Nick Fury had seen better days than this. A lot of better days. Better days like when Stark had decided to jump out a window without the Iron Man suit screaming "YOLO!" at the top of his lungs to see how fast the suit could get to him. Ms. Potts almost killed him. Rogers almost killed Stark as well.
There were better days like when Agent Barton had started to play pranks on the other Avengers (Like when he "accidentally" introduced Steve to a website he claimed was for finding funny videos... it had turned out to be a porn website...). There were better days when Thor and Stark decided to have drinking contests. There were better days even when Ms. Potts and Agent Romanoff had synced menstrual cycles (Lord help him if that ever happened again). Hell, there were even better days when Loki set "Operation: Demolish New York" into action.
Today was just not his day.
Some 16 year old girl had apparently found a flyer posted in Times Square that said "S.H.I.E.L.D. Hiring" (courtesy of Agent Barton... Fury swore he was going to murder the archer if Romanoff didn't first...). Apparently, her life was a living hell, so she had dragged her 7-month-old baby brother with her to go find this mysterious spy agency. How the fuck she ever found it, he would never know. All he knew is that now this girl was sitting in the interrogation room in S.H.E.L.D. Headquarters freaking out.
Oh yes. He was definitely going to kill Agent Barton.
But until then, he had to deal with this teenager.
"How exactly did you find this facility?" he asked.
"There was a flyer up on some restaurant window in Times Square. I figured I could go here, sign up for an interview, wing it, and then see what happens." she explained.
Fury covered his face in exasperation. This was going to be hell.
"Oh holy bajesus! Tasha! Get over here!"
The red-haired Russian assassin walked over to the window where her partner, Clint Barton, was standing. "What do you want this time?"
"Nick Fury is interrogating a teen mom." he replied like this was a normal, everyday occurrence.
Natasha looked into the interrogation room only to see Director Fury having a full-fledged conversation with some blonde teen holding a baby that was currently eating said blonde hair. She raised an eyebrow. "Clint?" she asked.
He looked at her. "Yes Tasha?"
"Why the hell do I feel like this is your fault?"
"I don't know. But it probably is."
"If it is, Director Fury looks like he's going to kill you."
"Meh, probably."
It was at this point that the rest of the Avengers walked in. And Tony was the first one to talk.
"Okay, maybe I shouldn't be asking this 'cause I've seen stranger things, but why the fuck is Mr. Pirate socializing with a teen mom?"
Clint started laughing. "See, Tasha, he agrees with me!"
"What is this 'teen mom' you speak of?" Thor boomed.
Steve looked down through the window. "Well, that's a shame. She's too young for that."
"At least she isn't still a virgin." Tony retorted.
"STARK!" was Steve's only reply. Clint started laughing again while Thor still questioned the "teen mom" thing. Natasha rolled her eyes and sighed.
"Did you guys ever catch Loki?" she asked. With that, Thor dropped said god on the floor. Loki glared up at his brother/not brother.
"I'll take that as a yes. Wait, where did Fury go?"
Said Director walked through the door to where the superheroes were socializing and cleared his throat. They all glanced at him. "We have a slight problem."
"The teen mom?" Tony inquired.
"She is not a teen mom, Stark. That is her little brother. And due to certain agents putting up flyers saying we were hiring, she came here looking for a job."
Everyone looked at Clint. "Funny story..." he said slowly.
"CLINTON FRANCIS BARTON!" Natasha yelled.
Tony lost it. "Clinton?! And your middle name is FRANCIS?!"
"I hate you, Tony..."
"Anyway," Fury interrupted, "I need Natasha to go down there and ask her- POLITELY- for information, because she is getting snarky and irritating and I can't deal with it."
"She sounds a lot like Tony." Steve interjected.
"Haha very funny, Spangles."
"Why must you have so many stupid nicknames for me?"
"'Cause I'm Tony Stark."
"That's not an excuse."
"Hey, where's Banner?" Clint asked quickly, trying to stop these two from fighting and destroying the facility.
Tony thought or a moment. "Oh, he's getting clothes on, because apparently walking around in the nude is sociably unacceptable."
Natasha immediately turned around and walked to the interrogation room. She would rather be there then listen to this.
So, this is the first chapter to my OC's story! It's actually cool, I promise... I just have to not get writer's block and everything will be all cool beans from here! Read and Review! Also, ENJOY!