Tis Shadowchan here, and I'm writing an entry to WillowClan's Writing Monthly Challenge. Or is it Monthly Writing Challenge . . . ? Enh.
Time will change, and so will names. ^^ If a name changes, so will have time.
Also, if any of you guys have read Smoke in the Shadows, or plan to, you can't read this one-shot. Many, many spoilers. Well, if you're in WillowClan you can, since it's the contest, but I would advise you not to. There is gore! D: You has been warned!
Prompt: It's never too late to live the life you've always wanted. It's never too late to correct past wrongs.
Ragged Edges
Clawblossom felt worn. The leaf-bare had been harsh, and her old bones were practically creaking whenever she tried to move. She growled in annoyance as a sharp pain lanced through her back as she tried to lay down in a different position. The elders den tilted, and she suddenly found herself on the ground, her head spinning.
She breathed out, slowly, trying to get her heartbeat to settle. Even moving hurt. Everything hurt. She pushed herself into a half crouching position, and her foreleg ached.
Why must every movement be painful? Clawblossom grumbled silently to herself. She sighed. She deserved to hurt. She deserved pain beyond meaning.
I'll be in the Dark Forest soon, she mused darkly.
Clawblossom almost heard Stormheart beside her. It was for the best, she would say, we're smarter cats now.
Why couldn't we have been smarter then? We could have stopped everything! We could have just been normal!
It was unavoidable.
We could have stopped!
Clawblossom wanted to wail aloud. She saw the kits playing in the clearing, the sunlight dappling their pelts into whirling colors that made her eyes water. She could have had kits of her own, stopped Stormheart from taking hold of her life. But Clawblossom knew she had been just a mouse in Stormheart's claws, just a tool to the white she-cat. Her head bowed, her eyes pressed shut.
Where did I go astray?
….
Clawpaw shivered violently.
How? How had she done this?
The unmoving lump of black and white fur lay still on the ground, ribbons of blood blossoming through the black grass. Clawpaw's own paws were shimmering in the moonlight, drenched with dripping red. How? How, how, how?
She couldn't stop the wave of revulsion that flowed over her pelt, making it stick straight into the frigid night air. The blood on her paws was the only hot thing, sticky and salty against her claws. It stench wreathed in the air, taunting her. We know what you did. We saw. You're bad. You're worse.
Clawpaw relived it over and over. Her own claws sinking into the black and white fur, a blood curdling screech, red splattering the flickering, moonlit ground. She couldn't process it; the cat, dead on the ground before her. How? It didn't seem real. Just a nightmare she would wake up from. But she couldn't run to her mother or father after she woke up, because they were gone, as dead as the unmoving black and white fur.
But there was no nightmare to wake up from.
Her eyes glazed over. What have I done? This is unforgivable. How will I live, knowing that I've killed?
The air sunk into her fur, unmoving. The shadows and moonlight played with the fur on the ground, flipping the colors from white to black, and to black to white. A game. Just a game. The death was gone, and there was just switching colors, black white, white black, red, always red ―
Clawpaw pressed her eyes closed as the ground tilted forward. When she opened them, her cheek was pressed against the Earth, grass caressing her face with its silky black fingers. Her claws were sunk deep into the dirt in front of her, breaking apart the carefully packed soil. She had done it. She had done what she had asked her to do.
"Good work."
Clawpaw closed her eyes again.
"Get up."
Clawpaw did as she was told, without opening her eyes. Her paw brushed fur, and her willpower relented, showing her a glimpse of a black paw touching her own as she opened her eyes. The claws of the black paw were still curved out, snagged bits of creamy fur on them. Clawpaw's own fur. She looked up to see the white stretch of the foreleg. The staring, bright green eyes, dulled forever; glinting with reflections of the stars they couldn't see.
"Look at me."
Clawpaw glanced up, her gaze hollow. The white she-cat was staring at her intensely, a wondering look in her eyes. She was the color of new-fallen snow, with black splotches on the undersides of her forelegs. The only thing black besides her legs was her tail; as dark as night from the base up. Her eyes glinted oddly, one bright blue, the other a dark green.
"Why?" Clawpaw's voice cracked as if she hadn't drank for sunrises. "Why? How can this help―"
"Silence," her voice sliced through Clawpaw's accusation. "It's all part of the plan."
"But how can you do this?" Clawpaw whispered. "How can you kill cats like it's nothing?"
She smiled crookedly, tilting her head to the side like a curious kit. The angle made moonlight fall on her green eye, and plunge her blue eye into shadow. "Practice."
Clawpaw shivered.
"So you do not get the satisfaction that I get, it seems?" she laughed at Clawpaw's dead expression. "Well, at least you were able to do it. Not many cats of eight moons manage to accomplish a task such as this."
Clawpaw's head whipped up, her heart beating rapidly. The white she-cat never gave praise. " . . . Really?"
The white she-cat nodded, her face darkened by the drifting shadows. "Really. Can you do something else for me?"
She wants me to kill someone else.
"From ShadowClan?" Clawpaw whispered, her heart fluttering like a trapped bird. Please, don't make me kill another clanmate―
The she-cat purred lightly. "No, just someone from RiverClan."
This information made Clawpaw feel only slightly better. Killing a cat was still killing a cat. The stench of blood was clogging her senses.
"Is every job I get going to be . . . killing?" her heart sank as she saw the she-cat's mismatched eyes flash. Anger from her was dangerous. She sunk to the ground, her belly scraping against the dry earth.
"We will see." the she-cat smiled her crooked smile, her anger dissipating into the wind.
Clawpaw's breath was shaky. "Will I have to kill another clanmate?"
Her smile grew wider. "Depends."
On what? What do I have to do to stop?
"Please, Storm―"
The white she-cat purred. "No. I am just simply not sure yet. Now, follow me."
Storm turned and bounded out of the moonlight and into the misty shadows. Clawpaw hesitated for a second, looking back at the lump of black and white fur. It shimmered in the icy moonlight, fooling her eyes into seeing the sides rising slowly with breath. But the cat was gone, and nothing would change that. No spirit lingered.
Clawpaw turned fully around to walk back to the body. The green eyes stared into the sky, seeming to glint with sorrow. She closed them gently, and the cat would have looked like it was sleeping, if not for the gaping wound at its throat. Blood still dribbled onto the grass around her paws.
Clawpaw crouched beside the cat; the cat she had known forever, the one that had been by her side for so long, like a second mother after her first died.
"I'm sorry Windshadow," she whispered, her voice breaking. I'm so unbearably sorry.
Suddenly, it felt as if a pelt was pressed against her own, icy and cold. Frosted breath was on her ear, and she barely heard the words that were breathed through the frigid night air.
"It's too late for apologies."
….
"Hey!"
Clawblossom cracked open an eye, anger rushing through her. That was the first time she had gotten some real sleep in sunrises! A tiny white kit was in front of her, it's green eyes sparkling.
She almost looks like Stormheart.
"Hi Clawblossom!" the kit trilled, her tail waving in the air behind her. "Can you tell me a story?"
"No," she growled, her fur bristling. "Go bother your mother, Frostkit."
"But Lilybreeze is busy!" Frostkit whined, "and I'm so bored! Please can you tell me a story? Just one little story?"
"I said no!" Clawblossom snarled. "Get out of my sight!"
"But I have nothing to do!" Frostkit's whine was more evident now. "Please, I just want to hear about Smokefrost!"
"I'm not telling any stories, so shoo," Clawblossom growled, turning away from the tiny white she-cat. Can't it just take a hint?
"I want a story!"
"That's too bad."
" . . . Please?"
"No!"
Clawblossom turned to tell the kit to leave, and saw that she had disappeared. Good riddance. She lay her head on her paws, her breath quickening. Too much exertion was not good. Frostkit was the most annoying of all the kits, always begging for a story of Smokefrost, her namesake.
Smokefrost and Frostkit's mother, Lilybreeze, were littermates. They had been close, and when the great Prophecy of Smoke was leaked through the clan, it was said that Smokefrost would be ShadowClan's savior. She had disappeared for many moons in her apprenticeship, and when she had come back, she had news of the Rogue's coming attack. She helped defeat the fierce enemy, and everyone lived 'happily ever after.'
Stupid she-cat.
Everything Clawblossom had worked for was with the rogues, and Smokefrost had ruined all the careful plans Storm had made.
Yet that still hadn't mattered in the end.
Smokefrost had been closely intertwined with the murders, having seen the first one herself as a kit. Storm had been working since she was five moons old, training in combat and murder. Smokefrost had been Smokekit when the rogue's first murders took place, and she fought to stop them. Clawpaw had tried to follow Smokekit into the forest one time, and that was when she had first met Storm.
She had been nice, helpful, always treating her like a warrior. Clawpaw hadn't known that Storm was a murderer, until all the truth rushed out. She hadn't known what to do. Her one and only friend was a murderous rogue, bent on the destruction of her own clan.
What other choice did I have?
Storm was so kind, so beautiful, so energetic and happy. She lured Clawpaw in, twisting her decisions, making it seem as if the murders had a purpose.
And they did . . . but Clawblossom wasn't so sure.
Then Storm joined ShadowClan, taking on the place of a helpless, hungry loner.
Smokefrost, Smokepaw then, had always hated Storm, and was suspicious. Clawblossom's ears flattened. Smokepaw had always been in the way, and Clawpaw had once heard her talk of Storm being familiar with her sister. But Clawpaw had never been sucked in by such trickery.
Storm became a part of the clan, and everyone found her as alluring as Clawpaw had. She started making new friends, getting closer and closer to the mousebrain Emberpaw. Storm insisted that Clawpaw was her only friend, but the apprentice knew different.
Smokepaw and Lilypaw were always persistent, but their only other littermate didn't stay away from Clawpaw.
Gorsepaw.
Clawblossom's head bowed, and bitter sadness took hold of her heart.
….
"What do you want to be? A good fighter? Hunter?" Clawpaw tried to make conversation, but the moon was rising higher, and Storm was expecting her.
"I just want to be loyal to my clan."
Clawpaw brushed against his warm, gorse-colored fur. "I guess so, too."
He looked down on her. "I also want to be the best that I can be."
Her fur grew hot as he looked away, and she felt a tingling in her stomach. Why was she always nervous around him?
"Gorsepaw . . . ?"
"Yes?"
"Do you think . . . do you think that I could be a good warrior?" her face burned as her gaze dropped from the moon to her paws, and she felt him looking at her. She was always wondering, because she had no mother, father, or close friends to ask. Her only friend, Birchpaw, was too ignorant, and Windshadow . . . was gone. She winced as her heart clenched. Storm also wouldn't know the answer, not being clanborn.
"Of course!" Gorsepaw purred, nudging her with his shoulder. "What kind of question is that? You'll be a great warrior! You're fast, smart, and you have really long claws," his joking tone almost broke her heart.
You would hate me if you knew what I've done. "Thanks."
"No problem. Oh, I'm cold!" he pressed closer to her, and she looked away from his warm blue eyes, her heart fluttering like a trapped bird. Her paws felt hot, and she shuffled them in the cool grass.
"Sorry!" he said, pulling back, his eyes wide.
"It's okay," she muttered, her gaze dropping to her paws. "I'm just a bit jumpy tonight."
"How so?" he pressed their pelts together again, and she shivered.
"I'm just . . ."―she sighed―" I'm just scared about the murders." Her tail was flicking continually now in discomfort.
His gaze darkened. "Yeah; I was shocked when they found Emberpaw's mom. Windshadow was always nice to us."
Clawpaw's eyes widened, and she tried to hide her thumping heart. "I―I, uh, yeah, no one would ever expect her to go off in the woods like that . . ."
His gaze narrowed in worry. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." But Clawpaw felt like she was going to fall over, her head tilting dizzily. She wanted to admit it, right then and there, everything that she had done. But she knew she couldn't, because he would immediately hate her. She could imagine his face twisted into a snarl of shock and loathing. She looked up into his concerned expression. She especially didn't want him to hate her. Tears filled her eyes, and she glanced away.
"It's getting late . . ." she said quietly, her tail flicking.
"Yeah," he agreed, getting up. He touched his nose to hers, and happiness flared in her chest again. He didn't hate her.
And he would never find out.
"Bye," she whispered, smiling.
Gorsepaw grinned back. "Bye! You come back to camp soon, okay?"
Clawpaw nodded. He turned and bounded away through the undergrowth. She sat, the moonlight spilling over her pelt. Was this what it was like to feel utterly happy? She purred softly to herself. But then the weight of her 'favors' for Storm fell back onto her shoulders. She would never be as carefree as Gorsepaw. He would be happy, loyal, brave and loving, while she sat in the shadows with the rest of the traitors. Her ears flattened, and her tail drooped to the ground. She and Gorsepaw could never be anything more than friends, because she would always have to lie to him.
She swirled a single, long, black claw in the grass before her. Would he really hate her if she had told him? She wanted to believe that he wouldn't, but there just wasn't that option. She was a murderous traitor to the clans, and he would always be loyal. He would probably find a mate with . . . Cloverpaw, and forget all about her. He would grow old, have kits, protect his clan.
She would be found out in a few moons, and she would be banished with the rest of the rogues.
Clawpaw started crying softly, her shoulders hunched and her head lowered. Why had she done this? She had killed and eavesdropped, and for what? Glory? Popularity? To live among rogues? All the possibilities flashed through her head, and she felt lost; so unbearably lost.
Something crackled in the bushes and her weeping stopped. There was more rustling in the undergrowth, and she jumped silently to her paws, all the lethal training Storm had given her pounding through her veins. Whoever it was couldn't be stupid enough to be that loud, but still stay completely out of sight.
Someone wanted her to come.
Clawpaw started forward through the bushes, her paws falling into little pools of water as she made her way across the marsh. Whoever was leading her made noise, but was still unseen.
Suddenly, there was a strangled cry. Clawpaw froze. The scream was suddenly muffled, cut off.
She raced forward, now not following anything. Her heartbeat almost burst from her chest, one single beat ringing true, no, no, no, no―
She burst into a small, dry clearing in the middle of the marsh. Storm was standing over something that was squirming under her claws; something that had heartbreakingly familiar, gorse-colored fur.
"Clawpaw―" Storm shoved Gorsepaw's face viciously into the dirt before he could finish his sentence.
"Gorsepaw― I, I . . ." she stared at Storm, terror on her face. "Please, Storm! I beg you!" she wailed, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I―I'll do anything, just please―"
Storm's hiss sliced through her words like icy claws. "No! You defied me! You cannot have any distractions, don't you remember, you insolent kit!" her face was livid, her eyes wild and dangerous. Her gaze flashed to Gorsepaw, trembling in the dirt, and she raked her claws down the side of his face. Blood splattered the dusty ground, and he yowled in agony, his eye blinded. Clawpaw cried out in horror, and tried to rush forward to help. Storm knocked her out of the way with a single kick from her hindleg, the blow sending her flying back several tail-lengths. The breath was crushed out of her chest as she crumpled into the dust, gasping on the ground, her eyes streaming.
"This I will not let you have!" Storm snarled, bringing her claws up, high in the air. They glinted wickedly in the moonlight, blood flicking from them and onto the ground. Her mismatched gaze was glinting with a terrible, murderous fury that Clawpaw had never seen before.
Storm brought her paw crashing down on Gorsepaw's throat, and it seemed as if he were torn in two. Blood spurted everywhere from around Storm's claws, her screech of anger mingling with Gorsepaw's howl of defiance and pain. Clawpaw struggled to her feet, nausea rolling over her in waves. She used the last of her strength to spring at Storm, barreling her over.
They fell to the ground. Clawpaw had Storm pinned beneath her, and all she wanted to do was claw and rip her face until she felt as much pain that she and Gorsepaw had. Storm's anger melted into her usual cool demeanor.
"You're going to kill me? Over a little tom that got in the way of our plan?" her voice was not scared, but cold and calculating.
All Clawpaw could manage was a broken whisper. "How could you?"
"He doesn't mean anything to me. He's just like all the other cats that I've killed." Her odd eyes glinted maliciously.
Clawpaw screwed her eyes shut and lifted her claws. Storm was like mist, melting away from underneath of her paws. Clawpaw looked up.
She was gone.
She couldn't have killed Storm. It wasn't part of the plan. She had to stick to it, or she'd be nothing; now that Gorsepaw was gone.
Clawpaw turned to Gorsepaw, her heart feeling as if it were made of ice. He lay, twisted, a couple of tail-lengths ahead, blood drying in his matted fur. He seemed to be choking, and she pushed her paws faster, stumbling forward.
He gazed up her with one, sad eye. So much was said in that moment, his thoughts becoming clear in his last sorrowful look.
"I . . . I . . ." He coughed, blood splattering from his muzzle. Clawpaw shivered, and pressed her pelt against his.
"I'm sorry."
"I . . . I need . . . tell . . . you . . . important . . ." Coughs racked his body, and she felt his heartbeat become weaker and more irregular. He couldn't get any more words out. His coughing got more and more violent, blood speckling the dust around his muzzle. Clawpaw pressed her cheek into his side, trying to give him comfort.
His heart finally stopped, and his eyes widened. His gaze stared into the distance, and he looked like he had never seen anything so beautiful.
Gorsepaw, I'm sorry.
….
Tears ran down Clawblossom's cheeks as she sobbed quietly. She was curled in a tight ball in the back of the elders den, the shadows caressing her pelt gently, as if telling her not to worry, and not to cry. The sadness welled in her heart, bitter and terrible. Her bony shoulders hunched, and her claws pricked the nest material under her trembling body. No one could see her or give her comfort. There was no one.
How could I have done all that? And I thought it was for the good of my spieces! I thought they deserved to die, the nameless rogues, Windshadow, Sandwing, Gorsepaw, Fangfoot, Fallenpaw – She cried harder, her face shoved into the leaves of the walls. It was all worth nothing! There is nothing worth the suffering of my clanmates.
Light filtered through the den entrance, and Clawblossom tried to compose herself. She wouldn't let anyone see her in such a state. The tears dried on her face, and she buried her muzzle into the moss under her paws. After all those seasons, she was again wondering, how? How, how, how?
"Clawblossom? Clawblossom, are you alright?"
The elderly she-cat licked her paws, and quickly combed them over her face hurriedly. She turned, and tried to put on a contemptuous look, but she felt cold to the core. "What do you want, Frostpaw?"
The white apprentice looked at her uncertainly, concern in her bright blue eyes. "You haven't been in the clearing in moons! You didn't even come out for my apprentice ceremony," Frostpaw's ears flattened.
"I just don't have the energy anymore."
She snorted. "I doubt that!" Clawblossom's fur bristled, but she heard the note of insincerity in her voice. Frostpaw didn't think Clawblossom would last much longer. She lowered her head in sadness. Soon, she would only have the shadowy traitors of the clans for company. Her ears flattened. She was one of the shadowy traitors of the clans.
"Frostpaw . . ."
"Yes?" the white apprentice's ears pricked.
"I'm sorry."
". . . For what?"
But Clawblossom stayed silent. She curled into a tight ball again in the shadows. She heard Frostpaw shuffle her paws, but she then began cleaning away the old moss in silence. She left the den without another word, hesitating in the entrance for a heartbeat.
Shoulders hunched, Clawblossom tried not to cry again. She was trembling, the light of the day not reaching into the dark corner where she lurked.
How could I have done it all?
She hadn't even noticed she was asleep, but noise in the clearing awoke her. Someone was talking right outside of the den. She strained her old ears, and heard the pretty voice of Brightstar. She also recognised Hollyfall, the new medicine cat after Rainear died.
". . . everything running smoothly?"
"Yes, it's just that the tensions are very high with RiverClan. I wouldn't be surprised if the dawn patrol came back with news of a skirmish."
"I hope not, Brightstar, we're not in shape enough to take a full fledged battle."
"I know, but it might be unavoidable. How's Cloverwind doing?"
"Don't worry, it's just an infected pad, she'll survive. You don't have to be scared for your deputy's life. She'll be fine."
"I'm just worried . . . what about . . ." the leader dropped her voice to a whisper that she could barely hear. "What about Clawblossom?"
There was silence. Clawblossom just had time to lower her head again and shut her eyes before Hollyfall's head ducked through the entrance of the elders den. Her silhouette paused for a heartbeat, before disappearing again into the light-filled clearing.
"I don't know, she looks pretty bad."
There was a couple of moment of silence, and Clawblossom could feel her heart thumping loudly in her chest.
"How long do you think she'll last?"
More silence.
". . . Not long."
Serves me right, Clawblossom thought bitterly. It was final, she only had so much longer to live. And then she would go to basically a living hell.
I ruined my entire life. It's too late to fix anything.
….
Clawpaw was crouched in the shadows of her den, adrenaline pumping through her veins.
When are they coming? Come on!
The moon was high in the sky, just a single night from full, and shining at its peak. The rest of the world was plunged into darkness, Clawpaw's eyes glinting from the shadows. Her paws were the only things stretching out into the moonlight, her unsheathed claws glinting wickedly.
Where are they?
A yowl suddenly pierced the cool air. Muttering broke out among her denmates, who started to stretch and glance around with wary eyes like stars in the dark.
Clawpaw tried not to look too eager. Her final moment; her final chances to show to the Shadows that she was worth being one of their rogues! She crept out of hiding an into the clearing. Everything was plunged into dense moonlight, the grass flickering with silver like and ocean of stars. There were more yowls now, getting closer, mingling together in a single blood-curdling howl. The camp was alive, half asleep clan cats shoving their way out of their warm dens and into the shivering cold.
"What is the meaning of this?" Brightstar cried, stepping forward with her eyes ablaze. "What is happening?"
Storm stepped forward. "The time is now!" her call was defiant and cold, but something was glimmering in her eyes.
Uncertainty.
What?
She leaped on Brightstar without a sound, and Clawpaw saw terrible shock and realization flooding the leader's face. The clan would have been on top of Storm in a second, if not for the wave of felines that flooded from the camp walls. ShadowClan knew nothing of what was happening, and disappeared under the tide of rogues that lept, screeching, onto them. Screams of bloodlust and terror echoed through the camp walls, and Clawpaw let out a caterwaul herself, leaping on a rogue a few tail-lengths away. The tom snarled terribly and kicked her off, slicing off a pawful of fur from her leg. She cried out in pain, staring up at him with wide eyes.
"I'm on your side!" she yowled, squirming as he pinned her down under his huge, hooked claws.
He shoved his muzzle into her face, twisted with rage. His breath smelled of crowfood, and she gagged, trying to twist away. He showed no sign of surprise at her statement.
"It better stay that way. Storm and I don't take traitors."
Then he melted away, and she was free to scramble to her paws, wincing at the small wound on her shoulder. She whipped her head around, her gaze darting to all sides, trying to find Storm. Her eyes found the white she-cat in a terrible battle with Cloverpaw and Birchpaw, who looked bloody and torn. They were lost from her sight, and she looked around more, this time for an opponent.
She saw Fallenpaw dragging himself over the ground, his leg limp and matted with blood. As soon as his eyes found Clawpaw, they lit up in fierce hope.
I'm sorry.
She leaped at him with a high-pitched snarl, sinking her claws into his shoulders as she landed. His eyes widened, and he seemed too shocked to make a sound.
"Clawpa―?" He couldn't finish saying her name, as she ducked down and buried her fangs into his throat. He screeched in shock and terror, and she felt the blood running down his neck and her legs, streaming onto the cool grass. It was hot and sticky in her fur, and tangy and salty in her mouth; all she felt was the terrible want to bite down, all the way. She shook her head back and forth viciously, and she felt the sick thump of his limp head on her shoulder as it was flung from side to side.
She finally stopped, panting, and dropped his limp body. It hit the ground with a dull thud, the neck flopping at an odd angle. The light had long since faded from his eyes, and he was left with a grimace of pain and shock. She shuddered and stepped away, the spell of bloodlust leaving her body. Everyone was so amerced in the battle that not a single cat saw her kill her fellow apprentice. Her head bowed, and a single tear dropped onto Fallenpaw's tabby fur. It mixed with the flow of blood that was running from his neck.
Something slammed into her side, barreling her over. She gave a startled cry, before disappearing underneath a caterwauling ball of matted gray fur. She battered her back paws at the she-cat's belly with her claws sheathed, and the rogue did the same.
"You're on our side?" the rogue she-cat hissed as she pretended to claw Clawpaw's face with feathery paws.
"Yes!" she pinned the she-cat down, sinking her teeth into her shoulder. Clawpaw stopped when her teeth pricked flesh, and the she-cat writhed, screeching, as if the bite actually hurt. She wriggled from underneath of Clawpaw, and sprinted into the fighting again. Clawpaw smirked. The fake fight probably made it look like she was actually fighting for ShadowClan. The cream-colored apprentice looked around with wild eyes, before spotting a frosty silver-gray pelt.
Smokepaw.
Clawpaw knew what she did was stupid, but she couldn't help it. Just as Smokepaw whirled around to face her, she raked her claws across the apprentice's muzzle, yowling in fury. So much anger and annoyances had been caused by the stupid she-cat, and Clawpaw couldn't control herself.
"What are you doing?" Smokepaw screeched, her face livid. She apparently couldn't keep back her temper, and sprang onto Clawpaw, pinning her down.
She wriggled out from underneath Smokepaw, smooth as a snake. She forgot all the fancy killing blows Storm had taught her, and had just one thought blazing through her mind: I need to cause her pain. "I'm doing what I should have done moons ago!"
Smokepaw screamed in rage and tried to rake her claws down Clawpaw's face. She spun away, nicking her claws on Smokepaw's shoulder. The gray apprentice was quick though, and whirled around, ready for a counter attack; springing on Clawpaw. She screeched and tried to wriggle away, but Smokepaw sunk her claws into the cream-colored apprentice's shoulders, giving her sharp pains if she moved at all.
Suddenly, light dawned in Smokepaw's eyes. "We're clanmates!" she spat in disgust. The weight disappeared off of Clawpaw, and Smokepaw lept away into the battle.
Clawpaw's ears burned in shame. She had let herself be beaten by the measly gray apprentice! She growled in frustration and flung herself into battle, furiously clawing her rogue allies without sheathing her claws. She was furious, but she still didn't want to give her traitorous position away to ShadowClan.
She jumped onto a golden tabby she-cat and clawed her blindly, rage pounding through her chest. The she-cat writhed and screeched, pushing her away.
"Stupid kit! Aren't you the one that's on our side?"
Clawpaw snarled and flung herself away from the rogue she-cat, jumping onto a gray tom. He had familiar tabby stripes, and when he saw her, his eyes widened.
"Clawpaw! What are you―?" She sunk her teeth into Fangfoot's neck, his screech of fury mingling with the other screams in the blood-soaked clearing. He fell away from her jaws, choking and convulsing, drowning in his own blood. She shuddered, and stepped away from him, throwing herself back into battle.
But suddenly, the fighting stopped. Screeches of terror sounded through the camp, and Clawpaw saw with shock that it was coming from the Shadows, rather than from the huddled ShadowClan cats.
A bloody she-cat limped through the crowd, pushing her way to the front with a terrible snarl. The rogues watched with wide eyes as the cats parted to show a white she-cat crouching over a tom. The tom was the very one that had attacked Clawpaw in the beginning, and the she-cat had familiar, wild, mismatched eyes.
"Storm . . . ?" Clawpaw whispered, terrified.
"What are you doing Storm?" Brightstar's voice rang around the bloody clearing, high and cold; Clawpaw realized that she was the limping she-cat. "Why are you about to kill your own leader?"
Storm appraised her with an equally cold voice. "He is not my leader."
Mutters echoed across the camp, rogues and ShadowClan cats alike. Storm's treachery to ShadowClan was known widely.
"Then who is?" Brightstar raised her head, slightly taller than the young Storm.
"You."
Shocked voices rippled around the clearing now, and a few rogues snarled, their fur bristling.
"What will you do?" Brightstar didn't seem shocked in the least. Storm looked down at her former leader, ice in her eyes.
"I'm going to kill him."
….
"Clawblossom! Stormheart! Clawblossom! Stormheart!" the cheers rang around the clearing, and Stormheart showed a rare smile, her eyes glimmering with a happiness that Clawblossom had never seen before.
She didn't feel happy at all.
When the camp cleared as cats went to their dens, Stormheart settled herself beside Clawblossom, a small smile on her face.
"I'm glad I made the right choice," she whispered, purring softly.
The right choice? You ruined my life!
"How can you say that?" Clawblossom snarled under her breath, and Stormheart's eyes hardened. "You killed so many cats! You made me kill too!"
"You chose to help me," Stormheart's fur was bristling.
"You . .. you forced me to!" but Clawblossom knew that she could have stopped it if she tried.
Stormheart's ears flattened as she looked out into the distance. "I changed. Simple as that."
Clawblossom's eyes flashed open as yowls echoed around the clearing. She had a rush of deja-vu, and suddenly wondered if she was dreaming again. But when she tried to leap to her paws, her old muscles screamed in protest and she crumpled into her nest. She managed to stand up, ever so slowly, and limp to the entrance of the den. The beginnings of dawn was just shedding its rosy light over the forest, and writhing masses of cats could be seen, blood splattering the newborn sunlight. The image was wrong; such a peaceful, loving hour of StarClan's wasn't meant to be misused like this.
"ShadowClan! Stay strong!" it was Cloverstar, yowling over the screams of the fray.
It all happened too fast.
Her clanmates were fighting with their all, but the battle was clearly being lost. The ShadowClan forces were withering quickly, and RiverClan had brought a full fighting team. They moved through the ShadowClan cats with flawless ease, breaking down any attempted walls of defense. Her clanmates were outnumbered, desperately trying to stay alive.
Her gaze fell on Lilybreeze, who was trying to hold her own against a huge gray tabby. The RiverClan tom jumped on her, and she whipped away, but one paw slid out from underneath of her, and she fell to the ground. The tabby was on top of her instantly, and Clawblossom heard Frostpaw's mother's scream of agony over the roar of the battle.
I have to stay hidden.
Her ears flattened. She didn't hear much truth in her own thoughts.
Suddenly, a piercing scream rang through the clearing. It was high and full of blood-curdling fear. It made Clawblossom's fur bristle, piercing her insides. Her eyes widened. She knew who was making the horrible sound.
Frostpaw.
Clawblossom staggered into the clearing, her legs hardly holding her. She tried to run, and managed a broken, limping trot, dodging hordes of fighting cats. Snarls and screeches ripped through the morning air, the stench of blood burrowing into her fur.
Something crashed into her side, and she numbly noticed herself flying through the air. She hit the ground with a sickening thud, and felt the breath crushed from her chest. She gasped for air as the tom sunk his claws into her fur.
No, I have to . . . Frostpaw . . .
Clawblossom struggled to push the tom off of her body, but he was too immense.
I have to fight for my clan!
She growled croakily and desperately tried to claw him. He chuckled blatantly, and pushed down her struggling paws.
"You'll be dead soon granny. Better not push it." He leaped off her and disappeared into the fray of screeching cats.
She pulled herself off the ground and onto her paws. Her legs trembled terribly, hardly holding up her weight any longer.
I have to . . .
She struggled forward, searching the battle. Several enemy warriors watched, laughing aloud when they saw her struggling. But they didn't attack, and that was what was important.
Another scream pierced the air, and Clawblossom used the last of her strength to rush forward, towards the source of the heartbreaking cry. And there, writhing under a golden tom, was Frostpaw. Her pelt was torn and bloodied, her eyes dull. Clawblossom took a step forward, a growl rumbling in her throat. The RiverClan warrior didn't notice her. She took another painful step, her sides heaving for breath. She had never felt such exhaustion in her life.
Another step.
Clawblossom's heart felt like it would burst from her chest. Her vision blurred double, and she stumbled. She just managed to see Frostpaw get a terrible slash to her face.
No!
With the last drop of her strength, Clawblossom leaped at the tom, her claws outstretched as far as they would go. A band of sunlight spilled through the clouds, blinding her vision and blocking her sight of the tom. Endless energy seeped into her muscles and she felt as if she could fly with StarClan.
This is it.
Her claws tore into the tom's side, and she barely heard his snarl of pain. All she felt was light and strength, unfeeling to the open hole that was torn into her throat. Frostpaw screamed again, this cry in terror.
Clawblossom thumped to the ground, her moment of strength fading. Blood pooled under her neck and she suddenly realized, it was never too late, she could fix the mistakes of the past.
"I'm sorry, Frostpaw . . . tell them all that I'm sorry . . ."
"Clawblossom!" the apprentice wailed, "Clawblossom no! Please―"
"Tell them . . . I'm sorry . . . my treachery . . ." But she was floating away.
Clawblossom closed her eyes, no longer feeling the ground under her pelt. The earth was gone, disappearing from reality.
She finally opened her eyes, expecting the gripping shadows of the Dark Forest to greet her.
But instead, she saw the brightness of stars.