Hello guys :) this is my first OUAT FF ever. I've been a fan of Regina from the very beginning and the idea of writing this story just overcame me some weeks ago. I'm not sure whether you're going to like it but I certainly hope you will. Please excuse my English, I'm pretty sure I've made some mistakes. Enjoy reading it! :)

Rated M for future chapters. Swan Queen might also appear ;)

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the mere idea of the FF.

„No, wait, I'm sorry"

Regina said, tears shining in her eyes. The moment the mean words had come out her mouth, she had known that it had been the exact wrong thing to say especially as Emma had been the one to invite her. But the anger of once again being forbidden to see her son – and if people started to be honest, they would realize that Henry was just as much her son as it was Emma's – had totally blindsided her for a moment.

That's at least what she tried to tell herself because truth was that the anger she had just let out was not only a one-second-thing. The anger was something being a part of her which she seemed not to be able to control because… this is who you are, Regina's mind answered. Who she had always been.
No. Not always. But most of her life.

She closed her eyes for a second before she continued trying to save the moment.

„E-Emma, I'm sorry, snapping at you, I shouldn't have done that. Will you accept my apology?"

Although the tears were still shimmering in her eyes, it also had a certain touch of hope. Hope of forgiveness at least once. There was nothing else she wanted because forgiveness was the key to her happiness. If the others forgave her, she would be able to start a new, better life because then she could let go of the past and the anger so that it would not be a part of her any longer.

At the same time, she didn't want to beg. It made her feel defeated and ashamed. But maybe she should feel ashamed after all the horrible things she had done. Per contra she had done them to finally be happy… and still she knew that this was no real excuse. It unquestionably was an explanation but not a justification… she just liked to dismiss this from her mind.

"Okay, you're right, Archie said you're trying to change and you are."

Regina let go of the breath, she hadn't even noticed she was holding.
However in the next second the words Emma had just said began to repeat themselves and the relief she had just felt was replaced by betrayal. Betrayal of trust. He had promised her to not talk to anybody about their meetings and he was aware that it had been astonishingly difficult for her to speak up to him.

"Doctor Hopper said I was trying?"

Regina breathed and her voice had adopted a different, one might say dejected, tone. Her ears started to hear random noises and she felt a little bit dizzy. The progress she had made the past few weeks seemed so far away now that she felt like it was entirely gone. All the work she had put into this… for nothing because there was nobody she could trust.
Maybe Henry… but he had also left her, hadn't he? No, she told herself, he hadn't, I still love him, I still need him.

Emma nodded and continued sounding rather enthusiastic.

"He said you came to see him, that you're trying not to use magic, that you're trying to be a better person, you understand, I was hesitant to invite you, I asked him and he thought it was a good idea."

Regina forced herself to smile but what she really felt was far away from happiness.
First of all, Emma hadn't really wanted to invite her even though she had been the one to save her and even though Henry had wanted to invite her. This meant that there was no forgiveness, no acceptance and consequentially no good terms between them at all too. Secondly, someone had betrayed her again, used her weakness against her, just as it happened so often in her past.

The past she could never really let go.

"Thank you, it was, I should be going"

How she was able to utter these words was beyond her understanding. She didn't even wait for an answer and simply turned around walking away from the diner and from the people she loathed so much – except Henry of course.

All the faith in people finally accepting her she had had some minutes ago was vanished into thin air. They didn't accept her; they just thought that pretending to be nice to her would be the better solution. Additionally the one person besides Henry she had started to trust had misled her. It had been foolish of her to believe anything would change. And although deep down in her heart she could understand those people, it hurt anyway. It hurt her so much that she started to cry while walking down the street. The wind was cold and Regina's body started not to only shiver because of her cries but because of the low temperatures.

You're pathetic Regina, she thought. She still felt slightly dizzy and all she wanted to do was to get home and go to sleep. Yet she feared that sleep wouldn't meet her as gladly as she would receive it.

She began walking faster as her car came into her sight but before she was able to reach it, she heard some weird noises which made her turn around. Her eyes scanned her surroundings very slowly but she couldn't see anything that would be of any danger. The blackness didn't make it any easier for her to see something. Already thinking that she must have made the noises up, something hit her very hard in the back. A burning feeling crept over her spine and her lungs felt like exploding. She didn't get to turn around anymore to take a look at what might have caused the hit.

The last thing she thought was that this day couldn't get any more miserable before she fell down, darkness welcoming her.

Some meters away, Cora, Regina's mother, stood on a roof with a smile on her face. Hook who had raised one eyebrow looked at her. "And how is this supposed to help us? I mean, no offense, but you just…" Cora lifted one arm interrupting him. "She won't be able to walk anymore and she won't have any magical powers anymore. Additionally nobody will be ready to help her which means that she will need me." Hook nodded slowly but his doubts were visible. The woman really was the mother of the year.

When Regina awoke, she felt immediately that something was off. The first thing she noticed was the awkward smell which was similar to the typical hospital one.

Secondly she recognized that something was missing in her. She couldn't feel her magic. Usually she was surrounded by a certain vibration but it was gone. She felt lighter without the vibration but yet she couldn't be too happy about it missing because it meant that she was weak and helpless which made it easier for others to hurt her. And she had been hurt, obviously; otherwise her magic wouldn't be gone.

Slowly she opened her eyes and recognized that she was indeed in a hospital room. She saw the drip next to her and the monitors which observed her heartbeat.

Suddenly her last memories started coming back or better yet crashing down on her which made her realize once more that she had been attacked by something or someone. The overwhelming thoughts made her feel groggy and she closed her eyes for a moment to center herself.
Something had happened to her after she had had the little fight with Emma. She had walked down the street and – nothing.

When she opened her eyes again she saw Henry who sat in the corner of the room sleeping. Next to him sat Emma who was sleeping as well. Confused to actually see them in here, Regina tried to sit up, only to comprehend seconds later that neither her head nor her legs were willing to help her.

Regina looked down on her legs and after she had tried to move them again, the realization of them not doing what she wanted them to do hit her. Fear started to build up and she touched one of her legs. She could feel the touch but yet her muscles weren't working. Maybe she was only too worn out by whatever had happened to her - this rose the next question in her mind – what exactly had happened to her? That she had been attacked was clear but she hadn't seen anybody nor had she felt any real physical pain, had she? She went back to the moment she had been walking down the street. She had seen her car and then… then she had heard something but she hadn't seen anything. Right after it, she remembered nothing which could only mean that she had been harmed right in this moment.

Magic then, Regina thought.

But who would have the guts to hurt her? It was true that she had many enemies that would love to see her dead but the mere thought that someone would try to assassinate her was both dreadful and outraging. Not to mention the idea that she hadn't been able to defend herself in any way.

Since when had she become a walking target?
And where was her magic?
Who had the powers to take them from her?
Rumpelstilskin?
She shook her head; he didn't have any reasons to injure her, did he?

Her attention was brought to Henry when he started to stir and then woke up. A little smile crossed Regina's face as she saw her son waking up. "Good morning sunshine." she whispered in order not to wake up Emma.

Nonetheless her good will was destroyed when Henry jumped up and ran in her direction to hug her.

"I thought you wouldn't wake up anymore. The dwarfs found you last night on the street and there was just no way to wake you up and Doctor Whale didn't know what was wrong with you as well and I was just so worried."

Henry's fast words made her head spin a little bit and she caressed his head.

"I'm fine, dear, I'm fine. You have nothing to worry about."

She kissed his forehead then and hugged him back.
Although the situation could be another one, it felt good to know that Henry still cared for her. It didn't happen very often anymore. Ever since Emma Swan had arrived over a year ago things had changed rapidly.
Of course she had to admit that things between her and Henry hadn't been all too well even before Miss Swan had entered their lives but back then when she had thought that their relationship couldn't get any worse, she had proven wrong.
Regina couldn't even say that she wasn't able to understand Henry – quite the contrary - but it hurt Regina anyway to know that her little prince didn't want to be her little prince anymore.
It enraged her and most of the time she wasn't able to hold the anger back which ended in hurting others although she didn't even intentionally want it. It always was the same.

Meanwhile Emma had stood up as well and walked over to Regina.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

Regina looked up and gave her a small smile which was more than Emma deserved, she thought

"Just fine. I guess, the lack of sleep kind of knocked me out."

Regina knew just too well that Emma wouldn't buy her lie but since nobody obviously knew what happened to her, Regina would be the last one to tell what she thought had happened. They wouldn't help her anyway; they wouldn't care if something tried to kill her because deep down it was what they all wanted.
What did she feel when she thought about that part? Astonishment? Certainly not. Sadness? Definitely. Was there any way for her to change that part? No. The response came immediately. She didn't need to think about it. Not after yesterday.

A little confused why she suddenly cared so much about it, which she had also noticed when she had talked to Emma the other day, she shook her head. She hadn't cared all those years or perhaps she had? Maybe she had just never admitted it? Now was not the right time to think about it.

"Henry, why don't you get something to drink or eat, hm?"

Emma asked and Henry lifted his head. He then nodded and left the room. Regina just shook her head slightly as Henry almost didn't get the curve and then she sighed when she looked up.

The Blonde looked at her curiously and Regina scolded herself for having let her mind wander.

"So how are you really doing?"

Emma asked and Regina sighed again. Emma could be one piece of work. Just like her mother but that was an entirely different topic.

"Fine, Miss Swan, it hasn't changed in these five seconds."

Snapping at woman always helped most to scare her away, that much Regina had already learnt and since she had no intention to talk to the Blonde at all, it would be the best way.
Or was Regina wrong again? Possibly the other woman wanted to help her – no. Nobody wanted to help her; everyone always let her down at some point. It was her destiny – to be alone forever.
Henry, she thought, you're not alone. Well, partly you are because even though he seemed to be really concerned some minutes ago, it wouldn't last. She knew that.

"You don't look fine."

Emma responded much to Regina's surprise. Faked concern didn't suit Emma very well though. If she didn't mean it, it would be better if she kept her mouth shut. On the other hand, there was hardly a way to silence Emma at all.

"Well, that might be because I have spent the last weeks searching for a way to get you back and I haven't really had any time to calm down myself."

Regina gave Emma an annoyed glance.

Just as Emma wanted to reply, the door was opened again and Doctor Whale entered the room.

"Regina, I see you're finally awake. How do you feel?"

Regina could hardly help herself but managed not to roll her eyes.

"I'm fine. I just told Miss Swan that the lack of sleep must have paid its price. Can I leave the hospital now?"

She was serious. If someone had actually tried to get rid of her, her best chance would be at her home where she could prepare herself especially as she didn't have any magic anymore. The bare thought of being powerless again in a world in which others had magic made her feel very uncomfortable.
Apart from that, she also needed to find out what kind of spell had been used on her in the first place. All these things would be hardly possible to accomplish in here.
Moreover Regina hated to look weak and being in a hospital did that.

Both, Whale and Emma looked taken aback.

"Regina, you were found unconscious and you have just woken up. Don't you think it would be a better idea to take a step back and stay here for at least a day just to make sure you're really fine?"

Regina sat up and gave the Doctor a little warning smile. Her mood was sure as hell not the best and the last thing she needed right now was someone pissing her off. Having thought that – her pissed off modus had already started, so it only could get worse.

"As much as I appreciate your concern or shall I say your nicely played concern, I'm quite certain that I'll be able to handle myself."

Regina couldn't really tell whether it was her anger speaking or her fear. In the end she decided for her annoyance and partly her fear.
Despite the fact that many people liked to say that she didn't have a heart and therefore she also couldn't feel anything, including fear, it wasn't true. She felt the fear and it was eating her alive. She didn't want to die or to be weak although she kept wondering why that was since she didn't have much left. The only thing that kept her truly alive was her pride. And Henry, more or less.

Regina glanced at Doctor Whale and Emma who looked like they were overthinking their upcoming responses again and again. Well done, Regina, she thought, you gave them a reason to let you go.

"I can't force you to stay in here, but…"

"Good. Then things would be clear."

Regina put the blanket away and sat up, her legs felt better than they had some minutes before which confirmed what she had thought, her muscles had only been overworked. So the only real problem was her magic being gone. She got out of the bed and looked at Emma and Whale.

"Where are my clothes?"

Emma pointed at the chair behind her and as Regina made a few steps forward, she noticed that something was wrong though. Although she felt that her legs were indeed working and her muscles were reacting, they just didn't do what she wanted. Quite the contrary, her muscles were quivering and after she had made another step forward, her legs gave in and Regina would have fallen to the floor if Whale hadn't caught her.

Disbelievingly she stared at her legs. She didn't know what was going on but shame made its presence clear and she wished that Emma and Whale wouldn't have seen how helpless she actually was. Or – no – she wasn't helpless. She was simply incredibly tired, nothing more.

"Didn't you just say that you're fine?"

Emma said and if Regina hadn't been distracted by the shame that still lingered on, she would have snapped at her. Whale stil had his arms around her and as she tried to free herself from him and make another step, she had to realize that she couldn't. This wasn't a simple one-minute-thing, this was a serious problem.

"I guess that means that you're staying with us."

Regina looked up to Whale and sighed. This was not what she needed.

It would be awesome if you left a review for me! Pretty, pretty please! Do you think I should continue writing the story? :)