Hello, welcome to the fanfiction story in which I am creating. I'm back again to write after a long hiatus. It had been a long year but I think I got my groove back on. Hopefully I can continue my story writing once again. Enjoy the little chapter!


Chapter one

In a galaxy far far away…. Well, not too far away but still rather far from ours. In this laboratory, which spans from the core of the planet to the very reaches of space, holds more secrets then a married man in his 40's. Things from cybernetics to psychic enhancement to even the absurd is created and studied with the utmost care and precision… most of the time.

Deep within the mantle of the planet where a part of the facility is located, an experiment took place. This experiment is to test the effects of subatomic radiation onto a living test subject. This was accomplished by the use of a specially-made laser and untried substance. First it was tested on donuts, with some rather appealing results…. It created two identical donuts. Only difference is that one donut was tasty and the other was…. Not so tasty. One of the scientists volunteered to be the test subject because he always wanted a twin brother. When the beam from the laser hit the man, something went wrong. It didn't create two identical men…

A man with unique powers had been created. He has strength beyond that of a normal man. With agility that would put most Olympic athletes to shame, he is the pinnacle of health and power. The problem is: he's got the mentality of a 5 year old kid on a sugar high and is as unstable as a house of cards. This man, standing a full 5ft 7in and a ready to burst at the scene, is the entity only known as "Splosion Man." His body became a glowing, heated mass of energy with a trail of it coming off his head that could pass for his "hair." With no recollection or drive to remember his past life, he decides to do what anyone would do in his situation. Escape the lab and run freely. While a normal person or experiment is unable to escape from the laboratory, Splosion Man is far from ordinary. His one and only capability apart from his insanity is his power to explode at will. With enough energy to power Los Vegas for a year, he can unleash it in a series of "splosions". He often uses this for jumping, but it can also be used for offensive attacks as well. The only thing that keeps him from sploding constantly is his limited energy supply and things that can put a blazing fire like him out such as water or a burst of CO2. After a few moments of rest, he can effectively reignite himself and go about sploding once more. With his new found abilities and his bottomless sense of madness, he aims to leave the lab and live peacefully in a meadow near the mountains in a log cabin … and eat donuts… and drive a car… and make friends… and watch action movies.

Right after his creation, the unstable man he sought a way out of the room. The few remaining scientists within the sector who have not gotten blown up or ran away, stayed to try to contain him. This would have worked if it weren't for the fact that they had highly explosive barrels that dispense from machines nearby. These dispensers are used for convenience, not having to wait or travel the lab just to get some chemicals. This allows for anyone to use… problem is, this allows for anyone to use. So when splosion man found the button and an explosive barrel popped out, he kicked it straight into the scientist holding the force field closed which then releases the field. With his doorway to freedom, he made his way out which has caused more mayhem then the scientists thought possible despite their best efforts to stop him.

What does this have to do with a certain kung fu master? All shall be revealed.

- - - -

"Knangknangknangknangknang!" The crazy unstable experiment runs his way down the hallway with his arm in the air and his hands point forward as if he's going to catch whoever is in front of him.

For the scientists, that's what they are trying to avoid. They received the reports about this explosive entity over the speakers, emails, and memos left on the billboards. They know he is not to be approached but they also have permission to use any force necessary to stop him. One of their deathtraps, lasers, or robots can stop this crazy fiend. In theory, of course.

Splosion man jumps on top of one of the scientists and splodes off him to a nearby ledge. The explosion pushes the scientists into the walls or turns them to dust. Skidding to a halt with a skid mark being left behind, he looks down the edge of the side, seeing a rather long way down to the bottom with some barrels at the foot of it. "Ooooh, bet you can fit a whole lot of corn down there." Then he looks up, seeing that there is another ledge at the top 20 feet up. He leans over to get a better look, his toes barely keeping him on the edge.

"Best way to get to the top is at the bottom of the ladder!" He leans forward until he falls off the edge. He looks toward the readers. "Kids, don't try this at home."

He plummets down, his body limply falling until he gets near the barrels, at which he splodes at will.

This causes a chain reaction, detonating the barrels and shooting him straight up the corridor. Once he makes it near the top ledge, he grabs it and hoists himself up with a flip. He dusts himself off before jogging his way down the single pathway with a grin on his face. "I should go to Hollywood; they use tons of explosions there."

A rather short scientist with a big nose from a nearby security center is sleeping soundly in his chair. He is suppose to keep watch of any suspicious activities and deploy the robots if a threat is seen coming. He would have kept sleeping if the alarm did not wake him up

"Hu-wha?!" He flails his arms as he falls off the chair in surprise. He groans as he struggles to pull himself up back onto the chair. "Urg… better not be another walking meat patty again. Seriously, Pete needs to stop doing those crazy meat experiments. I mean, I like the idea of instant-cook bacon but still…" He pulls his chair up to the screens and stands to get a closer look.

These screens hook up to all the cameras on the current level of the laboratory. The laboratory is separated into three main levels and many different sub-sections within each section. While each section has their main task of operations, they do often deviate from their original intent due to equipment only found in isolated sections. That, and laziness of the majority staff.

On the monitor, the vertically-impaired scientist sees a glowing creature walking passed the camera before stopping to wave at it happily. It took him a moment to realize that this creature is the notorious "Splosion Man" that has been blaring on the speakers for a number of hours now.

He jumps at this sudden realization. "Oh man, it's that crazy thing from the duplication experiment! I gotta stop him. Deploying robots!" He presses some buttons on the control console, deploying the attack droids to stop this menace.

With a whir of life, the mechanoids activates with their optic sensors glowing red. They move using their wheel as a singular mode of locomotion. They move forward to the location of the threat. They speed down the hallways and around a few corners to find him. When they round a corner, they come in contact with their target. They charge their electric tazers and dash towards him.

The wily experiment sees the robots and skids to a stop. He waves his arms at the robots. "Whoa whoa whoa! I don't play those kinds of games!"

The nearest robot tries to make a swing at him, only for splosion man to flip over it. Before the robot could process the target's location, it gets blown to bits by a sudden explosion from behind. It gets blown forward into many different pieces with sparks and metal shards all over the place.

With a quick motion from his glowing hands, he strikes a pose. He darts his eyes to the other two robots that have got to either side of him in an attempt to flank him. "Hey, would you two like to be friends?"

They answer this by charging at him.

When they did, he jumps in the air as high as possible. They end up electrocuting each other before they can realize their target isn't there. Their circuits and wires all end up frying. The loud sparks and jolts from their tazers stop moments later. Splosion man, lands a few feet away as the two bots fall over in a heap.

The hyperactive bomb looks back at the two before brushing himself off. "I thought only cars can do a million dollar pileup…" With that thought in mind, he makes his way further down the hall.

The miniature scientist looks at the screen with frustration. He stamps his foot down on his chair. "Urg! I knew we should have upgraded the guidance software! But does anyone listen? Nooooo!" After fuming and ranting, he calms down enough to try and evaluate the situation. "Now Kip, calm down and think. You don't want to end up like those idiots that tried to stop him bare handed." He looks at the screens again then at the map of the sub-level.

"Judging by the distance, current position, and possible routes: He'll make it here in less than 5 minutes. There must be a way to change his course… hm…" He looks up and down the map, from his recent data he found that "Splosion Man" is going down the hall that is supposed to branch off into three separate ways. "They are clearly labeled and even a maniac like that living time bomb can read." He hums to himself. "Perhaps I can lure him to one of the pathways…. But which one?"

He ponders about this possibility. The one in the middle goes straight to his position. He can't have that. Not unless he likes to be a pile of meat on the floor. The one on the right goes to the scientist lounge. Would stall that ball of fire, but would end up with a lot less scientists and a big pay cut afterwards. And the last path goes to another experimental device under construction. A quantum distorting particle beam. They were testing it out in hopes to use it as a new form of travel. It is suppose to teleport one object to another point in space and time. There are still problems with this device, with the major one being where the objects end up. They haven't calibrated the ending destination nor do they have the equipment to control it. Once the beam strikes an object, it sends it to an unknown location within time and space. No matter what they did, they couldn't control where the laser would teleport them.

Then it hits Kip like a sack of potatoes. "…. Of course, the laser! I can control it remotely from here… if I can lure him into the room and have him hold him still for a few seconds, and then I can adjust and heat up the laser. Then BAM!" He smacks his fist into his other hand. "That wild man is out of here." He rubs his hands together at the thought of thought of it happening and the big promotion he'll get for stopping a dangerous threat.

He realizes something important and stops for a moment.

"…. Now how do I lure him there…."

- - - - -

The volatile gentleman continues his way down the hallway. He decides to pass the time by acting like a chimp while running. He would have started skipping like a school girl if he did not stop at a three-way fork at the end of the hallway.

There were three steel doors that all had signs on them. The door in front of him shows a sign above it, "exit." The one on the left has a sign next to it telling it goes to the lounge and restroom. While he does feel the need to use the toilet, Splosion Man thinks he can hold it until he can get out. That leaves the last door. The sign for it has a rather sloppy handwriting with an arrow pointing to it. It says "cake room" in bold letters.

"Mmm… cake!" He felt all giddy and happy at the thought of eating cake. There's just something about cake that makes him want to eat it all up…. Which he does whenever he can. "Let's check out out what's behind door number 3!" He struts his way to the door on his right.

It opens up with an audible swoosh and lets him pass. Just as the door closes behind him, the sign that was crudely held beside it falls off. It then shows that underneath the sign is another sign, this one much more clearly written.

It says, "Danger: Quantum Laser Testing Ahead"

Splosion man finds himself in a dark room with the only source of light from a small flickering florescent light hanging from the ceiling. The place looks a bit spooky with no one around. Though this does not bother nor derail the excitable firecracker as he looks around for the cake.

"Caaaaake! Where are you?" He walks over to a desk and looks under it. "Are you there? …. Nope." He walks over to a trash bin and sticks his head in it. "Hellooooo!" He pulls his head out. "Hm, no cake in there." He leans against the desk and starts juggling his eyeballs with one hand. "Where's the cake? What kind of cake room is this? Did everyone eat them all? Who am I asking? What is the capital of Nevada?"

In the corner of his moving eyes, he sees something. "I spy with my little eyes…" He places the eyes back in his head looks to over to the spot where something tall and sweet looking is sitting. "… CAKE!" He dashes over it, arms out toward it hungrily. He makes a leap toward it and when he makes contact… he goes right through it. He stumbles forward with his face eating floor instead of white frosting. He looks back at the cake to see it flicker and fade before disappearing.

"…. Nooooo! The cake is a lie!"

The room lights up and a glass container drops down around him. The laser that has hidden itself in the shadows appears and points toward Splosion Man, getting ready to fire.

"I'm blowing this popsicle stand!" He tries to splode off the walls of his prison to break out. However, no matter how many times he tries, he can't seem to break out. He eventually runs out of energy and is forced to stop to rest. His body now looking like the equivalent of charcoal as he pants in exhaustion to try to get some power back into himself. "Okay… plan B" He starts running around the little chamber screaming like a little girl as the laser gets close to full power.

"Ahhhhhhhh! I'm too young and handsome to be blasted into subatomic particles!"

One of the speakers on the walls crackles to life. "There's nowhere to run now, Splosion Man." It is Kip from the security room. "I shall now blast you, sending your atoms to the far reaches of the universe where you shall never again return…. And I can get my promotion!"

"I can't die, I haven't escaped yet!"

"Too bad. You die, I get a fat paycheck" The laser takes aim, fully charged. "Any last requests?"

He stops and thinks for a moment. Then he looks at the speaker. "Wanna be friends?"

"Um…" Kips pauses before speaking again. "… no. Now as an experiment, I have to say this before they meet their imminent demise. Ahem… Goodbye and have a nice day."

"Ok, you too." He gives Kip, more accurately the speaker, a peace sign and smiles a goofy smile.

Just as he does, the laser fires a large pulse at him. It hits the container and causes a large burst of light to fill the room in a loud bang. Colors of different spectrums engulf the area before getting sucked back into the epicenter. When it does, there is nothing there. Only a large scorch mark where Splosion Man once stood.

Back in the security room, Kip sits there while trying to rub his eyes after having his screen white out. When he looks at the screen, he sees that the being that was Splosion Man is no longer there. He stares in silence before jumping up with joy, his fist pumping into the air.

"Booyah! Promotion, here I come!" He jumps off the chair and starts his way to the nearest phone. To which is on the wall a few feet above him outside the security room. He tries to reach for it, but couldn't get it due to his small stature.

"… damn it." He tries to go back inside to get his chair, but the door closed behind him and locks him out.

"Damn it!" He digs inside his coat pocket to get his clearance card. Only to his horror that it's not in his coat pocket. He left it on the counter, using it to put his coffee mug on.

"DAMN IT!"


Looks like Kip isn't gonna get his promotion anytime soon. But what of splosion man? Did I just kill him off in the first chapter? If I did, this wouldn't be much of a crossover, would it? Anywho, stay tuned and you'll get to see some kung fu… panda style!