AN: molly/lorcan, for cassie. merry christmas, love!

at first I was afraid

I was petrified

.

little lamb, stumbling through the fields

lost and scared and alone

you've never had to fend for yourself before, have you ?

he b-r-o-k-e you, sweetheart –

broke your d e l i c a t e, fragile heart

{he hopes it hurt twice as much as you hurt him}

but you TRUSTED him

and what were you supposed to do when you caught him with ::another girl::

except kick him out ?

but he found ways to get Revenge

he always did.

and now you're ({[alone]})

left to pick up the p i e c e s

and try to sleep in these wretched RUINS and \s/h\a/t\t/e\r/e\d/ dreams

but darling, it's okay

it's going to be alright

in the end.

.

i'm a survivor

.

and then lorcan scamander comes along

{what? that overexcited, spotty boy you used to have potions with?}

all goofysmiles and floppy hair

and he still trips over his own feet sometimes

and he's still freakishly TALL

and he still never knows the right thing to say

and he still jumps for joy when you somuchassmile at him

and he still believes in canadian 'hibbly-vrumps'

and he makes your HEART s k i p abeat.

.

i thought that I could never live

without you by my side

.

he tries to f-i-x what his brother left behind

but it's not easy; it's never easy

you're stubborn as a mule and painfully PROUD to boot

and accepting help is the most desperatedesperatedesperate sign of weakness

but lorcan was never one for giving up, no

before you know it

you're going out for dinner every night

and living in the same house

and sleeping in the same bed

and +arguing- over who drank the last of the orange juice

and who the hell is lysander?

{and you know you can't resist that kicked-puppy face}

.

but I grew strong

and I learned how to get along

.

you're in |C.O.N.R.O.L| now

you have LORCAN and a messy house and a risky job and a bipolar cat and –

you have a life.

it's nothing like what you dreamt of

{lysander, stylish apartments, pressed suits}

but you wouldn't change a thing

because when the world was CRASHing down around you

and you were on your knees

the smoke of your own disasters clouding your future

lorcan taught you how to fall in love again

and even though it seemed impossible

you made it out in the end.

.

i'm a survivor.