Family Ties

A/N: These are a collection of short snapshots of spacer Shepard's interaction with her parents during ME 1, ME 2 and pre-ME 3.

Please review and tell me what you think and let me know if I missed something.

Chapter 1 - Confession

Lieutenant Commander Deidre Shepard sat in the mess and pushed her half-eaten food around her plate as she listened to her tablemates banter back and forth. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams and Flight Lieutenant Jeff "Joker" Moreau were discussing the various meanings and uses of the word sarcasm. Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko was providing occasional assistance to their alien crewmember, Garrus Vakarian, so the Turian could follow the twisting conversation.

With a sudden rush of restless energy Shepard rose from the table to empty her tray and put it on the stack to be washed.

"Something wrong, Shep?" Ashley asked, as everyone at the table looked at Shepard.

"Just thinking about our next moves, Chief," Shepard said in an easy tone and put a small smile on for effect. She carefully kept her eyes on everyone at the table and kept Kaidan in view only as part of the group. She wanted desperately to look into his whiskey colored eyes and let the compassion they always held wash over her.

"Ah…need any assistance, Commander?" Kaidan asked in his soft, hesitant voice. Shepard loved the sound of his voice. As her second officer and the ranking officer of the ground team she could legitimately accept his offer, but she wasn't thinking about the mission and being behind closed doors with him wouldn't help her fight off her infatuation with the capable Lieutenant.

She made sure her smile didn't change in the slightest as she looked toward Kaidan. "No thanks, Kaidan. I need to mull it over a bit more before we discuss actual plans." She kept her eyes trained on Kaidan's shoulder and not his face. She started to move away when another thought occurred to her.

"Kaidan, would you make sure Liara gets something to eat? She hasn't left her room since we returned from Noveria," Shepard said without looking at the Lieutenant.

"Of course, Commander," came his soft reply. Shepard wasn't sure how the Asari culture felt about parents, but the relatively young Liara T'Soni had been there when they were forced to kill her mother and, although Liara said she was fine, Shepard was a little concerned for her.

The conversation resumed at the table as she left the mess, but she could feel Kaidan's eyes following her until she turned the corner. She stopped in front of the elevator and let out a huge sigh. As the Commanding Officer of the Normandy it was utterly inappropriate for her to be so…infatuated with a subordinate as she was with Kaidan.

With sudden conviction Shepard turned away from the elevator and quickly climbed the steps to the CIC. She strode through the door and took a sharp turn to the right and went into the communication room. She quickly sat at the terminal and entered in the destination for the call and sat back to wait for it to connect.

Within a few moments the view screen showed an older woman with graying brown hair and shrewd hazel eyes. "Commander Shepard," the woman said in surprise when her view screen showed who had called.

"Captain," Deidre said with appropriate military bearing. "I called to talk to my mother. When does her shift get over?"

Captain Hannah Shepard regarded her daughter with a measuring look. "In three hours. Is something wrong?"

"Not really," Deidre said with a sigh. "I just wanted to talk, Ma'am."

"Alright. I'll call you when I get off shift, Commander," Hannah said with her usual crisp efficiency.

Deidre shut down the terminal and wearily rubbed her forehead. Her relationship with her mother had never been as close as the one she enjoyed with her father. Deidre knew her mother loved her, but Hannah Shepard never seemed to take off her rank. Even when Deidre had been very little her mother always kept a stiff, military attitude when dealing with her husband and child.

Deidre wasn't even sure why she had decided to call her mother. Perhaps it was the brief moments when Benezia had broken the hold Saren held on her and had spoken those sad last words to her daughter. Telling her she was proud of Liara and all she had accomplished. The reprieve was over all too soon and the brainwashing – "indoctrination" – had taken her over again. Benezia's voice became hard and she had raised her arm to send another biotic barrage at them. Shepard had quickly raised her weapon and a single shot through Benezia's forehead ended the threat. All in front of her daughter.

With a heavy sigh Shepard left the room and walked up to the cockpit. Joker was back in his seat already and greeted her without even turning around to see who had entered his sanctum.

"I'm expecting a call from the Orizaba at 2130," Shepard said without preamble as she walked up to stand beside his chair, her eyes looking out at the rushing specks of starlight in the inky blackness.

Joker turned to look at her from under the bill of his cap. "Your mom?" he asked in amazement.

Shepard suppressed a sigh and gave him a stern look. "Yes. My mother. Please patch it through to my private terminal when it comes in." At his silent nod Shepard turned to leave.

"You have a mother?" he asked in mock disbelief. Shepard leveled a scathing look at the pilot, but didn't deign to answer. Joker ducked his head slightly and went back to his controls. Shepard took a few steps before turning around.

"And, Joker?" she said and waited until he turned his chair and looked at her. "I expect it to be private," she said in a hard tone.

"Aye, aye, Ma'am," Joker said seriously.

Shepard turned away satisfied. As sarcastic and insubordinate as the pilot usually was he also knew when it was time to shut up and follow orders.

Shepard was sitting at her terminal waiting when Joker called to inform her he was patching through a call from the Orizaba. A quick glance at the clock showed it was 2130 on the nose. Military punctuality, as always.

"Deidre," Hannah Shepard said as the view came up. She gave her daughter a tight smile. "I received your last letter. It sounds like you have quite an interesting crew. A regular flying embassy with all the aliens you have picked up."

Deidre gave a slight smile. "They are a good crew. Possibly the best I've ever worked with." She fidgeted a bit and rubbed her forehead. The best avenue with her mother was to be absolutely straightforward. Hannah Shepard would see through – and tear through – any prevarication or small-talk.

Deidre gave a sigh and looked the older woman in the eyes. "I really need to talk to you as my mother. Can we have this conversation off the record and without rank or status?"

Hannah looked at Deidre for a long moment before finally nodding slowly and pushed some buttons on her console. Hannah carefully removed her blues jacket and placed it over the back of the chair before looking back up at her daughter's image. "Alright, Deidre, what did you want to talk about?"

Deidre rubbed her forehead and shook her head. She suddenly wondered why she had chosen to call her mother instead of her father. Of the two of them her mother was the least likely to treat Deidre's current predicament with any empathy. But Deidre really needed a woman to talk to and couldn't talk to anyone on the crew.

"I…ah…need some advice – well not advice really," Deidre paused to get a grip on how to talk to her mother. Asking her mother for advice was like asking a shotgun to shoot only one pellet.

With a deep sigh Deidre dropped her gaze from her mother's stern hazel eyes and started again. "There's a guy I like and I'm trying to figure out what to do." She stole a quick glance at her mother's face and was surprised to see a smile and a look of eagerness on the normally reserved woman.

"A guy?" Hannah said. "Tell me about him." Hannah leaned forward eagerly.

A huge smile came over Deidre's face as she thought of Kaidan. "He's smart, so very good at tech. He's a biotic and he has the most beautiful whiskey-brown eyes. He's shy and sensitive." She gave a sigh as she saw the slight grin he would give her sometimes when they talked. "We've never even held hands, but I just can't get enough of him. His voice…I can't describe his voice. Husky and soft."

Deidre lost herself in the description. It felt so good to finally be able to say these things out loud. To finally give voice to the feelings she had been fighting for weeks. "And he's an incredible Marine. Controlled and alert and when we're on a mission it's as if he can read my mind. I never have to worry because he always has my back. We work so well together – "

"Deidre Nicole!" Hannah Shepard barked the name with the tone of icy command. Deidre instantly fell silent and looked at her mother sheepishly. Hannah leaned in closer to the terminal and speared her daughter with a look of parental shock. "Are you saying he is a member of your crew?" she hissed at the screen.

Deidre couldn't help her self as she withered under that glare like a child. She nodded sheepishly.

"Oh! My! God!" Hannah said in increasingly higher tones. "What the hell is the matter with you? You could lose your Command over this, or get kicked out of the military! Stop this at once!"

"How?" Deidre asked her mother miserably.

"Just…stop it. Don't think about him as anything other than a member of your crew," Hannah said with authority.

Deidre threw herself back in the chair and waved her arms out in frustration. "Don't you think I've tried? I know the rules and I know it's wrong. I can't seem to help it. The more I talk to him the more I crave to hear him, see him."

"I can't believe I'm hearing this," Hannah muttered. "You shouldn't be telling me this. I am supposed to report any knowledge of fraternization."

"Captain Shepard is supposed to report fraternization, but I hoped I could talk to my mother. I really need a mother right now, not a superior officer!" Deidre shouted at her and Hannah looked stunned.

Hannah gave a deep sigh and ran a hand through her hair. "He sounds like a very unique young man," she said carefully after a long pause. "You said he's a biotic? Does this mystery man feel the same way about you?" Hannah asked.

Deidre ducked her eyes for a moment and then met her mother's softened gaze. "Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko," Deidre supplied. "Yes, although we agreed not to do anything in deference of the regulations and the crew. We don't want to jeopardize unit cohesion. Our mission is too dangerous and too important, we know that."

Deidre looked at her mother miserably. "What do I do?" Hannah looked at her daughter with an expression of sympathy. Deidre's mouth nearly fell open. She had never seen such a warm and human expression on her mother's face.

"You have to fight it and keep it hidden, as hard as that will be to do," Hannah said softly. "Put it off until you are given separate assignments, then you can legally pursue the relationship. You can inform HQ if it becomes…serious and be given assignments that will take your relationship into consideration."

"Is that what you and dad did?" Deidre asked quietly.

Hannah smiled a full, heart-felt smile at the mention of her husband. "Lyndon and I met at a symposium and we began corresponding. We didn't actually meet in person for six months, but the instant we did he kissed me and it was…right. He asked me to marry him right then and there."

"Thanks, mom," Deidre said with a sad smile. "I really needed to get this off my chest. I'll follow your advice."

"I'm happy you have finally found someone who is special to you. You were always such a loner as a child. I wish it were under better circumstances." Hannah gave a sad sigh. "I hope to get to meet him when your mission is over."

"He's a wonderful man. I think you'll like him," Deidre said with a smile.

"I don't know how I'm going to tell your father about this," Hannah said with a frown. "He won't like the idea of some unknown man stealing his little girl."

"Gah, mom!" Deidre said in exasperation. "You don't have to tell dad. This was our talk."

Hannah smiled at Deidre like she was a child who didn't get the point. "I don't keep secrets from your father and he'd be hurt if we didn't tell him."

"I know, but I'm afraid he'll drag Kaidan in for interrogation and we haven't even done anything yet."

Hannah gave a small laugh. "That's the price of having a father who is in military intelligence. It was good to talk to you, Deidre. Please don't wait so long to contact me next time."

"I won't mom. Have a good night." They severed the connection and Shepard sat there for a long time thinking about what her mom had said.

Hannah hadn't told her anything she hadn't told herself, but she felt better for hearing it from someone else. She told herself she would ignore her feelings for Kaidan and focus on the mission.

Shepard stood up and stretched as she looked at the clock. With a groan she saw it was 2215 and they were due to arrive at Virmire at 0700 with the ground team departing at 0800. She had better get to sleep so she would be clear headed for the mission. Hopefully, they would find the Salarian team without incident and get the information that had been garbled in the communication. It really shouldn't be too taxing of a mission, certainly nothing to rival what they had already been through.

A/N: I've made a couple of small changes to this chapter. Please review and let me know what you think. I have a few chapters planned for this story going through at least Shepard's trial.