Broken mirrors
"Every time I wake up,
I feel as if I'm living a nightmare.
Every time I fall asleep,
I feel as if I'm living.
Every time I look in the mirror,
I ask myself,
What exactly is inside of me?"
Kaneki looked up from the poem he had been reading and sighed deeply.
He snuck a glance at the rusty clock that stood above the kitchen table.
It read 2:07 am.
Kaneki felt himself grunt as he began counting on his bony, frail fingers.
He counted 30.
30 hours since his last meal, an inky mug of coffee.
His eyes rested upon the dinner table.
It was a mess.
Dozens of cans and bags lay thrown on it; a single colossal, desperate bite taken out of each snack.
Kaneki gagged as he refocused on the poem still clutched tightly in his fist, the passage replayed over and over in his brain.
"Every time I wake up..."
Kaneki threw down the book and began massaging his smooth temples.
"I feel as if I'm living a nightmare."
He stood up slowly and trudged over to the bathroom. It had been a while since he had seen himself.
He located the fogged up dusty mirror and gave himself a long look, and his eyes narrowed as he studied the monster that stood before him.
Tousled, cropped ink black hair in a scraggly knot.
Skin sickly pale.
Eyes...
Eyes?
Kaneki stared deep into his eyes.
A dollop of chocolate brown surrounded by a sea of milky white.
As Kaneki studied his eyes, he felt something churn inside himself.
He looked down, clutching his stomach tightly.
Kaneki hadn't eaten a thing in days, he had rejected the Manager's coagulated blood cubes.
It shouted in protest, a pleading cry.
The hunger suddenly became unbearable, and Kaneki felt his mouth open ever so slightly.
A thin fluid rolled off his white quivering lips and onto the floor.
"F...food..."
He stood hunched over the sink, saliva pooling at his feet.
And then...
he felt himself snap.
"FLESH."
Kaneki's body jerked and flailed left and right, the hunger cutting jaggedly into his gut.
He felt his mind run a million different ways, the anguish and confusion made him stumble backwards. Kaneki fell onto the stone cold floor, and his nails dug into his crispy dry scalp. He grabbed a handful of thin hair and pulled with all his energy. With every desperate jerk, a ghoulish scream was thrown through the barren apartment.
He choked on a sob as he stood back up, trembling.
He stalked over to the sink mirror and rested his hands on the smooth metal counter.
His eyes darted into the mirror-and what he saw terrified his living soul.
It's not like he had much of one left, anyways.
One bright, fiery red eye stared back at him, a tiny black dot of a pupil drowning in it.
His eyes widened in fear and he felt another pleading scream squeeze out of his lungs.
The eye darted back and forth, inspecting the rest of his body.
It saw Kaneki's hand rise.
It saw it ball into a tight fist.
Then, it saw the mirror collapse into a million serrated shards.
Kaneki felt the sting of jagged glass in his knuckle.
The seductive scent of iron filled his nostrils, and he felt the hunger dig into his stomach yet again.
He stood there.
Completely immobile.
Immobile.
Trapped.
Gone.
Kaneki's breath came out rushed and frantic.
"What...,"
he breathed,
"Exactly..."
He felt the eye dart back and forth once again uncontrollably.
"Is inside of me?"