Three times Steve Randle hears the words 'I love You'.
He's only four when his mother is lying in a hospital bed. Her face is pale, her eyes sunken in. She's thinner than he's ever seen her and she coughs a lot.
When she had first arrived they told his dad that she wouldn't have to stick around long. It had already been two years, though.
Steve didn't know that in a few days' time his mother would no longer be breathing. He didn't know that within the week she would be cold and lifeless. He didn't know that these were the last moments he would be able to spend with her.
He still leans into her touch, though, as she weakly hugs his small frame. He still hugs her back, tighter than he normally does and he smiles as she runs her fingers through his hair.
"I love you, Stevie. Ya' know that, baby boy?" She smiles as he nods his head up and down into her chest.
She immediately frowns, though, as his shoulders start shaking. He buries his head deeper and it hurts her. She pushes him away to reduce the pain and pulls him in front so she's looking in his eyes. He cries softly. He tries to hold back the tears, but they don't stop.
"Steve, what's wrong?" she asks, her concern suddenly only for her little boy. She runs a hand through his dark brown hair. He needs a haircut. She already told her husband. He must have forgotten…
"I don't wan' you ta' go," Steve sobs out. He wipes angrily at his tears and pushes her hand away in frustration. She doesn't expect this so immediately she puts the hand back, but moves it to his arm.
"Who says I'm goin' anywhere?"
Steve sniffles and chokes a little before he can finally speak. "I heard Daddy talkin' to Aunt Karen." He pauses for a second before whispering, "You gotta stay, Momma."
Using the strength she has, she slowly pulls him back. "Steve, I'm not goin' anywhere." It's hard to lie to him. It's very hard, but he's only four and he isn't able to hear the truth- not until she's fully gone at least. He has to think everything's going to be okay. He has to. "I tellin' you, buddy. I'm gonna be right here."
Steve wipes at his eyes again. "You promise?"
She pulls her son into a hug and even as small tears form in her own eyes she smiles. "Of course I promise. I love you, Steve."
He buries his head back into her shoulder and nods softly. "I love you, too, Momma."
He's eleven and his dad is angry. He gets angry a lot, but it's not a big deal. That's at least what he told Soda earlier that week when he had witnessed a fight between the two Randle men.
It's no big deal. It's fine. Really, it's okay.
It's never a big deal, Steve thinks, It's not allowed to be.
His dad is so angry at him, though. He is almost never this angry. It almost scares him. His dad doesn't hit him, though. He just yells. He has already kicked him out a few times this year, but he really hopes he doesn't do it again.
He always comes back and his dad always gives him a few bucks, but he hates it. He doesn't like leaving. He doesn't like going to Soda's and explaining he got kicked out. He's in sixth grade- It's embarrassing to get kicked out of his house.
It comes before he knows what's happening, but his dad slaps him. He doesn't even speak. He can't. He was standing there. He didn't even talk back and his dad hit him.
He never hits him. Sure, he got spanked every now and again for acting up, but so did every other kid. He'd never been slapped across the face by his dad's hand, though. He has never known that feeling until now.
His dad seems about as stunned as he is. He keeps turning his hand back and forth, as though watching it will reverse the deed.
Steve wants to scream. He wants to cry and the tears are welling up in his eyes, but he swallows the lump in his throat. He refuses to give his dad the satisfaction.
He's on the ground and his dad comes to kneel at his side. His face holds regret, but Steve doesn't care. His face is stinging and it's all his dad's fault.
"Steve, I'm so sorry, kid. Jesus, I didn't mean that." He's lying and Steve knows it, but it makes him feel like a better father.
Steve looks away. He refuses to meet his dad's eyes.
"Buddy, look at me. I'm sorry." He's trying too hard for something that's just not worth it. "You know I love you, Steve. You know I didn't mean it."
And Steve's teeth clench at the I love you because it's about the farthest thing from the truth. He doesn't make a move to turn and he can hear his dad fumbling with something.
"Here you go, son. Here." He hands him some money and Steve takes it reluctantly. "You know I love you, sport. You know I do."
Steve says nothing as he stands up and leaves for the night.
She holds his hand as they walk past the lake. The sun is glistening off the small waves and the sounds from the body of water echoes. It's so peaceful and serene- something seventeen-year-old Steve is not used to.
She swings their hands back and forth as a gleeful smile spreads across her face. She's so happy around him. He feels perfect when he's with her. His chest swells, his heart beats rapidly and he's content. He only feels this way around her.
She leads him along the bank. Her long, black hair sways as the wind hits it and Steve smiles at how beautiful she looks.
She has him sit down beside her up from the edge of the water. She sits cross-legged before out of nowhere she straddles his lap, smiling more than before.
Steve can feel the hormones inside of him rising as she leans in closer to him. Her lips meet his and Steve momentarily feels like he's in some sort of heaven. Her hand rubs up and down his legs. He pulls her closer to him. She laughs as he squeezes her sides.
He has to smile at this. It's fun to make Evie laugh. Evie's beautiful when she laughs.
She makes him feel better. His dad kicked him out again. It was his mother's birthday. Evie knew something was wrong when she saw him earlier in the day.
She didn't mind his short temper or snappy replies. She didn't ask questions or scream at him. Instead, she led him to the lake.
He lets his hands fall to her lower back as she guides hers higher and higher up on his legs.
She doesn't care if he's angry as hell. She wants to be there for him. She wants to help him through his troubles. He realizes this and he's so thankful for it.
As their emotions deepen he struggles to keep his other feelings in. Evie can tell and she pulls back when he starts to resist the kiss.
She places a hand on his cheek and softly caresses it. "You alright?"
He's having a tough time answering her, but he chokes it out. "Yeah, I'm fine." It's not the truth. He really just wants to cry, but greasers don't cry. And they especially don't cry in front of their girls.
"Okay." She doesn't believe him. Out of nowhere she grabs him in a tight hug. He's confused, but she doesn't let go. "I love you, Stevie," she whispers in his ear.
He slowly wraps his arms around her. The words coming from her lips sound strange and wonderful at the same time. He's unable to smile, but she grips him tighter so he can't pull away.
"I really love you."
He nods his head, careful to keep his emotions from the day at bay. He tightens his grip as well. "I love you, too."
Alright, what do you think? I wasn't quite sure, but I rewrote this like three times. So, I hope it was worth it.
God, I don't know why I like writing about Steve so much, but I do.
Thanks for reading Lovelies!
~Review