Legal disclaimer: I do not own SnK or any of the characters. This FF is for leisure only and I am not making any profits out of it.
Fan disclaimer: This FF is inspired by characters and events based on SnK, and is just a comedy. Therefore, it does not follow the official plot, and can distort trash the images and reputations of the original characters.
Finally, I am new to writing FF. Your R&R will help me improve and encourage me to produce better future works.
Enjoy!
*character's thoughts will be written in Italics.*
Act 1:
"It's the end...finally?" Asked Jean Kirschtein, his voice trembling. He was one of the new young members from the 104th trainees squad who has devoted his life to humanity by joining the Scouting Legion. Amongst his peers, he was known as the next great leaders. Amongst his rivals, he was often referred to as 'the guy with threatening eyes and horse-like face".
"What is this feeling? Although we have finally defeated the female Titan and captured Annie's...and I have again, survived from the brink of death...why is that I am feeling more concerned than before? Too many of my comrades and innocent civilians have sacrificed their lives? Or the inner city that I always longed to live in is...no longer safe and mankind has lost all hopes? Or...I..."
"It's only the beginning", said Armin Arlert, one of Jean's squad-mates who also joined the Scouting Legion. Despite being a soldier, Armin was short and appears physically frail who is incapable of fighting the titans. However, he survived numerous battles because he has proven his skills as an excellent strategist with his above average intelligence. Armin stared wide-eyed at the slender blonde-haired girl whose lifeless body was lying inside the giant crystal, because he was still under shock as he was almost killed by this weak-looking girl who transformed herself into one of the strongest titan ever, and how she was brutally wounded by his best friend in his titan form, Eren Jager. Eren had fully exhausted his energy, currently appears to have fallen asleep in the arms of his childhood friend, Mikasa Ackerman, who also fought in the battle to save Eren from the female titan.
"Annie! Annie Leonhardt!...Why you? Why are you a titan! Why are you doing this to us?! How can you kill so many people as if you don't even care!"
Jean angrily drew out his last pair of blades from his 3DMG sheaths, and slashed them them against the crystallized girl.
"You must pay for this and tell us everything you know about the titans! Get out of your shell, Annie!"
The moment Jean's blades hit the crystal, it shattered into numerous fragments but the target remained intact without a single trace of scratch.
"Shit! What the...?!"
Jean continued to strike the crystal with his blade handles furiously, to no avail.
"Annie! Are you playing dead?! If you can hear me, come out right now and face us! You coward!"
"Stop it already" a smooth, calm but authoritative voice interrupted the young and furious man from behind. "Ordinary and physical attacks are futile, you know very well how she was able to block all physical attacks by selectively hardening her skin when she was in her titan form. This structure encasing her is no different".
Jean turned towards the man who interrupted his attack "Corporal Levi...but.."
Lance Corporal Levi, was the captain of the Scouting Legion, commonly referred to as 'mankind's hero' or 'the strongest human' by many, who had the highest titan kills ever recorded in history. First impression could be deceiving, as Levi appears surprisingly young in his mid 20s (rumoured age early 30s), short (160 cm). He seemed unapproachable and cold to many, because of his narrow and emotionless eyes, soft and monotonous voice, and short black hair trimmed immediately below his eyebrows that constantly cast a deep shadow over his eyes.
"Think of the next step. It's not safe to leave the crystal here, the female titan might re-emerge anytime" said the corporal as he stared closely at Jean, then at the crystal, then look up to the tall, strongly built blond-haired man beside him. "So commander Smith, any great plans this time?"
The Scouting Legion's commander, Erwin Smith has been silent all along while trying to think of the next step.
"It's totally unexpected that Annie has turned into a crystal. It seems to be a defence mechanism that can be generated by her will, just like how she was able to harden her skin during combat. If my assumption is correct, then Annie is alive and we must not let our guards down."
Erwin called out to the surviving troops, "Listen, comrades! Many lives have already been sacrificed in order to capture the person behind this female Titan alive. Although we have failed to extract any information this time, we are at a closer step towards finding out the secrets behind the titans. We will seize her, and use all measures to get her out!"
"Stop right there! You have no right to give orders behind wall Sina! You are now officially under arrest by the military police! Drop your 3DMG right now" bellowed a man in his mid-40s, with striking features of short ruffled black hair, receding hairline and a goatee. This man is Nile Dawk, the infamous corrupted commander of the Military Police. He pointed his rifle towards Erwin Smith, and kept his index finger right on the trigger.
"Restrain him!"
Four members of the military police stood next to Nile approached Erwin, and handcuffed his hands behind his back. Levi assumed his fighting stance, ready to throw his punches toward his opponents.
"Levi, you step back and don't provoke anymore fights. Very well, commander Dawk. From now on, you can take care of this female titan shifter. Since she is also military police, you will be responsible for this, am I right?" replied Erwin, staring at Dawk with his fierce, penetrating eyes.
Nile immediately stepped back, his eyes wide-open with a fearful expression, and cold sweat started dripping down his face.
"Don't you under-estimate the strengths of the military police! Troops! I order you all to fire at humanity's greatest enemy, Annie Leonhardt!"
The witnessing military police troops pointed their rifles at the crystal and pulled their triggers. More than hundreds of bullets hit the target simultaneously but failed to inflict any noticeable damage. One bullet flew past Erwin's blonde hair and started to catch fire.
"Commander! Your wig...no, no I mean your hair is on fire!"
"WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU SAY IT OUT! MY WIG...NO! I MEAN MY HAIR, MY REAL HAIR!" he broke away from the restrains, and vigourously patted his head in order to put out the fire. "YOUR USELESS TROOPS WHO HAVE NEVER FOUGHT IN REAL BATTLES CAN'T EVEN FIRE GUNS PROPERLY! MISSING A BIG TARGET LIKE THIS!"
"WHAT?!" Nile shouted back. The fight started to appear like two little school kids arguing. Big sweat drops came down the faces of all the soldiers, including Levi who normally appeared very serious and almost impossible to be shaken.
"Erwin, you just confessed in front of everyone. How are you going to save your reputation?" asked Levi.
Commander Dawk was trying very hard not to control his emotions, but couldn't help but laugh out loud in the top of his voice.
"Don't laugh! You have less hair than me!" shouted Erwin angrily at Dawk, his eyes wide open and face hardened in anger.
"SSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNCCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEE! "
Suddenly an extremely loud and incredibly deep voice came from the direction of the great wall shocked the whole city and interrupted the argument between the two commanders.
It was Dot Pixis, the highest ranking commander in charge of the wall's defence.
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING BALD! IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL AND MATTER OF TIME THAT A MAN WILL LOSE HAIR AS HE AGES, LIKE ME! THIS IS WHAT MAKES A MAN MATURE AND ATTRACTIVE TO GIRLS, DON'T YOU THINK SO!"
Erwin and Nile, now with big sweat drops flowing down their faces, both asked "Command Pixis?! Aren't you supposed to be guarding wall Rose right now? Why are you here?"
"I AM ACTUALLY HERE TO LOOK FOR THE BEAUTIFUL FEMALE TITAN!" Pixis chuckled and laughed while he took out the bottle of whisky from his coat pocket and took a sip, and blushed.
"Cough Cough" Rico Brzenska, the squad leader of the 1st division elite force of the wall guard standing right next to Pixis, "Commander Pixis, please forgive me, but I must be frank that this is not an appropriate time to talk about women, especially by boasting it out loud".
"Hahaha, Rico. I know, but if I don't shout no one will hear me talking from this 50 metre tall wall!" Pixis and Rico both Dot came down the wall using his 3dMG, and walked up to the crystal.
"She didn't disappointed me, and she's also beautiful in her human form. It's such a pity that she isn't just an ordinary human, so that I can convince her to become one of my wall guards".
"Commander Pixis!" shouter Rico.
"Very well, enough of my small talk. Why not I ask our young tactician what brilliant plans he have this time?" said Pixis as he walked towards Armin.
Armin suddenly came up with an idea, stood forth and saluted with his right arm across his chest and fist in front of his heart.
He shouted in his most confident voice "I saw how she was afraid of going into the underground tunnel! She can't transform into a Titan without sunlight! I suggest that she should be locked up by the military police's deepest dungeon, while we find out ways to interrogate her!"
"No! You can't do that!" shouted Nile.
"Oh? No bad" said Levi.
"Very well, recruit Alert", said Pixis as he bent down to the same level as Armin's gaze. "Are you sure that you can come up with a plan?"
"Yes I will! For humanity, I am prepared to offer my heart!"
"MEEEE TOOOOOOOO!" suddenly a female voice with a low tone was heard, and a brown hair middle-aged women wearing heavy spectacles who stood behind Corporal Levi all along suddenly came up and shoved him to the side. She was the scouting legion's branch leader, also known as the scientist, or 'the weird titan fanatic' according to her comrades. She appeared manic, with eyes sparking and saliva drooling from her mouth.
"Branch leader, please control yourself!" shouted James, one of her soldiers.
"Hehehhehhehhehehe...I will be part of the investigator team and perform my scientific experiments on this piece of crystal! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu..."
"Cut that out, deviant" said Levi as he pulled on Hanji's green cape to stop her from bear-hugging the crystal.
"Deviant? Deviant titan again?! Where?" asked Hanji immediately turned around trying to search for her favourite titan.
"I'm talking about you, idiot", replied Levi coldly.
"Levi~ You have no sense of humour, but that's also what makes you so popular".
"Chi...shut up already"
Commander Dawk kneeled down on his legs and grabbed Commander Pixis' leg and cried "NO! LET HER BE UNDER THE GUARDS OF THE SCOUTS! I CAN'T POSSIBLY FIGHT HER!"
"Nile, it's time you and your troops got the act together and prepare yourself for the real battle", replied Pixis.
"Commander Dawk, but we have recently sold our weapons to the business man for money... we can't be fight!", said Marcus, one of the military police's captain, trembling as if he was about to cry.
"Shut up! You want to get me killed don't you?" Nile shouted back.
"ENNNNNNNOOOOUUUUGH!" bellowed Commander Pixis.
"I have no intention to arrest and execute you, or submit you to the military court right this moment. We simply don't have the time! But you must pay for the damages you have caused, by becoming one of the guards to keep an eye on the female titan!"
"And all of you pigs, its time you cleaned up the dungeon properly, every part of it. I'm sure it's full of stinking garbage and insects, just like you", snapped Levi.
"NO! Watching the female titan is already bad enough, but being Levi's cleaning squad is even worse! I will rather die!" cried Dawk.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Narrator's voice:
Finally, the female titan was defeated. It's human form, Annie Leonhardt was captured and will be escorted to the deepest dungeon. This decision is immediately approved by the king.
Meanwhile, how can we escort this giant crystal safely into the dungeon?
Stay tuned to the next episode, "the great escort".