A/N: Yes! My computer finally cooperated with me and once again I could write phanphics and stop those plot bunnies from attacking me. By the way, for those who are reading my other story "the music in you" I don't know when I could update so please forgive me!
Anyway, I really hope you enjoy this story.
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
xxxXXxxx
Erik POV
Down once more to the dungeon of my black despair!
Down we plunge to the prison of my mind.
Down that path into darkness deep as hell!
I dragged her towards my home and away from that boy. Just thinking about him makes me sick! I paused for awhile and glanced at my poor damsel in distress.
Why you ask was I bound in chain in this cold and dismal place?
Not for any mortal sin, but the wickedness of my abhorrent face!
I continued on dragging her. Instead of leading her towards the lake, I took a different passageway in order to get to the lair quicker.
Hounded out by everyone
Met with hatred anywhere
No kind words from anyone
No compassion anywhere.
We reached my home and I looked into her eyes.
Christine, why? WHY?!
She just stared at me and what I saw broke my heart once again. I saw hatred and fear. I looked away.
"In your room there is a dress, change and be ready." I ordered her.
She quickly retreated from my wretched presence and immediately bolted the door once she got in. she knows what I could do, and she knows those locks are useless against me. I sat down in the piano bench and put my head into my hands. Everything is finally sinking down. My mind is racing, so many thoughts.
A side of me wanted her to be happy. To give up my own joy just to make her happy, to sacrifice all the things I gave to her in turn for her smiles. And yet there's the dark side in me saying that I should keep her in my home until she learns to love meā¦until I could make her love me!
Erik deserves happiness, right? Every human deserves happiness be it a few seconds or for eternity. But is Erik a man? Everyone says he's nothing but a monster. No one wants to see the man behind the monster and if they don't want the man, they'll get the monster. Erik will be what the world sees him to be, what the world wants him to be!
A loathsome monster that destroys everything it touches.
I stood up and shake my head a few times and headed towards my room to fetch a white mask. I wore a Persian robe over my white poet's shirt and grabbed a jet black wig.
When I got out she still hasn't emerged from her room. I went to the kitchen and fixed myself up a cup of tea. I took a few sips and headed to the piano.
I remembered a song I composed when I was young and still stuck to that horrid gypsy fair. I played the tune unconsciously and I could hear the opening of a door and silent footsteps that stopped a few feet shy away from me. when I was finished I turned and my jaw nearly dropped to the floor.
She was gorgeous, magnificent. The white dress gave her a very angelic glow. I feel like I was falling in love with her all over again, I shook my head and dropped my gaze to the piano keys.
"what do you want from me?" her voice rang in the confines of the room.
"What does every man wants when he supposedly proposes to the woman he loves in front of hundreds of people?"
It was a rhetorical question. My tone was slightly furious as I remembered her unmasking me in front of everyone.
"B-but I don't love you!" she yelled at me and this time I turned around and looked her in the eye. I could see her fear cleverly concealed behind those eyes.
"Would it really matter?" she flinched. "would it really matter if I forced you to marry me? Many couples out there don't marry for love! Many are forced to marry someone they just met, someone they despised! What makes you think I won't take the risk of forcing you to marry me if there's a possibility that you may-"I cut myself off before I say something I would surely regret.
But it was too late, her eyes lit up with realization and I could only hope it was not disgust I saw in her eyes.
"Erik, you cannot make people love someone they don't! it takes time to develop."
Time? If love develops over time, I guess I had too much time. "so you are saying that love is like wine? The more it ages, the sweeter it gets.
"it could be but you know that there are many components to make the wine better? A mistake could lead to bad tasting wine that would more likely be a lost cost."
I flinched inside. I could feel fury coursing through my veins, I stood up and said. "A lost cost? Maybe I'm not good with love but without me Christine, you would still be in the ballet, crying your heart out every night because your father hasn't sent you the angel of music!"
I never knew she had this side of her. She always seems so shy, timid but now I could see her face turn red with fury and she looked up at me and all I could see in her eyes were hatred and unshed tears.
"I asked for an angel of music not a monster!" as soon as the words left her mouth, she covered it as if she could take it back, but it was too late. I imagined that I should feel furious, that I would undergo a rage-filled state where I would destroy the whole room but what happened totally surprised me. For a few seconds that might as well be an eternity, I was a child again, vulnerable and weak. I truly am a monster, even my angel thinks so.
I snapped out of it just to see Christine with tears sliding down her porcelain cheek. "Erik... I-I didn't mean it! I-I'm so sorry!" she stuttered. She was about to run back to her room when I grabbed her arm. It wasn't too tight, just tight enough that she would stay.
In almost a child-like tone I asked her. "Why can't Christine love Erik?"
She seems confused on why I was speaking in third person. She looked down as more tears fell.
"Because I love Raoul, I'm engaged to him."
Emptiness filled my being. I no longer know what to do. I do not want to be a monster any more yet for some reason I can't be a man either, for only with Christine do I dare feel like a normal man.
I would figure this out with the help of my long time friend; Music.
"Christine, would you please sing for me?"
xxxXXxxx
A/N: so did you like it? hate it? I really want to hear your opinion on this one. I'm currently experimenting on the characters' attitude. I'm trying to make Erik a little unstable but not too unstable. I'm making Christine have a little more back bone. Forgive me if there was something wrong with my grammar or anything at all(especially the wine bit, i have absolutely no idea where that came from!) , and please let me know if you think the characters are too OC, okay?
Your obedient servant,
E.M.
