A/N: Don't judge my song choice. I know I said I hate him, but I'm in love with this song. Review.
Italics mean, song lyrics, italics with this {xxx} mean the past. {xox} means going back to the present.
Everybody's laughing in my mind…
John stood before everyone, completely alone. It had been years since he had been all by himself. For some reason he just felt everyone was laughing at him.
He laughed to himself. They didn't even know how it happened…
{xxx}
John opened the door and slipped into his bedroom. He expected her to still be fast asleep, but she was up. John watched her as he closed the door.
"Jesus. You scared me." She held her heart, then went right back to gathering some of her things.
"What are you doing?" John asked, raising an eyebrow.
She stopped dead in her tracks and gave John a sad look. "I'm sorry…" She ran her fingers through her hair. "I just really need some time apart."
John just continued to stare, wearing a poker face. "Wait, why?"
"I just need a little time. I promise." She zipped up her suit case and picked it up off of the bed. She walked over to John, put the suitcase down, and kissed him softly. "I'm sorry Johnny." She told him looking deep into his baby blue eyes. She picked up the suitcase and left their house.
He didn't even say anything. He just watched her go.
{xox}
Rumors spreading 'bout this other guy…
Rumors were accumulating that she had left John for Randy Orton. John didn't actually believe that… she said she wanted time apart, not a break up right? Plus, he knew that Randy liked to have more than one girl at a time. Randy was his on screen rival, people would think something off-screen started this rivalry.
John wasn't exactly sure what he thought. He didn't think she actually liked Randy… they never seemed to get along very well. Although he had been seeing them together a lot…
When he saw them walk by. Hand in hand. She didn't even look his way, just at Randy. That really had something.
Do you do what did you did with me?... Does he love you the way I can?...
John clenched his fists in frustration and anger.
'He doesn't love her.' He thought to himself. He wasn't even sure if Randy did love her or not. How would he know? He just had to pray that he didn't.
'He'll never love you the way I do.' John wanted to say. But the lump in this throat wouldn't allow it.
Did you forgot all the plans that you made with me? Cuz baby I didn't
He remembered the day clearly… the day he promised her.
{xxx}
"Someday, I wanna marry you." John said, truthfully before giving her another kiss.
She giggled as he kissed her neck. "Promise you will? We can have our own little wrestlers." She whispered.
"I promise, we can be Mr. & Mrs. John Cena; Maria Cena,I like the sound of that." He paused and looked straight into her eyes. "I love you Ria."
She smiled brightly. "I love you too Johnny." She grabbed his face and kissed him roughly.
{xxx}
That should be me, holding your hand… That should be me making you laugh…That should be me…
This is so sad…
They were only a few feet away from where John was standing. He was holding Maria down and tickling her. She was laughing madly. "Randy, stop!" She yelled. She grabbed his hand, stopping him and held it close to her heart. She laced her fingers threw his.
Randy smiled brightly at her.
John exhaled sharply. 'He's not even worth her time…' He thought. 'That should be me…'
That should be me, feeling your kiss… That should be me, buying you gifts…
John didn't move an inch as he watched her kiss him. She pulled away an John heard a soft sucking sound echoing off of their lips.
His heart shattered.
"Be right back." He heard her say. He watched her get up, and start walking his way. He turned away and looked at the catering table and started filling up a cup with Gatorade and drank it slowly.
He felt someone bump into and looked over. It was her.
"Oh hey John." She smiled. The sight of her smile even hurt.
"Hey, Maria." He trembled with his words. He looked at her wrist and saw a new bracelet. "That's pretty."
She looked down at the bracelet and touched it. "Thanks, Randy bought it for me."
That hit a nerve. "Well it's lovely."
She giggled. "Thanks Johnny." She flashed him one last smile then walked back over to Randy.
This is so wrong, I can't go on, till you believe that… That should be me
John took off his hat and ran his fingers threw his hair. Nothing at all seemed right about this to him. 'She should be mine…'
You said you needed a little time for my mistakes…
{xxx}
"Why do you do this to me?" Maria screamed at the top of her lungs.
"I'm sorry." John whimpered.
"Then why do you continue to do it John? You risk your goddamn life today… did you know how scared I was?"
"I'm sorry…" he repeated in a low voice.
"Sure as hell doesn't seem like it. And you know what else John?"
"What?"
"I lost the baby." Her voice became low. She dropped to the ground in tears.
John's jaw dropped. "Baby, I'm so sorry." He wrapped her arms around her. She sobbed into his shirt.
{xox}
And sure enough the next day, she was gone.
It's funny how you use that time, to have me replaced…
He didn't mean for her to lose the baby… he honestly wanted a child as much as she did. But how could she replace him?
But did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies? Whatcha doin' to me?... you're taken' him where we used to go…
{xxx}
A few weeks after the break up, the boys decided to get John's mind off the voice.
"What do you wanna see Johnny Boy?" Hunter asked, tapping John's arm.
John shrugged. "I have no idea. Just please don't call me Johnny."
Hunter just nodded.
"Well make up your mind Cena, we're here." Adam stated, pulling into the theater parking lot.
"Um… The Blind Side." He was suppose to see that with Maria…
"Okay." John and his friends made their way into the theater, bought tickets and snacks then went to go see the movie.
They took their seats. Chris went to grab some popcorn from Dave's container then John saw his eyes squint. "Hey, isn't that Randy?"
Everyone looked. "Yeah." Adam replied. "Who's that chick he's with?"
"… Maria." John swallowed.
"Oh… do you wanna see another movie?" Adam asked. But it was in audible to John. He just watched Maria and Randy. She looked so happy…
The rest of the guys watched the movie, but John's eyes remained on Maria and Randy.
{xxx}
Now if you're tryin' to break my heart… it's working 'cause you know that… That should be me.
The sight of them broke John's heart. But he couldn't look away.
He only let his heart be broken so much because he had to see her. He could hardly deal without.
Every time he saw them doing something together, he imagined that it was him… because well, it should be.
I need to know should I fight for our love for this long?...
John rejected every date he was asked on and beat up Randy harder than any other opponent. He just couldn't let Maria go. She was still rightfully his… or so he thought?
It's getting harder to shield, this pain in my heart…
As the days went by, more and more people could sense John's depression. He was getting weaker. All of his friends were begging for him to take time off. But he couldn't. He would not only be leaving her… but also be going back to the house... their house.
Xxx
Maria heard sobs from inside one of the locker rooms. She followed the sobs and wound up in front of John's locker room.
She knocked a few times and after no response she walked inside. John was sitting in a chair, looking down, tears dripping from his face.
She walked over and hugged him. "It's okay." She cooed. She lifted up John's face and wiped the tears off of his face. "What's wrong champ?"
He sighed. "That should be me."