Sasuke: THAT'S NO FAIR! U MAKE ME A GIRL!
Naruto: Actually your pretty cute as a girl.
Sasuke: SHUT UP DAMMIT!
Uchiha Sasuke-kun: I do not own Naruto. it is owned by the genius, Masashi Kishimoto.
Chapter 1: Team 7
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The infamous team 7 was at the bridge as usual, waiting for their sensei. (he was late...AGAIN)
Sakura and Naruto were giving him death glares as their teacher slowly walked up, reading his Icha Icha Paradise. As he looked up from his hentai novel, he noticed there were only two ninjas waiting as the bridge. His visible eybrow was raised in confusion.
"Where's Sasuke? He's usually the first here, if not only to spend some time alone!" he thought.
Sakura ran up to Kakashi, and looked worried.
"Kakashi-sensei, have you seen Sasuke-kun? He's usually here by now"
Naruto walked up with his hands behind his head.
"Yeah! Where is the bastard"
POW
"Don't call my Sasuke a bastard!" )
"Pfft! Whatever"
"He is! And someday he'll bend down on one knee, asking me to be his bride"
sweatdrop
Sakura stopped daydreaming, when she heard footsteps. She looked, and it was Sasuke! She ran up to him and gave him a very tight hug.
"...Let go of me..." he said coldly.
"Sasuke-kun! I was worried about you! I thought you might be hurt"
"You'll be hurt if you don't let go of me..." he said, emotionlessly.
"I'm so glad you're safe"
"...Sakura...if you don't let go of me RIGHT NOW, you'll be next priority after Itachi on my 'to kill' list"
"Oh, Sasuke-kun! You'd never do that!" she squealed.
He raised his eyebrow.
"Oh wouldn't I"
She let go immediatly. He had spoken coldly to her very often, but never had he EVER compared her to Itachi! Naruto broke Sasuke's brooding.
"Hey Sasuke-teme! What's up with you? Your'e even grumpier than usual! Ya get shot in the ass or what"
"Morning, Dobe!" he said with the slightest hint of a smile.
Sakura stood in shock. He never smiled at her! He never smiled at ANYONE! And yet there he was...smiling at -of all people- NARUTO! Something wasn't right. Naruto smiled back.
"'Bout time, bastard! Didja sleep in, or run out of hair gel?" he laughed.
"No, I just wasn't feeling well. But thanks for asking!" he siad with a broad grin this time.
"Are you like, ok man?" the blonde shinobi asked. Since the Zabuza incident they had become pretty close friends. Naruto called Sasuke a bastard, but he didn't really MEAN it anymore. If the young Uchiha wasn't feeling well, it must be something bad, like the flu or pneumonia, or something like that! Naruto worried about the raven-haired boy...er...man now very much.
He constantly worried if he ate regularly. Sasuke often forgot to eat when he trained intensely.
"You got cooties?" Naruto joked.
Sasuke smirked.
"Nah. Some STD." he snickered.
Sakura's eyes bugged out. (O.O)
Naruto grinned.
"Do you know who you got it from?"
He snickered and laughed.
"No. It coulda been any girl in Konoha or Sound even! I've done so many, I lost count!" (lol) he joked.
Training was delayed on account of Sakura suddenly fainting.
(A/N:hmmm...i wonder why...)(author snickers)
As Sakura was foaming at the mouth, Sasuke and Naruto were enjoying themselves, munching on breakfast, kneeling on the railing.
"Didja see the look on her face!" Naruto laughed.
Sasuke almost bust a gut laughing!
"Yeah! The 'who you got it from' line was PERFECT"
"She should get it by now that you don't like her. She's so stupid"
"Hell, I even told her I was GAY once"
"And she STILL chased you? (O.o"
"Hai. She said 'I can turn you straight again'!" Sasuke imitated a girly voice. Amazingly well.
"O.o Nani? Sasuke-teme, I didn't know you could do impressions! You sounded JUST like a girl"
"Uh...yeah...impressions"
When Naruto got distracted by a baby fox, Sasuke sighed.
"phew"
'Almost blew my cover.' he thought.
-
About an hour later, Sakura stirred from her blackout.
"Sasuke-kun? Is that you?" she mumbled as a figure came before her. She focused. It was a toad. (lol)
"Aagh!" The cry echoed throughout Konoha.
-
Sasuke raised his head slightly.
"Hn. Looks like the 'bitch' is awake." he sighed.
As training drawled on, they decided to do a miniature sparring competition.
"First match, Sasuke vs. Sakura." Kakashi said while still chuckling over his Icha Icha Paradise.
Sakura got into a fighting stance.
Sasuke simply walked toward her with his hands in his pockets.
"Aren't you taking your hands out of your pockets?" Kakashi inquired.
"I honestly don't see the need. Let's just get this over with, alright?" he said, looking bored.
Sakura dashed forward, unsheathing her shuriken and a kunai. Sasuke slowly stepped to the right and dodged her attack.
"...god, this is boring..." he grunted.
Sakura came up from behind and used a summoning jutsu. Sasuke put his hand up lazily, unleashing a small bit of chakra, stopping the jutsu. Releasing a bit more chakra, he placed his other hand on her large forehead in the form of an 'L-shape'. A poof of smoke appeared, and Sakura was transformed into...a slug. (LOL)
Kakashi looked up from his book and clapped, obviously pleased with the Uchiha's focus and control. Naruto stared open-mouthed
He grinned stupidly.
"That was AWESOME! She didn't see it coming!" he gave Sasuke a high-five. slap (high-five)
"Of course she didn't see it coming! You actually have to stop gazing dreamily into your opponent's eyes to actually 'see' anything!" he snickered.
"Next match! Naruto vs. Sasuke!" Kakashi announced.
"All right! Now it's my turn to have a go at ya, Sasuke-teme!" Naruto smiled.
"Finally, a worthy opponent." Sasuke smirked.
"Begin!" (Kakashi)
Naruto made ther tiger, dragon, and boar hand signs, and promptly dissapeared.(A/N: mind you i do not know the hand signs for the Rasengan) Reappearing behind Sasuke (masking his chakra) and sweeped his leg under him, tripping Sasuke to the ground. AS he got up, and unleashed a substantial amount of chkra into a 'chidori'.
"Nice try, Sasuke-teme. But I've got you this time! Rasengan"
Sasuke barely dodged his attack. The blonde's technique was so powerful that the rocks behind them cracked and shattered!
He(Sasuke) decided that it was time to kick it up a notch. Immediately, his 'sharingan' kicked in, illuminating his iris with a blood-red hue. As Naruto's infamous 'rasengan' began to flow from Sasuke's hands, he smirked.
"No way am I gonna let a 'dobe' win against me"
Naruto had a broad grin across his face.
"Oh yes you are! You have no other choice! Sweet victory is MINE"
"I do not think so." Sasuke squinted.
Sasuke launched into the air. Naruto dodged easily, throwing a shuriken at the Uchiha.
"Ha! You're FINISHED!" Naruto crowed.
A pair of arms grabbed him from behind.
"I highly doubt it." Sasuke smirked as the shuriken Naruto had tossed collided with a piece of wood.
"What the hell!" Naruto said in shock.
"The simple art of substitution. So limited in complexity, yet so basic and essential to a ninja." he smirked.
He let go and launched into the air again. While in midair, suddenly a sharp pain jolted through Sasuke's body. The Uchiha fell to the ground, clutching his stomach. As he growled with pain, Sakura ran to his side. (Kakashi changed her back for good form) She lifted a hand to help him, only to have it shoved away.
"But, Sasuke-kun!" she protested.
"Shut up! Leave me the fuck alone!" he snapped.
Naruto ran to his friend's side.
"Hey BASTARD! You okay?" He asked.
Sasuke groaned in pain.
"I'll be fine, dobe." he smiled at the blonde.
"Damnit!Don't scare me like that again! What the fuck happened"
Sasuke looked up at his somewhat obnoxious friend.
Should he tell?
Could Naruto keep the terrible secret?
Would it be safe?
Was the time upon him at last? (to tell Naruto)
No...not yet...
"Agh! Just let me rest. I told you this morning that i wasn't feeling too good"
Naruto helped Sasuke sit up, only to have Sasuke faint.
"If you were sick, then you shouldn't have come, stupid bastard!" he yelled as he picked up the Uchiha and carried him towards his apartment.
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Uchiha Sasuke-kun: well hoped you liked the first chappie.
Sasuke: WHAT THE HELL? YOU MADE ME A FUCKIN GIRL!
Naruto: Chill out! You look hot as a girl!
Sasuke: SHUT THE FUCK UP! NOW I'M GONNA NEED FUCKIN THERAPY CAUSE OF YOU IDIOTS!
Naruto: Damn...she's hot when she's mad
Sasuke: I AM NOT A FUCKIN 'SHE'!LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!
Uchiha Sasuke-kun: now now...if you don't stop ranting i'll turn you into a lesbo!
Sasuke: You do and i'll kick both your asses here and now.
Naruto: Is that a threat or a promise?
Sasuke: Do it and you'll find out.
Uchiha Sasuke-kun:try it and you'll become an ugly ass fat chick with facial hair...and acne everywhere...like that ugly girl song...