It's not always like this. It's not always this hard. It's not always this confusing and frustrating. It's not always like this. I swear it's not always like this. She just came out of nowhere. Oh my god I didn't even see her! One second she wasn't there and the next she was right in front of me. I didn't mean to. I didn't have time to take a breath. Bam, she was right there in front of me. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to make it okay. I don't know how to make it stop. I don't know how to fix it. Fix her. Fix me… It's not always like this. I'm sorry.
"I don't need your help!" Embarrassment was written all over my face. "Just back off." I turned quickly on my heels so he wouldn't see the tears forming in my eyes. My heart was racing; I could hear the smallest of sounds around me as I ran as fast as I could. I fumbled to get my keys out of my pocket; dropping them before I could put the key in the door. My eyes stung as the tears finally began to fall. "Shit." I picked them up, hands trembling. Unlocking my car, I got in and started the engine before Jesse could catch up. I pulled out of the gravel pit and turned right onto the road. Driving until the turn off was long behind me, I pulling over abruptly on the side of the road. My face felt red hot, my body trembling and my lungs felt like someone was twisting a white hot knife through them. The harder I tried to breathe the less air my lungs felt like they were receiving. My knuckles looked as if they were going to burst out of my skin from gripping the steering wheel so hard but that same wheel was the center of my universe at that moment. Everything else was spinning and melting around me, it almost felt as if I was caught in an out of control dream. The wheel being the only anchoring thought that reminded me that this was a living nightmare that wouldn't end by the simplicity of the sun rising in the morning. If only this were a dream, I could use lucidity to control everything. I could just change it if I didn't like it. My stomach started to twist and knot like it does in the moment you realize you took one too many shots. I clenched my eyes shut as I threw my hand to the door latch and shoved the it open. Stumbling out onto the edge of the road I could feel the sharp shards of gravel cut tiny little slits in my hands as everything and nothing all came up my throat at once. When my body was as empty as my heart felt I fell into the cold grass, feeling the night dew seep through my dark blue t-shirt. I could hear running water in the distance, crickets and the slow dinging of my car alerting me that my door was open. I laid there for minutes, maybe even hours. Time was completely irrelevant. Time wasn't real. I laid on my side and let my eyes fall where they may. Unable to form a conscious thought other than that this is how I was going to die. For some unknown reason I was content with that, I was content with just closing my eyes and going to sleep forever.
"Beca stop running!" I heard a voice from somewhere but all around me was dark and my legs wouldn't stop propelling me forward. A nervous feeling swarmed in my gut at the sound of the name I left behind so long ago. "Becs, please I can help you." I heard the ticking of a watch and realized I could do this. I could stop running, as soon as I did I could see trees in front of me. I could feel the cool night breeze and smell the pine trees. I walked slowly to the nearest tree, reached out and felt its old exposed bark. A smile fell upon my face. "Beca?" A bright eyed girl stepped out from behind a tree, slowly approaching me. I stood very still debating on whether or not I should hold my breath. "Beca, let me help you." Her bright blue eyes felt like they were piercing through every wall I had ever built within myself. She gently offered her hand out to mine. I looked through the branches to the starlit sky before letting my eyes fall back on her brilliant face. I reached my hand out to take hers, hesitating just inches away.
I threw my arms out realizing I was still lying next to my car on the side of the road, my breathing normal again. I stood and looked around, shivering in the night air. I glanced up remembering the stars in my dream. Stepping into my car I started the engine and drove slowly up the road. My eyes swollen and my throat sore from crying I tried to focus on nothing but the lines on the road before me. Not fully sure that I knew where I was, I followed my instincts. I glanced down at my phone, "Hey kid, heard you're having a rough night. Why don't you stop by here for a bit? I'm sure the crew and I can think of some way to make you feel a little better. -J" I glanced at the clock to see that it was only midnight, so when his road magically came up on the right I turned. Parking my car behind his old blazer I stopped to take a few sharp breaths before walking up the sidewalk into the music and laughter filled house. I didn't hesitate at the door I let myself in and pushed my way through the crowd of people to the kitchen where I knew the crew would be posted up.
"Aww, look who finally made it!" Jared jumped off the counter to give me a bear hug. "And covered in grass?" He questioned with curiosity in his voice. I shook my head and started laughing when I realized how stupid the story was. "There's that pretty smile, my dear sister. Want a drink? A bowl? Hard drugs? We've got it all." He nudged me with an elbow.
"Just a drink." I paused thinking for a moment. "Why don't you have a momentary lapse in judgement and let your hand fall a little heavy for me?" I looked up at my giant younger brother, appreciating what a kind young man he'd become. He winked and wandered off to the other side of the kitchen. I turned to his friend Travis and hugged him. "How have you been?" He went on and on about school and work. Talked about his daughter and how he feels lost while she's out of state visiting her grandmother. His eyes glistening brighter than I'd ever seen before. A smile twists up onto my face as I enjoy the simplicity of his company for a moment before Jared returns. Handing me a red solo cup I whisper a thank you before sliding up onto the counter. "So who are all these people?"
With a slow shrug my brother laughs, the sound echoing around the kitchen like music. "Some of them I know from work, some are friends from schools, others I met at the bar or were a guest's plus one. Why see anything you like?" He nudges me again before pointing out a few girls that were in the surrounding area. I just shake my head flashing back to where I was just hours before.
"Hey, are there still any of my clothes in the spare bedroom?" He thought for a moment.
"We don't have a spare bedroom." He raised an eyebrow before continuing, "If you mean your bedroom? Then yes." I laughed harder than I should have. "Becs, I missed you."
"I don't go by that name anymore brother." The hair on the back of my neck stood up. With the combination of the alcohol I drank before my roadside incident and the strength of this drink my head felt a lot lighter than it should have as I slowly walked out of the kitchen and down the hall, took a right and stopped to pull the hidden ladder down from the ceiling so I could go into the old loft I spent so many months living in. I gripped the cup between my teeth and unsteadily made my way into the dark room, stumbling around in the dark I tripped over something and smacked my head on the wall. "Ouch, fuck that hurt!" My voice angrily echoing around the room. I found the light switch and stood in shock for a moment. My heart beat slow but heavy against my ribcage. I sat down at the old dark oak desk, running my hands over the smooth wood. Everything was just how I left it. The only noticeable difference I could see was that my bedding had been changed and my clothes had been hung up. I lifted up the old handmade leather journal that I had been given years and years ago as a peace offering. I'd spent months and months filling it with drawings, feelings and words. Setting it back down I set my cup on the edge of the desk and walked to the area where all my clothes were hanging. I reached out and grabbed a plain long sleeve thermal, slipping off the still damp shirt I was wearing and dropped it on the floor. A sharp pain shooting through my shoulder, I pulled my tank top off and slipped off my jeans. Standing there in my black lingerie, I stretched my arm forward and then out to the side before grimacing in pain. "Shit." Pushing on my shoulder and lower neck I could feel the swelling, tenderness making me flinch at the pressure of my own hand on my flesh. I closed my eyes as thoughts rushed into my mind. Letting my voice carry the lyrics from "Titanium" from my chest.
"Why can't you just stop? Why can't you just quit?" Anger filled my veins as if I were being accused of something I didn't do. I hated it when someone told me that I had a problem, I don't have a problem. I just enjoy drinking. "You're an alcoholic Skylar." I clinched my teeth almost as tight as my knuckles before silently shaking my head. I turned to walk away, to run away, I just wanted to escape. I turned sharply and reached for the half empty bottle sitting on my desk. "Skylar stop!" Her hand wrapped around my wrist, the warmth burning my skin. "Let me help you, please." Her voice was like throwing gasoline on the fire ragging inside my chest. I took a long pull off the bottle before cringing at the harsh taste in the back of my throat. Anger bubbling inside me like a geyser, I threw the bottle in a mess of broken glass and alcohol at the wall. Tears stung my eyes, but I wasn't a pussy. I didn't cry, it's not something Beca Skylar Mitchell ever did. "You're lost and hurting Sky."
"Do not tell me what I am feeling. I don't need you. I don't need your help or your pity. I'm here like this because of you." As soon as the words left my mouth I knew they were much sharper than I had intended them to be, I was just so pissed off. I was so tired of everyone looking down on me. Just because I drank sometimes doesn't make me some horrible monster. I risked taking a glance at the girl in my room. Pain was carved into the lines of her broken expression, sadness echoed in her brown eyes. "Please just go, you're wasting your time."
"I'm not leaving." Her words struck a nerve. I turned quickly and picked up the desk chair, smashing it against the wall. "Fuck you. No one is ever going to love you like this." I watched my best friend storm down the steps that extended from the loft floor to the hallway. My breathing became labored as the floor felt like it was rocking. There were way too many thoughts spinning through my head, feelings tearing through my chest. Looking around I saw my face smiling beside so many other faces in old pictures. Pictures from middle school, soccer, football games, camping trips and music festivals. My eyes stopped on a picture that should have come off the wall a long time ago but I never really found the strength to take it down. I slammed my fists into the wall, tearing down all the pictures and letters. Smashing them into a pile on the ground. When I got to a picture of the brunette with green eyes I stopped, carefully taking it off the wall. My thumb gently ran over her face, so bright and full of life. Her nose squished a little with a giant heart melting smile on her face as I was smashing my lips into one cheek and pushing hard on the other side of her face with my hand so she couldn't escape. My stomach lurched and I could feel how uneasily the alcohol rested in the deepest pit of whoever I was. I stumbled sideways leaning into the wall for support. My legs gave way and for the first time in months I sat on the floor with my knees pulled to my chest. My lungs gasping for oxygen and tears fell so hard I thought I was going to flood my house.
"Come on Skyler, get your shit together." I muttered to myself softly before reaching up to wipe the moister from my cheeks. I tilted my head back, opening my eyes to stare silently at the ceiling. I let my head drop to the full length mirror in front of me. "Holy shit!" I spun around faster than I thought was even possible. "I-I-I uh- Umm." I fell silent because I wasn't exactly sure what to say.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry! I uhh- I- I saw the light on and I got curious! I didn't- umm, realize someone was up here." She glanced me over for a moment before spinning around in an attempt to make me feel less exposed. "I'm so sorry!" She reached up and gripped the back of her neck. Then quickly she pointed to the open steps and added, "I'm just going to leave."
"Wait! Its's okay." I sighed, knowing fully well that my face was as bright as her long curly red hair. "Umm, where have I seen you before?" I pulled a pair of pants off a hanger sharply and slipped them over my pale short legs. I yanked my long sleeve on so quickly it caused a painful shooting feeling to go through my shoulder and arm, trying to wince I glanced at the red head. Taking in the image of her very fit body. Pushing down semi inappropriate thoughts as they persistently invaded my intoxicated mind. "Okay, you can turn around. I'm not naked anymore." I heard her laugh softly before she turned around slowly. Her eyes made my breathing hitch for a moment.
"I'm Chloe. Chloe Beale." Her smile made my stomach do a weird thing that I hadn't felt in years. "I'm sorry for like totes making that an awkward situation. I just saw the light on and heard you singing. My curiosity got the best of me." Her eyes traveled down my body and shot back to my face, which now was stamped with a knowing smirk.
"Curiosity killed the cat." I shot back quickly, chuckling slightly.
"Satisfaction brought her back." Her response smooth and calm. Her soft smile making me blush, unsure if she was flirting or just being friendly. I rubbed the back of my neck nervously before reaching for my cup. "Is this uh- your room?" She raised an eyebrow looking at the blank walls, the book shelves covered in journals and black and white furniture. It was a simple question even though it unraveled my nerves a little.
"It was. I guess. A couple years ago when I first moved here. Jared's my brother." I nodded my head in an awkward bob before sipping my drink. "I live in an apartment closer to the work now. Needed my own space I guess. Jared's always telling me I can come back; this is the first time I've been up here in almost two years." I looked around slowly, debating on whether or not I should pick up the journals sometime.
"What's in the journals?" Chloe asked as if reading my mind. My body stiffened. I dropped my eyes to the floor to avoid her overwhelming blue eyes. My palms felt clammy.
"Lyrics, songs and poems." I paused daring to glance at her. "Lame stuff I guess." She shook her head and laughed. Locking eyes with me.
"No! That's awesome. There's got to be at least 60 journals here!" She was amazed, which made me curious. Her eyes sparkled with excitement and that sparked something inside me that confused me. She stepped closer.
"I swear I know you from somewhere." My voice was low. "Like dude, I swear I know you. Like really know you from somewhere." Chloe tilted her head slightly before raising an eyebrow. "I need a refill." I said staring longingly at the redhead before looking down at my empty cup. Shifting awkwardly, I smiled at the redhead in front of me. "Want anything?" I asked politely.
"Yeah, I'll come with you." She said before turning around towards the steps. I couldn't help but watch as she walked in front of me.
"Watch the second step, it's a little wobbly. I keep forgetting to fix it." She glanced back with a soft smirk on her brilliant face. I followed her down the hall and into the kitchen. "What can I get you to drink pretty lady?" She mumbled something about having whatever I was having. I laughed before turning to the freezer and digging around. "Hey Jared where is the good stuff at?" I shouted over my shoulder at my brother. I was sure he didn't hear me so I dug around a little bit before remembering we always kept it on the bottom shelf behind the frozen peas. "Yes, he's always been a creature of habit." I heard Chloe laugh softly behind me. I could feel her standing extremely close behind me.
"Why behind the peas?" She asked as I turned to face her.
"No one likes frozen produce." I set the whiskey down on the counter. "Serve the other stuff and drink the good stuff for yourself." She nodded softly as if she were taking a mental note. I added ice to the cups on the counter in front of me and poured our drinks, I started to pour her beverage lighter than mine.
"I said whatever you are having don't hold out on me." She paused for a moment like she was in deep thought. "I never caught your name?" She leaned against the counter to staring intently at my face. I blushed nervously.
"Oh yeah I'm-" I began to say before my brother slammed three shot glasses on the counter.
"She's Beca Skylar Mitchell. Don't you dare forget it." He grinned ear to ear. "Pour us a round Ms. Mitchell." He turned to Chloe taking a quick inventory of the tall redhead before elbowing me sharply in the ribs. "Well who is the gorgeous being?" He asked teasingly.
"Oh hello, I'm Chloe Beale." She said sweetly, extending her hand as a polite greeting. Jared took her hand swiftly, raising it quickly to kiss her knuckles. I noticed the quick look of caution he shot at Chloe.
"The pleasure is all mine madam. I'm Jared Russell Mitchell." Chloe laughed shyly. I shot him a warning look. "Oh I should inform you that she goes by Skylar." He dropped Chloe's hand and replaced it with a shot glass. "To lovely people and great company." He raised his glass high in the air, the guests around us raised their glasses in agreement. "And keeping promises." He added quickly. I looked at Chloe shaking my head in amusement. She shrugged innocently and raised a glass. We tossed back the shot, before we had time to recover from the burn in the back of our throats Jared handed us another shot. We threw that one back really quick before I handed her the drink I had poured and replaced the bottle in the respected spot it belonged. I grabbed Chloe by the elbow and steered her away from the guys that were checking her out with a hungry look in their eyes. We walked outside and stood on the porch. Sipping our drinks in silence, my head spinning from the alcohol I was still trying to connect where I'd seen her before. I swear I knew this woman.
"So Beca. I- I mean Skylar. Tell me about yourself." I shrugged as a chill went down my spine. I ran my hand through my hair absent mindedly. "Come on humor me." She bumped into me playfully.
"I was born in California. Grew up in Seattle." I took a sip of my drink. "I'm a libra. My favorite colors are black and white."
"Those aren't colors!" She laughed quietly. I glared at her. "I'm sorry, please go on." She smiled into her cup. I'm not sure if it was the alcohol or what but damn she was beautiful.
"There's not much to say. Umm- I played soccer growing up. Most the time I was holed up at home writing or playing guitar." I took a long drink trying to swallow the memories of what felt like a different lifetime.
"Well you obviously sing." She said with a glint of something I couldn't pin point in her eyes. Admiration maybe? I shook my head violently.
"No I don't!" I exclaimed. "Not really." She leaned into me, I could feel her body heat radiating. "How's your drink, need a refill yet?" She nodded slowly and linked arms with me as I turned towards the door. My body warming at her touch. We walked a little unsteady into the kitchen where I poured us another drink. Each drink progressively getting stronger. I tried to tug her away from the counter as I locked eyes with my brother knowing he was going to pour another round of shots. I turned bumping into someone. "Shit dude, seriously watch where you're going." Anger flaring through me at the almost spilled drink in my hand. I glanced up in shock when I realized it was my older sister Alex. "Holy shit! I wasn't expecting you." She engulfed me in one of her famous hugs, I held my cup up in hopes of not spilling on either of us. "How have you been?" She smiled slyly before planting a fat kiss on my cheek. I glanced at Chloe who was staring in confusion.
"I'm great! How are you? How's work? How's the apartment? I thought you had plans tonight? I was going to surprise you tomorrow after work. Have you been writing? Any new mixes?" My sister rambling on and on, I was still looking at Chloe who seemed to shrink away from the scene. Alex followed my gaze. "Oh. Sorry was I interrupting? I'm Sky's sister Alex." Chloe's expression changed to anxiety. Alex reached out and hugged the tall redhead. Who seemed to be speechless. "And you are?" Chloe opened her mouth to respond and closed it.
"This is Chloe." I said loudly over the guys shouting at the beer pong table. Chloe shot me a look that said graditude. Chloe started some small talk as she noticed Jared pouring another round of shots.
"Look, now all we are missing is Megan." He said before turning around.
"You spoke too soon brother dearest." A voice shouted from the doorway, we all turned to see Megan walking in with two guys on her tail. A huge smile crossed my face. "Baby sister, you just get even more gorgeous every time I see you." She threw her arms around Alex and I, I reached sideways for my brother. "We're all here now." She said stepping back. Jared passed out shots. I handed one to Chloe and pulled her into the circle in fear she would disappear. I let my hand rest on the small of her back until she glanced at me. I blushed when I realized why she was looking at me and dropped my hand. A look of sadness overtook Megan's face as she looked at her siblings. She slowly raised her shot, "To Buba." We all nodded solemnly. Before repeating her and drinking the alcohol in our hands. "He'd be proud of all of us." Alex smiled in agreement. I scratched the back of my head uncomfortably as I felt Chloe's eyes searching my face for something. One of the guys walked up behind Megan and wrapped his arms around her waist. The other stepped next to Alex and took her hand. "Skylar, Jared this is Ryan. And that's Brad." We said hellos and I turned to Chloe. She smiled reassuringly. "Who is this?"
"This is Chloe Beale." I offered.
"Like the Chloe Beale?" Megan asked flashing one of her best smiles. "The girl who single handedly saved the a Capella program at Barden?" Chloe blushed and nodded. "Girl you know you're like a legend right?" Chloe's blush deepened.
"Oh it's not that big of a deal and I totes had help from an amazing group of women." She stated humbly. I stared wide eyed. She looked more uncomfortable than ever.
"No if it wasn't for you however many years ago there wouldn't be any programs like that left in this town." Megan was beaming with excitement. She noticed Chloe's quietness and composed herself. "It's great to meet you."
"Likewise." Chloe responded avoiding eye contact.
"Hey we'll be right back." I was hoping to pull Chloe from the moment because I could see it was a little overwhelming for her. I grabbed her hand and pulled her back towards the loft. We ascended the steps before I realized there were two people making out. "Dude go find somewhere else, this room is off limits." They scurried away quickly as I took a seat at the desk. Chloe sat on the queen sized bed. "I'm sorry about that." Chloe looked at the journal on the desk. I was well passed drunk at that point and I felt like gravity was pulling me towards her. I picked it up and opened it while slowly walking to the bed and sitting next to her. I flipped through the pages. Before stopping on a messily scripted page.
"Will you let me see some of it?" She asked softly. I hesitated while I ran my fingers over the words on the old pages. I handed her the book before laying back on the bed. Her voice was soft as she read the words that once made my bones ache. I closed my eyes letting it take me back.
"The sun sets on those of us with empty hearts. Words hanging in the crisp air. Silence echoing in the sky. I can't seem to stay in one place. I'm searching. I'm searching. Always looking. Always looking for you. I hope that I'll find you in the trees. Where the moss grows on the scarred edges of the bark. I've grown tired so I'll lie my head down. But even in my dreams I'm searching. Always looking. Always looking for you."
I sighed softly. Clinching my eyes closed tight. Chloe sat in silence for a moment before I could feel her gaze on my face. I opened one eye to look at her. "What?" I sat up suddenly super self-conscious.
"You wrote that?" She asked with a sweet smile twisting up on her face. I nodded before taking the book from her hand and putting it on the pillow. "Wow." She laid back crossing her hands on her chest. I laid down next to her, enjoying her in silence. I turned my head to see her facing me. My eyes falling to her lips. I sat up abruptly. I stood and walked across the room, pushing on a couple boards on the wall behind my clothes. I removed a board and pulled out a bottle. Lifting it up like a trophy. I removed the cap and took a long pull before grimacing and handing it to Chloe. She took a drink and handed back the bottle. I took another drink.
"Can I ask you something?" She nodded before removing the bottle from my hand and taking a drink. "What are you thinking about?" We passed the bottle two more times in silence before we both laid back on the bed.
"Walking in on you singing earlier." Her eyes locked on the ceiling, I tried to wash the lump in my throat down with the alcohol. She took the bottle from my hand and took a huge drink. "Kissing you." I turned towards her. She set the bottle on the ground before rolling onto her side. I reached out and tucked a long red curl behind her ear. "How hard it is to read your emotions." She added. I pulled my hand back and looked back at the ceiling. "What are you thinking?" I tried to think about it for a moment but was distracted by the fog the alcohol was creating. I sat up, alcohol hitting me full force. I stood quickly, her mimicking my movement. I turned around to say something, her face just inches from mine. I knew I should pull away but the electricity pulsing through me wouldn't let me. I hadn't felt anything this exciting in a long time. I hadn't felt anything in a long time. Her hand rested lightly on my hip, sending chills through my entire body. I connected our lips. Parting my mouth slightly to let her tongue slip into my mouth. The kiss hot and passionate. I gently pushed her back onto the bed. Slowly leaning over her body, pulling her long smooth leg up, running my hand up her thigh. Our mouths still pressed hard against each other. Her hands burned the bare skin on my back. I pushed her higher up on the bed before straddling her. My thoughts were solely on the way my body felt so alive with her hands twisting into my hair. I tugged her shirt over her head, placing my mouth on the nape of her neck. Biting softly on her collar bone. A soft moan escaping from her chest. She tore my shirt off, throwing it across the room. Her hands roaming my back. I pulled back. Chloe bit her bottom lip, eyes locked on my mouth. She reached for the clasp on my bra, I slammed her hands down above her head and held them there.
"Are you sure?" I whispered into her ear, her hips pushing up towards me she nodded quickly. I returned my mouth hungrily to the redhead's. One hand still holding her hands above her head, the other tracing softly across her beautiful skin until I reached the button her jean shorts. Unhooking it, I let go of her hands. She started to push her shorts down.
"Skylar?" I jumped off of Chloe, startled by the voice that came from behind me. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Chloe scrambled up off the bed. "Who the hell is this?" I stood up in shock, words escaping me. I looked at Chloe who was looking for her shirt. Looking back at Jesse I didn't know what to say.
"What are you doing here?" Finally came out of my mouth.
"I walk in on- wh- whatever this is and that's all you have to say to me Skylar Mitchell?!" Anger flaring in his eyes.
"I'm just going to go." Chloe whispered now fully clothed. Sadness and panic filled my chest and I felt like I was going to get sick.
"Wait Chloe! Please you don't have to go!" I stumbled drunkenly over to the redhead who was blushing and horrified.
"Yes you do." Jesse stated. Chloe glared at Jesse. Who clearly was enjoying the awkwardness in the air.
"He's right." Chloe said before rushing down the steps.
"Chloe wait!" I tried to go after her but Jesse grabbed my arm. I pulled away. "What? What do you want Jesse? I'm done. I don't want you here. I don't want you. Why can't you just get that? I don't know what you think I need from you but you're wrong." I pushed passed him. Running down the steps and around the hallway corner into the kitchen. I stopped, scanning the room for a glimpse of red hair. I made eye contact with Megan briefly. All of a sudden all too aware that I was only wearing a bra and jeans. She pointed towards the front door. I grabbed a bottle and my keys off the counter and ran out the door after her. The grass cold on my bare feet I ran to my car, dropping my keys again. I scrambled to find them and got in the car. Taking a drink as I started the engine. I pulled out of the driveway and started driving down the road looking for her along the edge. Still drinking steadily from the liquor bottle I was clutching. I pushed on the gas to make the car go faster. I couldn't let her walk home in the cold on this winding road in the dark. I took a corner a little too fast and swerved to miss the headlights coming towards me. I was blinded for a moment and all of a sudden a flash of red hair was directly in front of my car. I jerked the wheel hard and slammed on the breaks before I heard a loud thud and then connected with a tree beside the road. The air bag went off and for a moment all I could see was black. I choked on the blood filling my mouth before throwing the door open and falling to the ground with heavy impact. I laid in a pile of broken glass for a moment, feeling the glass dig into my exposed shoulders. I rolled over trying to stand up. Stumbling sideways into the side of my car. I was trying to adjust my eyes to the dark, looking around for Chloe. I heard her crying softly. I tried to run towards her but pitched forward smacking my face hard on the ground. I crawled over to her fragile body. Panic rising quickly when the amount of blood around her registered. "Chloe, oh my god. No! No! Chloe I'm so sorry!" I pulled her into my lap before realizing I needed to call for help. "Someone help! Oh god! No no no no no! Help! I need help!" I saw headlights coming from behind us. Tires squealing on the pavement. I heard a door slam.
"Skylar?! Skylar!" My sister's voice screamed from behind me. I could hear multiple people running.
"Call 911! Fuck fuck fuck. Chloe I'm so sorry!" I couldn't breathe.
"Beca?" Chloe managed to choke out. "Don't leave me." Her eyes fluttered closed.
"Chloe, no wake up please wake up." I was shaking her. Her eyes opened. Her hand sliding into mine. Colder than before. I held her as close as I could. Megan tried to pull me away. "No! I can't leave her." I tugged away from Megan frantically. Blackness creeping into my vision. I fought it as hard as I could but eventually I couldn't see anything. All I remember is clinging to Chloe's hand.
Trees surrounded me in the darkness. My chest felt heavy. I could hear someone's voice calling my name in the distance. I tried to stand up but my body hurt so bad. I wasn't sure I could move. "Beca, please." The voice was faint but I had to find it. Using a tree, I pulled myself up despite the screaming pain in my head and muscles. My mouth tasted like iron but I ignored it. I stumbled forward straining to hear the voice again. "Beca, don't leave me." The voice was closer, I pushed forward. Tripping over a fallen branch. I looked up to see Chloe laying on the cold ground. I crawled over to her. Her hand reaching for me, I reached out to grab it-
A bright light burned my eyes, I couldn't hear anything but I could feel the bed underneath me. The needles in my skin. I blink away the harsh light as my eyes adjusted. Megan stood on one side, Alex leaning over behind her. I could hear the steady beeping of a machine and I realized where I was. My thoughts still foggy as I gained my senses back. "Chloe?" I asked my voice raspy, throat burning. Megan looked at Alex for an answer. Fear evident on her face. I tried to get out of bed to look for her but the pain was blinding and the darkness overtook me again. My vision fading all I could hear was the steady beeping and Alex's voice.
"Chloe might not make it Megan." I heard the machine change tones as I let out a breath. "Someone help!" Alex screamed before the nothingness took over.