She Knows
She was the one who he'd come to for comfort and understanding when no one else was there for him. Because she knew him better than he knew himself. A thought oh so terrifying. Now she wishes she had figured it out sooner. Before the tragedy struck. But life doesn't come with a remote and a rewind button, does it? She has to live with the guilt of unrequited love and countless what if's.
Everything about him gave it away. The way he would always have eyes just for her no matter who else was around. His compulsion to look out for her. The quirky nicknames, terms of endearment and adoration which she had eventually grown accustomed with. The trivial arguments that would spark from the most ordinary things. The way they would make up ten minutes later. The words he bit back but needed to scream at the top of his lungs. It was all in the little things. The things she failed to see. They were there all along.
Bit by bit, this man was unraveling in front of her. Just like an armored knight, as each piece of metal would turn to rust , he would become more and more vulnerable. An image that wasn't meant for anyone to see. Except she did.
She saw through the facade of this broken scientist. She did her best to mend him. Why? Because broken souls mend each other. To keep on living. Was it the temporal dysplasia that made her so cold and incapable of love? It's as if she was cursed to witness everyone around her slowly wither and die. First Ed, the closest thing she had to a paternal figure,let alone a parent, and now Cameron.
Perhaps it would have been better if she hadn't been born. They would still be alive if it wasn't for her. Her dreams are haunted by his last moments. The ghost of him became her shadow. A burden she has to carry for the rest of her life. She can't help but wonder where did they go wrong. Life's too short to wonder.
She has to live in the present, not cling to a ghost of the past like it's her lifeline. Now she knows but it's too late.