Jaune was planted on the couch, head in his hands, panting excessively and cursing himself under each painful doubts in his mind circled back up again. The pain. The heartbreak. All these emotions formed a cacophony of sound that seemed impossible to ignore. The malicious whispers were only silenced by the sound of the door shutting, with the image of a man dressed in grey cutting through the wall of noise. Jaune looked up in alarm, but saw a familiar face in familiar clothing.
"It's Jaune, right?"
"Yeah. Jaune Arc."
The veteran Huntsman nodded and leaned against the door in a manner that seemed relaxed, but Jaune could feel a hint of unease in his every movement.
"Y'know, I came to thank you. During the battle, if you didn't find me and report the situation at the Tower, I wouldn't have been able to save my niece."
Jaune was puzzled by this revelation, but it suddenly all began to make sense. The old man. The grey shirt. The tattered cape. The roughed-up look. How could it have been anyone else?
"You're Qrow, aren't you? Ruby and Yang's uncle. You taught Ruby how to use a scythe."
The old man nodded in confirmation.
"How are they? I heard about what happened to them. Yang's arm, and... whatever Ruby did."
A frown formed over Qrow's face as he let out a loud sigh. "They'll both get through this. It's a lot to take, but they've got the willpower to get over it. They get it from their parents."
This news brought some relief to Jaune, yet it was insignificant compared to the pain he felt. He wished to be alone, to wallow in his pity. He brought his knees up to his chest, attempting to close himself off from the world. But once again, the Huntsman cut through.
"I was coming up the road here when I saw you and your teammates standing outside. You looked like you had to be coaxed out by them. Then you froze, and ran back inside like you'd just seen a ghost."
"Ghost". The word seemed to stagger Jaune. And it appeared that Qrow noticed, as Jaune saw him uncross his arms. Jaune didn't want to talk about it, or even contemplate it. However, he felt prompted to respond.
"In a way, I did see a ghost." He gulped, hoping to keep the rising tide of emotions from surfacing. "It was Ren's idea. He said we shouldn't just sit here in this temporary refuge. He wanted us to get some fresh air. He and Nora went out first, and they encouraged me to join them. I opened the door, took a step outside, and then I saw something that messed me up. A leaf. A small, red leaf. It'll sound dumb to you, but it made me want to hide away; to just shut myself off from everything." He shook his head. "You wouldn't understand." Jaune barely kept his voice in check as he said this. It felt like torture to talk about it. And strangely enough, it appeared that it had the same effect on Qrow. The Huntsman's face was drawn into a frown, his expression serious.
"I do, kid. More than you know."
A pause more uncomfortable than the entire conversation set in, as Jaune processed this startling revelation.
"Earlier, I told you that I came to thank you. But that's not the only reason. You've got two teammates standing outside. One's not here."
Jaune's heart dropped.
"I've heard things. Your teammates told me some more just now - what you told them. I know you lost the other girl. Pyrrha Nikos. She said goodbye to you, sent you off in rocket locker, then confronted an opponent she didn't stand a chance against, in the hope that she could delay her till someone stronger came along to finish her off. A brave move, but it left a hole in the team that can't be filled."
Qrow's piercing gaze fell upon Jaune, and the young man could finally see the shades of sadness and regret in his eyes, as clear as the grey in his hair.
"A brave warrior giving their life for the good fight; it sounds like something out of a fairytale, and yet it's so common among Huntsmen. A lot of teams have lost a member or two along the way. Unfortunately, my team suffered too. One teammate went solo, now only getting in touch when it suits her. Another one disappeared and was never seen again. She's been out in the wilderness too long to have survived all these years."
Jaune had noticed that Qrow's tone changed at the mention of the second teammate. Qrow had paused again, his eyes empty as his mind seemed to go on a distressing journey. After a moment that felt like ages, the old man shook himself out of this trip, emerging with a deepened frown and an even more sombre tone.
"Jaune. I... I know it's complicated between you and Pyrrha. Your friends told me how much she cared for you, and how shook up you've been since it happened. And I wanted to tell you that I've been in similar spots to where you are now. I've felt similar things: The pits in the stomach when you remember her name, or when you see something that reminds you of her; that inescapable feeling that you could've done more. That it was your fault that they died." He let out a small, bitter snigger. "After the second girl, I couldn't leave the house for weeks. I couldn't even look at my weapon."
Qrow sighed loudly, shaking his head as he did so.
"Just before I shut myself off from the world, Ruby's dad and I went looking for her. We spent every waking minute scouring the wilderness, chasing hopeless leads that took us nowhere. When the truth finally set in – that she was gone forever – I broke down. All those weeks, I kept dreaming the impossible, hoping that I could somehow discover some magical way of finding her and getting her back. I was stuck like this for far too long, and it left permanent marks."
The old man stopped. Qrow brought out a metal flask and fidgeted with it, before looking up to meet Jaune's gaze. Jaune could see a change in Qrow's expression. It was almost indescribable. Qrow's red eyes seemed to convey a sincerity that Jaune wouldn't normally associate with the weary Huntsman.
"It took a lot to drag me out of that. And take it from me: You don't want to put the people around you through that. So you need to snap out of this, for their sake as much as yours. You don't want to spend the rest of your life chasing ghosts, so you've gotta learn to accept that they're gone. Let her go, say goodbye."
Jaune had barely been able to suppress the pain, but there was no hope of it now. Several bitter tears began to well up in his eyes. He felt his heart beating fast inside his chest, compelling him to resist the temptation to give in.
"What if I can't?"
The old Huntsman looked perplexed, as Jaune wiped the tears away.
"What if I can't let her go? What if I'm not ready to say goodbye? Surely... There's a bunch of legends, stories. There's got to be something in them; some way of bringing her back. This can't be it, right?"
Qrow seemed to be taken aback by Jaune's words. After a moment, he returned his flask and shrugged.
"I don't what to tell you. You're right. There are a few tales talking about things like that; strange magic that could defy death. But that's all they are. Tales. Stories. Myths. I've seen a lot of this world, and I've never heard of any truth in them. Kid, like I said, you don't want to be chasing ghosts for the rest of your life."
Yet again, the old man's words punctured Jaune's heart, recalling some of the pain that had been silenced by the conversation. Qrow sighed once more, and a wry smile formed.
"But... Look at me. A cynical old man with greying hair and bad habits. I'm not exactly the type of person you'd be wise to take advice from. I've seen a lot of Remnant, but I haven't seen half of what this world has to offer. You never know, what you're looking for could be in some far-off place or even right in plain sight. At the end of the day, it's your choice whether you let go of this girl or you move forward, hoping that along the way you'll find something. The problem is you'll be holding on to that hope for a long time, and that will sting every day. Just consider your options."
Jaune nodded, his heart not as heavy as it was.
"Thanks, Qrow."
For a moment, it seemed like the man was incredibly touched by those words. He nodded back, and then turned towards the door. But just before he opened it, he looked over his shoulder.
"Oh and Ruby's going off an adventure. She's going to Mistral in search for clues about the woman behind all this. If you want to do some soul-searching, that isn't a bad start."
The old man winked before opening the door and making a swift exit, letting in a cold breeze. Jaune slumped back in his seat, reflecting on the conversation that just occurred. "Soul-searching". A sense of incredible determination rose within him as he contemplated this. He jumped up and paced towards the door. He opened it hastily and peered around to see his two teammates staring back at him, with expressions of worry and concern etched into their faces. Jaune opened his mouth to speak, but Nora interrupted him.
"We know about Ruby and Mistral. Qrow told us before he went in to talk to you."
"Yeah, it's going to be a tough trip."
The normally cheerful girl slanted her head inquisitively. Ren frowned before speaking up.
"Jaune, we don't have to go if you don't want to."
"No, I think we do," Jaune responded. "We have to find answers... for Pyrrha."
The two teammates smiled.
"For Pyrrha."
Just before they headed off to Ruby's place, Jaune looked down at the red leaf. The snow had been falling since dawn, partially covering the leaf with a layer of white. But despite this, Jaune couldn't ignore it. It still reminded him of her, bringing back a surge of raw emotions and the petrifying fear of saying goodbye. He memorised the leaf, then turned around and walked onto the path alongside his teammates.
"Not yet."