AN: This story is dedicated to all the Wednesday Night Girls on Twitter and Facebook. With much love, Kricket
What He Wants by Kricket Wiliams
Penelope sat on her couch in her shorty pajamas and robe, eating a box of marshmallow Peeps and watching Love Actually. She was pouting, which wasn't like her. She was a bubbly sort of happy-go-lucky person. Not only that, but when she surrounded herself with her favorite things, those things cheered her up immensely. She loved anything with Colin Firth—who didn't?—and she adored the cute little faces on the sugary yellow chicks. This time, however, they weren't doing the trick.
Yet again, she was alone on a Friday night. Not that she minded. Although she was very social, she liked having time to herself once in a while. It was just that this Friday was the fifth Friday in a row...and she missed him.
With a sigh of disgust, Penelope popped another Peep into her mouth, trying to chew the wad of marshmallow fluff. She was being ridiculous. She didn't have a reason to grouse. She wanted Derek to be happy. She really did. And he was happy.
He just wasn't with her.
It was just...well...Friday used to be their night. Although it was an unwritten rule, it was sacred to her. Not that they did anything of importance; they'd watch movies together. One week, she'd pick the flick; the next week, it was his choice. It didn't matter what they picked—they rarely saw what was playing. They were too busy talking and laughing and cuddling. Kevin, Sam, and any other guy she'd been with knew that and had to deal.
Why didn't she know that?
Guilt rolled over her. Savannah was a nice girl. There wasn't a dang thing wrong with her. She was pretty—no, that was a lie. Savannah was beautiful. The female equivalent to her gorgeous BFF. "Morgan in heels," she'd said. They were a perfect match. They'd get married someday and have equally stunning babies.
Somehow, that didn't cheer her up.
She really was being ridiculous. Of course she liked Savannah...Penelope had helped them get together. Derek had talked to her about how Savannah had left him with her dog so she could go to work. In other words, Derek had been "Morganed": left in the spur of a moment to go to the job. Penelope knew Dr. Savannah was successful, and she understood the importance of work and wouldn't give Derek a hard time about how his work came first. The way he talked—all mooney, like a high school boy—this wasn't a fling. She knew he really liked this one.
So, she'd given advice, she'd cheered him up, and she'd even helped Savannah with a seduction scene. Derek's happiness came first over everything in her life. She'd done what he would've done—what he'd done in the past for her: she'd helped him get what he wanted. Because she loved him, and she was his friend.
Tossing the box of sweets aside, she stretched, and then she clicked the remote and shut off the television and movie player. She needed to chuck this bad attitude and knock it off. She was supportive. She was kind. And above all, she was a good friend.
His best friend...even if things were a little awkward right now.
Taking her empty glass, complete with purple swirly straw, to her kitchen, she put it in her sink. She was planning on taking a shower. Oooh! Or a bath. She'd turn it into a spa, shave her legs, put on a masque. With cucumber slices for her eyes. She reached in her fridge. She had slices. They were always on hand; she was a perpetual dieter.
Cukes in hand, she headed toward her bathroom. It was going to be relaxing and—
A knock at her door stopped her mid-pursuit. She turned and went to the door, looking out the peephole.
"Morgan?" she squeaked before opening the door. "What are you doing here?"
He grinned at her, his thousand-watt smile that could light up an arena. "Hi. Can I come in?"
"Of course!"
Penelope stepped aside, letting him pass. She took the cucumbers she had in her hand and popped them in her mouth instead, chewing and crunching them.
Derek tossed off his coat and doffed his shoes, and then she noticed he was holding a movie. He held it up. "I brought Iron Man 2."
"Nobody liked that one," she argued automatically, like they had done for years over movies, and then she shook her head. "Movie? You're here for a movie?"
He smiled again, less wattage than his first one. "I was hoping..."
"What about Savannah?" she asked.
Derek walked over to her Blu-Ray player. "She's working."
A touch of irritation rolled over Penelope. Maybe it was the way he'd walked in like he owned the place after she hadn't seen him in forever. Or maybe it was the crappy choice in movie. Or maybe it was because she was the second choice yet again.
Either way, she let that irritation show when she answered him a touch sarcastically, "Please. Go ahead. Choose."
"I think it's my night," he answered.
"Do you even have a night anymore?" she snipped.
If he'd heard her, he gave no indication of it.
"Love Actually?" he groused as he removed the movie and plopped in his choice. "You've seen that what...eight hundred times?"
"It's my Blu-ray player!"
He stood, grinning. "Did I buy it for you, sweetness?"
He had, the rat. Her techspertise was limited to computers. They'd watched so many movies, and he'd wanted her to have the "ultimate experience," and of course, have the experience when he was there.
Which was never now.
She crossed her arms over her ample bosom. "My DVD player was fine. You didn't have to buy it."
"But I wanted to," he replied, his voice soft and sweet and gentle and cajoling, like it usually was when he wanted to butter her up.
It didn't work. She was too annoyed, too upset, too...too...too uber hurt to just play nice and let him be there. She wanted him there, desperately, but not because he had nothing else to do. She could've gone out with Kevin or Sam or another man any of those Friday nights, but she didn't, dammit!
She didn't.
He did.
She raised her chin. "Derek. I think this might not be a good night to hang out."
The smile he had on his face dissipated. "Penelope, what's going on?"
"Nothing."
He arched a brow and took a seat on the back of her couch, perched like a really good-looking bird. "Baby, I know this has nothing to do with your DVD player. Spill."
She cringed at the use of her nickname. "You shouldn't call me that."
He'd been calling her Penelope and Garcia an awful lot at work lately. The flirting had melted down to nil. Yet another thing that made things off between them...and gave her a feeling she'd been replaced.
Which was ridiculous yet again, because she'd never been in the place to be replaced.
"What?" he asked, frowning, thinking, and then understanding must've hit. "Baby Girl?"
Her heart gave a pained jolt, and she stared at the ground, unable to meet the hurt look in his eyes. "I get it, Derek. It isn't right. You have a different Baby Girl in your life."
"Isn't right?" His look was incredulous. "You have been my number one Baby Girl forever. Ain't nothing gonna change that."
"No." She shook her head. "It changed. Right away, it did."
"Penelope, I do not call her that."
A bitter little laugh nearly escaped her. Did he really think all it had to do with was the name? "Derek, don't you see? Everything has changed."
It had. She got it. He had a girlfriend, and life ran on Savannah's schedule—or rather, the time he could squeeze in with Savannah.
"Sweetheart, I don't understand," he stated, exasperation evident in his tone and his expression. "I thought you liked Savannah?"
"I do," she said quickly. It was honest. She did. She cringed and pulled a face, not wanting to lie to him. "Mostly."
"What does that mean?"
Oh, dear. There he sat on the back of her couch, five feet away, and along with a healthy dose of frustration, concern and caring were written all over his face. He was worried about her, and he cared about her, just like the best friend he'd always been.
Shoot. One look at him, and she knew, his feelings for her hadn't changed. This wasn't his fault. He was trying to make two hectic schedules work. And being in a new relationship... She knew what it was like. It was fresh and fun, and maybe he'd gotten carried away, too? She should've cut him some slack.
She should've been his friend.
Frack. She really got herself into a pickle with her jealous little hissy fit, and now she was going to have to dig herself out of it. Well, the truth would have to do.
"I like her. I do," she said slowly. "But sometimes...I miss being the number one girl in your life."
His look softened. "Penelope—"
She continued, saying what she needed to say before she chickened out. "I miss your nicknames, and your smiles, and your Fridays. I miss running to you when I need to cuddle or I need a hug. I miss being the one who is sexy and brilliant and your God-given solace.
"I thought I'd be fine, sharing you; I really did. And I will be." She swallowed hard, a lump that formed in her throat. She was certain it was part of her heart. "I miss being your only Baby Girl."
"Sweetheart—"
She held her hands up to keep him from talking. "It's more than that, though. I really want to be supportive, and I want you to have a relationship."
He paused. "Like you had with Lynch."
"Yes," she answered, nodding, and then shook her head. "No. Different than what I had with Kevin. Better. More serious."
"Four years is pretty damn serious, Garcia," he said flatly.
"Well...yes," she said with a sheepish shrug, and then added, "but Kevin knew his place. He knew you always came first."
She stopped, realizing what that meant to her, what she'd been afraid to face for so many years. Her heart pounded painfully in her chest. She didn't just love him—she was in love with him.
She felt the blood run from her face. Foolish, foolish heart! she chastised herself. They'd teased for years, but for her...it had been real. It had always been real, but she hadn't—she couldn't—say it to him.
It was her greatest desire, her number one fantasy. It was the fairytale she'd always dreamed of, and had deep down believed that maybe—just maybe—it could come true.
She'd even teased he was secretly in love with her. The only one in love was her.
She should've known better than to do that to either of them, to even dream something like that. She was a smart woman. Women who lived in the real world knew men like Morgan didn't fall for girls like her.
She'd been quiet, and Derek was watching her carefully, like he was studying her.
He was far too perceptive, and she didn't want his pity, so she added quickly, "And the team, of course!"
"Of course," he replied.
"The point is...the bottom line for me...is that I want you to be happy." She cleared her throat. "I...love you, Derek. You're the best man I know, and you should have what you want."
"What I want..."
She nodded quickly in response.
"And what I want is Savannah?" he questioned, but gently.
"Yes," Penelope said, nodding.
As she looked at him, a longing she had only let herself feel in her dreams rose and took precedence above everything else. It was so overwhelming, the love she felt, it nearly overtook her.
Giving him what he wants...no matter what the cost, her awakened heart whispered.
She quickly looked down at her feet to avoid eye contact with him. The room became too small, and it was hard to breathe. God, this hurt! Maybe in time, it would stop hurting, but right now, it was the most painful thing she'd ever experienced. Time was supposed to heal all wounds, and he was never really hers to lose. Another fairy tale, gone and smashed.
Time to grow up and find someone attainable...someone just like her, who could be "Garcia in flats."
She tried to swallow back the tears and continued to stare at her feet that desperately needed a pedicure. Two other feet joined the view, large ones in dark socks.
"You're wrong."
Her gaze shot up to his immediately, mindless of her tears. "Wrong?"
"I know—you are always right," he said, a soft smile curving his perfect lips as he cupped her cheek in his large, warm palm. "But perhaps, Penelope—my Baby Girl—perhaps you should let me determine what I want."
She gasped as he wrapped his other arm around her waist and pulled her flush against him. He didn't say another word as he stole his hand from her cheek to around to the back of her head and lowered his mouth to settle possessively on her lips.
A rush of pure pleasure washed over her, and a seductive darkness fogged her vision, making her close her eyes. Everything was spinning, like she was in a dream that she never wanted to wake from. Before he slipped away into dreamland, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and held tight, feeling the beating of his heart against hers.
She needn't have worried; Derek folded her even closer as his mouth coaxed hers open and his tongue found hers. He tasted sweet and clean, like the peppermint gum he favored and something else intoxicating and good that she'd never had before and couldn't get enough of. She knew it was purely Derek.
Tingles danced along her nerves as Derek lowered his hands, cupping her bottom. Slowly, he lifted her to her tiptoes and held her as he devoured her mouth. Their bodies aligned together, his hardness and her softness meshing and blending just the slightest bit in absolute harmony.
Oh, my, Penelope thought. We're a perfect fit.
All too soon, Derek lowered her back to her feet, supporting her in his arms as he lifted his head to press kisses to her temple, her eyelids, her jaw. Her legs felt weak and kittenish. Standing wouldn't have been possible if he hadn't held her. They were both breathing heavy, and Penelope was shivering from emotion.
He rested his cheek against the top of her head. "Sometimes," he murmured, "it's not just what you want. It's what you need." Gently, he cupped her chin, his long fingers stroking her jaw and along her neck in a familiar caress. "Penelope, I need you. I've never needed anyone in like I need you."
A warm smile curled her lips, and she snuggled back into his chest. "I missed you ,too, Derek."
They stood together, just holding each other for a moment, neither of them saying a word. But as usual between them, silence wasn't golden, and she was so happy, she couldn't help but giggle.
"Baby Girl," he asked, smiling down at her. "What are you thinking?"
Penelope grinned. "That you make wonderful decisions about what you want."
He grinned back at her and then released her, only to slide his arm around her again. "That's my girl."
Penelope's heart was singing happily, and she leaned into his side. "I love you, Derek."
"I love you, too, Penelope," he replied, and then added with a twinkle in his eyes, "and that ain't no secret."
Penelope laughed and lead him toward the couch. "Come on. Iron Man 2 is waiting."
"Damn good movie," he said.
"It's awful," she argued, but she was still smiling. She couldn't help herself. Because things weren't just back to normal... They were better than ever.