Disclaimer: I don't own anything but this story so, you get the idea.

Authors Note: I may speak slang at times, so, ask a hood what it means. And no, I'm NOT a hood.

Christy: Hello and welcome to Christy Springer! I am Christy. Today's show is on a family feud between Heihachi and Lee vs. Jun, Jin, and Kazuya. Let's bring out our first guest. Heihachi Mishima!!

((Crowd boos as Heihachi walks out.))

Heihachi: Thank you!!!

((Someone throws a tomato at Heihachi.))

Heihachi: ((Catches tomato and takes a bite.)) Thank you for your presents.

Christy: On that note, what do you have to say?

Heihachi: ((Takes another bite of tomato, then spits out some seeds.)) Hmm? Oh, well, um.

Christy: Nothing to say?

Heihachi: Stop interrupting me! Well, my son and his stupid over sensitive family takes things to seriously I me-

((Kazuya runs out and smacks his father.))

Kazuya: Take things too seriously?! You threw my son off a cliff!!! I should have killed you when I HAD THE CHANCE!!!!

((Crowd cheers loudly.))

Kazuya: AND YOU PEOPLE CAN SHUT YER HOLE!!!!!

((Crowd stops.))

Kazuya: That's better. Now, as I was saying, I THOUGHT MY SON HAD THE GUTS TO KILL YOU BUT THE SOFTY LEFT YOU ALONE!!!

((Camera turns to Christy who is painting her toenails and talking on her cell phone.))

Christy: yeah, and like, I was, no, and she was like yahaa, and I said no way and she was like, well my friend says that you li- ((notices camera and changes back to her form.)) There seems to be some tension in here. Let's bring out our next guest, Lee.

Lee: ((Comes out, his lips covered with lip-gloss.)) Like, hi Christy, hi daddy. Hello dearest brother!! ((Hugs Kazuya.))

Kazuya: ((Squirms free of Lee's hold and punches his face.))

Lee: ((Is crying, revealing mascara tearing down.)) You don't love me!!! My heart lays on the floor in pieces! ((Continues crying.))

Heihachi: ((Is sitting eating popcorn watching the two.)) ((Whispers 'This is like a soap opera with a devil/angel/person and a gay guy. '))

Kazuya: I hope you die and go to my lair-er, I mean, hell!!

Jin: ((Breaks through the ceiling in devil form.)) Sorry I was late dad.

((Crowd gasps at Jin.))

Jin: What? Oh. ((Turns back into himself.)) Better?

((Crowd stares at Jin.))

Jin: Whatever

Christy: ((Is sitting next to Heihachi.)) Pass the popcorn

Heihachi: ((Passes popcorn and pulls out a half-eaten tomato. Takes a bite.))

Jin: ((Looks at Lee, then looks at Kazuya who is red with fury.)) Dad, you said your family was straight!!

Kazuya: Well, I lied. We have one gender-bender.

Jin: Oooohhhh, bending things in fun.

Kazuya: Um, yeah, right.

Christy: ((Looks at camera, everyone behind her is frozen.)) Will Kazuya and Heihachi patch things up? Will Lee change his gender again? Will I be able to announce the last guest? Will wold peace finally be found in the arms of a fast-food joint? Find out, next time on.

((X-Files theme song starts.))

Christy: Wrong theme!!!

Director: Oh, um, sorry.

((Theme song plays.))

Christy: Anyways, next time on Christy Springer!!