Only kisses he'll ever get
Its cold under the bleachers, but Dave doesn't really notice the way his breath freezes in little white puffs and how he can only feel his fingers where the hot tears have fallen on them.
Its gotta be late-how long had he walked around for until he'd reached this field? Late enough for there to be stars out, shining brightly so far away from the cold world, late enough that Dave's stomach is grumbling.
He knows he's fucking fat and he that sweats like hell-even now, in the cold, there are faint half-circles under his arms-and that his skin is always a pimply mess. He knows that no one will ever love him-he's too goddamn ugly, and so afraid they'll look past all the disgusting on the outside and see the absolute disgusting that's Dave on the inside.
He looks down at the package in his hands. The razors are delicate-looking and pink. He'd stared at the display for what had seemed like hours until he'd heard footsteps heading down the aisle then grabbed a random package, and the cashier had wished him good luck shaving his legs, faggot lady, and Dave didn't have the energy to care or think, until his random wandering reached the football field, and he's sobbing under the stands and he looks at the razor blades in his large hands and remembers, slashing away at the fog in his mind.
And he slips up the sleeve of his team jacket and plays violin on his wrist (violins are the color of Kurt's hair, and he doesn't think he'll ever get to touch it again) and blood gushes steaming hot from razorblade kisses, the only ones he'll ever get, because Dave can't lie to himself with half-real fairytale fantasies anymore, his mind a slightly hysterical mess.
Dave knows he won't ever love him.
And maybe its better like that.
But its still nice to think that the angels singing around him sound like Kurt.
What'd you think? I have a *slight* obsession with Karofsky- I just wanna hug him and tell him its gonna be okay. Because someday it will be okay. And until that day you just got to hang on.
Nice reviews make me happy, but honesty makes me happier.
Disclaimer-none of this belongs to me. If it did, Kurt and Blaine would be togethor already.