distracted, by some object whacking him in the back!
It was a Warp Star, with Kirby riding on it.
"Kirby!" shouted Fumu happily.
Mr. Shine and Mr. Bright turned towards Kirby. Even in the green overlay he still looked as pink as ever.
"THE!" "STARMEN!"
"ARE!" "HELPLESS!"
"LET'S!" "FOCUS!"
"ON!" "KIRBY!"
"A!" "LITTLE!"
Before they could do anything, Fumu shouted "Kirby! Inhale their attacks!"
"Fumu, help us!" exclaimed Meta Knight, over by the injured Starmen. He, Sword, Blade, and Dakonyo were trying to drag them to safety.
Fumu, Bun, Lololo and Lalala rushed over to help…right as a fireball zoomed down from the flying Mr. Bright, straight towards them! They didn't even have time to scream…
…before Kirby sucked it up! With a gulp, he swallowed every ounce of the fireball's energy, and leaped up off of his Warp Star to transform into Fire Kirby…
…but then the fire was suddenly knocked out of him by a rock thrown by Mr. Shine! The fireball was spat back out into the sky, as Kirby flew back from the force of the impact. The Warp Star caught him, and he flew back towards Mr. Shine.
The moon Demon Beast shot another rock, and Kirby breathed in as hard as he could. The rock flew right into Kirby's maw, and he leapt up to transform into Stone Kirby…
…at least he would if Mr. Bright didn't blast him with another fireball from above, and make him spit out the rock!
Mr. Shine and Mr. Bright switched places again (turning the sky dark again), and the attacks were renewed; each time Kirby managed to inhale one of their attacks, the other would force him to spit it back out! And occasionally, the two would switch, preventing them from getting tired!
"GYA HA HA HA!" laughed King Dedede from the sidelines. "All of my enemies gone before the hour's up! This is my lucky day!"
…..
...
Meanwhile, the Starmen were all safely inside the castle, away from the fight. Meta Knight had his sword lit up like a lightbulb, and Sword and Blade had gathered some torches from the walls.
"Thank you, Sword, Blade;" Meta Knight said as he sheathed Galaxia, "My sword couldn't have kept it up for much longer. Starmen, what happens when you run out of energy?"
"Then…the forces holding our bodies together will shut down, and we'll die."
"But why do you care?" asked another Starman, "We're your enemies! We've killed hundreds of your kind! And you yourself said-"
Dakonyo interrupted: "-that you were better off dead? That's when you were the threat, and not the threatened. It may be what you hate about Star Warriors, but they have an imperative to save the weak and helpless, be a symbol of hope for a better future."
"Besides, those Demon Beasts will threaten a lot more than just you unless Kirby can beat 'em!" said Blade.
"Problem is," said Sword, "unless Kirby can get a Copy Ability, he won't be able to! And we don't know how to help!"
The Starman called Kel-Ul craned his head around a corner, to see Kirby desperately dodging the attacks he can't inhale…
…..
Throughout all of this, Doz has been stuck in a wall, unable to see what's going on. When he finally pulled himself out of the wall, he saw the Star Warrior Kirby engaged in combat with the Demon Beasts who had dared to interrupt his revenge.
"Now's my chance… PREPARE TO DIE, KIRBY!" he shouted, and launched himself at the pink ball (who was too focused on the Demon Beasts to hear him coming)…
…and knocked Kirby off the Warp Star! As the surprised Demon Beasts paused in their assaults, Doz ignited his hands and (even though his energy was fading rapidly) prepared to attack Kirby again. Before he could, however, he was stopped…
….
…by none other than the Starman Kel-Ul! Against the protests of his rescuers, Kel-Ul shot up and slammed straight into his commander with all the strength he could muster in his weakened state! The impact knocked off Doz's cape, and sent them both careening into a wall then sprawling onto the ground!
Doz absorbed the majority of the impact, so he lost most of his energy – leaving both him and Kel-Ul at the same desperate state, using all of their willpower to hold themselves together as tiny parts of their 'skin' started to fly off…
…a phenomenon which distracted Mr. Shine and Mr. Bright, but not the Star Warrior Kirby, who had a single-minded determination to triumph. Kirby stomped the ground to focus his muscles, and then began to inhale once again.
It had no effect on the giant Demon Beasts, but it did suck up Doz's discarded cape! It flew right into Kirby's mouth, and he swallowed…and leaped up, feeling the Copy power course through him!
From his perspective, he jumped up into a star-filled landscape where he found a massive gold hoop spinning in the air. He grabbed it, spun it around, and jumped through it a couple of times, before finally forcing it onto his head. The hoop shrunk to become a golden headband, which then grew wing-like decorations just above his shoulders, as well as a red flowing cape with blue lining which covered his back! He struck a heroic pose, and came back down to the ground ready for action.
From everyone else's perspective, he just jumped up, glowed, and then came down with the cape accessory on his head.
"GAK!" exclaimed Escargoon, "Kirby's got a Copy Ability!"
"But which one?" asked King Dedede.
Inside the makeshift Starman infirmary, reactions were a little more positive: "YAY! He got a new ability!" shouted Lololo and Lalala.
Meta Knight jerked backwards slightly in shock; "I never thought I'd see this particular technique in action!"
"What form?" asked Fumu, the others close by.
"He is now 'Hi-Jump' Kirby!"
The two Demon Beasts turned back towards Kirby, who began to demonstrate why his new form is called what it is:
Within the time it took for them to process what had happened (less than a second), Kirby had braced himself, gathered energy into his feet…and then, with a shout of something sounding like "JUNPU TAKAA!", Kirby launched himself at the creature currently on the ground: Mr. Bright!
Kirby smashed right into the living green fire orb, sending Mr. Bright flying up into the air with a pained expression on his face! As he came down, Kirby did the same thing all over again, punting Mr. Bright into the air again!
"Getting hit with a 'Jump Tackle' is like getting hit with a cannonball." Meta Knight observed.
Feeling weakened, Mr. Bright briefly turned orange again. He regained himself however, turned green again, and then moved to switch places with Mr. Shine in order to recover.
No sooner had Mr. Shine touched down, however, than Kirby performed another Jump Tackle, knocking several pieces of rock off of Mr. Shine! And did the same thing again!
Just then, Mr. Bright blasted Kirby with a fireball, then took Mr. Shine's place on the ground as Kirby was sent flying…but then grew very scared when the Warp Star caught Kirby, and brought him right back for more!
A few more 'jump tackles', including some from the sides (as Kirby launched himself off of the castle walls,) and Mr. Bright fell unconscious (becoming orange again). Mr. Shine, enraged, sent a hail of stones to pummel Kirby with…
…but Kirby just jumped up, and used each falling missile as a platform from which to jump even higher…until he wound up above Mr. Shine!
The Warp Star caught up to Kirby just then, and Kirby used it as a jumping platform…to launch a Jump Tackle straight downwards! Mr. Shine was knocked out of the sky…and the daylight returned!
With energy flowing into their bodies again, the Starmen began to wake up again, even Doz and Kel-Ul – in time to see Mr. Shine slam down right on top of Mr. Bright, with an impact so tremendous that cracks appeared on both of them…before they both exploded in a brilliant flash of multicolored light!
Kirby touched down (minus his Hi-Jump ability) and gave a triumphant "Poyo!"
"He did it!" cheered Fumu and Bun.
"Not again!" sobbed King Dedede, flailing around in misery (and whacking Escargoon in the eye in the process).
Doz, meanwhile, looked at Kirby…and then turned to Kel-Ul: "Traitor! You helped Kirby survive the battle!"
"If doing the right thing is treachery, then I happily break my oath of absolute obedience to you! We were in the wrong from the start!"
"Are you listening to yourself? Have you forgotten what they did to us?"
"No…what they did was, give us a second chance at life. That's what you did too, when you taught us how to use these powers. So why didn't you tell us to hate you as well?"
Doz tried to think of an angry retort… and all he got was "The Star Warriors are our enemies!"
"Because they're the good guys? Doz, I don't want to be the bad guy anymore."
"And neither do I." said all of the other Starmen at once. If Doz had a face, it would be mixed between confusion, horror, and anger.
"Fine, I'll do it myself!"
The instant Doz said that, all the other Starmen piled on top of him, holding him down and preventing him from moving.
"They've spent hundreds of years listening to nothing but the ramblings of a madman. But now their true selves have been revealed." said Meta Knight, his eyes blue with happiness.
…..
…
Later, once Doz was bound in a heat-resistant metal cage, the Starmen prepared to leave. Dakonyo, Meta Knight and servants, Fumu, Bun, Lololo, Lalala, and Kirby all came to say goodbye.
"Once we've got him into a prison somewhere," said their new leader Kel-Ul, "we'll start focusing our efforts on the true cause of our suffering: Holy Nightmare Corporation."
"I cannot express my gratitude for this change of heart." said Meta Knight.
"Then express it to Kirby – He's the one who showed us the true nature of the Star Warriors; made us want to be like you." Kel-Ul said, prompting Meta Knight to look at Kirby, chasing a butterfly as if nothing significant had happened at all.
"Well, prove you really have changed, and I'm sure you could be made honorary Star Warriors." Dakonyo said with a salute. "I for one would be proud to fight alongside you if you did!"
The Starmen saluted him back, and then rose up into the sky.
Meta Knight watched them go…then turned back to Kirby, saying to himself: "Even though he's still so young and naive, Kirby has proved he has the best qualities a Star Warrior could ever hope to have – courage, determination, and a pure heart. I wonder, could the time to realize his destiny be closer than we thought?"
This philosophical musing was lost on Kirby…but once he noticed everyone waving goodbye to the Starmen, he decided to do the same, his trademark open-mouth smile decorating his face with happiness he didn't quite understand…yet.
THE END.
Whew! I had no idea it would get this long!
If this story was canon, the Starmen would have commandeered a Destrayer in the finale, alongside Knuckle Joe, Sirica, And the other Galaxy Soldiers!
If you liked it, let me know…and if not, let me know how I could make it better!