Disclaimer: Most of the characters in this story belong to Janet Evanovich and are used here without permission. No copyright infringement is intended.

Marissa Carter is my own fictional character.

This is neither a Babe or Cupcake story.

"Hmmm. It says here that the five most deadliest jobs for men are fishermen, logging workers, pilots, iron or steel workers and farmers or ranchers." Marissa said as she stared intently at the page before her.

Sitting in a nondescript building in downtown Trenton was not her idea of fun. To make it even more irritating she was sitting with Ranger waiting see their assigned psychiatrist Dr. Andrew Paisley. Talk about having an interesting day.

Ranger leaned forward and glanced at the front of the magazine in her hands. "And you expect me to take this list seriously?"

"What?"

"It's in Glamour Magazine that's what?"

"What's wrong with that? It's a highly respected periodical."

Ranger snorted. "You should know better Mari. Where the hell are they getting their information?"

"It's quoted as being from the Bureau of Labor Statistics' National Census of Fatal Occupation Injuries report." she explained.

"I rest my case." he said smugly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked with a frown.

"Mari, you and I both know that such bureaus and departments are fronts for what they really do."

"And just what do they really do?"

He stared at her. "If you don't know then that information is not within the scope of your pay grade."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Excuse me? Did you just go all superior on me?"

Silence.

She glared at him before turning her focus back to the magazine. "Now, as I was saying," she sent a sharp look at Ranger, "It doesn't say anything here about bounty hunters or black ops."

Ranger failed to see the connection. "So?"

"So it means that you can stop cock-blocking yourself. Your job is not that dangerous."

"Mari." His tone held a warning.

"Look, all I'm saying is that you need to stop punishing yourself for reasons beyond my mental capacity and enjoy the fact that there could be a woman out there who will love you, assault rifle and all."

"Didn't we already have this discussion? I remember using the words butt out and none of your business."

She waved a dismissive hand at him. "I can't remember. You usually tell me those things once a day. It's hard to keep track."

"And yet still, here you are again being a pain in my ass."

"Sorry. But your threats only work on women that actually want something from you, or are afraid of you." she said giving him a tight smile.

"And you're none of those things?"

She shook her head. "Not since I kicked your butt during that sparing session four years ago."

"I let you win." he shot back defensively.

"Let me?" she balked. "As I recall I pinned you to the mat in under a minute. And not only did I have to use my Xena strength, but I also had to rely upon my concentration skills to block out the sound of your whining."

He glared at her. "I don't whine Agent Carter." His eyes narrowed. "And as I recalled, you were fighting dirty and brushing your breasts all over people while we were grappling."

"I can't help the fact that I have breasts Carlos. It's not like I can put them in a locker or store them in my pocket. And if you didn't want to spar with me Tank and Les were right there too. You're just a sore loser and mad because you got beaten by a woman."

"You didn't beat me. Like I said, I let you win."

"Puuhleez." Marissa said rolling her eyes. "Don't be ashamed to admit you're getting old and rusty. You need to leave all that fighting and running around to the younger boys. You're almost forty. Things break easier and it takes longer to heal now. I'm sure General Miller would be happy to give you a desk job at the Defense Department. Something in training perhaps."

Ranger's eyebrows shot up. "Are you seriously trying to fucking piss me off?"

She stared at him innocently and shrugged. "I'm just saying."

Marissa went back to reading her magazine while trying to keep the smile that was threatening to break free from within her at bay. Five, four, three, two...

"I'm not getting old or losing my edge. I'm still the best in my field. And I'm disappointed that you have so little faith in me to even think about me like that." His eyes glinted dangerously at her.

"I do have faith in you Carlos. But the reality of the situation is that sometimes we just have to let go and take the path that life wants us to lead."

He gave her a blank look. What the hell was she talking about? Better question was why was she talking like a Buddhist monk?

"And what path is life wanting you to lead?" he asked just for the hell of it.

She closed her eyes momentarily then huffed out a loud sigh. "I want to not be weird."

Ranger blinked. "What?"

"Weird." she said again as she snapped the magazine closed and slapped it viciously back down on the coffee table. "I lack emotional skills Carlos. According to Dr. Paisley, I emotionally extract myself from highly expressive situations, and cocoon myself in a shell of self-preservation instead of dealing with what I'm feeling. He said that I intentionally sabotage my relationships for fear of exposing my weaknesses and having to adapt and accept my vulnerabilities."

Wow, Ranger thought, what a mouthful of bullshit. No wonder he never like Dr. Paisley. The man was set on ruining the lives of perfectly good people with all his psychological bullshit.

"What I don't get is why you're even listening to Paisley. He's a moron. Everyone to him lacks emotional skills. If I were you I would take everything he says with a grain of salt. You're not weird."

"Carlos the man is well respected at the Justice Department. Yes, he's a little clinical, but I can respect brilliance when I see it."

Ranger made a nondescript noise at the back of his throat.

"Promise you'll be nice to him when we go in." Marissa said.

Blank look.

"Carlos, I don't want to spend half the time in there trying to interpret your silence to him."

"No promises."

"Carlos!"

"What? Look you and I both agree that this psycho mumbo-jumbo is all part of the torture we have to go through in order to do our jobs."

"So?"

"So messing with Dr. Evil in there is how we endure the torture."

She sent him a chagrined look. "Be nice. He's my shrink too."

"Don't you find that a little strange that you and I are assigned the same psychiatrist?"

She thought about that for a few seconds. "Errr...no."

His brow furrowed. "Mari."

"Think about it. You and I are close friends. Our bosses know that. So don't you think they're a little concerned that your craziness might rub off on me? Oh wait. Too late."

"My orders were to see the shrink twice a week. I'm only here because of protocol. Nowhere in my directive did it say that I had to like him or even be nice to him."

"But you have too." Marissa argued. "Don't you get it? If we don't comply he's going to write you up as unfit for active duty."

A look of worry flashed over Ranger's face. "You think he would do that?"

She looked thoughtful. "I can't say for sure, but there's a high possibility. The military has enough crazy people to deal with within their ranks already. And most of them are not trained killers like you. No offense."

"None taken." he said with a nod of his head.

"All I'm saying Carlos is play their game to get what you want. Cause I know sitting behind a desk, entombed in paperwork and policy is not your idea of fun on the job. You like going out into the field...a little bit too much if you ask me, but that's neither here nor there."

"Are you implying that I like the rush of war and death?"

She nodded. "Pretty much. Nothing to be ashamed of mind you, as I believe everyone has a right to finding and enjoying their thing."

"Their thing?"

"Yeah. You know? That thing that you would do for free. Your passion as my mother would say."

"So you're saying that my passion is to kill people?"

"Sort of. You're an adrenaline addict."

"So on top of me being a killer, I'm also an addict."

"Yes, and it's not necessarily a bad thing. In ancient cultures those sort of traits were highly revered." she said emphatically.

Ranger shook his head as a soft laugh bubbled out of him. Leave it to Mari to assess him in the worse possible light, but yet make him seem like a hero in the process.

She was looking at him with a concerned look in her eyes. "What? Did I say something funny?"

He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. "No, you said something enlightening."

"Really?" News to her.

The door to Dr. Paisley's office opened and the distinguished looking psychiatrist poked his head out. "Come on in you two."

Marissa and Ranger looked at each other and grimaced. They knew that the doctor had something planned up his sleeve to get them to open up about their "psychological progress". A fact that Ranger and Marissa were hoping to avoid all together.

"Say nothing." Ranger muttered under his breath as they got up and made their way into the office.

"What?" Marissa whispered. "You know I can't do that. It's rude."

"You're rude."

"I am not." she argued.

He shot her a dubious look.

"Okay, so maybe I am a little. But I'm not going to be rude to Dr. P just because you don't want to do the exercise of the day. Why can't you be rude?'

"You don't want me being rude. It may not end well for him."

"Who will what not end well for?" Dr. Paisley chimed in as they took their seats in front of him.

"Errr...nobody." Marissa said quickly. Best not to rile him up before their session even began.

Dr. Paisley studied them for a minute. Something was going on with these two as usual. He'd never had two patients as close as they were, who were so vastly different in their psychological processes. He was even thinking about writing a paper on the two of them for a journal article. But before he got that far he still had a lot to learn about them; and so far that had been proving to be very difficult. "Agent Carter, the last time we spoke we addressed your protectiveness of Sergeant Mañoso."

"Can you just call us Carter and Mañoso, or Marissa and Carlos?" Marissa asked. "Titles make us uncomfortable."

"Why do they make you uncomfortable?" Dr. Paisley asked.

Marissa and Ranger exchanged a meaningful look but said nothing.

"I see." Dr. Paisley said knowingly. "Still protective of each other's privacy. Well this may prove to be helpful towards our exercise today. We're going to play a little game."

"I don't like games." Ranger said stoically.

"He really doesn't." Marissa chimed in.

"What about games don't you like Ser...Carlos?"

"It's a waste of time and the end result is mediocre in satisfaction."

"I like games." Marissa muttered.

Ranger glared at her and muttered from the side of his mouth. "Didn't we have a discussion about this before we came in here? Silence, remember?"

"But I think the game might be fun." she muttered back.

"You don't know what the game is."

"It doesn't matter. It's a game. By law all games are supposed to be fun."

"Who's law?"

"The Universe."

"Weak argument."

"Well I'm sure it's in the Bible." she said.

Ranger shot her an incredulous look. "You're using God now to justify your fondness for games? Shame on you Mari."

"All I'm saying is Jesus was a child once. He must have played games. All kids do. And since he was the son of God I'm sure God wanted him to have as much fun as possible, you know, because he was his son."

Ranger tilted his head to the side; a sign that he was contemplating that fact.

"It's very interesting how you two can have separate conversations within other conversations." Dr. Paisley interjected as he looked at them as if they were a new species of animal he had just discovered.

"Excuse me? Marissa asked. "What?"

"Just now. What you two did. Fascinating. It was like you didn't even know I was in the room."

"A fact which we both would have appreciated." Ranger deadpanned.

Marissa bit down on her lips to keep from laughing. Man, some days Carlos was extra funny.

Dr. Paisley however wasn't enjoying Ranger's humor. "I know you think these sessions are a waste of your time Carlos. But I can assure you that what we do in here is very vital and effective for you to perform to the best of your ability when you're out on operations."

"I always perform my best on my assignments doctor. My record speaks for itself." Ranger growled menacingly.

Dr. Paisley visibly swallowed hard.

Poor man, Marissa thought. Fearing for his life while trying to do his job. That couldn't have felt good.

"Your record does speak for itself Carlos." Dr. Paisley agreed. "But think about these sessions as maintenance for your psyche. Better to deal with the issues now before they spin out of control."

"I don't have any issues." Ranger said glaring at the doctor.

Marissa pressed her lips together and shot Ranger an uncomfortable look. The expression wasn't lost on Dr. Paisley.

"Agent...Marissa you seem to not be in agreement with Carlos."

"What? No, no, no. I'm in agreement. Sort of." Marissa explained hurriedly, obviously uncomfortable with the doctor calling her out.

"What do you mean by sort of?" Dr. Paisley asked with a great amount of interest.

Ranger looked very interested too, but in more of a I-can't-believe-you-just-said-that kind of way. "Yes Mari, what exactly did you mean by sort of?"

Uh oh.

Marissa clasped her hands nervously in front of her. "Nothing. I meant nothing."

Dr. Paisley sensed that there was something she wanted to get off her mind. "Marissa, you know that in here the rules are that there are no secrets. What is said in here, stays in here."

"I don't believe that. What if you were kidnapped and tortured? Carlos has a lot of enemies who would love to get their hands on information regarding him. Would you break Dr.P? Would you sell out Carlos in order to save your life?"

Dr. Paisley paled a little but he wasn't going to lose focus when it came to these two. They were his most challenging patients. Their mental block and emotional detachment made his job twice as hard. Even when he did one-on-one sessions with either one of them it seemed as though he had to ask more questions, give more scenarios, even use deceptive methods in order to get them to open up and express their emotions. Carlos was the scarier of the two, but Marissa was no shrinking violet either. Their bosses at the Department of Justice were concern about their mental stability due to occurrences while out on the field that had happened with them. Agent Carter had been getting injured frequently while out on routine assignments, while Sergeant Mañoso was instigating high-risk invasion maneuvers during extraction operations in Iraq and Afghanistan. To their superiors it seemed like they had a death wish. And having been sued by families in the past, the Department wasn't going to take chances on risking another civil suit regarding a wrongful death case because of mentally unstable operatives. Now here they were sitting close, but barely touching ; one glaring at him, the other looking a little too anxious. But he was good at his job, no scratch that. He was great at his job. He was one of the most sought after psychologists in the country and he was determined to break down the barriers and get them to accept their emotional sides. How he was going to achieve that, he wasn't quite sure yet. These two were a constant surprise. But he could also be surprising.

"We're not here to discuss me Marissa." he said pointedly. "As I was saying we're going to do an interactive session that is going to involve a public outing."

"Public outing?" Marissa asked, a heavy sense of doubt lacing her voice.

Ranger's blank mask was firmly in place.

"I want you two to go somewhere public and try to engage in some sort of social activity that the general public would deem as entertaining." Dr. Paisley continued.

Marissa was intrigued by this idea. "You want us to go together?"

The doctor nodded.

"Not going to happen." Ranger said vehemently.

"Haven't you ever wanted to be normal?" Marissa asked him.

Ranger swore it was a trick question, so he remained quiet.

She took his silence as consent to continue talking. "Okay, I realize that normal for you and me is a big stretch, but that doesn't mean that we can't do a variation of normal like the rest of society."

He frowned at her. "I don't like where this seems to be heading."

Marissa knew she was asking him to go out of his comfort zone, but she was determined to see this exercise through. "How about if we start off small? Like say going to a movie."

"A movie?"

"Yeah, at one of those multiplex things." she said excitedly.

"You're kidding right?" Ranger growled.

"Why?"

"Mari, do you know the logistics of securing a perimeter as dark and as wide as a movie theater?"

"No. But I presume I don't have to since I'll be going there to watch a movie not take down a group of terrorists."

"Not a good idea." Ranger said vehemently.

"Why not?"

"Look, I know a guy that can send a copy of any movie you want to see to Rangeman. We can watch it in the Visual Conference Room and..."

"No!"

Her outburst was unexpected.

"Have you been listening to anything I just said? Fun. Like normal people. Normal being the operative word here. I want to eat popcorn from a huge paper bucket, and drink a belly-busting plastic cup of soda, and...and I want to sit amongst the general public and look up at the big screen and laugh, or cry, or cringe along with everyone else. And if you're not going to come along then fine. FINE! I can go by myself."

Ranger stared at her as though she'd grown two heads. What the hell had gotten into her? Since when did she want to do things in public, or even with the public? Unbeknownst to most people Mari was a homebody. When she wasn't working she liked to lock herself in her house and cook, or do laundry, watch tv and catch up on her reading. She said it made her feel human rather than a public servant waddling through the sewage of life filled with murder, drugs, dirty money and grimy assholes. Why the change all of a sudden?

Dr. Paisley watched on in fascination. He couldn't have planned this better himself. He knew that Carlos had a soft spot when it came to Agent Carter. His body language was a bit more relaxed when he was around her, and his attributes as a protector were fiercely focused on the special agent even though he knew she could take care of herself in most situations. He stayed silent, letting the couple work through the obvious bump in their friendship. He was anxious to see what resolution they would come up with. Their personalities were complex, with levels he was only just beginning to understand.

Marissa's face had taken on a stony appearance, and she stared straight ahead while holding her body stiffly. She couldn't believe Carlos was being so obstinate about this. It was just a stupid movie. Why was he making such a big deal out of it? But whether or not he would go with her was beside the point now, because she was determined to see this through. She wanted to do something that was fun. She needed to have fun. She didn't know when her life had taken on such a mundane and grim aura, but she was beginning to get tired of it.

Now that she was here in Trenton she had more free time on her hands. Things were much slower here. At first she had been uncomfortable with having so much time with herself and had spent many weekends in the Newark's field office Evidence Room just going through random case files to pass the time. It took her mind of the disastrous state of her social life, and her uncomfortable and thought-provoking feelings regarding Joe Morelli. For the past couple of months since she relocated to Trenton she had seen him approximately five times. Thank God it was all in public places like the supermarket, the gas station, the police station, at the mall and once at the gun range. Three out of those five times she had managed to leave without him noticing her, but the other two times had been nerve-wracking and awkward. Their conversations had been brief, and the strained politeness between them had her wondering if the intimate time they'd spent together had been a result of her imagination. More times than she would admit to she had lain in bed running the memory vividly in her mind of the feel of his hands and mouth on her body those many months ago. And when the memories became too frustrating her Stud 300 vibrator usually ended up taking the edge off. But lately she had been feeling unsatisfied, and she knew that in order to squelch that feeling a social orgasm was in order.

Marissa knew that Carlos would've volunteered his sexual services if she had asked him because all she needed was a release and then sleep. Carlos was good at that. No talking, cuddling or intimate morning-after gestures. Simple and uncomplicated, right?

But if it was, then why was she feeling so depressed and anxious? It was as if there was a huge imaginary hole within her that couldn't be filled by anything. Not by drinking, not by work and certainly not by sex. She knew something was missing, but she didn't know what it was. Maybe she was just homesick for New York. She loved the city. That was home for her. But she wasn't going home for another four months and sixteen days so she would just have to pull up her big girl panties and stick it out.

"Mari?" Ranger's voice broke through her thoughts.

She turned and leveled a cool stare at him. "What?"

"We'll go to the movies."

Really?

"You're not just saying that because Dr. P is here?" Hope flared within her but she kept her emotions off her face.

He shook his head. "No. We'll go."

That had been too easy. "But?" This was Carlos. There was always a but.

"I have to put some things in place first?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Things?"

He nodded. "For this to happen we have to compromise."

"We're going to a movie. Not Iran." she pointed out curtly. Marissa turned towards Dr. Paisley. "Can you explain to him the irrationality of his proposal?"

Dr. Paisley shrugged. " Marissa it's very clear that in order for Carlos to engage in the proposed activity he has to have some level of comfort in order for him to fully commit himself."

Marissa rolled her eyes. "Okay, you do know that it's just a movie we're going to, right?"

"It's a fun social event to you, but to Carlos it's an environment that's out of his control."

"Can't you give him some drugs to paralyze him until the movie's over?" Marissa asked.

"Agent Carter that's not a very rational solution and would totally defeat the purpose of the exercise."

"And just what exactly is the purpose of the exercise?" Ranger asked clearly not receptive to the idea of him going any place he hasn't staked out before hand.

"To prove that you're paranoid." Marissa quipped. "Not to mention a control freak. Oh, Dr. P tell him he has to eat popcorn and drink soda too. Let's corrupt the temple while we're at it."

Marissa was clearly enjoying this.

"Agent Carter..."

"Marissa." she corrected.

"Marissa, the goal here is to get Carlos to immerse himself into an environment where his focus is going to be on being entertained and hopefully not on being the protector."

"That's a lot of hope there." Marissa muttered. Ranger shot her a sharp look.

"Why do you say that?" Dr. Paisley asked.

She spared a glance at Carlos before answering. "Because we all know how paranoid Carlos is. Putting him in such an environment would only serve to alienate and terrify the people around him. Well not me. But you know, the general public."

"And this is why we're doing this exercise. Carlos has to train himself to not react and be suspicious of everyone he's around when thrust into social situations."

They shot him identical dubious stares. God, he had his work cut out for him. "Okay, let me put it like this way, until I see some sort of emotional growth happening for both of you I'm reluctant to approve any field duty for either of you."

"You can't do that!" Marissa exploded.

Dr. Paisley was determined. "I can and I will if I have to. My approval is needed on your reinstatement forms."

"We can forge your signature. That squiggly P thing you write can easily be duplicated." Marissa said with a bravado.

"Yes it can, which is why your approval forms have to be signed with a special code."

A look of disbelief settled on their faces.

Not so tough now are you guys? Dr. Paisley thought gleefully to himself. "Look guys, it won't be so bad. It's a night of fun and relaxation."

"I don't know Dr. P. It's Carlos you're talking about here. I don't think he's used those words since he was like five."

"I know how to have fun and relax." Ranger argued.

Laughter bubbled out of Marissa and she rolled her eyes. "Yes, but we're going to the movies not the gun range."

"Speaking of which," Dr. Paisley interjected. "You're not allowed to carry any weapons on this assignment."

Silence filled the room and two pairs of eyes went wide in confusion. Marissa was the first to recover. "I'm sorry Dr. P, but did you just say that we can't take our guns with us?"

He nodded as a smug look masked itself on his face. "Yes I did. No weapons of any kind."

Before she could respond Ranger flew off the couch and lunged towards the doctor. "Okay asshole, who are you working for!" Ranger shouted as he yanked Dr. Paisley out of his chair and threw him up against a wall.

Oh shit! Marissa thought as her anxiety propelled her off the couch and she moved quickly to place herself between Ranger and the now panicked doctor.

Dr. Paisley was red in the face, and was having trouble breathing as Ranger's elbow pressed heavily into his windpipe. "Answer the question!"

"No one." Paisley managed in a strangled voice. "I swear no one."

"Carlos you're going to kill him!" Marissa yelled as she tried to pry his forearm away; which was like trying to uproot a redwood tree. "CARLOS! GET OFF OF HIM!"

This time Ranger released the pressure on his forearm and stepped away from the panting, red-faced man.

"Are you alright?" Marissa asked as she guided the doctor to a nearby chair.

"I'll live." he gasped as he rubbed his throat and fell heavily into the chair.

"Carlos just got a little bit carried away with the whole no weapons business. That's like asking him to walk around naked in public."

"I realize." Paisley gasped as he watched Ranger pace the room like a caged animal.

"You shouldn't have told him that." Marissa chastised. "Is this incident going to show up in a report of some kind?"

"No. This was as much my fault. I should've explained the situation better."

"You know what? Screw you and the Defense Department!" Ranger snarled from across the room. "I'm not going to do it!"

"Look, I'll be with you. We can do this." Marissa tried to reason as she hurried over to him. Deep down however she wasn't so sure. And from the look on Ranger's face neither was he.