Disclaimer: The show Victorious, its characters and other associated trademarks are property of someone else and not me.
Hi guys this is just a short story i wanted to do. It is probably just going to be a 3 shot in Jade's POV. Jade is probably going to seem out of character in this story. Let me know what you think with a review!
Jade's POV
Falling in love is scary; finally realizing you're in love is even scarier.
"I love you." I just keep walking pretending I didn't hear her.
"Jade, don't ignore me. I know you heard me." Tori says I can hear the sadness in her voice. I still keep walking though.
Tori suddenly stops walking and pulls me to a stop. I finally look in her eyes and wished I didn't. I can't describe the look of hurt I see.
"Jade you don't have to say it, I don't expect you to I just needed to tell you how I felt." Tori says taking my other hand and looking directly in my eyes. "I'm so in love with you." She says as tears form in her eyes.
"Don't." I say harsher than I mean to.
"I wish I could just stop my feelings Jade but I can't." Tori says dropping my hands as the first tear falls from her eyes. I can't stand the feeling of guilt that forms in my chest.
"Stop Tori. You are moving away for college in two months."
"So what is this Jade?"
"A fling, just fun? We were never going to last with you going away to school."
"So what you just give up without trying?" Tori says as more tears start to fall from her eyes.
"I just don't feel the same Vega. This was never something serious to me and was never going to be it was fun." I snap out and Tori just looks at me utterly heartbroken.
"Wow. Well I'm glad to know what page you are on now." Tori says icily. "I'm glad you could have fun. Good luck with college Jade, I really hope you find someone that can actually thaw out you cold fucking heart and you could love them back and hopefully they won't break your heart." Tori says before walking past me. I hear her stop briefly but I don't turn around to face her. "I wish I never fell for you."
"Me either." I said hoping she can't hear the tears in my voice.
I know I should follow her, tell her the truth that I do love her but would my love even be enough for her to want to be with me while she is away at school? I feel my heart break with guilt. This right here is why Tori deserves better, I couldn't even admit that I love her. I squeeze my eyes shut to keep my eyes from betraying me with tears.
After composing myself I walk in the direction of my car suddenly worried about how Tori was getting home. I hope she waited at the car for me so I could at least give her a ride even if she hates me.
I make it back to where I parked outside of the park trail we were just walking and there is no sign of Tori. I will never forgive myself if something happens to her. I try calling and get voicemail so I just leave a message telling her I just wanted to make sure she was okay and that she made it home safe.
Tori never called to texted me back though. A while later I saw her update on the slap right before she disappeared off my page because she blocked me.
The summer dragged on and I didn't see Tori or talk to her again. I don't know why I expected her to. The group dynamic changed. Andre stopped talking to me and Robbie left soon after graduation to go to school early. I found myself mostly hanging out with my younger sister Lauren. Cat and Beck still hung out with me but they never spoke of Tori, it was kind of like she just never existed.
Lauren and my mom both asked me what happened with Tori one night since they hadn't seen her around the house. I told them how we broke up but never went into detail. My mom gave me the sympathetic look that I hate and Lauren just told me it was Tori's loss. Oh if she only knew.
A month after that fateful night with Tori I saw Andre updated his page saying bye to Tori. I guess she was moving to school early. which I guess I understood, she wanted to get away from this place and further from me.
By the time mid August got here I had my stuff packed and ready to go. I spent the last few nights home spending time with my mom, dad and Lauren. As soon as my car was packed up I hit the road. I got into a small school that specialized in directing a few hours away form home. I had a small studio apartment I got through the school.
The school was small and didn't have many dorms because most people commuted locally. I got the apartment through the school versus having to stay in a dorm. I liked the apartment better so I could live completely alone. I was just happy to be away. Home was now filled with sad memories of how Tori and I didn't work. I had a fresh start here and could almost just forget about my old life all together.
I immediately threw myself into school and found a part time job to help pay for food and rent even though my parents offered to pay for everything. I focused most of my time on schoolwork or my actual job and despite my mom being upset I made the decision to stay at the apartment for Thanksgiving break. I had a script to do and I just wasn't ready to face home even though I did miss Beck, Cat and my family.
After missing Thanksgiving my mom made me promise I would be home for at least a few days around Christmas.
I saw Beck and Cat a few times when I went home for Christmas time. They said they would have to come visit my apartment when I said I wasn't going to be staying home for the entire break. It was hard to just leave for an extended period of time when I had the part-time job. Lauren came to visit a few times as well as my parents a few times too. Lauren was 17 so she had a license so she could visit without my parents. It was probably surprising to people but I was pretty close with my sister and it made me sad I couldn't go home and spend much time with her for the holidays. She even got me to cave and tell her about the break up with Tori.
"Jade, I wish you could see how special you truly are, I think you should just tell Tori the truth." She said one day when I finally opened up to her.
"It's too late Lauren. Just lets talk about something else." I said. She never brought up the Tori thing again to me.
After school started back up for break I immediately through myself back into like before. Beck and Cat did end up visiting, as well as my parents and sister.
By the time spring break rolled around I decided to visit home for the break since it was only a week and my boss was kind enough to let me. I was surprised when Beck invited me out the Karaoke Dokie with the gang, which included Tori and Andre. I was going to say no but I did want to see Tori and how she was doing, even if she hated me. I still felt horrible about the break up the past summer but there was nothing I could do about it now.
I rode with Beck and Cat to Karaoke Dokie. As we walked in I could see Robbie with a girl, André and Tori with some blond. I felt my heart plummet into my stomach when Tori kissed her. Was that her girlfriend? I didn't even know she had a girlfriend but then again why would I know that. I had no right to feel jealous over this blonde chick but I couldn't help it.
"Hey Jade." Andre said awkwardly. Guess he still hated me, why the fuck did I come? I saw Tori snap her head towards my direction at the sound of my name. I saw her give me a half smile but I was still annoyed that she brought her girlfriend so I just turned and walked toward the soda bar. I really wish I hadn't come at all. What was I thinking?
After getting a soda I walked back over to Beck and Cat. Robbie came over and introduced his girlfriend to us. I watched Tori out of the corner of my eye talking to Andre and the blond. She looked happy.
I stand there chatting with Beck and Cat about something and get too much into the convo to realize Tori and the blond had walked over to me and Beck and Cat had walked away.
"Hey Jade." I hear Vega say. I see the blond squeeze Tori's hand. It sets an angry fire off inside of me; did they have to hold hands near me?
"Vega." I said in a bored because she doesn't get to know that I'm pissed after trying to rub it in my face she moved on like I knew she would.
"This is Dylan, my girlfriend." Vega says motioning to the blond she is currently holding hands with.
"Hi." The bimbo says. She holds her hand out to me and I just stare at it for a moment before walking away to here Beck is standing.
"Why was I forced to come out? I'm bored and this is stupid." I say to Beck when I reach him.
"Because it was nice to get the gang back together."
"Oh so it will be just like high school? Whoo hoo." I deadpan.
We go back to the table to sit and end up taking turns singing songs well except me. We also get some food while we are here. I try to avoid Tori the whole night and not puke at how up each other's ass her and the girlfriend are. After a couple hours I get up from the table I was sitting at with Beck and Cat and go to use the bathroom As I get in the stall I hear someone else come in When I walk out of the stall to wash my hands I here the toilet flush and look to see Vega come out of the stall. Great.
"I'm surprised Dodger didn't follow you into the bathroom." I say acidly. I don't even know why I opened my mouth.
"It's Dylan and I can go to the bathroom alone." Vega snaps. I smirk and turn to walk out of the bathroom.
"What's your problem Jade? I'm trying to be nice here and friendly even after you broke up with me remember? All because I was stupid enough to fall in love with you." I turn around to look at Tori.
"Yup you were." I say in a bored tone hiding the guilt I feel at the hurt that flashes across her eyes.
"Wow here again I am stupid for thinking you could change." I hear Vega say again I turn towards the door. "I thought we could get past this and at least be friends." Tori says with pain in her voice. I don't walk any further forward but I don't turn around.
"I don't think so." I say. "Why would you think we'd ever be friends?" I ask turning briefly towards Tori before finally just walking out of the bathroom.
Tori doesn't deserve my treatment. I was doing her a favor when I broke up with her last summer I walk up to the bar to get another soda thanking myself for brining my flask with, I drink half of my soda before dumping half my flask in it. I make my way back to the table sitting next to Beck I end up chatting with Beck and then this pretty good looking dark haired girl. I dump the rest of my flask in the soda after I drink another half.
I spend the rest of the time there chatting up this girl and getting her number. I call Lauren and she is already out and said she would come pick me up. After finishing my drink and letting myself sober up slightly I said goodbye to Beck and Cat who force a hug out of me. I said a quick and awkward bye to Andre and Robbie who luckily knew better than to try and force a hug out of me, and then left without saying anything to Vega.
I could never be friends with her not with how I feel about her and knowing she moved on like I knew she would. I drive home and decided to drink some more before texting the girl I met earlier. I had to her house to myself because Lauren went back out so I invited her over.
At the end of the week I head back to my apartment getting ready to lose myself in school the rest of the year. The girl I met and I decided we would be just fuck buddies because their was no sense in trying to form a relationship since I never go home and was still in love with my ex.
The summer following the first school year I only went home for the beginning half of it. I did see Jen, the fuck buddy, a few times and Cat and Beck here and there. There were no other hangouts with the gang again over the summer however, which was good since I didn't want to see Vega. I decided to stay at the apartment the other half take a couple summer classes while I worked. I just didn't want to be home and run into Vega. I promised my mom I would be home for Thanksgiving this year.
After summer I started my normal schedule of classes again but was happy to have more classes to distract me from thinking of Vega. I met guys and girls here and there but nothing serious was going to form.
A few days before I was set to leave to go home for a few days for Thanksgiving I received a call from my mom. I was used to her texting but never calling.
"Hello?" I say and hear my mom sniffle. "Mom?" I feel my stomach drop in panic.
"Jade, it's, it's." She pauses to cry. "It's your father."
"What happened mom?" I ask panicking.
"He had in a car accident."
"Is he okay?" I asked fearing the answering by how upset she is.
"He died Jade."