Don't own, but am obsessed. Am not profiting, accept in reviews and kind words.
Title: My Dad
Rating: PG13 for a bit of mild swering
Characters: JD/Cox friendship (JDA)
Summary: This is sort of a missing scene from the episode "My Cake". I hopes you enjoys and gives plenty of reviews.
JD looked over at his brother and realized he had passed out from the consumption of beer. It didn't surprise him. As soon as they had discussed their father Dan had started sucking down beer as though it was the last bit of water on earth. JD smirked and shook his head. At least his brother had tried.
Perry was lost in the football game, that JD had lost track of an hour ago. He finished his beer and walked to the kitchen. He chunked the old one in the trash and grabbed a fresh one out of the fridge. It wasn't an appletini, but at least it was taking the edge of. He was a bit tipsy, but it didn't drown the memory of his dad. Which, in a way, was what he was hoping for.
He'd been trying to keep his head above water, but the current was slowly pulling him down. It was starting to eat at him. JD would make cracks about crying, but in reality it was hard for him to show the dark side of his emotions. Whenever bad things happened he joked about it. He pushed it away. JD tried not to let it eat at him, but this time it was different.
His dad had left when he was a child. He had gone through a slew of step fathers, none of whom had really cared about him, and his dad only showed up when it was convenient for him. Sure he paid for things, but JD never had that male role model figure. He just had the monthly checks from his father, and the strange presents his father brought on holidays or birthdays.
JD popped the top on his new beer. He glanced at Perry who was screaming at the TV screen. Dan was snoring very loudly and his head was lolled against the back of the couch. At least he wasn't in the tub anymore. Shaking his head, JD slipped out of the apartment.
He found himself sitting on the front steps of the building. His chest was tight, and he drank the beer faster than he thought. Everything was messed up. When it came to his family everything always seemed to get screwed up. Anger swam through his veins tightening his grip on the empty bottle. He was almost grateful when he saw the full beer dangling in front of his face.
"Thought you could use this newbie."
JD nodded and took the beer. Cox took a seat next to him. After taking a swig of his own beer he looked at his young colleague.
"I'm assuming there's a reason we're out here instead of watching the rest of the game, and for your sake it better be a damn good one."
"Sorry." He shrugged. "Just needed some air I guess." He wouldn't meet his mentor's eyes in fear that Perry would see right through him.
"Look, I know you're not doing as well as you'd like everyone to believe. You're good at hiding yourself behind your silly little daydreams and middle school jokes, but the fact of the matter is I'm not good at dealing with other people's emotions, newbie. So, I really have absolutely no idea how to approach this."
"I appreciate everything you've done tonight, I really do." JD looked over at his mentor. "I thought talking about it would help. Somehow make things easier, but the more we talked about him..." He shook his head and tilted the bottle to his lips taking a deep drink.
"The more we talked about him, what, newbie?" Cox prompted him.
JD stood up and paced in front of the stoop. "I don't know. I keep trying to think about all of the good times, but there were so many more bad times that it's hard." He laughed bitterly. "And just when we were starting to reconcile our relationship he..." He found himself not being able to say it.
At that moment JD realized he hadn't said it once. Everyone else had, but the word had never come out of his mouth. He stopped pacing and tilted his head back. You couldn't see many stars in the city, but he could just make out the big dipper. Taking several deep breaths he tried to control the roller coaster of emotions that was running through him.
When he was sure his voice wouldn't waver JD said, "It just feels like he abandoned me all over again."
"You do realize that he didn't take off in a cherry red mustang convertible with a couple of floozies in hopes of going to Vegas, winning a jackpot and retiring in a pent house suite." Perry raised an eyebrow. "And while I might indulge in the thought of death as a means of escaping this awkward and annoying relationship," He took a breath and mentally yelled at himself for his choice of words. "I'm fairly certain your father would not have died if he could have helped it."
Perry watched the kid as he stared at the ground. He hated it, but his heart was actually breaking for the man standing before him. He was trying to act tough, but he had even lost most of his humorous nature.
"I think it's easier to imagine he just picked up and left again ya know?" He ran a hand through his hair. "That way I don't feel so bad about being angry with him for..."
Realization dawned on Perry. Standing up he walked over to his young friend. "He died JD."
He nodded. "I know."
Squaring his shoulders he crossed his arms over his chest. "Than say it."
JD scoffed and smirked. "Why? I know he's...gone."
"Say it."
He shook his head and went to walk around his mentor, but the bigger man stepped in his way. "What are you doing?"
"Newbie, usually I wouldn't pressure you into saying anything, but you're not getting past me until you say it." Cox sighed internally as he yet again insulted Jane. Damn it, he even did it in his head. He just couldn't stop. He really, really couldn't, but regardless he had to try and help the kid.
"I don't understand you. I thought you and Dan were doing this so you could at least attempt to be here for me," JD snapped. "But as usual Dan's passed out, wallowing in his own pain, and you're insulting me again. I mean my entire life, ever since my dad left I've been taking care of everyone around me and the one time I need a little help as usual no one's there." He slung his beer into the brick wall. It shattered littering the ground beside him. "God damnit!"
"Well gee Newbie do you feel better?" He put his free hand in his pocket, his other still holding the half drank beer. "I have to tell you though it's amazing that with all the with the multitude of words that fell out of your mouth you managed to avoid the one phrase I've asked you to say."
He held his arms out in exasperation. "Why do you want me to say it so badly? It's not going to change anything. It's not going to bring him back or fix my family. It's just words, Perry."
"Well if it's just words than you should have no problem saying it," He said nonchalantly.
"Okay, fine, you want me to say it?" JD took a step back. He didn't know why he just felt like he needed the distance. "My dad..." He swallowed thickly. When he spoke again his voice was lower, calmer. "My dad died."
JD realized in that moment that it was true and that it wasn't like when he was a kid and his dad took off. Every so often his father would come back to visit and hang out, but there was no coming back from this.
There was a hand on his shoulder and he turned his head to look up at Cox. "It's going to be okay, JD. You're going to get through this."
He nodded. "Hey, look I'm sorry for what I said before, about you not being here for me." He shoved his hands in his pockets. "I was just lashing out. You really did come through for me."
Perry took his hand away and grimaced. "Oh come on Newbie, don't go all mushy on me. I'm really trying not to call you another girls name for the rest of the night."
JD smirked. "Yeah, I'll keep that in mind."
"Come on," Perry said changing the subject. "You need another beer."
JD knew there was still a long way to go, but for the first time, in a long time he felt like he had someone there for him. No matter how much Perry acted like he didn't care for him, JD knew that if he were to fall, his mentor would never let him hit the ground.
-Fin-
This is a one shot, but I could probably play off of it. Let me know whatcha think and if it's pretty in pink as it is or if I should add some other chapters with more of our favorite duo banter and lingo.